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Alexandr Alexeevich Borisov - Seals (1912)
From the diaries of the artist: «It was very difficult to work; I had to cut the brushes, make the bristle short, rub the colors was almost inconceivable. <… > The hand is cracking, it is breaking; the roaring hands refuse to serve. But you draw, all thirsty to put on the canvas these bizarre, gloomy, full of peculiar beauty paintings of the Far North» (source)
this is what I mean about how right now in the united states (won't speak for elsewhere but feel free to lmk in the notes if you'd like) a lot of us trans adults who are able to access transition care can only do so at the direct expense of trans minors. this clinic would not have opened if they held the line and offered equal access to healthcare to trans minors.
"Martin announced the direct-care clinic, calling it “one of the first times a public health department has ever taken that step.” But when Cabán pushed back, pointing out that trans youth are the ones most under attack right now—noting that there are “almost no providers” left for youth the entire city—Martin indicated the clinic would not serve youth, citing the need to “strike a balance” between providing care and avoiding “clawbacks from the federal government.” This morning, EITM can directly confirm that the age cutoff is 19—matching the Trump administration’s executive order threshold, not the standard legal age of adulthood in New York."
a lot of the structural transphobia we are experiencing is hitting minors even worse. their care gets banned first. if you want a preview of what access to healthcare will look like for us trans adults in 2 years, look at what access looks like for legal minors right now.
please have the compassion to show them solidarity now. do for them what you hope a cis person will do for us. like at the very least, talk about it.
patient needs neck kisses to survive
I would. Like to speak again. About how Ilya is not actually being submissive. During tuna melt frot. But I will get myself in trouble again. So I can't.
Okay okay okay. The number of times I just watched tuna frot was obscene but I am ready to speak.
So. I would like to start by saying that quite literally everything that Shane does in that scene is submissive. Ilya isn't overly dominant in the scene, true--we've seen him much more assertive. However, it's pretty obvious that, despite Shane initiating, Ilya has the control. And Shane initiating doesn't read as dominant. Shane kisses Ilya's body, beelining for Ilya's crotch, and then buries his face there. This is...somewhat textbook submission.
When Shane swings a leg over, we see the placement of Ilya's hands. We see him subtly correcting Shane's posture, the way he wants him to sit. Shane is physically on top of Ilya but he is not in what's really thought of as a dominant position. Lapsitting is, itself, an element of kink and in certain communities is considered a way to establish possession over a submissive partner; i.e. the submissive sits in the dominant's lap to show who they belong to. They're not in public so it's not really that, but I do really believe it's still meant to be read as shorthand for Shane's submissive tendencies. Which have been spoken about, multiple times, by multiple people involved in making the show, including Hudson Williams.
Now we reach the big moments that tend to be cited by submissive/switch Ilya truthers as indicators of submission:
The 'Seeing God' look that he aims at Shane
"Gonna come for me, Rozanov?" "Fucking make me."
Ilya's vocalizations
So let's address them in order.
Ilya's 'Seeing God' look is, I will admit, heady. But I don't see it as submissive. Ilya, I think, just straight up thinks that Shane is beautiful and it's showing on his face. Connor is a really expressive actor. It shows here. Ilya's thought process is really obvious here, thanks to Connor's skill, and it's pretty clearly something along the lines of: Holy shit. This man continues to be the most beautiful man I have ever seen. And he is taking his dick out. And he's going to rub our dicks together. Lucky me. Also, Ilya in this moment is under the impression that he and Shane have agreed to be--not together maybe, but more. More than what they've been. Ilya thinks that they are consummating the end of their hookup era. He's allowing himself to do some things he maybe hasn't done before. Look a little longer, maybe, or a little nicer. This is still Ilya setting the tone. And, at the end of the day, they're having sex. His expressions are going to be pretty drunken.
Shane's, "Gonna come for me, Rozanov?" has never, and I mean never read as dominant to me. He's practically whining, and tone in human communication holds almost as much weight as the words--sometimes more. If we replaced one single word ('for' with 'on') I genuinely don't think that anyone would think it was anything but submissive. When Ilya says Fucking make me, it's meant to be read as a command, though a soft one. It's actually still a little whiny, lmao, but Connor loses some of his gravely Ilya-tone in this scene, I think maybe because of the repeated takes or because he's matching Hudson's energy--which is shaky and a little frantic. I noticed it again on the line, "Yeah, okay, you forgot team meeting," where he sounds more like Connor than Ilya, though it's subtle. Anyway, this is a bit of a nothingburger for me. It's just a sexy thing to say and Shane probably knows that it will--y'know, make Ilya come.
Ilya's vocalizations--LET THE DOMTOPS MOAN. For God's sake. Some submissives don't like it, I guess, but in my opinion they don't know what they're missing. This was the one scene that I considered skipping when I watched with my sibling because Ilya's vocalizations literally made me feel a way that I didn't want to feel sitting in a room with family. Thankfully I was expecting it the second time and felt a little more sane about it, haha. But yeah again, nothing about this reads as submissive to me. He's just...having a good time?? He's got the guy he likes in his lap kissing him and touching his dick. I think the implication is that they've never frotted before. It's pretty fun and nice to be doing something new. Also, again, Ilya is feeling a bit less inhibited here. He thinks he and Shane have reached an understanding. He's happy. Let dominants enjoy sex...let dominants moan...God fucking dammit...
Anyway. Here are a few ways that Ilya is still dominant in this scene:
The aforementioned ways in which Ilya guides Shane's body.
I do believe that Ilya nudges Shane to get in his lap when he has his face in Ilya's crotch but that's up for interpretation
Ilya gives several approvals throughout the scene. His Mm-hms early in the scene and his Da, like that a bit later. We know already that Shane likes to have Ilya's permission/approval. This is probably a normal part of their sex and not unique to this moment of their relationship, though this is the only time we see it onscreen.
The big one, for me, is Ilya making Shane hold out his hand to be spit in. That's...very dynamic-y, in my mind. That's not really something that I imagine a submissive deciding to do. Even if the argument is that Ilya is a switch--which I think it is, for most people. It just doesn't read as even remotely submissive to me, I'm sorry. I don't really know what a dominant headspace is like but if Shane wanted to be dominant over Ilya in that moment at all, I think that would take him out of it a bit.
In summary:
Shane initiates, is maybe driving a bit, but Ilya is in control. Every escalation Shane makes in the scene is with Ilya's permission. You can see it in the way he helps Shane with their clothing, in the way he places his hands on very proprietary areas of Shane's body--his hips, then his chest. There's even a part I noticed in my multiple replays of the scene for this breakdown where it looks like Shane is nosing in for a kiss that he does not receive until Ilya allows it (It looks like he's busy watching Shane jerk him off, which...we know Ilya likes to watch it go in, so). Shane is servicing Ilya. Ilya is directing the ways Shane's body moves. They're not performing kink, to be clear--like, this isn't a scene. They're just having sex. But they have a very clear dynamic that they don't stray from and that dynamic involves Ilya being dominant. I can't force people to see it this way but I can tell you that that is what it reads as to someone who, at the very lease, knows what submission looks and feels like in the body and knows that that's not what Ilya is doing in that scene.

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i would smoke an enchanted cigarette if given the opportunity
I THINK LOVE IS SOMETHING / THAT HAPPENS TO OTHER PEOPLE - Michael Gray Bulla
'Soup Is One Form of Salt Water' — Heather Christle
girl, get up. (2025) dir. James Mackel

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5 28 37 43 for the hr ask game
from this ask game
5. Are you a fan of romance books in general?
not particularly! I didn’t read heated rivalry until the show came out, i think it’s not the first romance book i’ve read but it’s not a genre i seek out. perhaps the first non lesbian romance book i’ve read?
28. Rec a fanfic! Or fan edit! Or fanart! Or fan artist!
ok i did just answer this one but have a couple more! virtue theory by gone_girl goes crazyyyy on the shane thesis re: disordered eating like i immediately incorporated that into #myshane. combat medicine by @maple-salad makes me shiver (positive) i love hockey (or hockey adjacent) equipment :). cottaging also by gone_girl is rlly good ilya pov and i love conceptual wordplay :’)
also art: this one of Hands is amazing, i’m a sucker for shanezine, and this inspired one of bloodied up shane is still living in my head
37. Favorite headcanon?
for the sake of not driving myself up a wall i’ll set aside the rewrite of tlg that lives in my head. i love period accurate hcs, like ilya tagging shane to do the ice bucket challenge and ilya’s post tuna meltdown crashout being exacerbated by the untimely death of vine. also i believe whoever said that shane has to lock the door when he does yoga if he doesn’t want ilya to rip him apart by the teeth. my evil version of that is that once they’re living together ilya makes him wear a plug whenever he does yoga for obvious reasons. also tpe orgasm control is real and true to me it’s not even a headcanon it’s like a comfort item i carry around
43. Biggest wish for season 2?
mmm honestly that they just continue to have fun with it and the hype doesn’t result in ppl stalking the filming locations, that they still have enough time to devote as much work as they did in s1 because the chemistry and summer camp vibes really made so much of this #work. also that whoever they cast for the new characters has good and chill vibes. also i would love if they adjusted the pacing to leave more time for fallout of the outing but ultimately i trust jacob tierney’s assessment of what needs to happen re: writing
hi hi hiiiiiii
28 please! (Rec a fanfic! Or fan edit! Or fanart! Or fan artist!)
from this ask game
this is a fun one!! my truth is i don’t read as much fic as i have open tabs lol but surprised myself by Loving both the mormon missionaries au by Charlotte_Stant and the frat au by garagepaperback. any au where shane isn’t a hockey player i didn’t think i could believe and both are concepts i’m not sure how i found myself into but they are very well executed and are both perfect outlets for the utter depth of shane’s devotion.
love the red wine supernova edit and the hockey song one (love edits that lean into the humor of juxtaposing scenes with lyrics 🤩
thank u :)
"Caramel listening to her ipawd", 2007
I’ve had tumblr for 4 years but some of you bitches have had it for a decade. It’s time to seek penance
wait I’m curious now . Reblog this with how long u’ve been on tumblr for. Dating back to ur oldest blog ever !!!

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I do appreciate all the support on my post about Marlow Trottie, but yall need to do that kind of thing for Black trans women while they're still alive too. That's actually more important in a lot of ways.
please help my friend move to safer housing, shes a black trans woman who i love so dearly and who deserves every good opportunity that comes her way
EMERGENCY SURVIVAL FUNDS NEEDED We are a Black trans disabled couple with a cat… Tori Peck needs your support for Survival Funds for Hea
the gfm is not yet updated to reflect this but we do need to reach $2,500 as soon as possible so she can move. her partner has a post fundraising for them with more payment info if ppl need ❤️
The Trump administration is spending more than $100 million to fight the "emergency" of "white genocide" in South Africa.
Every single one of the 599 refugees the US admitted last month was a white South African, according to data the State Department’s Bureau of Population released Friday.
In fact, so was every other refugee admitted this year. Since October 1, 2025, the US has accepted 6,668 refugees. Of those, 6,665 were white South Africans. Three—admitted last November—were from Afghanistan. No other refugees were admitted.