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it literally does not matter that they were ‘soulmates’ or whatever like he was still a GROWN man that thought it was okay to start a relationship with someone who was, what, 14? 15?

While I agree with your premise that you can love a story and criticize it for its issues, I’d have to respectfully disagree with your claim that their relationship, itself, was problematic.

If you take it at surface level, then yes, it seems morally shaky. However, you fail to consider the context. *Note: I’ll be using the official Tokyopop translation for this discussion. 

As @ethics-basket mentioned, Katsuya never intended to enter a relationship with Kyoko until she at least was presumably either finishing high school or finished high school (at the very least until she was of legal age). 

That’s why until the turning point, he never made a move on her. She fell in love with him, but even Kyoko was unsure if he reciprocated or if he was just pitying her (like he saw her as a stray dog he took under his wing). But Kyoko was so desperate for positive attention of any sort, she was willing to even accept the “pity” that Katsuya gave her. But, all the same, she didn’t want to burden him.

It was very clear that Katsuya wasn’t going to move forward was this relationship until Kyoko was at least of legal age. Thus it’s clear that he wasn’t in love with her for her age (like a creep/pedo would be), he was in love with her despite her age. (Also note: ya’ll be acting like he’s in his late 20′s, but the guy is like 20-21. He’s still really young.) 

However, now the whole context thing comes into play. Keep in mind that Kyoko literally just got beaten the heck up after quitting her gang, kicked out of her parents home with little warning and only a small duffle bag and the clothes on her back, wasn’t able to enter high school (and likely wouldn’t have been able to pay the tuition on her own regardless), she’s far too injured to work, has no money to find a place to live, if she stays on the street her former gang will probably beat her up again (or even kill her) or even worse she’d get abducted by an actual creep because she can’t fight back due to her injuries. She literally has nothing. If she goes to the police, they’d just throw her into a foster home or adoption agency where the cycle of abuse would likely continue (since no good family would adopt a former delinquent who probably has some criminal records on her), or the police might even throw her in jail once they see her criminal record, and she’d continue to break and potentially regress into the husk she once was. Katsuya couldn’t even refer her to a family member to stay with because he wasn’t on good terms with any of them, even his own father and siblings, and even if he was they DEFINITELY wouldn’t have taken her in (and we see how much they hated and looked down on Kyoko in the first volume itself, to the point where their disdain carried over onto Tohru, their own flesh and blood). Basically Kyoko had nowhere to go and no way to support herself, she was pretty much left for dead. Katsuya was her only lifeline, and he was completely aware of that. He knew there was only one safe option for her.

So instead of being wishy-washy and vague, and playing around with her feelings. He was extremely direct with her. He proposed and took responsibility for her. He basically declared that he would take care of her, protect her, and be by her side to support her for the rest of his life (/sobs/). 

Now I just want to say that no, this is clearly NOT the ideal situation. Even Katsuya (Mr. Always 3 Steps Ahead) didn’t plan for this. Ideally, of course, Kyoko would have graduated high school at 18, and then they would have entered a relationship and eventually gotten married. He loved her enough to be willing to wait for her without even making a move until then. However, when the cards were dealt and they were given a crappy hand, he made the best decision he could come up with. He did what he could, which was take responsibility and marry Kyoko (his way of protecting her without beating around the bush like most shoujo mangas tend to do where they live together and try to be platonic but then drama happens and they kiss and stuff but the guy doesn’t want to get serious, etc etc). So no, it wasn’t ideal. But when has ANYTHING in Fruits Basket been ideal? This is a series about a group of emotionally (sometimes physically) abused and neglected children (except Hiro) who work with what they have and do their best to heal. So no, obviously I wouldn’t want this exact scenario to happen to in real life, but I also wouldn’t want the rest of Fruits Basket to happen in real life either. You may say that the premise is problematic, but that’s the whole point. Everyone’s backstory is problematic, but they’re still making the best of it. The circumstances behind the relationship is problematic (ie. her abuse, neglectful family, getting injured, unable to enter school), but the relationship itself is far from problematic. That’s the beautifully crazy part about this manga. NOTHING is idealized. Everyone has their traumas and their wounds hiding underneath their mask, but they’re working with what they’ve got to make the best of life and become better people to end this cycle of abuse. 

And also this isn’t just some guy in his mid-to-late-20s picking up a random, normal 15-year-old middle school girl and dating her. This is a guy who’s fallen in love with a broken girl who basically gave his own life meaning, and was willing to wait for her, but, in order to protect her from unforeseen circumstances, had to speed up his plans a bit. 

also, just because he was waiting for her to be 18 doesn’t make it any better. a grown man waiting around for a minor to be of legal age? Gross.

Like I said, there are aspects of their relationship that I like that you mentioned here. But, you could get the same affect WITHOUT a student-teacher relationship. Kyoko didn’t have to be 15. Or Katsuya could have been more her age. Doesn’t matter, the point is there didn’t have to be that disgusting ass age difference to get all of what Takaya wanted us to feel/see from their relationship.

it literally does not matter that they were ‘soulmates’ or whatever like he was still a GROWN man that thought it was okay to start a relationship with someone who was, what, 14? 15?