Don't Stop Believing

me and my friend arriving at an all you can eat buffet 

UNBLOCKED

i’m a sucker for cute, long text messages

Your instrument coming after you to find out why the fuck you’re not practicing on it

i don’t think there’s anything worse than not being able to finish your lap in mario kart because ur in last place what kind of discrimination is that 

sometimes I get so jealous of other people’s social skills. like damn. they can talk to people?? and people like them?? look at all those people who like them. wtf. illegal

My sense of humor is growing more and more ridiculous because I was just sitting here by myself thinking like what if instead of saying “are you kidding me” we said weird food related things like “are you frying my rice right now” or even “are you seriously buttering all of my toast with this” and honestly I cried

this post is the best thing I’ve ever put on this site because I’m still getting messages and replies from people with their own versions of these jokes

#are you flipping my pancakes

It’s really up to interpretation 🤣

this’ll get me adopted in no time

On some real shit, I do not fuck with people who ride those boat things at the carnival. People who get on those do not give a fuck about life, they don’t care about you, ya mama or your kids. They literally have nothing to lose. You don’t care about life so there’s no need for me to fight you because you’re not going to give a damn about my face. 

12? I got on this bitch when I was 21 and had my head in my ex’s shoulder the ENTIRE time. Screaming like a bih too. Nope. Never again. I was praying to the gravity gods the entire time.

?????? All it does is swing back and forth???? I don’t understand the concern??????

centrifugal force keeps you in your seat.

Centrifugal force isn’t keeping me from crying tho

why is this so funny