Letter 7: Why?
Dear Mark,
Itâs December 28, 12:46 a.m.
It hurts. I havenât felt this kind of pain since last year, and Iâm confused because love isnât supposed to feel like this.
I know I said you could take your time, but honestly, that was a lie. Iâm trying to be patient, but my heart is aching so badly. I hope you donât take too long.
I want you. I want you so much. Pero ayoko ng may kahati. Gusto kong mahalin nang buo, yung ako lang, walang kahati, walang tanong.
Natatakot ako. Kahit ginagawa kong biro, kahit mukhang okay lang ako, I am scared.
Iâm not confident in myself. Sheâs been with you for five years. She knows you deeply. You have cats together. You live in the same place. Sheâs been with you in every trip, every chapter.
Where do I fit in?
Weâve only known each other for a few months. I know you, but what if not enough? Iâm scared of cats. I live here in Laguna. Our world has only reached as far as Santolan station.
Nalilito ako kung bakit pinapatagal mo pa.
Para hindi siya masaktan?
Pero ako, hindi ba ako nasasaktan?
Masakit gumising araw-araw na nasa survival mode. Checking if Iâm still here. If youâve changed your Spotify photo again. If youâve blocked me again.
Nakakatakot.
I love you so much, and it hurts.












