So this is a thing.

when you die and go to hell this is what the devil plays while kicking your ass

Ohhhhhhhhhh

“i can leave the door open while i’m cleaning my bathroom,” i reasoned to myself. “surely my beloved cat, Meatball, isn’t dumb enough to try and jump into an open toilet full of Clorox”

i caught this tiny-little fool MID-FUCKING-AIR. i watched him start leaping and time literally slowed down. and then he had the audacity, the NERVE, to beep indignantly at me for ruining his plans

Iconic

This is probably one of the best moments in Spongebob’s history.

You’re RUINING the LORE by ROBBING her of her CYBERNETICALLY ENHANCED TACTICAL ASS

“Help Desk, this is Gloriline, what did you fuck up this time?” *indistinct vocals* “Dave, I’ve seen the news, and, frankly, I can see the ash cloud from here. You paid for extended support, not enabling support.”

I don’t play wizards anymore because they’re too much like my day job.

Instead of a orb the wizard has a little statue of a duck he tells his spells to and then swears when he spots the obvious mistake.

ask me about the difference between leopard/cheetah/jaguar print, it’s my field of expertise 

What is the difference? Please learn me a thing

Cats love jazz

there it is

Unmute

OH MY FUCKING GOD

Plankton’s VA: “My name is Plankton. Come and eat at the Chum Bucket! Every fucking day! You come down, and we’ll shuff your face full of shit! [laughs] I’m just kidding, don’t come to the Chum Bucket. It’s horrible. Horrible!”

This is all i ever wanted, to hear plankton say “fuck”