Alluring Weddings

I was closing up shop one day when a former client who had made several orders before just before I closed. She’d always been pleasant, so I figured what the heck, I’d help her out. 

Client: I’m so glad I made it before you closed! I forgot my son’s birthday was today, and I need a cake for him!

Me: Well, I can’t make you a cake right now, but I do have some pre-made ones that I’d be happy to put his name on!

Client: I don’t want a pre-made cake,  I want a unique one! It has to be special! Can’t you just go make one?

Thus began an exchange on what kind of cake she was looking for. Since she had always been such a good client, I was thinking I might be able to do something. We usually had a few cakes in the cooler, just in case someone came in early and had a rush order, and so on. What she wanted was just a bit too complicated to be done on a rush order. She wanted a three tier cake, shaped like a volcano. Two carved round tiers to make the volcano, resting on a full sheet of “ground,” with dinosaurs and cavemen running from lava. 

Me: I’m really sorry, but it would take me at least 3 hours to carve, frost, and decorate a cake like that. Do you have any other ideas that would be less complicated? 

Client: I can’t believe this! You’re going to ruin my son’s birthday!

Me:  (blinking) With all due respect, you admitted to me that you forgot his birthday. You came to me, minutes before closing, to request a cake that would take me hours to finish. How is this my fault? 

Client: You don’t understand! It’s because I didn’t think he would notice his birthday was today! I thought I could just skip it and he wouldn’t know! It’s all my sister’s fault! She told him happy birthday and gave him a present!

Me: That still isn’t my fault. Look. I can sell you one of the cakes that is already made, but beyond that I’m afraid I can’t help you. 

Client: FINE! I’ll take my business elsewhere, where they care!