iris of mandalore

GOLD    —     those who rule from a throne of gold lead their people fiercely and courageously.  even when they feel unfit to rule, they soldier on and never let their fears weaken any aspect of their reign.  they value bravery over all other assets.  although they care for their people with a burning loyalty,  they also believe that violence is sometimes necessary,  a symbol of strength to protect the kingdom when it is threatened.

                    so  many  had  told  him  to  let  go  of  his  past  ,  to  move  on  from  his  mistakes  &  bury  the  past.   if  only  it  were  so  easy  ,  yet  it  should  be  (  for  a  jedi  ).   yet  ,  how  could  he  overcome  his  failings  ?   beyond  that  ,  there  were  ties  cut  too  soon  (  connections  lost  before  they  can  be  found  ).   some  ,  however  ,  withstood  the  test  of  time.   sometimes  ,  they  waited  this  long  for  a  reason  ,  to  be  hope  when  it  was  needed  most  (  or  a  reminder  to  keep  fighting  for  it  ).

                    his  heart  ached  more  than  usual  today  ,  yet  it  panged  with  another  feeling  ,  one  he  couldn’t  quite  understand.   these  days  ,  he  stopped  questioning  the  pain  (  he  has  to  live  with  worse  ).   his  head  turns  at  the  stranger  behind  him  ,  glancing  down  at  his  sleeve  caught  within  her  grasp.   his  expression  shifts  with  confusion  ,  yet  his  chest  twists  slightly.   the  bold  confession  as  well  as  her  tone  ensnares  him  (  panic  mixes  with  confusion  as  he’s  placed  on  edge  ).  ❛  what  ?   i’m  sorry  ,  you  must  be  mistaken.  ❜   a  beat  ,  though  ,  he  doesn’t  pull away.  ❛  who  are  you  ?  ❜

vencikye hadn’t thought,  when she’d reached out to catch his sleeve;  it would’ve been a simple action,  had it been anyone else,  but it was him.  it was him,  and there was so much she hadn’t said,  so much that was conveyed in that reckless contact instead.  her relief to see him alive,  her need to touch him and make sure he was real,  mingled with longing so raw that it made her ache.  please don’t go,  please listen to me,  please be my father.  he doesn’t pull away,  and that is already a gift,  however small.

of course he doesn’t recognize her;  they haven’t seen each other in over a decade,  during which time she’s grown from a girl into a woman,  and her hair is dyed auburn besides.  “  i am not mistaken,  ”  vencikye tells him in a tone that brooks no argument,  not unlike her mother’s.  “  as for who i am,  i  am  —  ”  the words catch in her throat.  she cannot say her name,  not out here,  and her alias will mean nothing to him.  there’s only one answer to that.  for a moment she thinks that she mustn’t tell;  but there is no jedi order anymore,  no choice to force him into.  and even if there were  ...  perhaps her mother had been wrong,  to want to spare him.  he’d deserved to know,  and she’d deserved a father.  she licks her lips and whispers,  “  i am your daughter.  ” 

                Usually  meditating  in  the  gardens  cleared  his  head,  but  for  some  reason…  it  was  cloudy.  It  irritated  him,  brows  twitched  with  annoyance,  a  breath  drawn  out  softly.  Obi-Wan  didn’t  even  realize  the  young  girl  approaching  him.  So,  the  cleared  throat  took  him  by  surprise.  Pale  blues  lifted,  and  arms  uncrossed  from  his  chest.  He  allowed  his  lips  to  spread  in  a  smile,  “  It’s…  it’s  nothing.  ”  he  muttered  softly,  a  hand  moved  to  wave  it  off.

          The  darkness  followed  him,  head  pounding  with  pain.  Such  adventures  ruined  his  mind  in  a  way,  and  it  could  not  be  fixed.  Any  ounce  of  straining,  stress  filled  tasks,  opening  up  to  the  Force  emotionally…  a  migraine  burned  at  his  temples.  Such  a  thing  to  live  with,  “  I  know  I  can,  young  one,  and  I  thank  you  for  that,  ”  his  smile  grew  just  a  bit  more,  “  Though,  to  talk  about  what  is  bothering  me,  I  must  know  exactly  what  is  bothering  me.  Unfortunately,  there  is  little  to  no  information  on  it.  It’s  a  learning  curve  me  and  a  few  others  are  trying  to  understand.  ”

vencikye did not argue with her master’s dismissal,  but she did shoot him a disbelieving look.  that hadn’t sounded like nothing.  nonetheless she returned his smile,  thinking that surely now he would talk to her,  but as he went on her smile faded.  she blinked,  processing what she’d just been told.  obi-wan had said a lot only to say nothing in the end,  it seemed to her.  she had no idea what he was talking about,  but she could feel that he was in pain even as he smiled.  she frowned slightly,  and patted his shoulder.

“  that all sounds  ...  awfully complicated,  ”  she said quietly,  hand still on his shoulder.  “  i’m not sure i understand,  master.  there is little to no information on what?  do you not even know what it is?  i mean,  i understood you’re trying to learn about it,  but that sounds  ...  confusing.  ominous,  even.  are you making any progress?  ”  she paused,  shifting her position a bit.  feeling her master’s pain was uncomfortable,  but she still had not tuned it out.  she liked knowing how others felt;  she always felt closer to them herself as a result.  “  maybe a healer might be able to help?  at least with the physical pain part of this  ...   this problem.  ”

          𝐐𝐔𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐋𝐘,      scornful  expression  came  to  light,  thinly  belied  this  weathering,  false  masquerade.  There  were  little  differences  between  the  woman  before  him  and  the  girl  of  yesteryear  she  once  were.  Fanciful  delusions  (    no  doubt  an  inclination  from  her  mother    )  still  danced  like  starlights  within  her  mind.  She  dreamt  of  a  paradise  found  in  fairytales  ;  an  Eden  that  never  were  and  never  could  be.  Reality  demanded  sacrifices.  Only  fools  continued  to  dwell  upon  false  promises.  Paper-thin  smile  broke  forth  as  he  leaned  forward.      ❝    Picture  this    —    you,  who  grew  up  in  a  lapse  of  luxury,  where  hunger  and  poverty  had  no  meaning,  decide  to  needlessly  self-adjudge  a  member  of  the  rebellion  already  sanctioned  by  your  superiors.    ❞      Krennic  responded.  Venomous  bile  underlined  each  syllable,  releasing  its  raucous  miasma.      ❝    The  reason  ?  Because  you  didn’t  like  the  sound  of  his  tone.  Will  I  be  imprisoned  because  I  failed  to  curtsy  ?    ❞

          Guttural  laughter  scrapped  his  throat  ;  hollow  and  devoid  of  genuine  merriment.  He  shook  his  head.      ❝    In  addition,  your  observational  skills  leave  much  to  be  desired.  Have  a  look  then,  duchess    —    ❞      Krennic  continued  before  shifting  to  reveal  his  left  profile.  Furrowed  deeply  like  cracks  from  his  temple  down  to  the  top  of  his  cheeks  were  scars  carved  into  the  flesh.      ❝    Your  answer  has  already  been  spoken  for.    ❞

𝚅𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙸𝙺𝚈𝙴 𝙺𝚁𝚈𝚉𝙴

vencikye remained impassive even as he leaned forward,  the only sign of tension in the set of her shoulders.  as he spoke,  however,  she clenched her fists and grit her teeth.  “  this has nothing to do with how i grew up or with your tone,  krennic.  stop putting words in my mouth.  ”  she replied,  her tone cool despite the anger coursing underneath.  “  i’m well within my right to question you,  and i’m doing so because i have no reason to trust you.  ”  or the judgement of my superiors,  she added mentally,  albeit thinking of one superior in particular.  she had to wonder what her mother’s opinion of orson krennic was,  as well as what sort of intelligence would be worth welcoming him into their ranks.  she knew mon mothma well enough not to think the woman naïve;  on the contrary,  she was smart,  and vencikye would not be surprised to hear that she was already keeping an eye on their newest recruit.  she resolved to bring her concerns up to the chancellor all the same.  the more cautious they were the better, after all.

as krennic went on,  she forgot about mothma for the moment.  “  i am not blind,  ”  she informed him,  obviously unimpressed.  she’d seen enough scars not to flinch at the sight of his,  as bad as they were,  and frankly the fact that he thought that was answer enough was laughable.  she did indeed laugh,  the sound just as hollow and mocking as his own laughter had been.  “  do forgive me if i’m not convinced by your display.  i have my own scars and i’m losing my hearing,  and i did not run to the empire with the rebellion’s secrets.  all you have shown me is that your loyalty lies where it’s convenient for you.  ”

( @alligais​ // ily ❤️ )

WERE IT NOT FOR THE Creed, Cassandra would have backed out. She was a hired gun only in the sense that she had a gun and had been hired. What motives she might have for accepting such work were the business of her and her Tribe. Certainly, her employers were too occupied with their own affairs to take her for more than what she seemed to be. The Movement for the Protection of Life, on occasion, had to take thought for the protection of their own lives, and when their resources were insufficient, they were obliged, as all were, to seek outside aid. She had not wondered at the time why the Movement’s representative had seem so pleased to take her on. A Mandalorian in beskar was an exceptional resource.

          Then those fair blue eyes came into view, and she understood.

          Here, unless she was much mistaken, was a Mandalorian but not a Child of the Watch. No doubt that representative had thought she would be comforted by Cassandra’s presence. Alas for the small ignorances of outsiders.

         Thus came the call to back out, but she had given her word. To back out of this job would be to back out of the Creed, and that was more odious. Instead — Instead, she should have made herself less conspicuous, but it had been drilled into her too hard to keep a threat in her line of sight, and there was only a few feet between them now.

vencikye had been entertained in talk with a small circle of her coworkers,  laughing as she listened to the stories shared and sharing her own,  like any other moment of leisure between missions.  she did her best to enjoy such times,  to keep the stress for the missions themselves  —  yet she felt a pinprick of fear as she noticed that she was being watched.  surely she was in no danger here,  among colleagues;  but even as she tried to tell herself that,  the alarm remained.  her attention wandered away from the conversation,  blue eyes darting through the room,  searching  ...  and landed on a mandalorian clad in beskar’gam not unlike her own,  and just as hard to miss.  the fact that they had their helmet on indoors was conspicuous,  as well.

she thought she had seen that beskar before,  but she could not be sure.

unless,  of course,  she spoke to this person directly.  she would’ve liked to ignore them,  in truth,  but whoever they were,  they had been watching her.  thus,  vencikye excused herself and crossed the few feet that separated them.  she was aware of her coworkers’ eyes trailing after her,  as aware as she had been of the mandalorian’s.  she thought she heard someone say  “oh,  another mandalorian.  how nice”.  how little they knew,  really.

“  excuse me,  ”  she said simply.  up close,  the beskar was indeed familiar.  she remembered it as well as she remembered telling her son “she’s a fanatic,  darling”.  vencikye might have flushed with shame at the memory if it weren’t true.  it was true,  however,  and so she only wondered:  what in gods’ names was cassandra,  of all people,  doing here?  “  it’s  ...  rather a surprise to meet you,  i have to say.  you’ve taken up humanitarian work?  ”

“  okay.  alright,  ”  vencikye started,  breathing deeply.  her workplace wasn’t the best fit for ‘bring your children in to work’ day,  and really she’d never have thought of doing so if they’d given her even a minute of peace about the heroes of scarif.  as it was,  they hadn’t shut up in the last week and jyn had  (  bless her  )  agreed to it,  so here she was,  standing outside the woman’s room with three children.  “  remember,  this is a medcenter and jyn erso is in recovery.  speak quietly.  ”

before she could say anything else,  alia was opening the door and strolling in,  her youngest brother immediately dashing in after her.  she could hear him saying how jyn was so cool,  and how he wanted to be like her when he grew up,  and  —  alia,  too,  was talking about how jyn was her role model,  at the same time as her little brother.  so much for not overwhelming her patient.  esdra at least looked at her for permission before he went in after his siblings.  she smiled to herself and shook her head before she walked inside herself.

“  sorry,  jyn,  they’ve been terribly excited,  ”  vencikye said with a smile.  in the five seconds she’d been outside,  her youngest had climbed up the hospital bed already.  she sighed and gestured for him to get down.  he didn’t argue,  only grinned as he obeyed.  “  did you remember to introduce yourselves,  ad’ike?  ”  she asked the children,  who shook their heads with matching expressions of surprise;  alia let slip an “oh”.  her smile grew larger,  and her tone was soft with fondness as she went on.  “  of course you wouldn’t have,  with all this excitement.  jyn,  these are alia,  esdra and callias.  ”  as she introduced them,  they greeted her in turn,  alia with an enthusiastic “nice to meet you”,  esdra with a smile and a quiet “hi”,  and callias with a wave and another grin.  he then turned to her and said “come on, baba!”.  vencikye laughed and stepped closer,  joining the trio beside the bed.

“  that’s better,  darlings.  thanks for having us today,  jyn.  ”