Befriending the Emotional Brain
From the book The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk. Read this last winter and wrote down a lot of what I learned that was spiritually safe, so here we go!!
â˘Â  1.  Hyperarousal (Hypo) - Strength training and regular stretching is really calming and wakes up your body. Deep breathing counting 4 going in, 4 holding, and 4 going out helps. OR change up the count time. I typically make it 4-7-8. A new computer program called Neurofeedback seems to be promising in nonverbally talking down the brain into calming down. Other than that, the healthy coping techniques (to distract from triggers or process memories) of TF-CBT, DBT, or the Extensive Preparation and Stabilization period of EMDR should help with this. I would also recommend Kati Morton on YouTube for her great videos on coping techniques.
â˘Â  2.  Body Awareness - Are you aware what your body feels like during each emotion? If youâre not sure, print out or make a wheel of emotion like these babies:
Cause once you know what youâre feeling, you can journal about it. Other descriptive words of what thatâs like, what you notice yourself leaning towards doing because of this emotion, such as negative coping mechanisms of lashing out at others and being passive aggressive, pushing and running away into your work, going into your daydream world and sleeping, addictions to alcohol, drugs, food or starving and purging, self harm, love, sex, porn, video games, technology etc. Or maybe you cope badly by people pleasing and being codependent on toxic people so they donât leave you. Deciding whether to distract or sit and feel (process) through that emotion till itâs gone.Â
â˘Â  3.  Safe Relationships - Family, friends, AA meetings, veteransâ organizations, church communities, and therapists. People who will let you talk about your trauma and feelings, who understand and have empathy and compassion (because that drives out your shame and helps you heal). I know itâs hard to find someone who will actually emotionally support you the way you might have supported them in the past, but Iâve been told people like this exist somewhere, so donât give up looking. At the most, a therapist is trained in understanding and compassion, and a support group gives you a chance at talking without being judged and interrupted or being given bad advice, and the more you go the more you feel a bit more comfortable in trying out the Steps and Principles theyâre based on. Looking after horses at a Recovery Ranch or maybe animals at the shelter, or any kind of pet also helps you to heal if people are too scary to work with at the present, cause the animals gradually help you to relax and open up around people eventually.Â
â˘Â  4.  Rhythm and Synchrony - Singing, dancing, theater, writing, drawing, painting, Sensorimotor therapy, Dance/Movement therapy, Somatic Experiencing therapy, sensory integration, parent-child interaction therapy. I donât know how true it is for PTSD sufferers, but for C-PTSD sufferers who struggle with varying amounts of dissociation and amnesia, trauma is stored in the body, like in the nervous system, so-to speak. Trauma changes your brain so the frontal cortex of executive functioning skills are now dysfunctioning. Memories arenât being processed so theyâre being relived. And it seems like your personality isnât what it once was, or your past interests have left the building. In time while recovering, you may regain some aspects of your personality and interests back or you may not, but thatâs alright youâre still recovering and becoming your best self. So with this, we process with our bodies and not with our thinking brain, which is offline while dissociating during a trauma, flashback and trigger. This type of therapy works a whole lot better for a lot of people who canât talk about their trauma yet. Trauma can be pretty unspeakably awful, so this is a great way to go about it.
â˘Â  5.  Body work - Therapeutic massage and the FeldenKrais Method, if youâre up for it. Some people are willing to work through their anxiety and discomfort to go through with it in order to relax the body that experienced trauma in the past so itâs not so tense or numb. I can barely handle a massage chair at the local workout place near me, so you do you lol
â˘Â  6.  Taking Action - Self defense and the Model Mugging Program are pretty cool things to check out if youâre looking to try to keep yourself physically safe. I thought it was awesome that the model mugging program has women shouting to pump each other up that theyâre worth something and they can do it. Another way of taking action I believe could be simply just spreading awareness of how trauma works, how trauma bonds work and supporting other survivors in recovery. You could even volunteer somewhere to help kids with the same issues possibly, or go to college and become a social worker, lawyer, or whatever else you feel is a good fit for helping people.
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