Akmedrah

Humanities first contact gone Oh, So Right: 

Allan Mac’Millen sets out from Earth with a woman who is out of this world beautiful… Literally, aliens, government conspiracies, and amorous adventures await Allan and his compatriots in this lusty, fun-filled, world-building adventure.

Second God:

In this story, Humanity encounters life from another world, and in so doing discovers that their God is not anyone that they thought, it is in fact Cthulhu. Give it a read if you want to see how humankind deals with impending war alongside an unwanted God.

The Princess’s Man:

Will Garrow stumbles his way into the path of a wayward Princess, and chaos, adventure, and much more ensue!

One-Shot Stories:

At that moment fireworks went off and recording began playing in each language, letting the attendees know that he festival would run all month and that free transport to the lunar transit hub was included with each ticket to the festival.

"Now," the Empress said, turning to President Grotto, "I think we had best adjourn to our other meeting shall we?"

"I suppose so," Erin said, looking longingly at his family who were headed into the festival, "let's get this done so we can all enjoy the festival."

The Empress, President Grotto, and the other political representatives all walked into a waiting shuttle and were taken to the lunar transit hub, where they took a teleporter to the massive space station halfway across the galaxy.

[United Galactic Assembly headquarters, 2753]

As the Empress and President Grotto materialized, they moved off the platform to join the streams of people walking through the UGA headquarters. They all flowed into a large room, where a single being of scales and teeth stood in the middle of the room.

A viscous looking woman, stands after all the seats are filled. "I call to order the United Galactic Assembly, and call for the final vote on the induction of the Ur'Hullan to the UGA."

The Scaled being in the middle of the room stood as a statue and waited to hear the verdict on his people's induction. The votes poured in over the next fifteen minutes. Finally, it was announced by the viscous woman, "The final vote is seven hundred thirty-eight for and three hundred fifteen against. The United Galactic Assembly welcomes the Ur'Hullan people into its fold and welcomes Ambassador Tix as their first ambassador."

A cheer ran through the crowd of dignitaries. The speaker relinquished the stage to Ambassador Tix, who was expected by tradition to make a speech and a request.

The scaley man stepped forward and waited for silence. "Thank you, lady speaker, I am honored to be here, and my people, while shamed to be welcomed by one so weak, are grateful nonetheless."

A murmur ran through the crowd, and there were rumblings about the universal translator AI still adapting to the language of the Ur'Hullan. Ambassador Tix continued, "I understand that it is customary for the newly accepted peoples to make a request, either of the UGA as a whole or to a singular people. My people have a demand to make of the species that you all kowtow to, the Humans."

President Grotto got a sinking feeling in his gut. He stood to face the new Ambassador. "I will hear your request on behalf of humanity."

Ambassador Tix chuckled, "Our demand is that you soft humans quit playing at having power and turn over the machinations of your economic power to the Ur'Hullan immediately."

President Grotto quietly pressed a button inset into his wedding ring and then spoke. "That is quite the request. What happens if Humanity refuses."

"Then my people will kill your people one by one until you accept." The scaled Ambassador said with a wicked smile. "Starting with your own family."

Just then several more Ur'Hullan marched in with President Grotto's Wife and three children. The Ambassador smiled, "What can you do Mr. President? I mean you said it yourself earlier today, that over two hundred years ago Humanity lay down their weapons."

Empress Gulshik was in shock, and she was preparing to issue orders to support Humanity after President Grotto accepted the demand, she looked at the President. In all her many years of working with the man, they had grown to be good friends; their children played together, and she had never once seen anything but a warm smile from the man, even when he was upset.

Now, all the Empress saw in the eyes of the man she called friend was a cold focus that made a portion of her brain scream in fear. The President stepped forward and slowly walked to the ground level, across the open space, and up onto the raised center dais. He stood there looking at the scaled creature that was roughly his height.

"Tell me, Ambassador Tix, do your people hold to the old ways?" The President said, taking off his watch, and beginning to undo the many buttons of his dress shirt.

"We do not follow the ways of a weak species such as Humanity!" The Ambassador roared.

"No, I meant the old ways of your people," The President said, undoing the cuff buttons of his shirt, "your people follow the path of Ur Na Hallten, correct."

A brief look of surprise washed over the face of Ambassador Tix, "Yes, we do, what is it to you, weak Human?"

"In your path, you have the concept of Ki'Gara." The President said, removing his dress shirt leaving his undershirt in place, "and I challenge you to Ki'Gara as is my right according to your own path."

The roar of laughter that came from every Ur'Hullan in the hall was boisterous. Finally, after wiping the tears of mirth from his eyes, Ambassador Tix responded, "You would challenge me to single combat!? Very well, why not? As the challenge, I get to determine the stakes. If I win, Humanity will surrender its resources, as well as fifty thousand young men and women, to serve as slaves for my people. If you win, We will relinquish our claim, and my people will lay down their arms and become pacifists. Now tell me, Human, what are the conditions for victory?"

The President finished stretching as he looked up at the Ambassador, "To surrender or death, of course."

The Ur'Hullan warriors laughed again, and the President, already enraged, roared out at a volume that shocked all who were watching this happen, "Silence!"

A shocked moment allowed President Grotto to regain a modicum of calculated composure, "you asked what the conditions were and I answered, now either forfeit or prepare yourself."

The crowd remained silent as the two men prepared themselves. Finally it was time, and they squared off against each other. The President brought his fists up, and began to bounce lightly on his feet. As they circled each other, President Grotto spoke, "Tell me Ambassador Tix, did you happed to look at Humanity's history prior to us laying down our weapons?"

"Why would I care for the history of the weak!" Tix raged and lunged for the bouncing President, who dodged out of the way.

"You should have; you would have seen that my people were not always weak as you say," The President punched the Ambassador in the face after dodging another bestial lunge. "you might have seen that we were athletes and warriors of an astonishing level. You might also have seen that when we lay down our arms, we made changes to our society."

Ambassador Tix roared and launched a ferocious string of attacks, which President Grotto dodged most of, catching the claws of the Ambassador's left hand on his right shoulder. The Ambassador snarled, breathing heavily, as he continued to rain down blows.

President Grotto looked relaxed, dodging under sweeps and tossing counter attacks where he could, he spoke as they fought. "The changes that we made to our society, was to place the responsibility of safety and security onto the individual."

The Ambassador was flagging, his breath coming in desperate gasps, his arms leaden. He lunged for one final attack, intending to end the fight, and instead found himself in a chokehold. He felt the shocking muscle density contained beneath the pink human skin flex and begin to tighten down on his throat. Ambassador Tix opened his mouth to signal surrender and found himself unable to do so due to how little breath he could get.

President Grotto flexed, closing the chokehold tighter and tighter, and as the Ambassador rode the fleeting edge of consciousness, The President whispered in the Ambassador's ear, "You think that just because we lay down our weapons, we are weak, we simply do not have any adequate challengers. And you think the move to make is to threaten my family. I should kill you."

The President squeezes slightly harder until Ambassador Tix goes limp and then tosses him to the ground. "I think that I win. If you wish to wait for him to wake and surrender, I am fine with that."

The Ur'Hullan warriors dropped their weapons and let The President's family rush to him. Applause started quietly and rose to a roaring sound. As the assembled dignitaries cheered for him, President Grotto reassured his family he was okay and watched as Ambassador Tix Was woken up by the other Ur'Hullan.

When he finally woke up, President Grotto stepped forward between the Ambassador and his family, "Do you yield?"

Ambassador Tix, his teeth grinding brutally together, spoke with barely contained rage, "I... Yield."

The Ambassador turned to leave, but the President stopped him, "Ambassador Tix before you go, there is the matter of what was promised."

Every Ur'Hullan present flinched, and President Grotto continued speaking, "As is my right as victor of the Ki'Gara, I will absolve you of responsibility in upholding your agreement. Let this serve as a reminder that just because we have decided to be peaceful, does not mean that we will lay back accept a hostile takeover."

The Ur'Hullan looked relieved as they left, and President Grotto was glad that everything had turned out as it had. Before he forgot, he pressed another button hidden on his wedding ring, standing down two-hundred-year-old protocols. President Grotto looked at his children, "Shall we go home?"

They all nodded, and President Grotto left with them.

[Earth, 2753 - the next day]

As President Grotto stood with his wife, smiling at their children as they rode a traditional carnival ride, he heard a familiar voice.

"Hello, Erin."

"Empress Gulshik! What a surprise, I did not know you would be joining us today," President Grotto said with a smile, "to what do I owe the honor."

"I was hoping I might speak to you for a moment of your time about what happened yesterday." The Empress said, unsure how to deal with this man who she was not sure she knew anymore.

"Of course," The President kissed his wife on the cheek and began to walk with the Empress, her security group giving them a small bubble of space as they moved, "so what can I do for you my friend?"

"To be blunt," The Empress said, deciding to cut through the bullshit as she usually would with him, "What the fuck?!"

The President chuckled and the Empress continued, "What was that, I thought you were weak, as a people comparatively, I knew that there were powerful individuals among humanity, but I was unaware that you are one such person."

"Oh, I'm not," The President said chuckling once more at the look on the Empress's face. He took a seat on a bench seat, allowing her to climb up on the bench and situate herself before he continued, "when we lay down our weapons, we did so for many reasons."

"Yes, because you had grown past your violent ways, all the history books say this." The Empress said dismissively.

"That was part of it, certainly. What I am about to tell you is not necessarily a state secret, but it is something that we humans play close to the chest." The President looked amused at the excited look on Empress Gulshik's face, "Humanity has a past that is far bloodier than anyone in the UGA realizes, and when we first encountered the UGA, we rapidly realized that very few, if any, other species manage to get to the point of interspecies relations if they have as violent a history as we did."

The Empress was shocked; while she did not know much about human history before her time, she had thought they were always like the mild-mannered, kind, and caring people, she knew them as. The President continued talking. "We did some scouting and quickly realized that if we wanted to, we could take over the UGA through force quite easily. We estimated it would not take much longer than a week. At that moment, we decided that it was not something that we wanted, so along with some social reform, we mothballed our military weapons and ships, leaving only the planetary defenses in operation."

Empress Gulshik's eyes widened; she did not know that it was possible to have defenses on a planetary scale. She listened to the President talk for almost an hour about the social changes and how Humanity became a unified collective with peace as a goal, but also unilaterally decided that every man, woman, and child would train in combat and weapons usage under the guise of sports. When he was done, the sun had started to set, and the Empress felt like she was sitting next to a monster of some kind.

"So what questions do you have?" President Grotto asked.

"I have one question, why? Why do all this? What could possibly drive you to do this." The Empress was desperately trying to understand.

"I have three answers for that. Firstly, because of that," President Grotto chuckled, gesturing to his children who were playing with a group of children from several different races, "the hope that our children could grow up in a world where their friends could be any race, and they could go visit any world they wished to."

The Empress nodded, "And secondly?"

"For things like today," President Grotto said, "we are prepared to defend ourselves and those we care for. As a species, we are prepared to defend all our allies."

The President's tone had grown serious, and The Empress was unsure if she wanted to know the third reason. President Grotto didn't give her a chance to back out, though, and spoke. "The last reason is that the multiverse is a large place, and while we have been fortunate that almost every single race we have met has ended up being some kind of friendly, we hold no delusions. One day, the UGA will encounter a race that is hellbent on death and destruction. On that day, Humanity will take up arms once again and go to war."

Those words sent a shiver down the back of the Empress. She didn't know what to say, and was spared having to try and figure something out by President Grotto rising and bidding her farewell, and moving to join his family.

The Empress thought only one thing as she made her way back to the lunar transit hub.

"Thank the gods for Peaceful Acquisition."

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