oo krulandijvie

the eeason my dinner takes so long is i have to kiss all my onions for 45 minutes each before mincing them. this makes them blush which brings out their sweetness which is why im the highest ranking chef in the world. my final message

thid is the only post i dont mind being flooded with character tags because nobody tags it as anything other than Spongebob

pretty rude that i’m not small enough to sit under mushrooms

Tooth fairies are a smaller and friendlier subspecies of the larger and much more hostile bone fairies.

Thank you for this bespoke nightmare

bro forget that how much money do i get for a femur under my pillow

ask your doctor what the fuck

im a simple woman i laugh at my own posts and i torture my digestive system with my tendency to obey every single one of my cravings without question