Call Me Charlie

Not sure if that’s a compliment or…

It is. But it's true, no one can do Sam Smith like he does.

Hopefully my voice can do it justice.

No one can. But I'll still love it.

I have all my favourites here. Be jealous.

I'm jealous I'll never be a favorite.

It just comes naturally to me. Oh, good. I’m glad.

We all have our quirks, I guess.

I’ll sing you Status Quo from Starship. Unless you have another request?

I'm not opposed to any Sam Smith.

All my dreams are coming true. This really is paradise. And I could have sworn it was Flawless. What a terrible missed opportunity on your parents’ part.

It is, isn't it? I've known you long enough to just flash you and pretend nothing happened. I'll tell them you said so!

Yep. I know I do and I just can’t help it.

I know you can't. Don't worry, we all still love you.

It's true, okay? I'm going to keep it forever. Of course clothes will stay on, I'm not into nude beaches. Fine, fine. I'll accept your admission. Justin Bartha and a lot of other cool people.

You still do more embarrassing things though.

Lucky you! New York is awesome, but I miss home. I have Dave, Brittany and Anna over here for now though, so I won’t complain…much.

Aw, they're awesome to come see you. That's one good group of people.

I probably will be. We can cuddle until you likely fall asleep after working all day.

I'll fall asleep fast. Just sing me a lullaby.

Dianna Flawless Agron, it would be anyone’s honor to see your lovely lady lumps.

I'm going to sneakily flash you when I see you. My middle name is Elise, dork.

Way to go!

I pulled a you.

She is! Mikayla’s practically the light of our family. I miss her. I can’t wait to see her this weekend. We have family day this weekend.

Aw, family day is important. I love when I get to see my family. My big brother and I always give em hell. I hope you get to! Really, he's a brilliant man. So down to earth.

Damn straight. How are you doing?

I'm great. I'm glad filming is so close so that after night shoots, I can crash in my own bed. I miss you, though. 

  Who said it wasn’t my ass? No, but to answer your question no. Take her out to the beach and that’s as close as you’ll get to it. I love your enthusiasm! You deserve compliments though, Di. Don’t sell yourself short!

But we love each other! I bottled her fart and saved it! I will take her to the beach, and she can use my butt as a floaty. Well, thank you! I'm not, I'm not. Everyone in the cast is fucking brilliant.

Did anyone film it?

......Shit. I hope not!