-I have bought a house. It is a beautiful house with very exciting gardening prospects. We will move in late July.
-While we were closing on our house, my grandfather had a series of strokes. He got hospitalized, has now been released, and is struggling to say anything longer than a few words.
-I am very tired of taking care of people, which is a not a generous thing to say when a family member is sick, but it is the truth.
-Iām blowing off a friend this weekend to go help my aunt with my grandfather (god forbid my dad do anything), and my friendās response (basically just clearly showing that sheās never done any caregiving in her life) continues to make me second guess how close I can really be with this friend. Friend is coming back from a multi week cruise, of course.Ā
-I am working way too many hours, with not enough support. I have too many responsibilities. When I express this, it becomes my task to hire people to help me, which is just another morass of tasks out of which I will never climb.
-Today I spent a lot of the day being yelled at by different stakeholders. Many of their points were legitimate. At one point, I got to drive to a different location to be yelled at in a new place, so that provided some novelty.Ā
-I am very, very tired. Tired in a wake-up-tired and nothing-feels-enjoyable sort of way.
-We are going to the beach soon (I will be working through the trip and we are going with family) and going to lovely wifeās country of origin later this summer (staying with her family, seeing her family, more family has invited themselves on the trip - family family family).
-I get these thoughts like - when will lovely wife and I even have time to cook and garden and enjoy our new house if our lives are always revolving around our families of origin? Is the future just my mother in law and mom in my kitchen, fighting with each other?Ā Getting told off by my mother in law for working on my own home repairs instead of helping her with hers?
-A relative mailed me a new guitar. I was a little bit excited, not too much given the whole too-tired-to-enjoy-anything problem, but when I told my mom she managed to turn it entirely about her and how no one cares about her and itās not fair that people care about me. Cool.Ā