ASOIAF tiktok: omg maera and yassaerys are so cute together ! abusive grandfather/step-granddaughter is the ship dynamic of the year

ASOIAF twitter: DNI if you read books with m*rder or inc*st in them

daenerys and missandei, moon and sun

Tywin Lannister- despite hanging out in Harrenhal for a hot sec, I must concede that it was not the Riverlands that got him. He got got by The Cycles. Many would say “Oh he got killed by the Harrenhal curse” and while that was in the water, it was not what killed him. Blaming Harrenhal for Tywin is like blaming your prostate cancer for a gunshot. Separate issue.

Tyrion & Cersei- Cersei and Tyrion have definitely been to the Riverlands but evidently they’ve been quick enough about it that they’ve never been caught by it. Don’t worry, though. The Cycles are coming.

Ned Stark- passed through the Riverlands multiple times, seemingly without issue. Fell victim instead to the Stark variant of Task 1- “never go south”, “and definitely don’t go TWICE”, “and CERTAINLY you must never go to King’s Landing if you can possibly help it!!”, “(that place is full of wickedness!! Better to stay at home instead and prepare for winter)”, “(for real, though. Do you know how many beets you have? Go check.)”.

Sansa Stark- an interesting case where her dog/the sacred manifestation of her soul in the form of a very sweet dinosaur puppy/etc was murdered, and this seems to have been enough for Sansa to escape the Riverlands unimpeded. Thus far she has avoided re-engaging with it by traveling via boat. Compare with Arya, whose soul dog survived and is now roaming the Riverlands, thus tying Arya back to the Riverlands on top of spending two books there. Unfortunately, Sansa has fallen victim to the same blunder as her dad (see above), but I’m holding out hope for her.

Walda Frey Bolton- Walda Frey, displaying more circumspection than any of her relatives, has employed the ingenious tactic of marrying out of the Riverlands. Thus far, it seems to be working. Her other relatives who’ve gone north have not met with her level of success! But! WATCH THIS SPACE. As we know, marrying out did not save Catelyn. Returning home is highly unadvisable. Also, Walda married Roose Bolton, which puts her in the immediate orbit of Ramsay, who is not noted for his kind treatment of innocent women

Aegons 4&5- okay I don’t remember off the top of my head whether 4egon ever actually went to the Riverlands but I’m assuming he did because at least three of his mistresses that I can remember were from there. 4egon actually dodged basically every curse hurled at him it’s quite impressive. Egg, meanwhile, definitely did go to the Riverlands and even married a Riverlander! And he didn’t get killed by the Riverlands at all! Just, you know. The Targaryen prophecy bullshit. Still, good job guys 👍

Betha and Aly Blackwood (accepting nomination on behalf of all the Riverlander ladies who’ve successfully escaped by marrying out, not that there are many)- these two are historical examples of the Walda/Cat strategy: if you marry out of the Riverlands, you might just escape it. This is a big gamble, as Cat’s case demonstrates how it can horribly backfire on you. But, to the best of my knowledge, Betha and Aly’s eventual deaths had nothing at all to do with the Riverlands, probably inspiring many little Riverlanders to do the same 🖤 role models!

Gregor Clegane- despite pillaging the Riverlands, setting up shop in the black hole of Harrenhal, and later dying, I do begrudgingly have to give the Mountain his due by saying that his death was not the Riverlands’ fault. Interestingly, despite not actually being a Lannister, he’s actually very clearly under a Lannister-type curse of The Cycles, and as we’ve established, that’s a whole different kettle of fish

Bloodraven and Bittersteel- actually. You know what, I’m not actually sure that these two idiots have cleared it. Bloodraven and Bittersteel did escape the physical sphere of influence of the Riverlands by going as far north and east as it was possible to go, respectively. However, 1) they got into a Blackwood v Bracken feud which is one of the classic Riverlands sinkholes right after Harrenhal and I don’t know that they ever got out of that, and 2) apparently we don’t know where the Redgrass Field was?? And if it’s technically in the Riverlands then I’m afraid they did NOT clear the task because these two are stilllllll there. Yes, that’s right, dead-ass Bittersteel is stiiiiillllll there and tree-ass Bloodraven is DOUBLE still there. George I need to know these thingsssss.

Nettles- the one, the only, the peerless and matchless Nettles, rider of Sheepstealer, who was shacked up in Maidenpool (Riverlands) with Daemon T for a hot minute, and unlike him, she got clear free of the Riverlands and fucked off forever!! Never got caught and never looked back!!!!! That’s how it’s done!!!!!!!!!!

👑 Howland Reed- now HERE is a man who knows how to avoid a malevolent curse. “But Vi!” you may be saying, “Howland is clearly still affected by the Tourney! Just like the rest of his generation!” Ah, but there you’d be mistaken! Howland Reed’s experiences with Harrenhal have not gotten him killed, unlike everyone else in the Rebellion generation, which suggests to me that Howland used the whole Harrenhal thing as a kind of inoculation against the Riverlands. Either that, or being from the Neck gives you a natural advantage. Either way! Employed canoe travel.

- George R. R. Martin

quote: source