rose

you know people make fun of ned for claiming that 3 year old rickon is too old to be scared of direwolves, but I bet he was even worse with baby jon. I mean at least the other kids had catelyn to balance his parenting out, but jon only ever had ned for emotional support. like imagine newborn jon crying because he’s hungry or tired or something, and ned just picks him up, looks him straight in the eye, and imparts one of his classic Starkisms™ to him like 😐 “you’re too old for this now, jon. no more tears. we’re not in dorne anymore. you are a child of the north, and in the winter your tears will freeze on your cheeks and explode in your eyeballs and kill you violently. end this mummer’s farce while you still can.” and then eight-week-old jon immediately shuts the fuck up and never cries again (ned gives him a little forehead kiss as a reward). anyway this is why jon is Like That.

Dunk and Egg Harrenhal Halloween Episode. and scene. Egg tries to swim to the isle of faces and has to get fished out by a pretty fisherman’s daughter because Dunk can’t remember if he knows how to swim. Comes out with a cool rock that Dunk immediately throws back into the God’s Eye, threatening to clout him on the ear. He does not clout Egg on the ear. An old old man tells Dunk he dreamed of him, and that his dreams come true because his mother was a witch and that he should watch out because he dreamed of a big bat descending on him to kill. Recurring bit where Dunk is about to eat whatever people meat pie the Lothstons are serving up but keeps getting interrupted. An old woman Egg meets once who no one else can corroborate the existence of tells him there’s a dragon egg in the basement. He gets lost looking for it and only gives up when the walls start screaming at him. Dunk and some rivermen are getting paid to shore up the inner walls but it takes forever because people keep disappearing. Eventually they accidentally break into a sealed-off room filled with gnarled, burnt-out skeletons. No one can recall when they’re from. Danelle Lothston notices that Duncan the tall is tall, gives him some of the good wine, and is like come over for dinner tomorrow ;) Dunk gets spiked with the crazy blood potion and there’s a freaky weirwood dream sequence involving no fewer than 2 summerhall foreshadowings and 3 bear and the maiden fair references. Danelle Lothston is fixing to eat Dunk the next day but right as she’s about to get him alone Egg comes out like SER DUNCAN I SAW A GHOST. It looked like a WOMAN COVERED IN BLOOD she was wandering the halls near the dungeons and the kitchen. Dunk threatens to clout him on the ear because that’s not real. Lady Lothston is like actually look at the time I’ve got to go and it looks like you do, too. Dunk gets smacked in the head by a bat he didn’t see nesting in the hallway and thinks it’s a ghost for a second. Egg laughs at him. Dunk threatens to clout him on the ear. He does not clout Egg on the ear. Punchline at the end where on their way out Dunk finally gets to eat dinner and is wow like the high lords have everything and yet they’re also serving the same kind of pork that we eat in flea bottom. Queer.