alice🌱

Day 154

Wednesday was a busy busy and sweet day.

Spent time with Malobi gisting and smoking and eating.

I loved it!

I talked about Ogo and how I felt about her.

About how her existing shows me how what I was asking my ex for was really bare minimum.

😂

So that's how J and I were gisting and told me of how she showed my ex a photo of hers that I commented on saying “Chaotic Babe”

This babe of mine said to J “she should come fuck the chaos out of me”

Me - I laughed and said to J to tell her that she is not serious and she's a naughty girl.

Day 153

Today, my staff annoyed the heck out of me and I am strongly considering letting someone go.

Im so tired of repeating the same thing.

To demonstrate my annoyance, I assigned a task that f invoice review and processing. I gave this staff member all she required.

Tell me why she set up a meeting with me to ask me the SAME QUESTION THAT I HAD ALREADY ANSWERED ON THE SHEET SHE USES.

I almost pulled my hair out of my skull.

Day 152

She came over and we watched the Perfect Match S1 which is one of her favourite TV shows and seasons of that TV show.

I know she likes plantain, canned Fanta and puff puff and S1 of the Perfect Match.

I told her I liked her. She blushed. I told her I liked her more than a friend. She said she’s still heartbroken but she likes how I cared for her over the weekend.

I stopped her and said that she didn’t have to start anything. I can’t date, and I am celibate so it’s not sexual.

I must tuck my feelings in and show up as a purely platonic entity. It is possible. And she really needs a friend. I’ll connect with someone else.

Day 151

My skin is breaking out because of me. I have been going to bed tired and not showering.

I knew I would pay for it and hear we are. Gotta stop that habit.

I took a photo of myself so I could see how I looked as I stared at Ogo while she was simply existing.

Day 150

I was out till past 4am.

Shout out to Folu for the drop off. I had work from 7am.

How I did it is beyond me. But I did it anyway.

Day 148

I felt so sexy today

I felt like myself fully and truly

I had an amazing time

A wonderful time

I felt so cool

I felt free

I wasn’t performing

I was being

I like Ogo

Damn

I could not stop staring at her all through the evening

She’s so pretty

But her heart is broken

She needs her time to heal

Day 148

The first day of class was perfect.

They were happy to learn and not be overwhelmed.

Living in Obodo, my take away is that I am not gay enough. My home needs to be gayified.

I need more homo in my home.

Day 147

A fun day out and about in Lagos. Lagos during a public holiday is perfect cause the city is calm.

I’m nervous but excited about the first class tomorrow.

I walked and smoked and drank and had a 2hr 30 minutes conversation about art.

I’m pleased.

Day 146

I genuinely believe that everything works together for our healing and restoration.

Look at how pretty baby girl is.

I’m running low on energy and not sleeping well.

So so tired but this class and all it has brought up within me is worth it.