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***this is very long and you dont have to read it. I just couldnt sleep until I got it out***
Kobe Bean Bryant, his daughter Gianna, and 7 others died Sunday morning in a helicopter crash. It was shocking and tragic news that saddened so many people in the city of Los Angeles, the country and the world. While I was watching the coverage of the day’s tragic events it was staggering to see the impact that Kobe had. Not just in the basketball world, players in different sports, in different countries all felt the need to pay tribute, all felt the need to address this moment. So did, politicians, reporters, fans, priests, mayors, school districts and teachers all with their own stories of how a basketball player affected their lives. So many emotions hit me and took a long time to process. I began to think of the enormity and reach of Sports as an entity and its importance to both our society and myself.
I love sports of all kinds. From early on my father and brothers made sure that I not only followed all our local teams but also knew how to play the big three(baseball, basketball, and football) at multiple positions. Sports and games are how I learned to interact with the world.
My father explained to me that there were reasons to enjoy sports beyond just enjoying the games. He said that first and foremost there is a pride a city can take in its sports teams. The pride was that these people would play for you and regardless of the outcome (mostly negative when I was growing up a Dodger fan in the 90s), the pride was in the effort given by the players and fans alike. Secondly, sports worked as an introduction to geography. Since every major city in the US had some sort of sports team I would gradually gain an appreciation for where these cities and states were located, what time zones there were in, and usually something important about the cities (New York had wall street and finance, Chicago was the windy city and had a mix of agriculture, banking and industry, Detroit had the automobile industry, etc...) Lastly, he told me that it was very easy to strike up a conversation with a stranger if they had an interest in sports. It was important that I be well-rounded and be able to hold myself in a conversation with almost anyone. So in addition to history, science, current events and religion I studied sports.
Sports are weird. At their core they are games. Games with silly rules and equipment that we take very seriously. All around the world and throughout history something about sport makes it more than the sum of its parts.
I think I have said it once before that at its most heightened state sport possess the ability to make concrete the abstract. When we are young our parents, teachers, and caregivers try to instill in us certain values such as courage, discipline, industriousness, determination, toughness, leadership and cunning. What sports does so well is that in its greatest moments allows us a shorthand to explain what these values mean. You can point to Jackie Robinson and say that’s courage, you can point to Kobe making it back to the finals after losing to the Celtics and say that's what determination looks like, you can point to Peyton Manning studying film for hours after everyone has gone home and say that it was industriousness looks like. In a moment you explain these abstract concepts and ideals and make it into concrete examples of individual greatness. The examples then inpire so many to do great things in their own life.
Michael Davies from The Men in Blazers says that Sports offers the ability for us spectators to feel the gamut of human emotion in the safest of ways. Depending on the situation you could feel the depths of despair(Bengals), jubilance of victory(Lakers and Kings) and everything in between(Dodgers). It is a sentiment that I completely agree with. I remember in the 96-97 season seeing Kobe and Shaq play at the Great Western Forum with my father. I remember the awe I felt, the wonder, the elation of them winning and the contentedness on the drive home. Years later I remember being in Dodger Stadium in June and standing in the smoking section with 200 other fans because that was where the TVs were and someone had turned them onto the NBA Finals. I remember the game ending and the Lakers winning, I remember the joy and pride, I remember the sound of cheers disperse through the crowd as we ran out shouting out the results to anyone who would listen. There was sadness when Shaq and Kobe split up. There was frustration in the years after Kobe left. But perhaps the greatest emotion that sports elicits in us is hope. The hope that this year everything can change the hope that this game could be won and the hope that we will all witness something truly amazing.
Something I realized today when I thought about Kobe is that one of the other things sports does is create memories. Not just of watching greatness develop and grow. Not just in the 81 point game, or the 2010 finals against the Celtics, or all the countless memories of the Shaq and Kobe era. Every time I think of a favorite moment, I was watching the game with my family, friends or fans who loved or hated the Lakers. I think that's why this loss is so personal for so many. Growing up in this city, and growing up a laker fan meant Kobe was a point of civic pride. He played basketball for the Lakers sure but that meant he played for us. As a result of the extreme success, his teams would enjoy the Lakers also gave people bragging rights when they were down. Allowed a point of unity between the wide swath of fans in the city. Allowed for conversations at lunch between friends inquiring if they saw the amazing thing Kobe did last night. Most simply Kobe made fond memories for so many of us.
Sports make it so people want to come together to see something great, to feel something intense and to share in new memories with those who also gather to watch. Kobe’s greatness made it so that we sports fans wanted to gather more often to create more memories as we witnessed what he could do on a basketball court. Even after everything I wrote It does feel odd that through my love of sports I have such gratitude for a man I never met and sorrow at his untimely passing. Thank you, Kobe.
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I was looking over a lot of my post from years ago. The weird thing is for as angsty and poorly written so many are there is an underlining thread of optimism throughout everything. No matter how upset I was or how depressed I always hoped that I could get better, I hoped that the world could get better. I know this is a perfect setup for a cynical joke about how I was wrong or dumb but that's not what this post is about.
I still believe, in myself, in others, in America, in the idea that improvement is possible and necessary. I’ve struggled and I’ve failed. I will continue to struggle and fail. It's okay. The thing I need to do is to be kind to myself and others.
The entire world is full of wonders great and small. I need to remember that.
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I haven’t really posted about the terrorist attack this weekend. I mean what is there to say? Actual Nazis, fascist, and white supremacist came to protest the taking down of a statute of a man who waged an open war of rebellion against the country whose freedom that they claim to love. They came armed with riot shields, guns, and clubs all the while carrying flags of sworn enemies of the united states. They came for a fight and that’s what they did. And In the aftermath, once these horrendous wretches had left. An evil and vile man drove his car into a crowd of peaceful protestors and killed an American citizen. Two more police officers would die in a crash. Three Americans killed.
I am so deeply hurt by the attack that took place. It should be obvious to say that the man who perpetrated this heinous act is a terrorist and the act itself is a terrorist attack. But, sadly and incomprehensibly it is something that needs to be stated. The method and the motive of this attack is an obvious one of terror. There was no doubt when similar attacks occurred in France and in England. There is no doubt here.
I want to make this clear I expected nothing from Trump on Saturday and that’s what he delivered. His statement was feeble and feckless it was just a confirmation of the deep streak of cowardice and narcissism he is so infamous for.
3 Americans lost their life in a terrorist attack and the aftermath that followed. It took 48 hours for the President to respond. And yes, it was insincere and too little and too late but if he left it at that. If he just shut up and took the lumps I could have lived with it. I could have said the man has a 34% approval rating he can’t risk alienating the base he cultivated by denouncing them. I would have understood it as selfish move made from greed and fear and of the most disgusting calculus of pure self-preservation. I would not have forgiven it but, I could have at least understood the move.
But, today, today this pathetic excuse for a man could not contain himself. He had to give that press conference. He needed to get up there and double down. Today, he drew a line in the sand and stood with Nazis, white supremacist, bigots, racist, cowards and Scum. He is so terribly afraid of being wrong that he, the President of the United States of America drew a moral equivalency between actual Nazis and people protesting them. Watching that press conference today was such a surreal experience, it was all at once gut wrenching, infuriating, stunning, and heart breaking. His words were so abhorrent, so loathsome, so despicable, and so entirely Anti-American it struck me to my core. I do not know if English has a word to properly convey my horror and repulsion at this man. He is unworthy of respect, he is unworthy of any benefit of the doubt and he is unworthy of the trust and faith of the American people. Donald Trump as President, as an American, and as a man is an abomination.
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