Actual Lesbians

list of things she does when i take a nap -brushes eyebrows with spoolie -pimple popping -combs hair -combs baby hairs -combs baby hairs into specific shapes -moisturises my skin -puts the little face patches on the cheekbones on me -chapstick i saw two siamangs at the zoo picking nits off eachother and it reminded me of her lmao we're all just apes at the end of the day

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I told my girlfriend I love her for the first time, and she said it back!! It’s so hard to believe that during this time last year I was crying almost everyday over my unhappy long-term relationship with a man and questioning my sexuality. It really does get better :)

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Felt like posting but will delete later🤷‍♀️

I’m def not the type to post themselves but I just wanted to try it out.

I haven’t done any calisthenics in months but I’m looking to get back into it. This is like a before picture and I’ll post again after a month and a half for more progress 😛

I know beauty is subjective but I’m very curious. Rate me 1 out of 10🧐

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Wink wink

Next time when I get my nails done and ask to have those two fingernails cut shorter than the rest, I get the strangest looks. Then all I have to do is wink at them

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Hey everyone. Hoping you all can help me.

I fell in love (deeply) with my straight best friend. We are close coworkers (spend 60+ hours a week with each other usually) for the last 2 and a half years. After MONTHS of confusing interactions between us. Lots of touching, flirting, massages, etc, I felt like I couldn’t hold it in anymore and told her. She has a long term boyfriend of 8 years and they have SERIOUS problems in their relationship. I had a feeling she was using me as a placeholder for the emotional intimacy and closeness she doesn’t get from him, and also felt like I started to realize the feelings were reciprocated. When she started telling me she had sex dreams about us “but wouldn’t tell her boyfriend!,” I knew I was right.

Two months ago I told her. She told me she loved me back. Told me she was going to leave her boyfriend, all of these things. Then suddenly flip flopped. Then flip flopped again. It’s been two months of this. Now it “committed to trying to make it work with her boyfriend.” We work together. It’s excruciatingly painful. She told coworkers “I told her I loved her,” but didn’t tell them she did too. Work has become miserable.

Today, I finally told her we need to go no contact. I told her she needs to look at new jobs. I cannot handle the flip and flop. She tells me she loves me and that “she’s felt more alive with me than with her boyfriend ever,” but then chooses him. I don’t even think it makes sense for us to date, but I cannot stand her boyfriend. He does not treat her well. I cannot fathom that he gets his millionth try at the expense of my heart and feelings.

Everyone is telling me to stick it out. It’s hard to make friends as adults. Especially friends as close as we once were. But I can’t do it. I can’t move on when I’m trying to keep it light and cute for work.

Did I do the right thing? Please say yes. I’m drowning inside.

A few notable replies:

TheLacticAcids: Of course you did the right thing. She liked you attention but was never going to choose you yet she still played you.

3PottsAndPans3: She needs to understand that you’re a human being and not just someone she can get with when convenient. It really is hard to find people with that close of a connection but because of the fact that she flip flopped she is putting you in an uncomfortable position, along with your other coworkers for that matter. I’m so sorry you’re in this position, you deserve better 🫂

Spinningsoda: What a shitty move. Regardless of what was/is happening on their relationship, you should have never confessed and respected that she is not single. Let her move out from that relationship on her own, ffs. There's a lot of people out there. The moment you felt an attraction, you should have distracted yourself because again, respect that she is in a relationship-- LONG TERM.

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A while ago, I had expressed that in forming a bit of a weird relationship with my desire for romantic intimacy to the point where I wish I could destroy that need altogether. Thanks to everyone for letting me vent, it was really kind of y’all to validate my feelings on such a dramatic topic.

There were a few comments, however, that kind of annoyed me. They suggested putting those feelings into other avenues of my life, like friendship and hobbies. I know they meant well and were sharing advice they thought would help. Here’s the thing, though: I am completely fulfilled in those other avenues of my life. I have the greatest friends that a woman could ever ask for. They’re my found family. I have plenty of hobbies that I do to keep me happy and occupied. I’m pursuing a well paying career. Things are finally aligning for me.

And yet, none of these things could ever replace that desire for romantic intimacy. Yes, they help to dull the ache into something more manageable, but it doesn’t stop it altogether. I still want to share my love and affection with someone else. I can be fulfilled and still want love.

I think what makes it even harder for me to handle these feelings is the fact that I’ve never been in a relationship. I’m 26 years old and YES I know I have more time, do NOT comment that, I already know, but I feel like I’m just nobody’s first choice. I try my best to meet potential partners halfway, only to get ghosted, say I’m not what they’re looking for, or just strung me along until they found someone better in their eyes. And it hurts a lot, you know?

So, yeah. I am fulfilled in almost every avenue of my life, but that doesn’t mean I’m not feel bitter about having zero experience when it comes to relationships. I think it’s okay to feel that way.

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Becoming strong so that I can lift my gf

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I’m horny tonight, browsing some gifs, and some of my favorites are the ones where they’re making out and then start rubbing each other.

What’s going through your mind in those moments? I’ve never had the chance to be intimate with anyone before, but I imagine it’s like you just feel so aroused and want her to feel it, too?

The more details the better. I want to be able to feel what you felt.

What people on Reddit said:

LawyerKangaroo: The funniest thing is nothing happens in my brain, it switches off. I am only there to please the ladies.

WiserVortex: I enjoy the power trip I get from feeling how wet she is for me 😈

Mimikyu_Lov3r: Idk about everyone else but I very much love giving pleasure to my gf and making her feel loved

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Women who have dated men or had experiences with men in the past, what made you realise you were actually a lesbian?

What people had to say on Reddit:

Beebzette: When I realized that I was attracted to literally every woman but only extremely extremely feminine men. It turns out i'm repulsed by masculinity

ShayJayLee: When I realized that straight women actually want to be in the presence of men and enjoy their company without forcing themselves. All the men whose company I enjoyed were like brothers to me. I also realized that hair does most of the heavy lifting of making a man look good. So what I thought were crushes were actually just me discovering in masc and wanting to look like them.

Charcoal98222: I get the feeling of wanting to escape the interaction.

Supernaturalb00322: When they started talking about "our" future together. I just never pictured it. Also I never had sexual attraction to men.

Les-Layla89: When I divorced my husband. I found comfort in the arms of another woman afterwards and never looked back since

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Seriously, I’m a masculine woman and I would say in about 70% of my interactions with other lesbians, they assume my pronouns as they/them rather than just asking me what my pronouns are (personally, I always ask people if I don’t know). And then when I tell them I actually use she/her, they always go back to using they/them for some reason. This doesn’t happen to my feminine friends.

It’s honestly sad because this is supposed to be the community that most accepts me for being a masculine woman, but they can not bring themselves to see me as a woman.

Automatically giving a label of non-binary to anyone who does not fit society’s strict views on what a woman should look like is disrespectful to masc women and trans women

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Thought I slayed my cosplay of a girlie girl untill I got called out as a weeb by some random teenage boys on the street for speaking my mother tongue

Also, how do you add volume on your lower eye part without making yourself look sick? I like to use a brush with some small sparkles when it comes to photos but trying to draw something on my undereye with eyeshadow or an eyeliner in real life just comes out so waird

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So my partner recently moved in with me because she said she wanted to, and now she's being increasingly abelist. I have had mobility issues for a little while, and I'm AudHD. She seems to think I'm just lazy. I was recently prescribed a handicapped placard for my car and have been walking with a cane because it's much easier. I played sports for a while, and my body just stopped recovering when I got older, so I'm in retired athlete land, and my body is pretty beat. I also used to work concerts and big live shows, which was very physical work. I used to be really fit and active, and my body just can't anymore. I'm not sure why, but as I've been asking my partner for help, she has been increasingly mean. During pride, she kept asking me to hurry up and telling me I was walking too slow, with my cane. I feel like I got older and slower, and she's done with me now. It feels awful. I'm having trouble keeping up with housework, too. I'm making really decent money and offered to pay for a cleaner, but she says that won't replace me showing up. I'm getting really worried that the concept of sickness and health is not her. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. We have a good life. We go to women's sports events and play D&D together. I was even inspired to DM because of her. I'm so sad. She gets big mad about having to do the dishes and take out the trash. Basic stuff that I used to do more when I could. I don't know what to say to her. I have tried asking for help and talking about how I'm feeling. She knows about the cane and the placard. I'm thinking I should just let her go. The mortgage is in my name, I pay all the bills. We aren't married. She wanted to get married, but now I think it's a really bad idea. We've been dating for a few years now, and she wasn't like this before she moved in full time. She's not abelist with friends. Is there something that I could be doing better? She's out of work, and I don't think she can afford to move out. I want her to stay but not if she's unhappy.

Some notable replies:

Sockthenshoe: You’re not doing anything wrong, she is. You deserve someone who is kind and patient.

Ashling90: She wanted to move in, but it's your house, and you pay for everything? That alone is a red flag to me. I'm sure she has good qualities, but if she can't even talk to you about your needs as a disabled person, I'm not sure she is a good fit. Either way, I absolutely think you should get a cleaner if you can. Don't overexert yourself if you don't have to.

Summer_d85: Sounds like you know what to do already…..it’s just gonna suck. You can’t be their crutch in life, you have to do what’s best for you and your mental health.

ToxikaTWITCH: Well good on you for expressing everything to her first, and even good-er for you having her move in BEFORE marriage. You already said you think you need to let her go. Once you seriously start considering that, realistically it’s time to do it. Save for intrusive thoughts, these considerations only come around when you’ve exhausted options, trust has been broken, and the flame is gone. It’s hard, it sucks. If you really want to test it, go on a vacation or take a few days alone to yourself. If your life feels so much easier, your mind much clearer, and your heart much fuller, it’s time.

TheLacticAcids: Please get rid of her. She is being ableist and disrespecting you and sees you as less than her. It's not just about the housework because if it was, she would have accepted a cleaner. Kick her ass out onto the street because I promise you she isn't going to change.

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Am I attractive?

I’m 18 btw and only one girl has ever liked me before

What people on Reddit said:

Cat_cant_think: You're gorgeous!!!

Major_Maximum_9724: I found you very attractive.

Smooth_Salad541: you're beautiful :)

No-Material5356: You're a whole magnet, girly!

National_sillyguy: beautiful :D

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If you stayed with your long term husband/boyfriend after realising you’re a lesbian (or might be) I’m curious, why did you stay? What are your thoughts now?

Ps. I’m not asking from a place of judgment, I’m just questioning myself a lot right now and would really appreciate hearing others’ experiences 💜

Some notable replies:

UnshelteredGardener: I stayed in my marriage for about ten years after I realized I could no longer ignore my own truth. The first two years were all about my own internal reckoning, and then I came out as bisexual to my spouse and my family. I didn't think I was actually bisexual, but it seemed like the least disruptive thing I could say. And then I spent the remaining eight years trying everything I could think of to make it work. I just couldn't face leaving and upsetting people. I was used to being unhappy, so I thought I could just carry on that way. It eventually got very dark, and my physical health started failing. I was 61, and realized that just hoping some day things would change was quickly becoming impossible. Now or never became very real. I left my marriage two years ago this month, and fully came out as a lesbian. It did upset and shock some people, but they're OK. My ex is OK. I felt as though I was saving my own life. The people who really love me have been happy for me, and oddly, almost none of them were actually surprised. And best of all, I got my "some day" and have found the sort of love I never thought I could have.

Zizazooble: Many reasons. He is a great person, we have a neurodivergent child who can’t handle any change of routine, we make a great team. Houses in my area are extremely expensive and I could never afford to live alone. Also, I don’t know that I would be able to even find a woman, didn’t even manage that when I was younger and in great shape. My partner knew from the start I was into women and he accepted that. I know it’s difficult to explain why I chose him, but he really is perfect on paper, it’s not his fault I don’t feel butterflies.

EfficiencyOk8681: I’m also interested to hear any stories. At this moment, I’m working through the staying process because we have done so much work and counseling, our foundation feels so solid. We have made financial decisions around being partnered. We have children. I am not sure where this will take us over time but we both settled into attempting to figure it out.

Winonaenergy: I’m still married because I can’t afford a divorce. Our romantic relationship has been over for years. We haven’t even slept in the same room in over a decade. The job market is impossible but I’m still trying to get a job so I can start my own life, it’s just a really hard time to do that with a 15 year resume gap. He knows I’m a lesbian and it’s definitely not a “he’s my best friend and we make a great team” situation. We have disabled kids and I have to be able to make enough money to support myself and at least part of their care myself before I can leave.

JRB710: No where else to go. I stay home with my daughter and have for years so no income of my own. I'm an only child and both my parents are gone. I'd be homeless if I left.

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To the girl who awoke my praise kink - you the real MVP

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Fifty shades of black honestly 🥴

What people on Reddit said:

Coffeebi17: Fabulous!🫶🏼🧡🤍🩷🫶🏼

324aspirin: I'm stealing your wardrobe, so chic!

Clg19929: You look simply stunning 🫠

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I 25F ended a 4 month relationship with my ex girlfriend about a month ago. I’m honestly really proud of myself. She was becoming increasingly more insecure, anxious, controlling, and volatile. I finally broke my cycle of staying in relationships I didn’t enjoy and were horrible for me. I’m a little sad, because it was the first time I dated a woman after coming out in general and accepting the fact I am lesbian to myself after all of these years of repressing it out of shame and fear. I’m planning on staying single for a while in order to heal, work out things with my sexuality (like why I wasn’t able to come out for so long), etc in therapy, which I was already in. So that the next time I want to date or meet someone, I don’t attract unhealthy people.

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