Actual Lesbians

hi girlies!!! i've been seeing a tgirl for a couple of weeks and she's coming over tomorrow. we had sex a couple of times, but no penetration (besides fingers). she promised me she'd finally fuck me tomorrow, and said that she wanted me to strap her down too, which we had previously discussed but very briefly. the thing is i've never fucked anyone in the ass before. i'd like to know if you guys got any tips on how to do that, how to find The spot, just overall how to do it well so i can please her. thank youuu

Some standout replies:

Commercial_Middle182: Bottom prep would be her part. On your end just use lots of lube, more than you think is necessary, and take it slow, communicate. As for hitting the spot, you're trying to hit the inside of her genitals from the butt, if that makes sense. So if she was on her stomach you're trying to gently press down, but not necessarily all the time as it could be overwhelming.

ImperatorPolonia: Always good to state the obvious but(t), as previously mentioned, there is no such thing as "too much lube" when talking about anal". You might also want to use a condom on your strap if you intend to use it on other people later down the line. Every body is a bit different, but usually having her on her back with a small cushion on her lower back might just do the trick. When you start going inside of her for the first time, be gentle, be slow, allow herself to relax and accommodate the toy before fucking her senseless. Hope it helps, have fun! ^^

Monkey_gamer: Ah don't stress about it. You don't need to get it perfect from the start. You'll figure it out.

TwoTrucksPayingTaxes: I'd ask how experienced she is and what she usually needs to warm up. I love anal but can't just jump into an actual dildo without fingers first. Some people can skip fingers as long as they're turned on enough. I'd also consider using the dildo with your hand, rather than attaching it to a harness the first time. There's more control that way

MarsupialNo1220: Lots of water based lube and take it slowly. Insert slowly, start your thrusts slowly at first, and withdraw slowly once done. Before using the dildo it’s probably a good thing to try a couple of fingers and engage in some foreplay to make sure she’s ready. And definitely don’t go from ass to vagina. Vagina to ass is fine, but ass to vagina is a recipe for infections.

View on Reddit

Outfit for my state’s fair

Decided my outfit Would be food themed since I was eating lots of fun food at the state fair!

View on Reddit

I’m in my 20’s and have just been feeling a lack of community in my life. I’m aware there’s clubs/bars, but I just don’t feel safe going to them on my own (especially at night).

Anyone located in/around the NYC area know of any groups/activities a young (mostly broke) lesbian could do to find some community?

A few replies that stood out:

Joylar7: I’m down to go!

Holographicteeth: I’d be down as well ! I know this month the new york public library hosted an event for those of wlw in brooklyn. couldn’t go but I’d be on the lookout on eventbrite, insta, or tiktok because that’s where I’ve been able to know about them !

Hmmhmmhuhmmm3: Lmk when you find out too but I’m in my early 30s

View on Reddit

Dating apps suck and I’m pretty much done with them so I’d love to hear some stories from those of you who met your partners outside of them

Some replies that stood out:

Stabbymuffins: A03 she was a writer and I commented, then eventually dm'd and moved off onto Twitter... Then Whatsapp lol

Bluesond: The peace corps served with my wife

NerdyPrunesMustDry: My wife and I met through a roleplaying community on Twitter. Our characters fell in love and well, so did we lol.

Few_Huckleberry2755: algebra 2 🫰

Quirkyquipsters: Reddit Before that, a message board for a tv show

View on Reddit

I recently became good friends with this girl for 4 months already. We would occasionally cuddle. I'm F26 bisexual and she's F28 asexual.

I like it when she spoons me... As the headache I have constantly goes away. I'm guessing it is the release of oxytocin in the brain. I don't imagine myself having sex with her, dating or kissing her.

My question is.. is it perfectly normal for me to feel this way? Can a platonic relationship exist like this? I'm starting to doubt my intention for her. All I need is for my headache to go away and she has the key to that thing that I need the most.

Some comments that stood out:

Sixchambr: Probably but I don’t think I could do it without getting flustered lol

Top-Impact-5257: Yes

Sweetbabybonus: Certain straight friends and I will cuddle on the couch and such but as far as spooning in bed, no. It’s not weird if it works for you though.

Pincheloca1208: I couldn’t. It would feel awkward. At least for me.

TabbbyWright: Sure? It's gonna vary from person to person of course but it's clearly happening for you. Personally it's way too intimate for me to do with someone I'm not romantically interested in, but that's obviously not universal (though I suspect it's more common than not).

View on Reddit

Think I Glowed Up

I’ve been working on making better fashion choices since my baby masc days 🤣

View on Reddit

Day at the Wisconsin State Fair

Got to eat lots of amazing food, drink amazing drinks, watch some dog agility, and let lots of goats!!

View on Reddit

Need more friends

Hey everyone! 💕my name is Sevvy I’m 27F and a lesbian from kern county Cali, and I own a … 25+ for anyone who wants to hang out, chat, or game together! 🎮 It’s very marvel rivals/fortnite forward I have a PC and I’m always down to play something, but honestly I’m just as happy watching TV, anime, or spending hours drawing. 🎨📺 I’m currently in between jobs, and I’ve been trying to make more friends, so I figured I’d put myself out there and meet some new people! 🫶 If you’re looking for someone to game with, watch shows/anime with, or just chat and vibe with, feel free to reach out! 💗

View on Reddit

My Girlfriend has Tritanopia

Since my girlfriend has tritanopia, I realized she actually couldn't truly see the lesbian pride flag as the top and bottom look almost identical to her.

I tried to replicate the sunset flag but in such a way that it works for her eyes as she cant see purples, granted im sure its already a different identity lol

View on Reddit

Recommendations based off this tier list of sapphic books I've read?

Hey all! I'm starting to run out of sapphic books to read that I feel like I'd rate highly. I do still have some left on my shelves, and those are reflected as the unranked options on the second image. But I'd love to have some more to add to my collections if anyone has any suggestions :) or to hear if anyone feels really strongly about said unranked options!

Here are some replies:

Jaslyn--: safekeep and sunburn, no shelter but the stars, paying guests, tipping the velvet

SearScare: Don't want to give recommendations because I'm almost an inverse of you. Harrow, Baru and Time war re 5 stars for me. Meanwhile Jasmine Throne and Memory Called Empire are wanted to DNF for me. I think the part I agree with are also DNF-ing Turbulence and Criers war. I assume you've read the rest of EJ Noyes. Edit: just saw image #2. I think Ask, Tell is worth it! That series is the strongest one of hers IMO. A. Master of Djinn also pretty good! Here's two series that have stayed w me for different reasons. Neither are perfect but I think there is depth to the storytelling. - Senator Wife series - Clem & Wist

LesbianCanvas: Yerba Buena is so underrated. I liked that book a lot more than I anticipated.

CollateralDmg15Dec21: Try the few more from Alison Cochrun and TJR. Others: One Last Stop. Breaking from Frame. Sunburn. Truth and Measure.

CounterAgentVT: If you like Fingersmith, you should definitely give Tipping the Velvet a try.

View on Reddit

hello lesbians, i (23F) went back to therapy after a long time and decided to finally open up about my sexuality to my therapist (i live in a country where it’s illegal to be gay, and the sentencing for that is 7 years in prison iykyk ) my therapist is generally a kind man, he follows a developmental approach in therapy, he told me that gay guys come to him all the time and it’s “manageable” and then he told me about how one of his gay client got married to a woman cuz he wanted kids eventually in his lifetime even tho he’s not sexually attracted to women at all , he asked me if “i am willing to get fixed or not?” i told him i don’t think that’s possible, i will live a lie , i only have had sex w women, only dated women and only imagine being with women , even though my reality does not make that quite feasible, he pitched the idea of me marrying a man w no sex drive as a solution? he asked me if i am ever planning to have kids , my answer is “no”, he asked if i ever imagined myself as a mother, my genuine answer was “i already raised my younger siblings by myself i know i don’t want kids, i”ll never be what they need” idk but i left the session feeling very confused , ik i can trust him cuz he promised me that it’s a safe space, but at the same time i feel like i am in conversion therapy lowkey, he did say that my sexuality is not “typical” i felt hurt…i feel like he saw me as some sort of leper…i did ask him if that changed the way he sees me as a person, his answer was no i am eventually going to leave the country to study abroad but until then i am just working odd jobs and saving money so i can get out, idk if someone went through something similar? i would love to know how you got through that experience because it feels isolating , i am currently single, my ex gf cheated on me and i blocked her, so i literally have no one to talk to about this

Some replies that stood out:

Adventurous_Dot_9763: i'm so sorry, that sounds like a horrible experience. your sexuality is not something that needs "fixing." going to therapy takes a lot of vulnerability so to be met with that response must really suck. i wouldn't discuss sexuality with that therapist at all anymore. i hope you manage to get out soon!

American-stag-: I’m so sorry you have to deal with this. You are definitely in conversion therapy, high key, he’s saying it can be “fixed” etc. I know you’re in a tough situation if I were you I would just tell him you’re not interested in discussing your sexuality anymore and just stick to other topics in your life bc I mean, it’s not like you’re ever gonna hear anything good or helpful from him regarding that topic. That story about the gay guy is really sad. It’s sad for the man, and it’s sad for his wife that she is with someone who’s not attracted to her. I don’t understand why homophobic people do this stuff, it just leads to misery for everyone. If I lived in a country like that I’d move tbh. I’ve had my share of abuse from straight people, but I can’t imagine it being illegal to be gay. That really sucks.

Aescgabaet1066: "ik i can trust him cuz he promised me that it’s a safe space"... Girl, no. He promised you that but he is clearly not trustworthy when it comes to your sexuality. I would not bring it up again (tbh if you are able to, I'd definitely find a different therapist).

View on Reddit

I’m engaged to a woman that my tween kid adores, but there’s a slight problem. He keeps calling us both mum & it’s getting very confusing.

Love him to death but he’s definitely a shit stirrer, he calls out mum then becomes aloof as to who he’s calling out to. Also my fiancee loves the kiddo but feels like she’s taking away from me by being called mum (she’s not, but it’s not easing the feelings).

She’s not a fan of mama, ma, mommy etc (especially mommy as he’s a teenager & it’s weird lol) so does anyone have some creative alternatives?

Some notable replies:

Cherrylalaxo: Her name? Mimi? Do either of you know about your heritage backgrounds? Mutti is German, Ummi Arabic - lots of options there.

ContingentMax: I'd talk to the kid and find something with his input. Tween should be old enough to understand the situation.

Lesbiannerd27: I feel like people are missing the point of you both being/wanting to be mom/mother to the kid! Moms usually aren’t called by other family titles or first names I agree that you should talk to tween about thoughts and feelings on what is natural and appropriate to keep all parties happy. It may be that you find a common ground in a different language, agree on an option that you neglected previously, or go with something silly like Mum A and Mum B. parental figure (unit/person), birth giver, adopter, mothra, matriarch, folk(s), kin, female parent, majka, ahm, moeder, matre, mutter, madre, uma, ima

Iknewwhereyoupooped: I don’t think it’s something for you to choose. It’s something that he is comfortable with. Why not use her first name since he is already older? My youngest is 8 and I don’t see him ever calling someone else mom or ma no matter their relationship. Same with if they ever get a step mom. If he’s okay with it why change it for yall comfort.

Syder-fx: I planned on my future kids calling me Ami which sounds like mummy

View on Reddit

It’s Friday!! Let’s have a great weekend love you all 😊

View on Reddit

I speed dated 9 women and I felt like I clicked with 8 of them. They all seemed really cool and I wanted to get to know them better. So I hit yes for 8 out of 9, and I wondered if maybe I wasn’t being picky enough, but I didn’t really care.

The way the event was set up, you were paired with people who seemed compatible based on a survey we did before the event (with basic relationship stuff like are you interested in having kids, are you religious, are you into femmes/butches/etc) and then you vote yes or no after each short date. After the event was over you got notified if you had any matches. And I got… one. Which on the one hand is cool, because hey, I got a match! I hit it off with a woman. But on the other hand I can’t stop thinking about how 7 out of 8 people who I liked and had a really nice time talking to voted no on me.

I KNOW I shouldn’t be focusing on that, I should be focusing on the one person I actually matched with. But my self confidence when it comes to dating is already so low, this is really fucking with me. I’ve had really bad luck with relationships in the past and sometimes it’s hard not to feel like there’s just something about me that’s really unattractive that I can’t figure out but that seems obvious to everybody else.

I don’t even really know why I’m writing this or what I’m looking for here, I guess I just wanted to vent. I’m trying so hard to get out of my comfort zone and gain confidence in myself and this is giving me such conflicting feelings and I don’t really know what to do.

View on Reddit

So yesterday I drove 11 hours to spend 2 weeks with my girlfriend and let me tell you… meeting her in person for the first time and just being with her she is worth every mile that I drove and I’d do it again and again in a heartbeat 💝 I love her so deeply it’s crazy I never thought love like this even existed. She makes me the happiest I have ever been and I’m so happy I found her I’m never letting her go 😘

View on Reddit

I came out at 28 (5 years ago). Before that, I’d only been with men, and looking back I can see that a lot of the issues I had with sex were simply because I wasn’t attracted to them.

The one thing that didn’t change though, is that I’ve never enjoyed vaginal penetration. Not with men, not with women, toys, hands, whatever. It doesn’t hurt, I just don’t feel anything and makes me feel so so so weird. It is of course a boundary I always communicate with my partners.

But I’m yet to meet someone who feels the same way. Maybe it‘s because I came out almost in my thirties, but it does make me feel weird that apparently “everyone“ enjoys penetration but me.

I’m also very active in fandom spaces, and if it’s hard to find good quality wlw fanfics/fanart, it’s basically impossible to find something that is both sexual and with no mentions to penetration.

I’m not looking for advice on how to “fix” it, I don’t want it fixed. I’m genuinely asking if I’m part of a minority here 😅

A few notable replies:

Save_Canada: I dont enjoy receiving penetration. It's a boundary for me as well. Love giving it though

Shinmera: Same, wrote and illustrated comic about that, too. I can send it to you if you like.

ContingentMax: I find penetration fun it's ok, but it's never gotten me to orgasm. I was with some men before figuring out my sexuality too and my main feeling after was I could do better alone. Definitely doesn't make you less of a lesbian.

Usernames_suck_ok: Not interested in giving and definitely not interested in receiving. I could suck it up re: giving if it was ever going to matter again, but hell no re: receiving.

RejectZero: I'm the same way but I've never been with men and came out in high school. It definitely doesn't make you less gay at all. I actually never even thought of anyone feeling that way about it. I've never had an ex say anything about it to me so it didn't even occur to me that it was odd.

View on Reddit

Vel and Cinta in Andor 💔

SPOILER ALERT

I'm rewatching Andor and the relationship between Vel and Cinta touched me even more on the second viewing. Not sure why. Maybe because I already know the storyline and can focus more on the characters.

Their relationship is complicated and deep which really drew me in. There's nothing glossy, easy or cute here. It's two intelligent, passionate and committed women, trying to navigate conflicting views on life, love and the world.

It was so amazing to see them finally come together with a passionate kiss. But, oh the punch in the gut when Cinta dies is just visceral. It's a roller-coaster ride and I'm glad I watched it again.

That's it. Just wanted to share my thoughts on this.

View on Reddit