Horror enthusiast, blood enjoyer, onlooker of hairy men, and doesn't tag shit ever- so expect unsolicited artistic nudity, 80s body horror, and sometimes some edgy stuff on your dash. Big fan of men and the male form.
I'm a leather pup (my pup name is Spiky/Spike). BDSM/kink is a special interest of mine, and I work in a sex shop, so you'll see me talk about that on here. I also run my own sex toy/kink event review blog @spikyreviews
I love industrial metal, goth metal, post punk, and nu metal. Post grunge is cool too. Love gory horror films, the camper the better. If there's a man experiencing a mental breakdown even better. I love old video games, specifically horror games. I'm edgy, enjoy angst and dead dove shit, and I take things too seriously sometimes, so I'm often dumping big paragraphs about characters I like, and they're not always popular opinions.
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Genres: primarily heavy metal (industrial, nu, prog) with some new wave/post punk, art/prog rock and grunge thrown in for good measure.
Themes: The brutality of Walter's actions and his unnerving mannerisms; trauma induced regression; grieving a mother who never knew or wanted him; Jungian-esque splits of his being, and the canon-described bitterness and growing disdain for other people and the cult that indoctrinated him. The game alludes to themes of child abuse, both overtly violent and (subtextually) sexual in nature, as well as the religious institute of the cult as a breeding ground for such abuse- so those are strong themes I tried to capture as well. The songs in this playlist aim to touch on different aspects of his character respectively, so some have different moods to each other.
Art: done by me (art blog: @n0sebleeds )
Duration: approx 2.5 hours
Tracklist below (in no particular order, and with a couple of lyrics to add context):
Not Meant For Me- Wayne Static (of Static-X)
I'm trapped in this world // lonely and fading // heartbroke and waiting
Underneath My Skin- Jonathan Davis (of Korn)
Something's crawling underneath my skin, I fear // something's dying, rotting deep within
Jizzlobber- Faith No More
Bars in the womb // I hide my dirty minutes // under my dirty mattress // and they are making me itch
Nothing to Gein- Mudvayne
Mommy do you still live inside of me? // I'm so lost in my life without any guiding
Ragged Rise to Tumbledown- Lowlife
I know this child can grow no more // this child must leave of course
No more shall you burn my throat // or throw me to the ground (note: this song is about alcoholism, but I think it also really fits as a narrative about childhood trauma, esp CSA)
Jesus or a Gun- Fuel
It's safe to say, I don't desire // everything you push inside my head
No Way- Korn
So I'm angry for today // anger's the only thing I've made // it feels like something // no, it's nothing
The Emptiness Machine- Linkin Park
Gave up who I am for who you wanted me to be // don't know why I'm hoping, so fucking naive // falling for the promise of the emptiness machine
The Patient Mental- Mudvayne
The patient sits in cradled arms // that comfort me by strangling
Here to Stay- Korn
This state is elevating // as the hurt turns into hating
Down in a Hole- Alice in Chains
Bury me softly in this womb
Got The Life- Korn
God thanks me, they'll never see the light // didn't want us to see? // God told me, I've already got the life
THE CIELING UNDERGROUND- The Twilight Sad
So here comes your wee boy now // and why does he look so down? // The ceilings always underground // it's better if I'm not found
Forget It- Breaking Benjamin
It's a crime you let it happen to me // nevermind, I'll let it happen to you // I don't mind, forget it, there's nothing to lose // but my mind and all the things I wanted
-1 - Mudvayne
(Tell me!) what I'm supposed to be // (Tell me!) who I'm supposed to be // (Tell me!) what it takes to ascend // (Tell me!) what it takes to live
BACK TO FOURTEEN- The Twilight Sad
Mother may I lay down and die?
Fallback- Spineshank
Give me life, give me faith, give me something to see // give me love, give me hate, tell me what to believe
Meine Tränen- Rammstein
Ich leb' noch immer bei Mama // Und bleibe wohl für immer da
"I still live with my Mama // And probably will stay forever" (note: not literally relevant, but the themes of emotional/physical abuse and codependency on a mother fit imo)
Mama- Genesis
I can't see you Mama, but I can hardly wait // oh, to touch and feel you, Mama, I just can't keep away
Mother Stands for Comfort- Kate Bush
Mother Stands for comfort // Mother will hide the murderer (note: I like to take her use of the word 'Mother' to symbolically mean 'The Room')
"Curse desire // Condemn, Temptation //Promise damnation // They commit crime" (note: the translation isn't accurate, there's a lot of wordplay that gets lost. The song is criticising organised religion, including abuse and indoctrination)
Cradle- Mudvayne
Look what you've done to me // realise what you've done to me
Look at me now, a piece of shit like you // look at me now, you left me so fuck you
Terrible Lie- Nine Inch Nails
Don't tear it away from me, I need you to hold onto
Thoughtless- Korn
So you can try to tear me down // beat me to the ground // I will see you screaming
What Did You See?- Cemeteries
I will not be growing old here // I will not grow old
Hopeless- Breaking Benjamin
Safe to say it's over, sink into the grave // there's nothing left inside, but I am wide awake // I can hear the devil call my name
Dirty- Korn
I'm out here, by myself all alone // ready to blow my head off, I hurt so bad inside (note: this song is about CSA trauma)
Skrying- Mudvayne
Do you remember the bedroom? // Was it your cell or was it your tomb? (Note: another one about institutional abuse of children, be warned)
Mutter- Rammstein
Werf' in die Luft die nasse Kette // Und wünsch' mir, dass ich eine Mutter hätte
"I throw the wet chain into the air // And wish that I had a mother "
I'm So Sick- Flyleaf
You sink into my clothes // this invasion makes me feel // worthless, hopeless, sick
What Lies Beneath- Breaking Benjamin
So I find what lies beneath your sick twisted smile // as I lie underneath your cold jaded eyes
Hallelujah- Rammstein
Er liebt die Knaben aus dem Chor // Sie halten ihre Seelen rein
"He loves the boys in the choir // They keep their souls pure" (note: doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what this song is about)
Descent- Fear Factory
I feel nothing, I am nothing // how deep do I descend? // Until I reach my end?
Forgotten- Linkin Park
In the memory you'll find me // eyes burning up // the darkness holding me tightly
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Anya is LIVE right now
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
