you sunshine, you temptress

Just like we did in years gone by when there were leaks and PR bullshit. And fun things.

We came together in the good, and it’s comforting that we’re together in the bad.

We are in this together. With our boys.

i know people change and grief is unsure or complicated when it’s attached to a fond memory or the feeling a person gave you and not tangibly the person themself. i can see many of you on here are struggling with that right now and i understand.

a few years ago i purchased a home that Liam previously owned. there were rumors the house was haunted. He assured me it was not, and i believed him. because i know the ghosts that haunt us aren’t tethered to buildings. They live in parts of us that are harder to reach and they go wherever we do.

Their music, their interviews, the fic — it was a tiny utopia I could retreat to, untouched by the realities of life. In those albums, in those stories, they could just be five boys, singing, having fun, making it big, loving each other, and I could suspend the biggest truth of life for the length of a song, an album, a fic: that happiness and grief often go hand-in-hand.

Now, grief has walked into my comfort zone and touched everything. It’s tried to put things back where it found them, but it’s no use. My refuge has changed and there’s no going back.

i know people change and grief is unsure or complicated when it’s attached to a fond memory or the feeling a person gave you and not tangibly the person themself. i can see many of you on here are struggling with that right now and i understand.

a few years ago i purchased a home that Liam previously owned. there were rumors the house was haunted. He assured me it was not, and i believed him. because i know the ghosts that haunt us aren’t tethered to buildings. They live in parts of us that are harder to reach and they go wherever we do.