You shoot up in bed, sweating, your head pounding, and your heart racing. You can’t make out much in the dark as you try to remember where you are. You had nightmares often, but they never got easier to handle. You feel a soft hand on your arm, but you jerk away quick. Turning to your left you see it’s just your F/O laying next to you and not something, or someone, that you should be afraid of. You wish you could let out a sigh of relief, but you still haven’t calmed down yet. You’re on red alert.
“Hey, hey…it’s just me.” they say, trying to comfort you. You clinch your chest and swallow. Words feel like they’re just in your throat. “Another nightmare?” they ask. You hesitate for a moment before nodding in confirmation. “Do you want to talk about it?” You don’t pause before shaking your head vigorously. “Okay, that’s okay. I’m here for you.”
Your F/O doesn’t make a move to touch you again, afraid that they will startle you. They deliberately turn to their side of the bed and grab a cup of water off of the nightstand, then turn back to you and offer it. You take the cup and have a sip. Holding something physical in your hand helps you ground yourself, so you don’t hand it back. “Thanks..” you whisper, finding your voice, but barely. “I’m here for you.” they reassure you.
Ever since you moved in together, you felt so guilty about waking them with your nightmares. If you were lucky, it would only happen once a week or so, but sometimes you weren’t so lucky. This was the third time this week. You felt even guiltier knowing your F/O had a busy day tomorrow. “Don’t worry about me, I’m fine.” they soothe, “Let’s focus on you. Is there anything I can do to help?” They were always so kind to you, always helping you when you needed it. “Just…be here.” you say, setting the glass of water aside to give them a hug. They hug you back slowly and gently, as not to startle you again.
“Of course.”
