Wtf Is A Gender

I mean, it seems pretty obvious when you put it like that, right?

But how many families, when an introvert sibling or child makes an effort to socialize,  snarkily say, “So, you’ve decided to join us”?

Or when someone does something they’ve had trouble doing, say, “Why can’t you do that all the time?” (Happened to me, too often.)

Or any sentence containing the word “finally”. 

If someone makes a step, a small step, in a direction you want to encourage, encourage it. Don’t complain about how it’s not enough. Don’t bring up previous stuff. Encourage it.

My period pain on this scale is a nine, nearing 9.5. I can’t move almost at all, I feel like throwing up, I can’t think of anything else, a TENS unit didn’t even help with my stomach cramps, one the ones in my back. A heating pad is doing almost nothing, I can’t eat bc I feel sick.

Earlier I was bent over scraping puppy shit off the floor, because we recently gave away the last couple of them and it was my job to clean after them. When I stood up, my legs were so weak from all the pain my back and stomach had been in they were shaking and the gave out before I even got to the couch. Mind you, the couch is 10’ away at most. I was shaking for 20 minutes after I was done with cleaning.

Try a hot pad or ice depending on how your pain feels. I prefer hot pad on sore/aching muscles and an ice pack on my forehead or back of neck.

Eat easily digestible foods that aren't junk as much as possible. Vegetables, fruits, anything high in water content especially. Rice, puddings, jellos, etc. (I mean I already broke this rule today so just, do your best.)

Stretch! Cramping muscles build up the acid that makes you sore. Stretching helps release that, and can encourage them to Stop Being Assholes. Massages also help, but that relies on having someone you trust to do it.

Exercise is good but it can be hard. Try swimming or another low impact activity to start when you can (or just float in a hot tub).

Cravings usually mean something. If you have a craving for a particular food (especially one that is known for iron) then indulge. I always crave milk for it's vitamins right before my period.

Ibuprofen. This actually helps but you have to take it religiously. You can take up to 800mg (four pills, usually) but take it with food and it can upset your stomach. The reason ibuprofen helps is it fills the receptors that receive the chemical telling your body to cramp. If you take it constantly (even when you're not cramping) it will fill those receptor spots and render the chemicals null. Check the bottle but I believe you should be taking it every four hours.

- Do not add “Don’t you mean girls??” 

- Do not add “Eww” 

- Do not add “ *girls “ 

- Do not add “Me but with girls, lol” 

- Do not derail posts by and for boys who love boys, it’s disrespectful and annoying

and on top of that those headcanon posts tend to be circulated more (by other allistic fans, naturally) while headcanon posts by autistic fans get ignored b/c it’s easier for allistics to get behind shit like “haha well he’s a little socially awkward and likes trains” than “he repeats himself 8 times in a row and has a meltdown if you interrupt an activity he’s in the middle of”

and allistics tend to completely sanitize/downplay ~gross~/weird autistic traits and make them More Digestible for other allistics by being all “Well sometimes he doesn’t look people in the eye and he likes teddy bears” or they’ll go all “uwu soft precious baby eats the strings off of their friends’ hoodies how cute uwu” like

we’re people?? it feels uncomfortably fetishizing yknow??? stop it’s so uncomfortable and actually painful to read sometimes?? because you know the same people that’ll think me posting abt my headcanons where characters walk on their toes, do raptor hands, headbutt ppl to show affection, and chew on their shirt collars is Cute will ignore or even really hate nonverbal, meltdown-prone perpetually confused autistics who’ll physically fight you if you touch their belongings or food. even if theyre the same person.

because the only way allistics will create autistic characters is if they get to pick and choose the most Sympathetic autistic traits a person can have

so the same people who claim to Love autistic folks are often the ones who dont listen when we explain how to love us. these are people who will infantilize us and empty their pockets every time autism speaks asks.

if you go by one name IRL and another online, that’s okay.

if you have multiple genders and have a name for each, that’s okay.

if you use your birth name in some situations and your chosen name in others, that’s okay.

i recognise that practically all crops are grown and picked by exploited workers or slaves and nothing is ethical were all gonna die anyways

And a lot of vegan discourse does tend to be geared towards well-off health focused vegans who are into Detoxing and Cleanses and other bullshit that i don’t really care about

But at this point i just like beans too much and im comfortable continuing to be a Fucking Bean Eater. I eat what i want, and because of the whole no ethical consumption existing thing i don’t tell anyone else what they should eat.

Trans people a handful of times: I have a headcanon that this character is trans!

Cis people: 

we’ve told our stories and explained ourselves and justified again and again that asexuals and aromantics–and people under those umbrellas–are inherently queer.

we’ve done our research. we’ve cited our sources.

we’re here.

we’re queer.

Ace person: *is tired of fighting*

Ace: We’re here. We’re queer. Get used to it.

How did you pick a name? I’ve been going by ‘Toby’ online for a while now, but I realised I really did not want a biblical name and it just doesn’t feel right

But yeah, I am finding it difficult to pick a name for myself [including balancing my own proces with my parents - they have been very accepting and i would like them to be involved somehow, so I struggle between picking a name and letting them make a shortlist [although I could make a shortlist and ask them to pick? idk]]

I know some people choose a name with the same initials, or ask their parents what they picked out as an opposite gender name and take that one.