Beware The Ides Of March

I thought about drawing her with a cheeky eye open but decided no, absolutely not, Shadia is a professional who is committed to the bit! Thank you @captainofthetidesbreath for the prompt :)

Elderly lady mail clerk and young customer are chatting. Customer says, "oh! I'm wearing my boss's coat right now, give me something weird to put in the pocket!" Others within earshot all start looking for something because, hey, important quest. Mail clerk finally reaches under counter, pulls out a large roll of labels, and tears one off.

Twas this

Physics - probably the nicest just on the grounds of how fast that's gonna be. Like if you're a goner before any of the other sciences can get to you, you probably don't even have time to feel anything.

Biology - the most standard default way of dying. Most of the time it sucks but not badly enough to warrant you its own wikipedia page.

Geology - one of the oldest OG classics. Rock hits Og. Og is gone.

Psychology - slow tigers are chasing you.

Zoology - fast tigers are chasing you.

Sociology - idk me and the rest of the angry mob agree that you had it coming.

Chemistry - this is a hard one to place because there's a lot of variation. But anyhow you're getting undone on a cellular level.

Mathematics - how the fuck did you even do that.

Cosmology - why the fuck did you even do that?

Primus Tachonis is an all-purpose personal tragedy creator sure to spur your character to adventure specifically so they can get his ass. Whether you need an old money asshole muscling in on an institution beloved to your PC or an evil sorcerer to slaughter their entire family Primus Tachonis has the magic and the social station to create whatever tragedy is required to serve your backstory.

Primus Tachonis is so versatile as a backstory tool he has professional D&D players raving:

Primus Tachonis killed my character's best friend and now she has to figure out who she is without him! -Laura Bailey I wrote a light backstory because I was still feeling out the setting and my dungeon master used Primus Tachonis to turn my brother into a statue! -Travis Willingham Primus Tachonis is trying to take over my character's magic school and endangering her students, and she will not have that! -Marisha Rey I had intended my character to have a tense but ultimately repairable relationship with his father, but then my DM used Primus Tachonis to rip his skull from his head. Now my character is on a quest to kill every member of Primus' noble house! -Matthew Mercer My character was a happy and established local playwright until Primus Tachonis had his little brother executed. Now he's taken up the sword again in his brother's stead! -Liam O'Brian I needed someone to murder my character's wife and daughter and my dungeon master suggested Primus Tachonis, and I couldn't be happier with the result! -Robbie Daymond Even works on members of his own family! -Alexander Ward