Abundant Love

I know you and abby had your differences, but she is one of the people who has helped me the most once you left. She’s always there for me when I need her most. Especially when I’m lonely and missing the hell out of you.

Today would have been three years together. As I lay on the couch watching a little tv after work, our favorite movie is on. The vow. Is it a coincidence that this one movie is on? I think not 😊 I miss you and hope heaven is filled with snow just like it is here in MN. I love you, my sweet Johnny boy ❤️😇

It's 10:58 p.m. I'm just laying in my bed, listening to the sounds of the fans rotating back and forth trying to keep my roommate and myself from over heating considering my room is 80 degrees. The past two nights you have sure have been on my mind heavily. I don't know if it is because the two year anniversary is coming up or because I just miss you so much. I love when you drop a sign that you're with me. My heart still skips a beat and my stomach jumps to my throat. I miss you Johnny boy, I'll see you in my dreams 😘

It's crazy to think that two years ago today we started dating. I can still remember how everything went that night. Two years have flown by in a matter of seconds.

It is official I have completed my first semester of college. My dad came and picked me up for my winter break. A whole month off is going to be nice! The winter walk in Northfield was tonight. Kendra, Karly and myself decided to get together and go in. While we were there I saw your mom, sister and amora. It was really nice to see them and give them a quick hug.

A year and a half. I love you Johnny boy.

Well I'm all moved in. I just started classes and so far it isn't too bad. But that will probably be changing very quickly considering it's only day two of classes. I am really enjoying my time here. My floor hangs out quit a bit. Which is really nice. I have a class with Kelsey so seeing her is always good and I have two classes with Nicole. It sure is weird not having you ever been here. Everywhere I would go you have been but this is the start of a new chapter. And that scares the shit out of me.

I just got back from my yearly family vacation. I had a really great time. The weather could have been a little better but it was alright. Tuesday it was cool and cloudy out so we decided to go to the falls that day for our day our shopping day. Wednesday we took the pontoon out. We couldn't have asked for a better day. The fishing was terrible but it was sunny. As I was fishing two eagles were flying right above me and all I could think about was you. Then we went to the Ellsworth Rock Garden. After that we jumped into the lake to cool off. The water felt really nice! The only thing that sucked was I got really sunburnt :( On Thursday it rained pretty much all day so that was when I really got lost in the book I brought along. When I read it all I didn't know what to do because I didn't want it to be over just yet. Thursday night was also bingo and karaoke night. I sure hope you were proud of my for getting up and singing at the bar. I was nervous but I had my brother and sister there to sing with me. We sang Big Girls Don't Cry by the Jersey Boys. Over all I had a good vacation. Missed you like hell.

Today marks 15 months since you became an angle. I already know that I'm sure a date person and that I remember dates really well and events that happen on then. I got up this morning took off your sweatshirt I had wore to bed and hopped into the shower. I had an appointment with my therapist. When I was in there I didn't really have anything specific I wanted to talk about like usual. Which was odd especially on a memorial date. When I was talking to her was the first time I had thought about it being 15 months. Like every other month I will screenshot the date and specific time. But tonight was different. I was sitting in the living room with my family watch a tv show. I didn't even remember until right now while I lay in my bed that I forgot. Today felt different than the others. I don't know if it's because I don't look at the date like I would during school or if I'm starting to let go and move on. I really don't know. But I do know that I still think about you everyday and love you every much.