The Opposite of Amnesia

“We invite the children of same-sex couples to listen,” said the radio announcer. “We invite the children of different-sex couples to listen. We do NOT invite the Children of the Corn to listen.”

Fika is the Swedish tradition of having coffee, cake, and a chat. It’s such an integral part of the culture that many businesses have fika twice a day, and sometimes it’s mandatory. Source Source 2

germany: yeah we have something similar called “Kaffee und Kuchen” :)

Denny’s is your local, friendly diner open 24 hours a day every day of the year. A place to relax and enjoy a breakfast at any hour, a fulfilling lunch or delicious dinner. All are welcome at Denny’s, and it’s your safest location, provided you follow this very simple guide for the nightly hours.

Never close your eyes in a Denny’s parking lot. 

Walk calmly to the door; you will hear sounds. Do not look behind you.

Always make sure the door closes behind you, unless it was already open when you arrived, in which case do not touch the door.

Never sit at the table farthest from the front door. Your server will sometimes try to seat you there. Politely refuse and ask for another table.

If you see a table with two salt-shakers, walk past it; that table is taken. Sit at the table directly across from it instead. 

Eat your pancakes. Box any leftovers; it would be a shame to waste food. It might attract something.

Do not, under any circumstance, look into the eyes of your own reflection in the bathroom.

If your server’s eyes turn black, do not panic; order a coffee with extra cream. Do not ask for a refill. Do not stare.

Think you recognize someone who just walked in? Best to ignore it. It’s probably not what it seems. They will proceed to sit at the table farthest from the door.

If you are walking past a Denny’s and you see yourself sitting in the corner booth through the window, keep walking. Do not eat at Denny’s that night.

Did you tip? You better double check. It’s only polite to leave a tip.

Do not ask questions. They will Notice.

Beginning last summer Twitter user @fuguhitman began illustrating his personal backlog of bird-bread puns. His first starchy birb was the Sparroll and he claims to have at least 20 to work through. With 9 completed thus far, we have one question for him: why did you wait so long to share these works of punny goodness with the world?

Follow @fuguhitman on Twitter to make sure you don’t miss out on the rest of the breadbird flock and little bonus birbs such as this chocolate chick cookie: