Sapphic Cryptid

ok wouldn't it be really really cool if we made a version of super mario bros with the spirit of those "reanimated" projects: every level is created from the ground up by a different dev (including mario and his movement and all the game mechanics) but reinterpreted mechanically, visually, and auditorally through their own artistic sensibilities

powerup state, coins, and life count carry over between levels, and you have to restrict your control scheme to dpad + two buttons, but other than that there's no required consistency. you can reinterpret your level as an fps or make it a dating sim or whatever the hell go wild

we need non cancerous cigarettes to give to women so they look hot. men get the normal kind

Ever notice how you can bite, scratch, claw, drag, and use a doll in the most horrific of ways and it will eagerly follow your every word begging for more but the moment you say "It's my good little pogchamp, now hit the griddy downbad sexual style, with rizz" it will just stop and stare at you disappointedly?

the toughest thing about talking to cute girls online via text is when they start getting REALLY cute I wanna say everything to them in the softest sweetest way possible, and out loud, I can just change how I'm talking, but in text I sorta have to append :3 and <3, but I can't do that EVERY message or else that's boring and repetitive... I need more emojis with those vibes so I can do it more with variety

HIGHLY recommended putting a pillow in the backseat of your car because today i took a 45 minute long nap during my lunch break. when i returned i learned my boss had been running around all lunch looking for me to ask me a work question and i had inadvertently avoided All That by being unconscious in the parking lot #winning

Underrated form of intimacy: being silly together

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

“bend over” “bend what? over”

I hate this place