a silly little guy

or they say it all like calm and sad and thats even more incideious cause then you get the urge to comfort them and explain no its not you its just that what youre saying is really bigotted but they still see it as you attacking them and theyll still call you evil and stuff but just after they get you to make them feel better about themselves by telling them its ok and its not their fault :) (do NOT fall for this. RUN.)

A landmark housing bill automatically became law at 12 a.m. on Saturday after President Trump declined to sign it in protest of the Senate's inaction on an elections bill known as the SAVE America Act. The bipartisan bill, known as the 21st Century ROAD to Housing Act, is the most comprehensive housing legislation in decades. The measure aims to increase housing supply and bring down costs, including by limiting institutional investors from purchasing certain single-family homes.  [. . .] Massachusetts Democratic Sen. Elizabeth Warren, the chief proponent of the legislation in the Senate, harshly criticized the president's refusal to sign the bill. "At the stroke of midnight, a huge bipartisan bill to lower housing costs became law without the President's signature. Why did President Trump sit on the landmark housing bill for more than 2 weeks? Maybe because there was nothing in it for him personally — no gold-encrusted ballroom, no Qatari jet, no $2 billion crypto deal. Nothing in the 21st Century ROAD to Housing except ways to make housing more affordable," she said in a statement. "Donald Trump couldn't pick up the pen because he just isn't interested in lowering costs for American families." [. . .] [House Speaker Mike Johnson] ultimately expressed confidence that the bill would become law, noting that he had encouraged the president to sign it with "the fattest black marker you have," while telling him the results of the legislation "are going to be very, very good for the American people." "So I hope he does sign it. If he doesn't, it's still law; we'll still celebrate it," Johnson said. "But he's trying to make a point and I think he's making it very effectively." [. . .] The new law includes more than 45 provisions, many of which are aimed at increasing development of affordable housing by removing regulatory barriers and streamlining environmental reviews. It also launches a pilot program to aid local governments in converting vacant commercial buildings into affordable housing, unlocks more federal funding for the construction of factory-built homes and eliminates a rule that requires homes to be built on a chassis — a steel framework used to transport them. In addition, it creates an innovation fund for communities that are increasing their housing supply, supports housing opportunities for veterans and limits the purchases of single-family homes by institutional investors.

I don't know for sure though, that's just what I've been able to find, and I strongly encourage you to do your own research and for anyone with more knowledge and expertise to weigh in.

it is alright to say no

also, boundaries are good

and boundaries are necessary

medical chart on phallo, meta, and vaganiaplasty (transsexual experiences found it)

“A very marshy Terrarium” 

And abusive shit can be a lot of things. It can be a bigoted boss that resents their very presence at work. It can be a romantic partner that speaks only in violence and control. It can be a family member that refuses to acknowledge boundaries and feels entitled to their everything.

Abuse has a multitude of shapes and it takes a lot of courage for someone who is enduring it, to not only acknowledge it for what it is, but to reach out and TELL someone. They might not even be at the stage where they're asking for help, they just want someone to look at their reality, the true reality of it, and acknowledge that... yeah that's abuse.

And if you, yourself, have never experienced abuse - first of all, I am so glad, genuinely, that you've been blessed with such good luck - you might find the next steps in your friend's process to be deeply upsetting. Annoying, even. Because you say "yes, that's abuse" and they reply "okay" and then immediately go back to it. Even after you helpfully point out that they need to get the fuck out of there.

They keep going back.

And you're going to look at their actions and the conversations you've had and you're going to come to the conclusion that they're enabling the abuse. That they are actively participating in it, by not getting out as soon as they recognized the abuse for what it was.

And you're going to look at your friend and feel the urge to tell them that they need to stop "tolerating" it, because they have agency and they're clearly partaking in the abuse, by consistently coming back. Your friend might have even shared with you that the abusive situation has forced them to act in ways that, to your discerning eye, sound abusive themselves, which combined with their refusal to drop everything and go, means you might end up tempted to label your friend as a toxic person inherently, and decide to end the friendship entirely.

I am here looking at you in the eye to tell you all of that is the devil talking.

All of it.

While I understand the temptation to give "agency back" to survivors of abuse, no victim of abuse is ever complicit/enabling/participant in their abuse. Because they didn't choose to be abused. They didn't sign up for it. They didn't cause it. If you're wondering, we have a name for this urge people keep failing to repress, no matter how unsightly it is whenever they express it: blaming the victim.

So don't do that.

But also don't just tell a victim of abuse that they should leave and then be exasperated when they don't do so immediately. Do you understand what it means to leave? I suspect you don't.

Go check out HealingByTheNumebrs on Youtube, here on a very convenient playlist for you. Dr. Ruth chronicles HER own escape out of a 10 year abusive marriage. She talks about WHY she decides to leave, and then goes day by day on a 7 month journey to put together a reenactment of her escape plan.

It should help you understand why "just leave!" is not helpful. It's not even advice. It's borderline cruel, even. Are YOU offering to help them along with your loud proclamations that they should go? Are you opening your home to them, to have a place to GO? Are you offering to pay for costs?

Telling someone to leave is easy, particularly when you're not offering to help someone figure out how.

So please. PLEASE. If someone confides in you, do not listen to the devil, listen to your friend. Actually listen to them. And the be a fucking friend, and honor the trust placed in you by not being a fucking repugnant shitstain that betrays that trust immediately and starts parroting the devil's bullshit.