Sour Gummy Worms

do you think that mosquitos dare their friends to bite somebody with bugspray on

no, because mosquitos don’t have the mind to be able to communicate in such complex ways.

oh im sorry i didnt know u were the worlds top mosquito expert excuse me

I had a fight with my erection this morning.  I beat it single handedly.  

never forget

I’m a laid-back person with a ton of anxiety.

Technically, you can go the rest of your life without eating

Really?

Yeah. You’d starve to death, but it technically was the rest of your life

women are considered fragile but I’ve never seen anything as easily wounded as a man’s ego

this post is stupid as hell

case in point 

sorry i couldn’t hear you over my internal monologue 

honestly…

all I wanna know is if this is a public playlist.

Lmfao I had all these song on a mixed cd in middle school 😭