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- c'mon, Shaggydog

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hii about the character requests i would love to see euron or dany in your style đ
đŚđ¤Ť
Anyway, my personal headcanon is that Asha routinely witnessed Euron behaving in a sexually inappropriate manner towards his younger brothers in public, which in part inspired her decision to sexually humiliate Theon upon his arrival.
Actually you know what could explain why Iron Islands are Like That? Ergot.
"We do not sow" that's cute, but you are importing 90% of your grain, AND you're both broke and everybody hates you - you are getting the moldiest, most fungi infested rye the Reach has to offer. And with below 1% literacy rate and bcs everyone has brain damage from getting drowned to the point of clinical death, nobody can make a logical connection that perhaps you shouldn't eat this black stuff growing on your grain.
So now everyone is poisoned with this microfungi that produces an alkaloid which reduces fertility, leads to high mortality in infants bcs it's spreads with milk (including animal one), hallucination, mass psychosis and that's just the fun parts.
And now you have a bunch of islands full of religious fanatics who all act insane bcs they are on really bad LSD all the time.
the varying povs in asoiaf really do have distinctive voices from one another like for instance jaime is always ending his sentences with a vague ellipsis because heâs stupid. jon will interject his emo navel-gazing in italics between the plot happening consistently more than other characters do. bran is the youngest pov child so his internal thoughts are structured to be simpler than the others except for victarion, whose idiocy is truly astounding and has less of an internal dialogue going on than the seven year old. theonâs brain comes up with shit like the certain undeniable spice of fucking a tavern wench in lord eddard starkâs own bed and his lips look like two worms fucking. joncon is gay. cersei. this is all a testament to george btw you could drop me in any random chapter and within a couple of sentences i could tell you whose head iâm in just based on how mean their thoughts are. thatâs awesome.

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Sansa is too good and kind for the type of revenge fantasies I harbor in her name, but I really wish someone would give her a shotgun
Best girlâ¨
I think you guys forget that valyria was a slave empire so violent their victims invented the euthanasia religion đ
I DONT CARE ABOUT YOUR BLORBO MEN WHO ARE PATHETIC WET CATS. WHAT ABOUT MY PATHETIC SOAKING WET CAT IN A CARDBOARD BOX ABANDONED ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD CANT DO ANYTHING RIGHT BLORBO WOMEN WHO NO ONE FUCKS WITH. PLEASE NO MORE STUPID BLOND MEN. I WANT TO TALK ABOUT WOMEN WHO HAVE NEVER HAD A WIN IN THEIR ENTIRE LIVES!!!
Lyonel Baratheon the man you are

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dany and daenerys. jon and lord snow. robb and the young wolf. arya and mercy. sansa and alayne. theon and reek. catelyn and stoneheart. jaime and the kingslayer. melony and melisandre. young griff and aegon. jeyne and lady arya. dunk and ser duncan. egg and aegon. kill the boy and let the man be born. he was robb the lord now, or trying to be. jon would never. lord snow did. jaime, he thought, my name is jaime. call her by her name. call her brienne. in another life he had been someone else, but here and now, his name was reek. he remembered. âno one,â she would answer, she who had been arya of house stark, arya underfoot, arya horseface. is this the face of a conqueror? so far as she could tell, she still looked like a little girl. jon? jon? do we know anyone named jon, grenn? sheâd had so many names. had she only dreamed arya stark? jeyne, her name is jeyne, it rhymes with pain. he had taken off fatherâs face, bran thought, and donned the face of lord stark of winterfell. shout out your name before them all, tell them that you are not arya stark, let all the north hear how you were made to play this part. in there she was someone . . . but that was not the answer that he wanted. are all of them so blind? I must be alayne all the time, inside and out. I am not a wolf, no matter what they call me. I have a name. you have to know your name.
hyperfixating on a fictional woman who went underdeveloped in canon is literally FUN and the 80-90% of fandom people who only do the same for background character men have no idea of the degree to which they are fucking missing out
A KNIGHT OF THE SEVEN KINGDOMS 1.05: In the Name of the Mother 1.06: The Morrow
minor detail, but the joy that flooded my body when lyonel said âThe Othersâ
i may be wrong but is this the first time someone in a westeros show has said âothersâ and not just âwhite walkersâ?
either way it made me happy.
enough of the targs vs starks debateâŚthe people YEARN for house martell content. âfire and bloodâ âwinter is comingâ okay cool but letâs not forget who stood against the dragons and joined the seven kingdoms on their own terms. letâs not forget who remains unbowed unbent unbroken đ

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Stop calling my mans Armor basic when hes literally fighting in a Wine Barrel
Just because hes not obnoxiously Targaryen Branded doesnt mean he doesnt have Swag.
i loooooooove how lyonel baratheon had us all fooled from the get go with his dangly jewellery and shouty antics. loudmouth flamboyant drunkard, sure, but like hear me out
had profound (citation needed) thoughts about historical implication of jousting tournaments (itâs just no one cared to hear it)
clocked dunk for not being âjust tallâ
knows his vassal lords exact financial situation
knows about multifaceted nature of human beings
knows better not to spiral and overthink important matters at hand
knows precise time to take a breather to win a contest
knows lyrics to some smallfolk bangers
clocked dunk for not being knighted
clocked dunkâs being trouble potential for being catalyst of change
knows exactly when was the last historical precedent of trial of the seven (maybe read a book?)
knows at least 3 lines of knightâs vow
knows (for some reason) the mother is a young child's primary object of desire and affection, forming the basis of the Oedipus complex
knows baelorâs capacity to fight is undermined by his level-headed nature while maekar has much more to lose and will go ham
knows how to align himself with targs for optics but is still mindful of how they will always reap the benefits
Heâs a thinker and a schemer and a philosopher i fear.