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[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

New idealogy i call it Alcohol Feminism

watched backrooms movie today #mid

set design was cool. plot sucked tbh. the people to either side of us in the very back row of the theater talked over 50% of it which greatly reduced my enjoyment and comprehension of anything that was happening . me and wifey were very close to getting up and reporting them it was that bad but thankfully the biggest offender (this one fucking girl and her friends speaking at full volume making basic observations through the whole first part) actually mostly shut up after multiple people told them to stop

We Are the Daughters of the Microbes Who Could Survive in an Oxygen-rich Atmosphere

now that summer is upon us the absolute garbage hair removal ads I'm getting on insta are insane.

you can't even have a hairy bootyhole anymore. if you want to be near my asshole you better take it as it is you dumb fucking moron. I'd rather die than shave my buck cratt and poohole like literally I would rather get shot in the head because if I'm going to pay $$$ for some scrubbed up 21 year old to spread me and shoot lasers up my ass I've clearly lost the thread of what it means to be living breathing primate here on this planet and also Fuck Off

I am so sick and tired of having to charge stuff every day of my miserable life!! My phone, my watch, my headphones, my vibrator, my backup vibrator, my emergency vibrator, the ancient cursed amulet of darkness that whispers to me....it's too much!!!

the cruel doctor pepper experimented on me and now im the first human soda hybrid