𝑔𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑣，ance.

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a sound that can almost pass for a laugh if only someone wanted to ( depending on just the right context; it sounded nicely when he did it ) it delivered softly yet so harmlessly rehearsed.　there's literally zero exaggeration here!　he thought to himself.　stupidity had been at it's prime back then.　yedam remember those days fairly well himself those days were almost like golden memories to him.　even the embarrassing times..　where he tackled the poor boy making the both of them fall down the stairs,　riding bikes together,　the summers they had both shared together.　it was so much easier back then so free he felt.　because the belief he held in his mind that nothing carried consequences as long as you were young enough to out run it.　

“　of course i look different hah,　and so do you,　but you look way more handsome now.　”　slowly the burning sensation started in his chest, maybe it's because of all those rotten choices he's made in his life or perhaps that damn cigarette he had smoked previously.　the feeling was lingering in his throat becoming so dry.　there is redolence of smoke from the cigarette around his sleeves.　he shifted the plastic bag in his hand; fingers tightening briefly on the thin handles as if this weak thing can save him from his very own self.　he listened to jinho as he spoke,　studying him for a moment from his posture,　the look on his face was no joke　⸺　it proved tiredness from stress and the possible jet lag he's gotten coming here.　“　i do remember very well,　”　he stepped closer towards him filling the gap but kept personal space as he continued his words,　“　i remember when we tried to sneak out past our curfew years ago but the third floor’s floor boards were creaking like hell,　”　soft small smile lifted off the corner of his lips,　“　and you would fret like a baby scared about the fact that we'll get in trouble by him　...　but when he caught us roaming he didn't even scold us he just gave us tangerines.　”　the memory so well remembered it felt like something that only happened only days ago to him.

everything ran on a routine like schedule,　with so much errands and stuff on his hands the low energy caught up to him.　the sky spilled like dark blue ink when the last bits of the sun had sunken and the moon replaced with its rotation,　shining ever so brightly and full.　the conscience store was closed at once and twice,　a mental check.　much of a reminder in his head; sometimes when days like these come around,　he often forget having him to run all the way back to lock it.　it had only happened once!　yedam took the cover of the business for this week,　his mother had fallen sick with high fever,　a weak cough; yet she spoke stubbornly about going to the convenience store to work which quickly got shut down by yedam himself.　‘as your only son i’ll take care of it.’　the quoted words he told his mother before leaving with no complain after that.　a clear plastic hung from his hand;　cigarette box,　a bottle of water,　instant rice with some cheap side dishes while his other hand was occupied with a lit cigarette.　the pavement was so damped,　puddles of water everywhere in every step having to make him extend his legs wider or walk onto the road in order not to get those shoes wet.　this vibe　...　it had been like that the day he heard about the murder.　a post rainy saturday whilst cleaning the apartment hallways.　the mop in hand sloshing softly into the bucket as he dipped it in.　“　did you hear?　”　the voice that sounded like the landlord’s rambling towards the other old people,　they seemed invested,　shocked and sorry.　“　no suspects yet. can you believe that?　”　was added later on in the conversation,　“　such a shame,　that family already had so much misfortune.　”　mrs yeong, an another elder women spoke.　“　his nephew left the country, didn’t he?　”　yedam bent down quickly, pretending to adjust the bucket.　his reflection swimming in the dirty water,　“　poor boy.　to lose someone like that…　he was a great man.　”　one of them, miss chae tacked on,　“　they say he owed money,　”　⸺　“　eh, everyone owes someone these days.　”　and they just kept going,　talking about that old hag.　yedam straightened, forcing his shoulders to relax.　he turned just enough to offer a polite nod,　eyes lowered respectfully.　“　that’s terrible,　no one deserves that.　”　its all I could really say.

‎is it possible for an office to have a scent?  because it does to me though it isn't anything wildly protruding to be exact　⸺　but rather of something new and not like fresh paint or unopened boxes.　but more like not knowing the new habits or customs just yet. it was my third week here so far already receiving my a heavy work load since from the very first day yet i couldn't say i didn't like it　(　i really did not if i had to admit it.　)　but it is slightly better in terms of payment.　it paid much more than my previous job.　it also wasn't long enough for me to feel some sort of comfort or rather an adjustment to the environment already.　workers stopped pestering me about if i needed help logging in or even which i found rather awkward,　stare at me when I fixated on a task staring for a second longer when i wasn't looking before leaving. did the newbies always get this type of treatment?　but in the end i couldn't have bothered much about it as i always knew how to handle it.　the notice came to me on a  mid late evening when the office bathed in a dull golden - like brown;　becoming quieter and tiredness seemed to creep around the offices' atmosphere.　with relaxed brows i looked up at the numbers from my monitor,　numbers going down in columns neatly like it's supposed to in the right order.　it was to my surprise that today i've been exceptionally good; smiling　&　nodding when expected and tying my hardest to become 'that one employee that no one has to worry about.'　i felt a presence appearing behind me　⸺　team leader‎ standing there with a file tucked right in the safety of big arms; expression neutral but heedful like he's about to say something.　(　well, no shit sherlock!　)　“　excuse me mister kang,　you're being assigned to a project.　”　of course i am.　the team manager states firmly when i slowly adjust my chair towards his direction nodding.　by that time he started explaining about the details i needed to know;　something about some document verification, internal reviews and some other things which i noted somewhere in the back of my head　⸺　the words were boring but the implication wasn't much so-　

Happy birthday to me I guess

im just sipping on da squid ✌🏽😂😂😂

this is how I feel when I don't write and just disappear