The Good Old Bad Old Days

"i feel besquintled", said no one ever. because that's not a word.

once you realize you don’t actually need to sleep, you can really (stops talking abruptly and stares straight ahead for 4 minutes)

Once I said "My gender is whatever's funniest at the time" and my coworker stops dead in his tracks, turns slowly and says "So are your pronouns honk/honk?" killing me instantly

Update on that friend: a bunch of people sent me "he's a little confused, but he's got the spirit" gifs in response to that story. I can tell you now with certainty that she definitely has the spirit, and she's not confused anymore

No way i‘m the only one that read this as ‚bath salts‘ being the reason why the coffee isn‘t here.

Cards Against Humanity ass advertisement

sorry i act weird when i’m uncomfortable and also when i’m comfortable

[ID: digital drawing of a sunfish merfolk guiding a harnessed Mola mola away from a underwater city, two more M. mola with bags following behind. They are wearing a bone and jewel necklage. End ID.]

i suggest the contract is broken

@teaboot we have been woefully ignorant of the possibilities

to be completely honest *starts lying

men and women are not opposites. men and women are not enemies. men and women are two parts of a broad coalition which fights against a mutual enemy: inkjet printers