g.

august 6

3:58 pm

this comes from a place of understanding for all the people who chose to leave without saying a word.

it’s me realizing that sometimes, the reasons to stay get outshouted by the reasons to leave.

and that’s okay. it’s alright if you want to drop everything and run after your peace.

i wish i could do that too.

Sometimes I contradict myself. Sometimes I ask for closeness and then flinch when it arrives. I shut down when I mean to open up. I make things heavy when I wish they were light.

It’s not always easy to love someone like that.

I know I come with unspoken rules. With walls I forgot how to tear down, barbed wire made of past disappointments, and doors that open only halfway.

There are moments I want to be held and moments I want the world to forget I exist and the worst part is, sometimes those moments happen at the same time.

So if it ever gets too tiring, if the trying starts to feel like a losing game, you don’t have to stay. You’re allowed to walk away. No dramatic exits required, no guilt trips waiting for you at the door. Just leave, and know I’ll understand.

Because I’ve left parts of myself before, too. I know what it means to let go of something, even if it hurts, even if it once felt sacred.

And while I may not say it out loud, I do notice every effort. Every time you choose to stay. Every time you choose me despite the noise in my head and the silences I slip into.

I notice, and I am grateful. But I also know that love should not feel like unraveling.

So if one day the weight of me becomes too much for your tired hands, if you stop seeing the light behind my eyes and only see the fog I carry, you can let go.

You don’t owe me forever. You never did. I just hope, wherever you go, you find peace. And if you remember me, I hope it’s with softness.