Untitled

It hurt. More than he'd ever admit out loud.

The cuffs were painfully tight; the joint pinching as they were clearly not designed for someone his size. The needles embedded deep in his veins were sharp. Like knives stabbing and slicing the very tendons in his wrists.

He couldn't show weakness. Couldn't be weak. Couldn't be scared.

No matter how scared he was.

His brothers needed him. They were depending on him. He had to fight back. Free himself. Free them.

But what if he couldn't. What if... he failed...

No, he roared in his head. Yanking hard against his restraints again. He called out to Mikey and Donnie on either side of him. Hold fast! Hold strong! We can beat this!

He was pulling so hard his fingertips tingled. But whether it was from the force of his attempts to free himself or from the blood loss, he wasn't sure.

Where was Raphael?

Could he do this?

He had to do this.

He couldn't let his brothers down.

He couldn't.

Thrashing harder, Leo fought against the urge to cry out. Focused on the building rage and adrenaline instead. The fight in him. The need to rescue his family.

Crimson tubes running over his head mocked his efforts. Taunted him. Indifferently highlighting that he was losing. He was failing.

His brothers were dying right beside him.

And there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.

No!!! He roared, thrashing wildly. He'd rip his own arms off if that is what it took. Damn the pain! Fuck it! If they wanted an animal, he'd give them an animal.

Yanking. Pulling. Thrashing. Roaring.

Pain.

Fear.

Eyes focusing on his own reflection on the inside of his glass prison - his glass tomb - the sinking horror settled in. He looked to his left. And to his right. Donnie and Mikey were both going limp. Hanging from their own restraints. Knives sawing away at the structures of their own joints.

Unable to comfort them.

Unable to save them.

Unable to - NO!

Screaming out loud enough that his own eardrums felt they might rupture.....

Leo jerked hard in his bed. His muscles flexed hard against the phantoms of injuries that were still very fresh in his mind. His room was dark and still. Some might say quiet and serene.

But right now, it felt like a suffocating weight pressing down on him hard enough he couldn't breathe. Tossing his quilt aside, the normally blue banded brother recited in his head over and over to suck in air through his nose and out his mouth. In. Out. In. Out.

The lair felt stuffy. Moving into the open space of the common room helped some. He flipped on the light and stood in the quiet. As if something other than the rushing water would tell him what to do.

In and out.

In. Out.

He reached out for the tea kettle. But at the sight of his hand trembling, Leo abandoned the thought. Tea wouldn't soothe him. Not tonight. It never did after this nightmare. Because it was still too fresh.

Still too real.

Leo pulled out one of the simple metal chairs at their small dining table and sat. Rubbed his eyes aggressively, as if the action would erase the images from his mind's eye. As if he could bury the lingering thoughts somewhere deep in the recesses of his mind.

A creeping worry forced his muscles taunt once more. A tension stiffened his neck. Elbows bared down against the table's surface; the metal groaned in protest against the pressure. Men in white lab coats and tight metal cuffs loomed just behind him.

The need to turn.

To look.

No. No. No no no no no no. It wasn't real. They weren't there.

All in your head, Leo. All in your head.

In and out. In and out. In and....

Footsteps forced his eyes up. Fists clenched - prepared to fight for his....

His brothers lumbered into the room.

Donnie's normally tall frame slumped forward in grogginess as he stumbled towards the coffee pot, bumping into the fridge as he moved past. His hands lazily fumbled over the buttons, relying on muscle memory to get the pot going.

Mikey's eyes were at least open as he padded over to the stove. In typical carefree Mikey fashion, he hadn't bothered to put anything on over the bright leopard print briefs he was wearing. He mumbled something untellable to Donnie, who stared blankly at the youngest turtle a long moment before nodding.

Raph pulling out a chair at the table startled Leo. Raph just turned a blank expression to the eldest turtle before raising his chin in a silent, "Sup?" motion before dropping a small stack of comics on the table and taking a seat as well.

Soon, Donnie was stumbling over to pull out a chair for himself with his foot. Long fingers laced through the handles of three coffee mugs as he forced his eyes open enough to place one in front of both Raph and Leo.

Mikey pulled out a package of bacon from the fridge, holding it up for approval. Both Raph and Donnie grumbled something sleepily back, rewarded with a single nod of understanding.

Breathing was coming easier now. Leo's muscles relaxed a little, allowing him to uncurl from his hunched over posture. The tension in his neck slipping away. The hint of a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth.

Coffee wasn't Leo's preferred drink. It usually made him feel jittery. But right now, sitting with the comfort of his bale, it seemed like just the drink he needed to share with them. Raising the hot rim to his lips, a sigh slipped free.

"You guys don't have to do this," he murmured into the cup.

"Dunno what yer talkin bout, Fearless," Raph rumbled back, taking a drink from his own mug.

"I was just craving bacon," Mikey answered with a shrug.

Donnie was silent a long moment before just shrugging. "I respect you too much to lie." Another moment of silence. "That and I haven't had enough coffee to concoct one."

Leo huffed a laugh. "Thanks for your candor, Donnie. And for the bacon, Mikey. And for your - disinterest, Raph," Leonardo admitted softly.

The four sat in silence a moment. Each of them knowing. Each of them understanding.

"Sure thing, Fearless."

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