300 and 30

I opened a box they’d told me not to. To be fair to myself, they gave me to a man I’d never met. I’d never really met myself. (My lungs and blood and hair were clay, once.) That box was the only sort of history I had. Wouldn’t you want to know your own story?

I abandoned a daughter and a kingdom and ran away with a Trojan man.  It has been decided that I wanted to go. Even I’m not sure if I did anymore. They sent a thousand ships and said they were for me. (Secret: Troy was the only woman they wanted.)

The moral they intend us to take away is that women are responsible for all the evils in the world. I’d suggest you make your own moral instead.

Mine is that a single woman can uproot an entire world of men with the simple act of eating an apple, opening a box, loving a prince. 

Realizing this guy

is going to help raise this guy

I don’t usually defend Tony Stark. But this “Something went wrong” bullshit really rubbed me the wrong way. Wanna know why? Because the “Something that went wrong” was Howard Stark. The man that Tony idolised, and the man that abused him. And don’t give me that crap that in the MCU universe, Howard didn’t neglect or hurt Tony — he did. It’s very evident in the tie-in MCU comics.

But in both universes, Tony was raised by Edwin Jarvis. In 616, he has a father — Howard — who is constantly aggravated with his son, both as a result of his own drinking and because of what he feels Tony should be.

While Jarvis might be sensitive, thoughtful, intelligent and occupy roles that aren’t traditionally occupied considered “masculine” (which is bullshit in itself) if Tony ever displays anything remotely indicative of  a “softer side” he is ridiculed, called a sissy, told that Stark men are “made of Iron” and abused by his father: 

In the MCU, things aren’t depicted of being much better: 

And in the MCU Jarvis, often, tried to soften the blow of Howard’s words an actions. But don’t think for a second that Tony didn’t internalise all of that. That he didn’t think that Howard Stark was the man he was supposed to be, and the man he wanted to be most like. 

Of course, generally speaking — when Tony is the most like Howard — like at the Stark Expo, or during the senate hearings — it’s almost 100% preformative. That’s not who he is, or who he ever was, it’s who he thinks people want him to be, because it’s who his father wanted him to be.

I would go so far as to say that a lot of Tony’s womanizing ways, his alcoholism, his struggles with self-identity and importance all stem from the fact that he is often torn between being the man that he assumed his father wanted to be, and who he actually is.  

If you look at Tony when he’s alone, or when he’s with the people he cares about the most, what you see is the caring, compassionate person who Jarvis raised, and that he is a lot more capable and a lot more loving than his father ever was. And it took him a long time to be okay with that, and with showing other people that that was who he really was

So yes… Just a reminder, Jarvis helped raised this man:

  Don’t confuse the armour….

with the man who wears it.

Like, maybe we have a reputation as a bunch of freaky nihilists because we’re the only species that naturally has the capacity to be amused by our own misfortune.

Alien: Why are you happy? You’ve been seriously injured!

Human: *struggling to control laughter* Yeah, but I can imagine what that must have looked like from the outside, and it’s pretty hilarious.

First Officer Jane The Human: A SPARKLY LITTLE POMERANIAN THING WITH A GODDAMN UNICORN HORN CHASED ME STRAIGHT INTO A WALL! OH MY GOD! DID YOU SEE THAT? I RAN STRAIGHT INTO THE WALL. 

Captain XXlr’y: Yes I just observed this sequence of events! It was terrible!

 First Officer Jane The Human: OKAY WHO GOT THAT ON CAMERA, I WANNA SEE. 

Captain XXlr’y: So you more fully understand that this is a situation you should never get into again?

First Officer Jane The Human: SO I CAN SEND THE VIDEO TO MY MOM!

Captain XXlr’y: For… for the solicitation of maternal concern…?

It’s Ursus arctos horribilis. “ursus” meaning bear in Latin and “arctos”, bear in Greek.

so essentially a grizzly is a “horrible bear bear.”