Worth the While

So I’m watching Supernatural again (from season 4 ofc) and I’m pretty sure Castiel realised he was in love with Dean on season 9. This is the season he becomes human. At first he didn’t want to meet up with Dean, because he was ashamed of how he’s being misled by Metatron in casting the angels out of heaven. But I’m pretty sure that deep down he kind of was afraid of how he would feel in seeing Dean while he was a human. Because everything he felt as an angel might have been different as a human. Then, they first time they meet is when Cass dies and Gadreel brings him back and he sees a worry Dean screaming at him “Don’t ever do this again”. I think that’s when he actually felt how much he meant to Dean and that’s when his feelings started to actually appear. When he moved to the bunker (even for just few hours 😢) you can see how happy he was, the excitement in spending more time with Dean (and Sam) as human, exploring new feelings. But then Dean told him he couldn’t stay and I believe that’s when he kind of realised. He wasn’t scared because he had to learn to be human by himself. He was scared of these new feelings. That’s when he decides to start a new life, stay away from Dean and Sam, stay away from angel business. And in all this time he understood what he felt when Dean let him go. He was heartbroken. Because he loved him. That’s why when his angel team asked him to prove himself to them by punishing Dean he rather gave up on them. That’s why when Metatron told him he has done everything to save Dean Winchester, to save just one human, he didn’t blink once. Because he knew. He finally knew that what he felt as an angel was the same humans feel for each other. He was in love with Dean Winchester, as an angel, as a human, and he finally knew that for sure.

I’m watching Supernatural 7x03 and in the episode Dean is watching a Spanish telenovela and it is so much funnier now.