good girls always keep it secret.

𓆰♱𓆪 ⛪︎

That whole thing had stirred something loose in you, and you couldn't help it. For the most part you'd made your peace with what Hollis had done — he'd done what he had to — but your mind wouldn't let it go. Not all of it. Just one thing, the same thing, coming back on a loop at the worst moments: the shoes. Twelve pairs lined up too neatly along that basement wall, all different sizes, like they were waiting for someone who wasn't coming. You'd think about something else entirely and then there they'd be again, sitting at the back of your mind quiet and insistent.

Somehow, the gunshots you managed to file away. The grip on your leg, the blood — those you could quite reason through. But the shoes you couldn't explain, and the not explaining was what stayed with you.

At night you'd wake two or three times, jolting out of sleep, heart hammering. Once, Hollis caught you like that — he didn't make a thing of it. You were in the passenger seat, so he just reached over, touched your face gently, then left his hand resting on your upper thigh, drawing slow, shapeless patterns into your skin until you drifted back under. At least when you were in the same bed, all you had to do was press yourself against him and he'd hold you back. That certainty alone was something.

And that was the easiest part about all that, even though he'd noticed — he didn't meet you with impatience or questions you didn't know how to answer. You knew because of the small things. It was in the way he'd move with caution around you. Three days after the house, you'd flinched hard at a car backfiring on the road beside you, and when you looked over at him he was already watching you, steady and quiet, like he'd been waiting for exactly that and already knew what to do about it, which was softly caress your thighs, reassuring. He was just there. And he did not make it strange.

One night, in a town you were passing through, he insisted on going out. You were still too hollowed out and tried to refuse, but he insisted upon it in such a lovely way you gave in. You put on a simple mid-length dress, your boots, and a jacket Hollis draped over your shoulders before you'd even thought to reach for one.

You went to a bar and had dinner together — a decent meal, for the first time in what felt like forever. It was a simple small town bar, a candle on the table, a bartender who called you folks, someone playing guitar in the corner badly enough to be charming. From the outside it must have looked like a date. And somewhere between the bread basket and the main course you caught yourself thinking exactly that — this feels like a date — and underneath it, quieter: we are on the middle of nowhere, a man is probably dead on our account and I am sitting here thinking about how this feels like a date. You let the thought pass through you and didn't pull on it. You picked up your fork and kept eating and let yourself have it, just for tonight.

After you ate, you went through rounds of drinks. Hollis, oddly enough, had taken it upon himself to introduce you to alcohol. You tried beer, then whiskey — a good one, he said, though you couldn't tell the difference — then vodka, then tequila. They were all terrible. You had a sip of each and Hollis finished the rest.

"Alright, I think you're just not a drinker," he said. "Or maybe—"

He glanced at the menu and said something to the bartender. A round glass arrived, filled with something red, and you sipped it cautiously. For the first time it was actually good — didn't taste like alcohol at all. You looked up at Hollis with wide eyes and a wide smile.

"Jackpot," he smiled back. "Guess my girl has a sweet tooth."

His girl, you thought.

The drink was dangerous. You ordered another, and by the fourth round you felt lighter than air. Hollis was delighted watching you like this — loose and unguarded — and he was a little drunk himself, you thought, laughing more openly than usual.

You were humming along to the country song playing through the bar, not really thinking about anything, when you felt his eyes on you. Too steady, too intent. It made your cheeks warm and your breath go short — he could have the softest, most unhurried eyes of any man you'd ever met. Maybe of anyone. You wanted to kiss him, but not with all these people around.

"Can we go back?" you asked, your voice easy and light.

"Sure, honey." He was on his feet before you'd finished the sentence.

He settled the tab and then you were out on the street, the night air hitting you clean and cold after the warmth of the bar. You walked close enough that your arm kept brushing his, and at some point his hand found yours and stayed there. Neither of you said anything about it. The street was quiet and the motel wasn't far and the cold felt good against your warm skin, and you thought: I could get used to this. Matter of fact, you were getting used to it. And you held his hand tighter anyway.

Back in the room, Hollis stepped inside and started shrugging off his jacket, completely unaware that you'd been standing in the doorway watching him in silence for a full minute. Only when he sat on the edge of the bed did he glance back and catch you staring.

"What's wrong, pretty girl?"

"Nothing." You stepped closer. "You've been so nice tonight."

He smirked. "What you mean? I'm always nice."

It was a joke, but he wasn't wrong. "You are. I just wish I could repay you. For everything you've been doing for me."

"You're so fucking adorable," he laughed softly. "And a little dumb if you think you're not already."

He reached for your hand and pulled you to him. You settled between his open legs. He brought your hand to his lips, and you giggled.

"Want to do something for me?" You nodded immediately. "Then get on your knees."

It took you a second, but you did, lowering yourself in front of him. He was still holding your hand, so he guided it to his crotch, and you took over from there, touching him on your own. He smiled — that knowing smile that always made you flustered and warm. As you felt him growing hard, you reached for his zipper, pulled his jeans down, then his boxers. He was only half hard, but you worked him with your hands, then leaned in and let a slow thread of saliva fall to his tip. You were so focused on watching his cock harden in your grip that when his hand came to your face you flinched, looking up to find him watching you carefully.

"Can you use that pretty mouth on me?"

"I've never done that," you answered, still stroking him slowly.

"That's alright. I'll guide you."

You pressed your lips together before leaning in. You didn't know how he'd fit in your mouth, so you started by licking him — slowly, from base to tip, keeping your eyes on his face as you went.

"There," he said, when your tongue swept across his swollen head. "Now open your mouth, baby."

You did. "Wider." You opened further. "Stick your tongue out." You followed every instruction.

Holding himself by the base, he pressed his tip to your mouth — first tracing your lips with it, then resting it on your tongue. Feeling him like this was something else entirely. There was something about being taught rather than just taken — the patience of it, the way he watched your face more than anything else — that loosened something in your chest you hadn't known was wound tight.

"Can you suck on it?" You nodded and closed your lips around him — around his tip, at least.

You sucked lightly, working mostly that part of him until his hand pressed gently to the back of your head, encouraging you further. You took more of him, then drew back, then did it again. Every time he'd reach your throat, you'd draw back, so you worked the rest of his length with your hands. He didn't seem to mind, he seemed to like it cause sometimes, his voice went needy and those low, strained sounds slipped out of him — it made you wet just to hear it. You wanted to give him more, so you pushed yourself a little further, until it made you gag, and then you pulled back.

"Such a good girl," he breathed, when you found a rhythm that had him panting.

It filled you with something more than pride when he started to come undone — chest heaving, breath catching, voice failing him. He cursed as you felt him finish on your tongue, thick and warm, and you kept sucking until you'd taken the last of him. It was still in your mouth when he finally pulled away.

"Did you swallow?" he asked. You shook your head. "Can you do it for me?"

You nodded, and then you did. You knew his taste by now — that one time at the church you had tasted it — but taking so much at once made your nose wrinkle. He laughed at that and pulled you up into his arms.

"Now let me take care of you." He kissed your face, your neck, then moved lower, to your chest.

He pulled the straps of your dress down to bare you, and the moment he had you he sucked your nipple into his mouth, eagerly. You gasped at the sensation, your sensitive skin lighting up under his tongue, and all you could do was hold on to his shoulder and grip his hair. Hollis seemed to like that, because every time he did that it felt like he was starving for your body. 

He ended up working his fingers into you right there in his lap, and he was so good at it that it didn't take long before you were crying out his name, rolling your hips desperately, begging without shame. He drove his fingers into you while his thumb circled your clit, kissing you sloppily and deeply all at once — so much happening at the same time that your edge came up fast and hard.

Even then he wasn't done with you. The night stretched on with him taking you in bed, pulling you onto all fours and driving into you with urge. You buried your face in the pillow from how undone it made you feel — mind wiped blank, reduced entirely to the sensation of him pounding into you. He was already so deep you didn't think he could go further, and then he laid himself over you, his weight pressing you flat into the mattress, one arm looped around your neck, his warm breath at your ear as his hips kept moving behind you.

He pulled out just before the end and came across your back with a rough, wrecked sound, while you lay completely spent beneath him. He crumbled to your side afterward, and you felt his hand on your face — so soft, so careful. You kept your eyes closed.

"You don't have to worry about a thing," he said. A kiss pressed to your cheek, and you could feel from the warmth of his breath that he kept his face close to yours even after. “My angel.” 

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

You woke the next morning to an empty bed. The sheets on his side were already cold. You lay there for a moment in the quiet, looking at the ceiling, and let yourself think about the night before — the bar, the walk back, his hand in yours on that empty street. You thought about the way he'd looked at you while you were humming to that song, like you were something worth looking at. You thought about him teaching you how to suck him properly — so patiently, so endearing it made lust turn into something else. You tucked it somewhere careful and got up to shower.

He was back by the time you were braiding your hair, and it caught you off guard when he showed you his new gun. This one looked heavier, and from the little your father had taught you, you could tell he'd switched models — from a revolver to a pistol. And of course he had, because guns can be traced. So it wasn't just you who'd been worried. Before you could sink too far into that thought, he held out something else — a gift, he said. A pocket knife. You needed to be able to defend yourself, he said. You took it in its sheath and tucked it into your boot, quietly hoping you'd never have to use it.

"I need shampoo," you said once you were back on the road.

"Don't the motels have it? I use theirs," he glanced over at you briefly.

"They do, but it's terrible." You ran your hands over your braids. 

"Your hair looks nice though," he said, and you laughed. The way he said it, briefly glancing at you, so adorable.

"What?"

"Thanks, Holli." You leaned over and kissed his cheek. He smiled.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

You got out to fill the tank while Hollis went inside for his cigars — you asked him to grab some snacks too. When you finished pumping you sat up on the hood and waited, but he was taking too long, so eventually you went in after him.

It didn't quite surprise you, what you found, but it shocked you.

Hollis with his gun leveled at the cashier, the man emptying the register with shaking hands. You stood in the doorway and just — looked. Not at the gun, which you knew. At him. You stood there frozen, you never actually saw him like that, the particular stillness of his posture, his attention, the way his eyes tracked the cashier with a calm that had nothing uncertain in it. This wasn't new to you, you knew he did this, it was just different. The same Hollis holding your hand last night was this one making someone tremble and fear for their life.

Then Hollis registered you. 

"What—" Something flickered across his face, just briefly, before he recomposed  “Honey, go back to the car.” 

And you turned to do exactly that. No questions, just turned on your feet and walk back to the door. But you didn't make it to the door. Another man appeared — broad, tall, carrying a shotgun, frightening enough without it. He swung the barrel straight at you.

"On the ground, lady."

You'd never been held at gunpoint before. Seeing it up close made your body move before your mind could catch up. You lowered yourself to the floor.

"Drop the fucking gun or I'm putting a bullet to her head," the man called out.

It didn't take more than a second, you heard the scrape of metal on tile. Then the man stepped past you, and you raised your eyes to find him pointing the shotgun directly at Hollis, who was now on the ground, the man shouting over him but all you could hear was your heart slamming against your ribs, tears pricking your eyes. And when the man struck Hollis with the butt of the gun, you moved on instinct. You pulled the knife from your boot, crossed the floor, and jumped on the man's back. You drove the blade into his side once — it was all you managed, and your small knife didn't do much more than make him stagger — but it was enough. Enough for Hollis to wrench the shotgun from the man's hand and get to his feet, his pistol already in his other hand. The moment he was standing you let go, dropping to his side. He dropped the shotgun, kicked it away and had his gun trained on them now, and the thought of what he might do made your stomach clench.

"Don't shoot," you said quietly, low enough that only he could hear.

"Both of you, to the back," he said, his voice flat and commanding. "And hand over your phones."

They did as they were told. The man you'd stabbed moved slower than the other, a dark thread of blood spreading through the fabric of his shirt. They filed into the back room, and as they crossed the threshold Hollis looked at the cashier.

"Give her the keys."

The man handed them over without argument. You took them.

"Close the door."

They did, and you locked it behind them. Hollis swept the room after security cam — nothing. Then he grabbed the money bag and his cigars from the counter.

"Get your snacks," he said.

Somehow his ease made you easy too, even with your blood still going. You grabbed what you'd come for, and on your way out you stopped at a small display by the door and picked up a pair of sunglasses — white, cat-eye. He looked at you and smiled, then leaned down and kissed you. "Beautiful."

Back in the car, the adrenaline was still singing through you. Hollis was all loose smiles, some loud song shaking through the speakers. You didn't feel scared or wrung out, actually you felt electric. It kept replaying: his voice commanding both men, the gun steady in his hand — the one he still had in hands, resting against the steering wheel now, casual as anything.

“You're such a good girl,” Hollis said, that easy smile hanging from his lips. “Made me so proud.”

Maybe it was the adrenaline. Maybe it was the praise. You didn't stop to think about it. You pulled off your boots, then your shorts. Hollis glanced over, clearly surprised though still smiling, and in one motion he pulled the car to the shoulder and killed the engine.

That was all you needed. You climbed into his lap and kissed him the way you'd been wanting to — hard and desperate, pressing into him as his hands found your thighs, your ass, smacking you lightly and playfully. You could feel the gun against your waist as he held you with it in his hand. In between kisses he pulled your shirt over your head, one brief parting before you came back together in a wet, messy kiss.

"What's all this?"

He was reaching to set the gun aside on the passenger seat when you caught his wrist. He raised an eyebrow. You brought his hand closer instead. "I like seeing it."

"Yeah?" A small smile. "You complained about it enough when you first found out."

"That was before I saw you with it." You guided his wrist slowly — down your chin, your neck, down between your breasts, across your stomach — until the barrel rested against the front of your panties.

Some distant part of you registered what you were doing — you are guiding a gun to yourself and asking for it — and beneath that, quieter still: you would not have done this three weeks ago. But you just couldn’t stop thinking of the version of him you'd seen back there, and you thought about his hand in yours on the street the night before, and you understood that both of those things were him and neither cancelled the other out, and that you wanted both. You filed those thoughts away as you rolled your hips and stopped thinking entirely.

"What have you turned into?" Hollis said, and took over, pressing the muzzle against you. You rolled your hips, chasing the friction.

You sighed as he moved it against you. His other hand came to your face, thumb pressing between your lips. You sucked on it, still grinding against the cold metal, his gaze fixed on you and sharp enough to make you soak through your underwear. It was enough.

Your hands found his jeans, worked the zipper open, pulled him free — and he was already hard. You both moved at the same time; you lifted your hips, he pulled your panties to the side, and then he was sliding into you, deep enough to make your eyes roll back. Exactly what you needed.

You kept your eyes on him as you moved, whimpering with every roll of your hips, and he watched you just as closely. The barrel of the gun traveled slowly up your stomach, between your breasts, until he rested it beneath your chin.

"Faster," he said.

You went faster — bouncing on his cock in quick, urgent strokes, half because of the gun at your chin and half because your body simply demanded it.

"Crazy bitch," he said.

You bit your lower lip after hearing that, and braced both hands on his shoulders to keep the pace. But he'd stop you, Hollis grabbed both of your hands and folded them behind your back, your wrists together as he held them with one hand. The gun still on your chin, his gaze so sharp you could swear you saw him gleaming at you. He pressed the gun harder against your chin, the cold metal making you shiver, his grip on your wrists so tight you swear it'd bruise later.

“My beautiful, beautiful angel,” he said hoarse, breath catching.

He caressed your face with the gun in hand, your cheeks, your mouth, it made you whimper at that and that was exactly what tipped you over: your whole body shuddering and then shaking on top of him, the orgasm tearing through you while you bit your lip so hard you tasted blood.

He let your wrists free and his arm circled your waist instead. Then he began thrusting up into you — hard, lifting your body with each stroke. You cried out, overwhelmed, barely keeping yourself upright.

You knew he was close. And when he moved to push you off him, you held on, grinding your hips down.

“Want me inside?” He asked with an airy voice and faint smile.

You nodded, compressing your lips in the heat of it.

"Please," you breathed, eyes on his. You kept moving, kept clenching around him — and that was all it took. A low, wrecked sound broke from his throat as the first of him spilled into you, warm and sudden enough to make you gasp. You could feel as he filled you up, the heat of it spreading across your skin smooth, from inside out, that warm fuzzy feeling getting you almost numb. You stayed still above him, both of you unraveling, neither of you speaking.

You kissed him slowly, and he held you so tightly afterward that you knew it had gotten to him too.

Then — a gunshot. You turned to find him pointing out toward the open field, the window down. You laughed. You kissed him again as he laughed with you. In that moment you felt completely outside yourself — weightless, untethered, way over the edge of anything that had ever felt ordinary.

Being the princess of Tenflower was lonely.

That was the best way to describe it. It’s not like you were alone. You had your family, your servants, daughters of aristocrats you frequently spoke with. 

But you were never able to really live due to your overprotective father. You weren’t able to interact with the public or go out of the castle without his permission. You had given up on asking to go places long ago. He always said no. 

So you spent most of your days in your room. Luckily, it was spacious and full of everything you’ve ever loved. Everything you ever needed was in the castle.

You stared outside of your room, book in hand. The sky looked pretty this time of night. When you were having trouble sleeping, you always pulled a book out to help.

The wind from outside lightly blew your hair back. You could see the entire city from the castle. You could see the individual windows of the buildings, some with light on and some not. 

You saw a couple galloping down the streets in the middle. You were far away, but you could tell they both had big smiles on their faces. Probably drunk from the bar they came out of. You wondered if you would ever be as happy as them. 

You sighed and closed your book. You felt sleepy, finally.

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

“The knights are sparring in Tenflower Square today.” Your mother spoke, taking a sip of her tea. 

“Cool.” You responded, more focused on biting into your eggs. You weren’t really the most interested in the violence of that stuff.

“The family is expected to be in attendance today.” A beat. “That means you, too.”

You dropped your fork. “What?” 

“You’re coming.”

“Mama, I’ve told you I don’t like watching fights.”

“There won’t be any actual bloodshed this time. It’s just to demonstrate the skills of the Tenflower army for the city’s enjoyment. They fight to protect you, you know. It’s a reminder of how you’re in good hands.”

You sighed. None of this ever interested you.

Your mother noticed your annoyed expression. “Tell you what. If you go with us to the spar, I’ll talk to your father about letting you go to the bookstore across town. By yourself.”

Your face instantly lit up. “Really?”

Your mother closed her eyes and nodded. “But only if you come with us today, will he consider. The royal family in full is expected.”

You couldn’t pass up an opportunity to leave the castle. You’ve always heard about that bookstore, how it had almost every book you could think of. 

“You’re awfully excited. I thought you didn’t like this sort of stuff.” Your servant Cecily said, helping you into your dress. Cecily has been working for your family ever since you were born. You felt closer to her than your own mother, sometimes. She felt like a part of the family at this point.

“I don’t. Mother promised me something, though. So I’m coming.” You smiled, daydreaming about the aisles of books you were hopefully going to look through soon.

“Figured. Want me to do your makeup all heavy, like the girls do?” She walked you over to your vanity to sit down. She was talking about your friends, they were all the epitome of femininity. You, not so much. But you preferred that. 

“I guess just this once won’t hurt.”

The sound of your heels, that were honestly too big for you, echoed off of the halls of the castle. Your parents smiled satisfactorily when they saw your outfit while waiting at the end of the hall.

“Oh, my wonderful daughter!” Your father exclaimed, walked up to you and brought you into a hug. “I’m so happy you’re coming. The residents of Tenflower will be overjoyed to see their princess. You look wonderful.” 

You hugged your father back. Your mother was beside him smiling as well. 

“Are we ready to go?” The driver was beside them. It was almost time for the spar to start. 

“Yes, let us go.” She replied. “Come on, (y/n).”

Outside, the horse carriage was waiting. It had been a while since you’ve been in one. In that time, the castle had upgraded the carriage to a better one with more comfortable seating. You got inside with your parents and sat on one side, while they sat on the other. The horse neighed when the driver moved the reins.

You stared out of the carriage window as it left the castle. Everytime you left the castle you felt yourself constantly staring at everything, like you were trying to take everything in. 

The spar wouldn’t be all boring. Your friend Charlotte was to be there. She was a fan of all of the violence, and would watch it with a smile on her face. 

Your parents were having a conversation. Something about kingdom politics. You tuned it out and zoned out with your eyes on the window. As you got closer to Tenflower Square, you could hear the sound of a huge crowd.

Luckily, you wouldn’t have to go through it. There was a separate route that went straight to the section you’d be sitting in. When you arrived there and walked out of your carriage, you saw Charlotte right next to where you’d be sitting.

“(y/n)!” She grinned, greeting you as you came to sit.

“Hello, Charlotte.” 

“What are you doing here? I thought you hated stuff like this. Always called me weird for it.”

“I do. But my parents promised to let me go to the bookstore across town if I went, so.” You smiled smugly.

“Ugh, I knew there was a catch. Sit down though. It’s gonna start soon. I have to point out this one knight to you, he’s so handsome. And he’s the best ranked knight in the whole army.” 

“Really?” You replied back, a little disinterested. You planned to space out during it mostly.

“Yes. You’ll notice him, he sticks out like a sore thumb in comparison to the rest of them. Like a prince.”

Your eyebrows raised at her description. “I’ll keep a look out, then.” 

Charlotte knew you likely wouldn’t. She was happy you were here, though. The initial smile when she spotted you didn’t leave her face.

She was what you could call your best friend. You have been friends for a long time now, ever since you were a child. She had just always been there. Her hair was brown, usually kept up in a braid. Her eyes were the same color. Her face had freckles across the middle, full lips, and small eyes. 

A horn sounded through the square, signaling that it was time for the spar to start. You focused on the middle.

The announcer called out two knights to start. Ain and Hollis were the names.

You glanced over at Charlotte. She was at the edge of her seat with her eyes wide open, not wanting to miss a second of it. The fight started, and both knights lunged at each other. 

It was an admittedly impressive sight. The one on the right had calculated movements. He moved fast. But so did the one on the left. It looked like they had practiced together many times before.

The crowd gasped when one of them got on top of the other. The announcer’s voice rang through the square again. Cheers erupted. The one called Hollis had won this round.

It went on for two more. Hollis won one, and Ain won another. Overall, Hollis was the winner. Cheers erupted once more, and both of the knights took off their helmets to properly bow. 

“That’s him.” Charlotte leaned over and whispered to you. She didn’t have to tell you, you already knew.

He was… not as rugged looking as the other knights. His face had a feminine like feel to it, with chin length blonde hair. He looked around the area, waving to everyone watching. He was much taller than the other guy, too. 

“Isn’t he handsome?” Charlotte giggled. 

“Looks like a pompous ass.” 

Charlotte hit your arm lightly. 

“Hey! Am I wrong? Men who look like that are surely full of themselves.” Admittedly, he was handsome. He caught your eye immediately. As he walked off from the middle, you saw him be congratulated by the rest of the knights, including the one he just fought. He seemed popular within them. 

“I would be too if I was that beautiful…” Charlotte said dreamily.

You rolled your eyes lovingly at her. She seemed to think every guy was handsome, always pointing one out to you that you weren’t impressed by. But this one…you could hear her out. Just a bit.

The rest of the spar was boring, as you predicted. You just didn’t see the appeal in watching dudes fight, especially when it’s not a real fight. But at least your attendance would get you something this time. 

You clapped whenever everyone else clapped. You spent the majority of it daydreaming about something. You were broken out of your trance when you heard your name called by the announcer, and your mother tapping your shoulder for you to stand up with them. 

Everyone was looking at you. It was rare for you to have public appearances. They clapped for you, and you waved around at the crowd. In an elegant way, like your mother taught you. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

When it was over, there was a ball at the castle. You tried to go back to your room and read, but your mother stopped you and told Cecily to go upstairs and get you into a new dress for the ball, which ultimately meant you had to come. You groaned on the way there and Cecily exchanged a sympathetic look with you.

At least Charlotte would likely be in attendance. So you wouldn’t be too bored.

The hall was bustling with people. A certain number of knights from the spar were invited. Including the one Charlotte pointed out to you. He was surrounded by girls pestering him about how good of a knight he is. 

You instantly found Charlotte by the table of sweets and drinks. “Hey.” You tapped on her shoulder.

She turned around, mouth full of cake. “Hey!” She smiled. Her cheeks resembled a chipmunk with peanuts stuffed in its mouth.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full.” You snickered. 

She swallowed it. “Sorry. Your chefs make the best cake I’ve ever had. How long have you been standing there?”

“Not very long. I just got here. Your crush is quite the ladies man.” You tilted your head towards the night from before, surrounded by maidens.

Charlotte sighed, now stuffing her face with small sweets. “I hate those girls.”

“You’re jealous?” 

“Duh. I could never go up to him and– he’s walking this way.” She interrupted herself.

“What?”

“He’s walking this way!” Charlotte muttered in a harsh whisper. She quickly swallowed her sweets, wiped her mouth off, and made herself presentable.

You looked in his direction. He was coming your way with two other knights. You recognized one of them as his sparring partner. What surprised you the most was that he was coming up to you.

“Excuse me?” His voice went through your ears for the very first time. “Princess.” 

“Hello.” You responded. 

“I wanted to introduce myself to you, since your presence is such a rare occurrence.” Hollis kneeled, and boldly grabbed your hand. “I’m Hollis. My number one priority is to protect you and your family.” He kissed the back of your hand. It was a common gesture, for knights that wish to pledge loyalty. But you would be lying if you said your heart didn’t skip a beat.

Due to how overprotective your father was, you didn’t really have contact with boys. You’ve read countless romance novels, behind your parents’ back, so you know about the whole world of it all. This was the first thing you’ve experienced anything close to it.

Hollis’ hazel eyes looked up at you after. You felt flustered, and quickly muttered out your next words. “Thank you.”

You could see Charlotte out of the corner of your eye, with hers wide open.

“My pleasure.” He smiled, standing up. He walked away with the rest of his friends.

Charlotte slowly turned to you with your mouth open. “...How did you not scream?!”

“It’s a common gesture.” 

“Your face is red, you know.” 

“No it isn’t.” You smiled, pouring yourself a drink.

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

The knight’s quarters were always rowdy, as most places filled with only men were.

Hollis sat at one of the tables in the dining hall, with Ain and his other friend, Simon.

“You have got a fuck ton of balls.” Ain said, drinking a beer. “Seriously.”

“I couldn’t believe my eyes. You were lucky the king wasn’t there, he would've had your head immediately.” Simon said.

Hollis’ fingers trailed across his lips. “Her hand was so soft. I seriously think she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

“Too bad she’s off limits.” Simon said. “Her attendance is so rare because the king keeps her locked up in the castle.”

“Wants to protect her chastity at all costs.” Ain added. 

Ain and Simon snickered at that. They noticed Hollis wasn’t laughing.

“What? Don’t tell me you like her.” Ain’s eyebrow raised.

Hollis leaned back in his chair. He shrugged. 

“Hollis, you have all the maidens in Tenflower to choose from, that are actually attainable. Snap out of this.” Simon said.

“Yeah, like she’s hot and all but if you actually tried anything and they found out you would genuinely be executed. Not worth it.” Ain grimaced, thinking of the sharp blade of a guillotine. 

Hollis took a sip of his beer. “I know.”

“I think you just need to get laid. You’re too focused on fighting to see all of the girls throwing themselves at you.” Simon said.

Hollis downed his beer. “You’re right.”

Hollis laid on his bed in the knight’s quarters. Next to him was a girl. He didn’t quite catch her name, Matilda or something like that. She was completely knocked out, with only her underwear on.

Despite the interaction he had with her, the princess was the only one on his mind. He remembered your kind face, your pretty hair, the softness of your hand. 

It was useless. Not even sex could distract him from the feelings that immediately formed. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅ 

You barely slept last night in anticipation of being able to go outside tomorrow by yourself. 

Your parents told you more about how it was going to go. The driver would take you to the bookstore by carriage, you’d go inside and get all the books you wanted, and then come back. No stops. That was fine for you.

The ride there was pretty long, so you brought a book to read on the way. You heard the ambience of outside; children playing, bells ringing, people living their lives like normal. As privileged as you were to be the princess of this city, sometimes you wondered how life was being a normal citizen. Being able to live your life freely.

“We’re here. I’ll wait for you by the door, come out when you’re done, alright?” Your driver said to you.

“Okay.” You replied. You walked inside of the bookstore. It was as amazing as you imagined it. Aisles and aisles full of all kinds of books.

You already had a few books in mind that you wanted to get. Thankfully, the books on the shelves were organized in alphabetical order so they would be easy to find. When you leaned down to search through the books, a worker came up to you.

“Let me know if you need anything in particular.” She said. Her eyes went wide when you faced her, and she realized who you were. “Princess! What an honor!”

“Hello.” You smiled shyly. Her loud voice upon seeing you irritated you just a bit. “I have a few books in mind, already. But thank you.”

The worker nodded. She seemed nervous to be in the presence of a royal, especially one with very minimal public appearances. She left you alone while you got your books.

You got fantasy and romance books, mostly. You purchased them with the help of the lady you saw from earlier, then went back outside.

“Done already?” The driver said, reading a newspaper. 

“I already knew what I wanted.”

He smiled. “Get on in, then.”

When you arrived back home, you weren’t ready to go to your room just yet. So you took a stroll around the castle.

It was always busy with people doing things. You found it fun to people-watch. Your strolling led you to the area where the knights reside.

More specifically where some of them train one on one. A room filled with swords and other equipment. You peeked inside, and your heart skipped a beat.

Hollis, the knight from yesterday, was inside practicing. He didn’t have his armor on, so you saw his figure. He was slender, but still had some muscle. You watched him fling around the big sword he always carried. His moves were so calculated. His body moved along with it. His hair fell over his face.

When he moved his blonde hair out of his face, he noticed you. You jumped a bit when his eyes met yours, that were peeking around a corner.

“Hey there.” He smiled. His eyes had a kind look in them. “That you, Princess?”

“Yes.” You moved out from your hiding spot, shyly putting your hands behind your back.

“What a pleasure.” He put the sword in his sheath. “What brings you here? Quite rare to see you two days in a row.”

“Just walking around.” You answered him. “How are you so good at that?”

“What, this?" He pointed to his sword. “My father taught me how. Been swinging swords around since I was a child.”

“Was your father a knight too?”

“Yup. Not in this town, though. He moved us here when he left.”

“Cool.” You nodded. 

He smirked. “How long have you been spying on me?”

Your face went a little red from prolonged conversation with a male around the same age as you. It was exactly like the romance books you read. “Not long.”

“Well. I don’t mind, either way. I take any chance to show off.” Hollis grabbed his sword out of the sheath and struck the practice dummy on one side of the room. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Now that you’ve noticed Hollis, it was like every time you left your room you caught a glance of him. He was hard to miss. 

And he never left your mind. Not after he kissed your hand at the ball and your interaction in the training room.

The next time you interacted with him, you were in the courtyard taking a stroll through the garden. It was a calm afternoon. The gardner was tending to the flowers, making sure all of them were in their best state. 

You walked down the stairs to the other section of the garden. On the way down, your foot missed a step.

“Oh sh–” You yelped. Everything happened at once. You thought you were going to land flat on your face, until you felt the arms of someone catching you.

You looked up. It was Hollis. 

“Gotta watch where you’re going, Princess.” He smirked.

“Thank you.” You replied breathlessly, laughing nervously. “What are you doing here?”

“Knightly duties.” He shrugged. He was carrying a bag full of something.

“I see.” You were still a bit flustered from how he grabbed you. “Sorry to bother you.”

“You’re not bothering me. I was just passing by.” He leaned on the railing by the steps. You walked closer to him, still wanting to continue the conversation. 

Hollis’ eyes focused on you. He could hardly believe how close he was.

“So, what are you doing out here? I didn’t know the king let you out this far.”

“He lets me take a stroll through the garden sometimes. I just like seeing all the flowers.” You motioned to the madonna lilies above you. “It’s very beautiful.”

“Yeah, it is.” He said. You noticed his eyes were still on you, barely even glancing at the flowers.

“Um…” You fiddled with your fingers, blushing under his gaze. You weren’t really the best at conversation.

He chuckled low, reading the situation. “I gotta get back to work. Nice talking with you, Princess.” 

You stood in the same spot while he walked away. You let out a large breath you were holding. You swore your heart rate was record fast the entire time. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

The next time you saw him, you were spying on him training again. And like before, he noticed you.

“You should start announcing your presence. Scared me.”

“I want to try.” You said, pointing to his sword.

“This?” He held his sword up. 

You nodded, walking close to him.

“Princesses aren’t really supposed to fight, you know.” He handed you the sword.

“It doesn’t matter.” You took a good look at it. It was pretty heavy. You’d be able to use this to defend yourself, but not in the smooth way that Hollis does. You tried an experimental slash through the air and nearly knocked yourself over.

“Woah, be careful. You almost chopped my arm off!” He laughed. He got behind you and fixed your form. “Wield it like this. Doesn’t that feel better?”

“Yes.” He was so close to you. You looked next to you, and his handsome face was right there. You quickly broke eye contact. He let out a chuckle at that.

“Why are you so nervous around me?”

“I’m not nervous.” 

“You can’t even look at me. Am I that ugly?”

You audibly laughed at that. “No, no!”

“Something else then?” The bass of his voice vibrated through your ears. You looked beside you again, and his face was closer.

You lowered the sword, and his hands traveled from your arm to your waist. A chill went up your spine. It felt like the romance books you read. The quiet moment right before the female lead is about to kiss the male lead. 

You were broken out of your trance when you heard footsteps. Both of you quickly separated from each other. You were right to do so, because the footsteps belonged to your father. 

“(Y/n)! What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in your room, doing lessons with Cecily right now?” The king asked. His voice wasn’t full of anger, but rather surprise and confusion seeing his daughter in the knights section of the castle. It wasn’t a common sight. 

“That ended a while ago, Father…” You muttered, embarrassed to be slightly scolded in front of Hollis. 

“She was just passing by and decided to say hello. Your daughter is quite a curious soul, she was watching me train.” Hollis covered for you. “I was waiting for you.”

Your father has one on one lessons with the knights sometimes, as he is very skilled in swordfighting. “Alright, well it’s good to see that you’re warming up.” Your father turned to you. “My daughter shall be off.”

You sighed, starting to walk out of the training room. What your father says, goes. Hollis watched you leave. When your father’s back was turned, you gave him a quick wave. He smiled at you. 

“Your daughter is a very nice young lady.” Hollis said to your father.

“Well, of course she is. She’s my daughter.” The king answered smugly. “She did not interfere with your training?”

“She was just peeking at me while on her stroll.” 

“Peeking at you from the inside?” The king said inquisitively.

Hollis' tongue went in his cheek. “She got startled when I noticed her. She came in just to get a close look at the sword. Nothing more.”

The king nodded slowly. “Alright. Just making sure. She’s gotten more rebellious as of late. She just wants to wander everywhere and do everything but her princess duties.” He laughed. 

Hollis laughed along with him. Deep down, he felt a little bad. He seemed like such a strict father. That had to be hard to deal with.

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Little by little, Hollis became your second best friend after Charlotte. You kinda felt like an asshole being attracted to Hollis when Charlotte had a crush on him too.

You were in the dining hall surrounded by Charlotte and some of your other aristocrat girl friends, and the knights table was across from you. Hollis kept stealing glances at you.

“Hollis keeps looking over here.” Charlotte whispered to you. “I might be imagining things, but I swear he’s looking at you.”

You looked at her. “No. It’s you he’s looking at, surely.”

She pursed her lips and furrowed her eyebrows in doubt. “Oh come on. You don’t have to do that.”

“Do what? Don’t you like him?”

“I do, but I know I don’t stand a chance with him.” Charlotte looked over again. “See! He’s looking at you!”

Hollis' eyes were indeed on you. When your eyes met, he waved. You waved back. His entire table was bantering about something, so they didn’t notice his interaction with a literal princess. 

Charlotte’s mouth was open. “Okay. There’s something you’re not telling me. Come on.” She stood up, motioning for you to go by the door to talk for a second. You stood up as well.

“Where are you guys going?” One of your friends asked. Her name was Isabelle.

“Just going to chat for a second. Be right back.” You said.

When Charlotte was certain nobody was around the two of you, she started talking. “Why didn’t you tell me you've been talking to Hollis?”

“I’m not–”

“(Y/n). I’m not stupid. I’ve heard the rumors.”

“There’s rumors?” Your eyes widened. It would not be good for Hollis if those rumors reached your father.

“Some people spotted you going in the direction of the knights section of the castle whenever it’s Hollis’ day of training. People talk.” Charlotte threw her hands up. “So, what's the truth? Just a coincidence?”

You sighed. “It’s true. We’ve become friends. But I didn’t immediately tell you because that’s your crush! I didn’t want you to feel bad.”

“Nooo, it’s fine! You know me, he’s not even my only crush.”

“You cannot tell anyone, okay? Especially my father.”

“I won’t. Lips are sealed.” Charlotte made a zipping motion with her hand by her mouth. “But, how is he? Is he a pompous ass?” She referenced the first thing you said about him.

“Surprisngly, no. He’s really nice.” You smiled to yourself, thinking about it. “Can I tell you more later? I’m still hungry.”

“I was going to say the exact same thing.” Charlotte giggled. “Yes. Talk later.”

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Words couldn’t describe the adrenaline rush you got from sneaking around the castle just to hang out with Hollis.

Right now, you were on a stroll like usual. But in the direction of where the horses were kept. Where Hollis currently was, with his horse.

When you arrived there, he was tending to it. It was a blonde, white horse. It kind of reminded you of him, they looked similar. He brushed the horse’s mane. His hair fell slightly on his face.

“Hello.” You said, opening the fence. The fence made a loud noise that made him turn around instantly.

“There you are. Come here, I want you to meet Apollo.” He grinned, petting his horse.

You walked up to him, pulling your dress up a bit so it wouldn’t be dirtied by the ground. You extended a hand out to pet his horse. “His mane is so soft.”

“It’s ‘cause I take such good care of him. Do you have a horse?”

Your face fell a bit. “No. It would stay here if I did, not ever to be used. I wish I had one though.”

“Wanna try riding him? He’s a nice horse, real calm. Not gonna throw you off or anything.”

“I’m kind of rusty…”

“It’s okay, just get on. I'll help.”

Hollis helped you onto the horse. He got on right after, putting his hands on your waist. You never noticed how big they were until you looked down and saw them around your body.

“Alright, now just grab on the reins.” 

You jumped a bit when the horse started to slowly move. The last time you were on a horse was when you were around thirteen years old. It felt nostalgic.

“See, he’s nice.” Hollis smiled at you.

“He is nice.” You pet the horse as it trotted around. “He’ll be gone with you tomorrow?” 

Hollis was going on a short expedition tomorrow with the rest of the Tenflower army.

“That’s right. I won’t get to see you for a few days.” He sighed, putting his head on top of yours. “That’s gonna suck.”

You giggled at his phrasing. “It will. But perhaps it is a good thing, I’ve been behind on my studies because of you.”

“Well, don’t ask me for help. There’s a reason why I’m a knight and not a scholar.”

After a few laps around the area, Hollis helped you off of the horse. “Well. I suppose I should let you get back to studying.”

“Please come back safe.” You looked up at him through your eyelashes.

Hollis blew air out of his nose and smirked. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it.” He was right. He wasn’t the top ranked knight for nothing. You had nothing to fear.

Desire panged through you at those words. You grabbed at his shirt. Got a little closer. He didn’t flinch.

He could read your mind. He knew what you wanted to do, and knew you weren’t quite confident enough to do it. So he took the lead. 

Your very first kiss had a horse watching. 

It was funny to think about. But the kiss with him could've been anywhere, and you would've felt the same way. His lips were so soft. He grabbed your chin so gently.

When you both pulled off of the kiss, he immediately smiled from ear to ear at your flushed face. You were speechless, feeling so many emotions at once.

“Better get going, princess.” 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Lying awake that night, you replayed that moment with Hollis over and over in your mind. You couldn’t believe how perfect it was. You’ve dreamed of a romance like the one you read in books for years. And you got it.

You caressed your lips. You craved another.

You thought about telling Charlotte, but this was something you absolutely had to keep secret. It’s too risky. As much as you trusted her. 

It being a romance that only you and him knew about almost made it better. More intimate. Special.

You put your hand on your chest, feeling your heartbeat. 

This was it, really. You could never go back from this point. Regular friends don’t kiss each other. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

When Hollis came back, you got the courage to tell him to meet you at one of your secret hideouts in the castle.

Through one of the many rooms inside of the castle was a staircase behind a bookcase that led to a small part of the rooftop.

You sat with him up there. The walls were so high up that nobody could see the two of you.

Naturally, you took the opportunity to kiss again.

You could tell he was experienced. You, on the other hand, weren’t. 

He giggled at how you kissed. So eager yet clearly inexperienced. “Easy, there.” He spoke softly, with a hint of a laugh in his words. “So cute.” He muttered under his breath, leaning in to kiss more. His tongue entered your mouth, but it didn’t feel gross at all. You welcomed it.

You melted under his touch. It felt so good, it made you forget you weren’t supposed to be doing this in the first place.

Hollis had you on his lap on the ground. Your light pink dress looked brighter as it fell over his dark pants. 

His hands went on your thighs. You pulled off of the kiss when they trailed under your dress. “U-Um…”

He winced. “Sorry. You didn’t like that?” 

“It’s not that I didn’t like it, but…” 

“No need to explain yourself. It’s okay.” He spoke softly. It comforted you. “Still wanna kiss?”

You nodded. He smirked and leaned in again, locking your lips together. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Hollis didn’t tell his friends about the developments of your guys’ relationship either. 

They did notice he was acting differently. But they didn’t really know why. They had their suspicions, though.

Hollis, Ain, and Simon were all hanging out in Ain’s room. Simon and Ain were playing cards, and Hollis was on the bed reading a book.

“That’s rare for you.” Ain said.

“Yeah. I thought you didn’t like books.” Simon said. 

“I changed my mind.” Hollis said, flipping the page. “Sometimes that happens.”

Ain and Simon looked at each other. Not much is known about the princess to the general public. But what is known is that you’re a total bookworm. 

They both giggled, knowing that they were thinking the same thing.

Hollis furrowed his brows and dropped his book. “What, you guys think me reading is funny?”

“No, no. Continue, sir.” Ain said.

“That’s what I thought.” Hollis went back to it. 

“You guys wanna go to the bar tomorrow? I’m itching to talk to women. I’ve been around men too much lately.” Simon groaned.

“I’m down.” Ain said. “What about you, Hollis?”

Hollis turned the page in his book. “I’ll pass this time, I think. I’m not really in a bar mood. I drank too much last time.”

Ain and Simon exchanged a knowing look once again. 

“Alright. You can stay here with your books.” Ain joked. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

You kept secretly meeting Hollis. And every single encounter would involve a makeout session.

The spots got more and more risky. Something about the risk of being caught made you excited. But you still had to be careful. 

One of your encounters involved you showing Hollis where your room was after quadruple checking that nobody was in the hall to see him all the way up here.

That was how he ended up outside of your door at one in the morning. 

You were the most confused you’ve ever been opening that door on that night. A tall, wet, dark figure at this time of night would’ve made you scream immediately. You almost did until you realized who it was.

“Hollis…?” You answered the door in your night gown. His clothes dripped rainwater onto the floor.

“May I come in, princess?” He asked. His voice was hoarse. Like he had been screaming or crying.

You nodded and let him in. “Take this off, you’ll get a cold…” You took his coat, putting it on the spare hanger. “What is the matter? How did you get past the guards?”

“Don’t worry about that.” 

“I’m still confused. You’re lucky I was awake, I couldn’t sleep.” You gave a half smile.

Hollis walked up to you. He grabbed your chin, bringing your lips together. Your hands rested on his back.

He immediately deepened the kiss. He was different tonight. You couldn’t tell, and it seemed like he didn’t want to tell you why. That was okay. He could later.

You gasped in the kiss when his hand groped your breast through your gown. “H-Hollis—”

“Hm?” He acted like nothing he was doing was out of the ordinary. You whimpered when his finger rubbed your nipple through the fabric. “No good?”

“That’s not…ah—“ 

Hollis walked you both to your bed. You sat down, and he made you lie on your back as he kissed your collarbone, still playing with your breasts.

“(Y/n).” He called out your name. He usually just called you princess. “I love you. Very much.”

“I love you too.” You responded, overcome with happiness.

“That’s why I want to do this.” Hollis’ hand trailed up your thigh, agonizingly slow. “I want to make love to you. Is that okay?”

You knew the question was coming, but you still felt so shocked. “Don't people only do this when they are married...”

Hollis sighed, and went back to kissing your collarbone and neck. “When two people love each other, they do this. It feels amazing. The pleasure is out of this world. Do you not want to experience that with me? We do not have to...but I really fucking want to.”

“I want to.” You blurted out. “With you.”

“Are you sure?"

“I’m sure. I want that with you, Hollis. I trust you.” You smiled. 

Hollis grinned when he got your consent, overcome with joy. He immediately began to undress you. He unbuttoned your gown from the top. 

Your face went red when your breasts were exposed to him. His large hands cupped both of your boobs. “Beautiful.” He muttered under his breath. You yelped when his mouth went on the right one’s nipple.

“Are you sensitive here?” He asked, licking the bud.

“I-I don’t know…” 

“Does it feel good, baby?”

Your mind melted at the petname. You nodded. 

He continued sucking on your nipples. You felt your lower half pang with arousal. 

He looked incredibly hot right now. Your hand patted his blonde hair. 

When he was satisfied, he began unbuttoning the rest, until your naked body was fully on display for him. He got in between your legs.

“Don’t stare…” You put your hands on your face. Hollis was looking right in between your legs.

“How can I not…fucking beautiful.” He let out a chuckle. He couldn’t believe this was real life, and he was really in front of you like this. “Princess.” You gasped when his thumb began to trail up and down your pussy. It was so wet already from the boob sucking. “Don’t be scared, okay?”

You wondered just what he was going to do, until he lowered his head in between your thighs and you felt his tongue on your most special place. You moaned loudly immediately.

It was ticklish. You’ve never really touched yourself down there, let alone had someone lick it. You could tell this was another thing he was experienced with.

You tried not to think too hard about the other women he might have done this with. 

His tongue trailed up and down your cunt, getting it wetter than it already was. You had to put your hand over your mouth when he wrapped his lips around your clit and started to suck.

His hands held your lower half down on the bed. The sensation was so strong, you almost instinctively tried to run away. But he kept you there, and pleasure wracked throughout your body.

Your eyes rolled back when he began to move his tongue fast on your clit, wiggling it around in circles. You let out all of your noises in your hand. You would be screaming if it wasn’t there, alerting the whole castle.

“Do you like it, princess?” He looked up at you from in between your legs.

“Yes.” You answered breathlessly. “M-More…” You begged.

“You are so wet…Amazing.” He went back down, licking your entire pussy. It felt like he was doing what he usually did when he made out with you, but on your vagina. “You taste wonderful…”

Your eyelids twitched. Your lower half got warmer. You couldn’t tell what was coming. Evidently, Hollis knew as he pulled off when it was. You laid on the bed and regained your breath.

“I can’t hold back.” Hollis stood up and pulled his pants down. What came out was a penis. You never saw one in real life before. You sat and stared at it. 

Hollis began to stroke himself. You didn’t really have a reference point, but he seemed…big. You swallowed nervously. 

He noticed your worried face. “It will be okay.” He stroked your leg. “It will feel good.”

Hollis spat on his hand and lathered it over his cock. When he angled the tip to your small, virgin entrance; It finally hit you what was about to happen. The tip felt bigger when it was near there.

“Ready?” He asked.

You bit your lip and nodded. You’ve wanted this for so long. It’s only natural. If your parents didn’t find out, it’s not like you’re doing anything wrong. You love Hollis, and he loves you. This is what people in love do. 

When Hollis began to push in, you didn’t have time to cover your mouth before you cried out loudly in pain.

“A-Aaah—!” You gripped the sheets behind you.

He pushed in more, and a drop of blood fell onto the sheets below. To go from being completely closed to being opened like this, it would’ve been worrying if there was no blood. 

You panted heavily. It hurt. Really bad. You wondered just how this was supposed to be pleasurable. It felt like you were being split in two.

You looked down, and he was still barely half way in. 

“Do you want me to stop?” He leaned down, caressing your cheek. His face was full of guilt.

You shook your head, determined to take him all. He pushed in more. He was so deep.

You gasped and shook, grabbing his back when he was fully inside. 

“I’m in.” He leaned down to kiss your face. He kissed the tears forming in your eyes. “You feel so amazing. Oh my God.” 

You grimaced when he started moving a little faster than you could take at the moment. “Please…go slower.”

“Right. I’m sorry. Are you okay?”

“Mhm. You’re all the way inside.”

“That I am.” He chuckled. He put his forehead on yours. 

He began speeding up bit by bit. He started thrusting at a different angle, and all of the sudden waves of pleasure started to go through you body. “Mm…what is that?”

“What’s what?”

“That place. Ah—!”

Hollis started focusing on rubbing the tip there. “Here? You like it here?”

“Yes. Feels...good.” You moaned. Your nails scratched his back as he started going faster, focusing on that spot. 

“Ahh. Shit. I’m gonna cum so quick. You’re so tight and warm.” He rambled. 

You squeezed around him every time he hit that spot. Hollis let out sounds of pleasure every time you did that. 

An unfamiliar feeling in your tummy began to spread. It was so new to you. Of course, from what you’ve learned in your studies, it was an orgasm. You’ve never had one. But you assume this was what they were talking about. The cock in your pussy was pushing you towards something.

You wrapped your legs around his waist. He sped up even more. The pain of the stretch mixed with the pleasure of what he kept poking at was unbelievable. 

“I-I’m…” You could barely speak. It was coming, and coming fast.

Hollis could tell you were close. You looked like you were malfunctioning. And your pussy kept squeezing. “Going to cum?” He licked his hand and brought it to your clit.

You whined at that. The combination of him pounding your pussy and rubbing your clit was too much. Your moans got higher and higher until you finally went over the edge.

Your eyes rolled back and you bit into Hollis’ shoulder and orgasmed for the very first time. Your hips shook violently and you screamed into his shoulder.

It was incredible, the pleasure beyond your comprehension. You swore it lasted several minutes. Hollis kept thrusting inside, seemingly close to cumming too.

He panted under his breath. “Fuck, I'm cumming—” One last thrust and the dam broke. Ropes and ropes of semen painted your walls. 

When he was done, he collapsed into your arms. Your virginity was gone. It was a bittersweet feeling. You know you likely shouldn’t have done this, but you loved Hollis too much to care.

You kissed sloppily, his cock still in you. Your mind was clouded with love and lust. It felt so, so good.

The corner of his lips rose up when he felt your body start to move again on him. He was still hard.

You looked right in his eyes. “I want to do it again.”

You had to bite back several loud moans with you now on top of him. You rode him to the best of your ability, grinding your hips.

Below you, he watched in awe. In such a short time you became so hungry for his sex. It was a wonderful sight. The innocent princess was now completely naked on top of him. He was naked now, too.

You let out a guttural moan when he started thrusting up from below. He held you in the air and started pounding.

You panted with each thrust. He wasn’t being gentle like before, but it still felt so good. You wanted more.

“More.” You asked him, leaned over by his ear. “Please, harder.”

“Yeah? You want more, princess?”

You nodded. Your eyes were teary from the pleasure.

“Get on the bed. All fours.”

You got off of his cock and obeyed his instructions. He got behind you, angling his cock at your entrance with his hands on your hips. 

You whimpered loudly as he thrusted in all at once. “Ah…you’re so tight, baby. I’m so lucky.” 

You arched your back and gripped the sheets. He pounded you hard, making the bed creak just a bit. You blushed at the sound of his balls slapping against your pussy and his hips against your butt.

Your tongue hung out by itself with the sensation of his balls hitting your clit while he fucked you deep. 

You were going to cum again. Your breaths got heavier. “I-It’s coming!! Don’t stop!”

“Not stopping. Don’t run from it.” Hollis kept his pace. “Cum on me, princess.”

Your eyes rolled back once more. You creamed on his cock, biting the sheets to not make any more noise. The sex sounded wetter now that you have cum twice.

You winced in overstimulation when he kept going. 

“I’m almost there, ‘m sorry.” He gripped your hips and went faster, chasing his orgasm. He thrusted all the way in when he came, not letting a single drop of cum leave.

He collapsed on the bed next to you. You looked over at him.

His hair was sweaty, his face was flushed. You didn’t realize how hot he looked naked. He had abs. It wasn’t a surprise, most knights did. But seeing it in person right next to you, after you’ve just made love with him was different. 

“Staring at me?” He opened one eye.  

You grabbed his dick. It was half hard now. You wanted it to be fully hard. 

“You want it again, baby?” He chuckled. “Wow.”

You gave his cock a few strokes, and then boldly put your mouth on it.

“Oh, shit.” 

You sucked on the tip. You saw this in one of the books in the library. Kama Sutra. You never checked it out, but would take sneak peeks of it when no one was looking.

You tried to fit him deeper into your mouth but gagged and pulled off. That scared you. You tried again though, trying not to hit the back of your throat.

Hollis’ hand patted your head. He stroked your hair, it greatly relaxed you.

He was fully hard again. Which meant you could go again.

Something about this activity you couldn’t get enough of. Now that you’ve got it, you wanted more and more until you couldn’t take it anymore.

Hollis fucked you from behind in a spooning position on the bed. It was slower this time, but pleasurable all the same.

He whispered sweet nothings in your ear, rubbing your nipple as he fucked slow.

Despite the slow pace, you already felt like you were going to cum again. He grabbed your cheek and put your mouths together. He held you and kept going until both of you came together. You gasped into his mouth.

After that, you almost immediately fell asleep. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Hollis stayed awake. He watched your chest rise up and down. You looked so peaceful sleeping. So beautiful.

The light shone through the window now. He ran his hand through your hair. He knew he had to leave now. He would’ve loved to stay and wake up with you. 

He got up from the bed, and put his clothes back on. They were scattered on the ground by your bed. You got your coat off of the hanger by the door as well. 

He took one last look at you on the bed, before leaving.

He tried his absolute hardest not to be spotted. He sighed in relief once he saw the exit to the knight’s quarters being empty. Once he walked through it, he jumped violently at the sudden sound of swords being drawn, and a gruff voice.

“Stop right there!”

Hollis pursed his lips and turned around, with his hands up. It was the guards of the castle.

“Sir Hollis. You know the rules, correct?” The one in the middle held his sword up to Hollis’ neck.

“I do.”

“Then you do know it is severely punishable to sneak into the castle at night, into the princesses’ chambers?”

Busted. Hollis couldn’t help but smile to himself in defeat. 

“What, you think this is funny? It’s punishable by death.”

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

When you awoke, the castle was louder than usual. You heard hurried footsteps outside of your door and chatter outside of your window.

You yawned and rubbed the sleep out of your eyes. You looked down. You forgot last night wasn’t a wonderful dream. It was reality. 

You didn’t have much time to reminisce before your mother came bursting into your room. You held your covers over yourself, as you were still naked. 

“Darling, are you okay?” She cooed, coming to your bed and bringing you into a hug.

“Yes, why?”

“A knight snuck into the castle after hours. Cecily said she saw him in here, touching you. Are you hurt?”

She was talking about Hollis. Your heart dropped. They caught him. You shook your head.

“Let me see, maybe you are and you don’t realize it.” She pulled at the covers. You kept them up. “Sweetie, just let me–”

You had a brief tug of war session with the covers of your bed, until your mother’s strength overpowered yours and she saw all of you. 

You had no clothes on. But what she noticed more was the red stain on the sheets. “What’s this?”

“Mother, he did not hurt me.” 

Her face changed when she realized the situation. “You…”

“He didn’t. Hollis is innocent.”

“‘Hollis?’ Who is Hollis?”

“The knight. Who came in my chambers last night. I let him in. He meant no harm. I…I love him.”

Her face contorted in confusion. It eventually changed to anger. She raised her hand and slapped you across the face. You sat there in silence, your head still in the direction that she slapped you in. 

“(Y/n). I don’t know if you know this, but you’re a princess, not a whore. I let you off the hook a few times. I let you have friends of your own, that weren’t given to you by me. But to go this far…” She shook her head, and got up. “Someone is going to die because of you. Do you understand?”

Your mouth quivered at that. ‘Die.’ They were going to kill him? How did they even know, how did Cecily see him? She’s usually never awake at that hour.

“Mama, no. Do not kill him!” You teared up.

“Better go tell your father that. He’s furious. He believes that you were forced by him. I don’t know if I have the heart to tell him you weren’t.”

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Hollis grunted in pain with each lashing to his chest. He was stripped down to his underwear, restrained to the ceiling.

Your father was relentless. As soon as he found out the situation, he didn’t hold back. His daughter had been defiled. It was something that made him more mad the 

“How does that feel? The weight of your sins.” He yelled. “Forcing my daughter like this…I almost want to kill you slowly, instead of letting you off easy with the guillotine. What do you think?”

“I didn’t force her.” Hollis said. His voice was hoarse.

“What was that?”

“I didn’t force her.” Hollis forced himself to be louder. 

“Bullshit. My daughter would never have done this. She’s a good girl. You…corrupted her.” He lashed Hollis once more. “I knew I was right to be suspicious of that time in the training room.”

“I didn’t do any of the sort. Your daughter is in love with me, as I am with her.”

“Delusional. Absolutely delusional.”

Hollis laughed, coughing a little at the end. “Why don’t you ask her yourself? How I made love to her for hours.” He was intentionally provoking him. Probably wasn’t a good idea, but he was bored. 

The king’s eye twitched. He hit Hollis once more with his whip. Hollis groaned in pain again. 

“You’re not going to kill me. You need me. That army is worthless without me in the forefront, and you know it.” Hollis continued to provoke him. 

He spat out a laugh. “Everyone is replaceable.” 

“That applies to everyone in that army but me. You’ve said that before. Don’t take it back now just ‘cause you’re angry.”

The king walked over to the table, getting out a gag. “You talk too much. This’ll shut you up.”

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Your face was stained with tears. You waited for what felt like hours until your father was done torturing Hollis. Once you heard he was free, you rushed to his office.

“Father!” You cried out once you got in. Your father was sitting in his chair with a grimace on his face. 

“My daughter…say it is not true.” 

“What?” 

“That knight, he swears that you and him are in love and that your interaction last night was not forced. He’s delirious.” Your father scoffed. 

“That is…what I came here to tell you. Father, please do not kill him. He meant no harm. It was my fault, I let him in.”

He shook his head with his eyes closed. “He broke a rule. The only punishment is death.”

“No!” You screamed. “Don’t, please. I beg you!” Tears streamed down your face once more. 

Your father couldn’t say no to your face. Ever since you were a child, in situations like these you could get what you want if you begged enough.

“You really love this knight so much?” He sighed.

You looked up at him and nodded. “So much that I want to marry him.”

“Marry…” Your father scoffed, letting out a cold laugh. “He is nowhere near fit for your hand in marriage. Not anywhere near. But…” Your father leaned on the wall, thinking to himself. “If he really means that much to you…I will think about it.” 

“Oh, father, thank you!” You let out a huge breath in relief. 

“He will still be punished, though. He’s not getting off easy, just because you for some odd reason see him fit to be your husband.”

Your father left the room, and slammed the door behind him. 

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

Hollis was in a cell. It was pretty boring. All there was, was an uncomfortable bed and a toilet that looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in decades. 

He had a lot of time to think about what was going on. It had been a few days since he got caught. He tried not to focus on it too much. Oddly enough, despite the gravity of the situation, he was still happy.

He was happy he got to make love to you. Happy that he was in love, and you loved him back. He could die happy, if it just meant that he was in your heart for years to come.

His daydreaming ceased when he heard footsteps. He thought he would be taken back to the torture room, but saw two familiar figures instead.

“Ain. Simon!” He let out a laugh and got up, going to where they were at the front of the cell.

“You are absolutely fucking insane.” Ain laughed. His face was filled with worry, still.

“How…how did you do this?” Simon asked.

“It’s a long story.” Hollis said. “Does…everybody know?”

“They don’t know the full extent. People were told that a knight snuck into the castle, not that it was you or that you fucked the princess in the process.”

Hollis let out a sigh of relief. That was good. He was feeling a little embarrassed, thinking of the possibility of the entire town hearing about it in full.

“Will you both be at the trial?” 

“Of course.” Ain said. 

“Listen.” Hollis started. “I’m sorry for not listening to you guys. But I’m in love with her. I couldn't hold back my feelings. She loves me, too. The king won’t accept that, but I'm telling the truth.” He looked back and forth from Simon to Ain. 

They both looked at him with sympathetic facial expressions. 

“I…think they might kill me. If they do, I just wanted to tell you I'll forever cherish all of that time I spent with you both. You’re both my best friends. For life.” He stuck his hands out from in between the bars as far as he could. Ain and Simon walked up and held them.

An hour later, you came to his cell. He rose up so quickly from his bed when he saw you. 

“Princess.” 

“Hollis. I’m so sorry you’re in this mess.” You frowned seeing his state. He was physically roughed up. You could tell he was in pain, from whatever your father did to him in the torture room.

“It’s my fault. Do not blame yourself.” Hollis stuck his hands out from between the bars. You grabbed both of his hands.

You felt tears coming again. “I’ve brought good news.”

“And what’s that?” 

“I convinced my father to let you live.”

“Oh, thank God.” He sighed happily, hanging his head. 

“Your trial will still end in a punishment, though. I told him how I wanted to…marry you.”

“You want to marry me?” He said softly. He was surprised by that. 

“Yes. I don’t know how that will change the sentencing but…” You smiled, a tear falling off of your chin. “You won’t die. I won’t lose you.”

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

You sat by your mother for the sentencing. You hadn’t talked to her in a while ever since she slapped you. Her usual comforting presence now felt very cold. Her gaze felt like you were being judged.

Hollis was in the middle of the court room, handcuffed to the chair. The judge listed all of Hollis’ crimes. How he came into a 

Your father was pacing in front of him. While there was a judge, your father ultimately decided the outcome. 

“You will not die. You can thank the princess for that. However," Your father started, standing right in front of him. Hollis looked up at him. Despite his life kind of being on the line, he didn’t look that worried at all. “If you want to regain my trust and prove your loyalty, I want you to go up to Tenflower hill and slay the dragon there. Alone. And come back with it’s head.”

Murmurs exploded around the room. Your heart and face dropped. You thought he would get off with doing time in the jail, or mandatory service around the castle. Not…this.

Everyone knew it was a death wish. He could've sentenced Hollis to death, and the outcome would likely be the same.

Not even groups of people all together could defeat that dragon. Years ago, a group of knights went there to slay it in the promise of a cash prize. Not a single one of them came back from it.

“Can I bring my horse?” That was Hollis’ only reply. His face didn’t falter.

You stared at him in disbelief. Did he know just how fucked he was? His face still had that confident look on it, identical to the one he had on his face the very first time you laid eyes upon him in Tenflower square. 

“You may.”

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

The very last time you saw Hollis, he was with his horse. The same horse he had you ride in one of your many encounters. The same horse that watched you have your first kiss.

You weren’t alone in watching him leave. His friends, Ain and Simon had seen him off. You were watching from above.

The night of when he left, Charlotte came to your room. “(Y/n).”

You turned around on the bed. Your face was stained with tears. Your mouth in a frown.

“Oh, (y/n).” She came to your bed and pulled you into a hug. “What have you gotten yourself into, huh?”

“You know everything?” It has been a while since you’ve had a conversation. People talk, like she said before. She must know the story by now.

She nodded. 

“Mother told me I'll never see Hollis ever again.” You sobbed into her shoulder. “Everyone else is saying it too, that–...that he’s a goner.”

Charlotte didn’t say anything. She just rubbed your head. There was nothing she could say and be 100% certain about it.

“Do you think he’ll come back?” You asked, looking up at her.

Charlotte’s mouth hung open. She didn’t have the right words. “There’s a possibility.”

“I’d rather he just died here, if father was going to order that. At least…I’d know.”

You cried into Charlotte’s arms for a bit. She was truly a great friend. You regretted not telling her about this sooner, and that she had to learn from the chatter of the townsfolk. 

She slept over that night. It was probably supposed to be awkward that she was sleeping in your bed, and had her arms around you, but it wasn’t. It made you feel a whole lot better.

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

two weeks later…

“Dinner’s ready, (y/n). Do you want me to bring it up here?” Cecily knocked on your door.

“Yes.” You shouted from your room.

It’s been two weeks since Hollis left. It felt like forever. To be honest, you didn’t want to give up hope. But everyone around you had. It was hard to keep believing in something when everyone else didn’t.

You didn’t leave your room like before. You stayed holed up in there. Cecily started to bring food up to your room when she realized you weren’t coming down to the dining hall like before. 

You didn’t have it in you to be truly mad at her, even though it was her fault Hollis was gone. After all, it was her job to protect you. She had no prior context to the situation.

You were depressed. Charlotte visited you often, coming up to your room to talk to you about her day. You enjoyed listening to it. It took your mind off of things. Her life was pretty eventful. She made you laugh for the first time in forever. 

But when she was gone, it went back to before. Thinking about him. You wish you could’ve spent more time with him before this happened. You didn’t regret that night at all, but it was agony now that he wasn’t here. You craved his touch. His touch that you may never feel again.

You let out a shaky sigh. You’ve already cried so much, no more tears came out. You had dark circles on your face from not sleeping as often. The only thing that truly brought you some form of happiness was your books, per usual.

You avoided the romance ones for now.

.⋅˚₊‧ 🜲  ‧₊˚ ⋅

A few days later, you finally got the courage to leave your room again. You realized that staying in it for too long was making you feel worse.

You were sitting by the castle entrance, sipping tea, and eavesdropping on nearby people. Your hearing was oddly good for this type of stuff.

Two of the guards were talking about something. Castle duties. One sentence caught your attention.

“Do you see someone walking there?” The guard pointed outside.

“No?”

“Look closer. Looks like he’s carrying a dragon’s head, or something.”

You stood up straight from your seat and almost broke your neck looking outside. The figure was walking extremely slowly. It did indeed look like a figure with a dragon’s head. But they were too far away to really see it.

It’s not until they came into view that more guards started to look. The person was visibly limping, bloody, and also had a horse with them.

…It couldn’t be. You had already given up hope, leaving you no choice but to go back to the life you lived before you ever knew of his existence. 

But as he got closer, you saw a glimpse of his blonde hair. You knew there was only one person it could be.

“It’s Sir Hollis!” One of the guards shouted, making the whole hall erupt in noise as everyone realized who it was.

You were speechless. You almost thought it was a dream. But no, as the figure came closer, you realized it really was Hollis. He had done it. 

The guards and everyone in the castle waited by the entrance. Moments later, your father came down after being alerted of the situation. His face was doubtful at first, until he got a good look.

“Impossible.” He muttered, glancing at you for a second. He bursted through the front door.

Hollis was closer now. You got a good look at him. He was covered in dry blood, it was hard to tell if it was his or the dragon’s. He was completely exhausted, and so was his horse. When he looked up and saw all of you standing there, especially you, he stopped and collapsed to the ground.

Gasps erupted. You pushed back the crowd of people and ran towards him.

“(Y/n)!” Your father yelled. You ignored him.

“Hollis…” You whispered, kneeling down to where he was on the ground. He lifted his head up to look at you like it hurt. “You’re back.”

Hollis opened his mouth to talk, and coughs came out. When he finally spoke, his voice was so hoarse. 

“I’m back.” 

He smiled after. The same smile you had missed so dearly all those days, and thought you would never see ever again.

 ꒰ঌ 🜲 ྀི໒꒱ 

𓆰♱𓆪 ⛪︎

It's not that you got used to the idea of robbing or harming someone, but eventually it started to make sense. And sometimes, some people had it coming. Like the old man who offered help when Hollis's car died.

You were in the middle of nowhere, somewhere along the interstate in between Colorado and Utah. The nearest light you'd seen had been a gas station sign about forty minutes back, and before that, nothing — just the highway cutting through dark flatland, the kind of empty that makes you aware of how small you are. You'd been sleeping until you heard Hollis cursing and felt the car slowly pulling to a stop.

You woke to Hollis stepping out and lifting the hood to check the engine. You stepped out after him.

"Get back to the car," he said.

"No," you answered simply, and he sighed. You reached his side, looking down at the engine as if you understood any of it. "What's wrong?"

"It's probably the water — it overheated." You nodded, still with no clue. "I didn't check back in the last city."

"And what are we gonna do?" You raised your eyes to him.

"I don't know," He looked back at you with a tired stare — he'd been driving the whole night. "I'm calling a tow truck."

Half an hour went by with Hollis trying to get through to a tow truck. You honestly didn't even know how far you were from the nearest town, but judging by the landscape — stretches of grass and the odd solitary property sitting dark and still in the distance — you figured it was far. It was also the first time in quite a while that you'd seen Hollis using his phone; most of the time it stayed off, and he made you keep yours off too.

"Fuck," he roared at the screen, about to dial again when you stepped closer.

"We can sleep in the car tonight and look for help tomorrow." You reached for his face, both hands cupping it gently, fingers brushing his cheekbones. His gaze softened as soon as he met your eyes, and he smiled — softly.

"Sounds good," he said, and you smiled back.

He left the backseat for you. You didn't want to sleep in comfort without him, but he insisted he was too big for the backseat anyway — though truthfully, he was too big for the front seat too. Even reclining back, he had to curl into his own frame just to lay properly.

You watched him from the back, his cap pulled low, arms folded across his chest in the pale moonlight, while you searched for your own sleep. It never came. You listened to an owl somewhere far off, the wind shaking the tall grass and bending the trees, the occasional car passing down the road — none of it pulled you under. You were already resigning yourself to staying awake the whole night when the knocks came.

You heard them before you fully understood what they were. Three slow knocks, evenly spaced, like someone who'd been standing there a while before deciding to announce themselves. It immediately startled you but Hollis didn't so much as stir. You looked out the window before waking him.

The man was standing too close to the car. Not the polite distance of someone passing by who'd noticed trouble — he was right up against the glass, and he'd positioned himself so that the shadows fell across most of his face. Middle-aged, greasy, and odd-looking, to say the least. Something about the stillness of him, the way he wasn't shifting his weight or looking around the way a normal person would, sat wrong in your stomach even before he smiled.

"Holli," you called, poking him through the gap in the seats.

It took a moment, but Hollis woke. He looked for you first, then for the man knocking at his window. He reached into the glove box for his gun and kept it hidden at his hip. Only then did he lower the window — about a quarter of the way, just enough for the man to hear him.

"Can I help you?" he asked.

"Good night, son," the man said, a strange smile revealing rotten teeth. "Something wrong with the car?"

"Yeah — it just died, but I'm calling a tow truck first thing in the morning," Hollis answered, dry and suspicious.

"I see." The man looked a moment longer, then somehow found you in the backseat, past Hollis. Hollis frowned and shifted his body to block you from the man's line of sight. "My house isn't far from here. It's not safe to sleep out in the middle of nowhere."

"That's real nice of you, but we're fine," Hollis said quickly.

"I'm saying it on account of the lady — people from all over pass this road. It really isn't far, my house. And come morning I can tow your car with my own truck."

The proposal wasn't bad, and maybe you were only judging by appearances. You knew Hollis would refuse — out of pride, out of caution — but you reached for his shoulder and touched it lightly, just enough to suggest what you had in mind.

"Give us a sec," he said before closing the window in the man's face. "You're not actually thinking of saying yes, are you?"

"It's just for the night, and he said he'd help with the car," you whispered.

"He's weird," Hollis said plainly — and he was right.

"It's just that we don't even know if there's a tow service anywhere nearby." You pouted, and Hollis held your gaze for a moment. You knew that look — he was weighing it, and you were tipping the scale just by staring back.

"Fine," he said, and you kissed his cheek quickly.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

The stranger's truck smelled like an old house and something dairy you couldn't quite name. It was a three-seat cabin, and Hollis positioned himself in the middle, between you and the man — when you'd moved to climb in first, he'd caught you by the waist and put you by the window instead.

You were nearly asleep again before long, head resting on Hollis's shoulder while the stranger talked at him. You paid no attention to the conversation, only to Hollis's hand resting on your leg and yours settled over his.

Until you heard it.

"Is she your sister? Or girlfriend? No offense," the man said.

"My wife," Hollis said, and you pressed back the smile, squeezing his hand instead.

"Wife? Aren't you a little young for that?"

"Not really — we met in college a few years back and married as soon as we graduated." He was flat-out lying, just for the fun of it.

"And where are you headed?"

"Arizona. Small town called Bisbee — visiting her family." You had to fight not to laugh.

"City folk meets a small-town girl and ties the knot quick — I can see why, honestly." The man laughed. Hollis didn't.

"She's a good girl." His hand tightened around your leg — possessive and protective in equal measure.

The man went quiet for a moment, eyes back on the road, and then almost to himself: "Yeah, the good ones you gotta hold onto. Things have a way of — disappearing, if you're not careful."

Something about the way he said it made you open your eyes. But his expression in the rearview was unreadable, and Hollis's thumb had started moving slow circles on your knee, and you told yourself it was nothing.

The house wasn't far, no more than a twenty-minute drive down a side road — a wooden house, nothing unusual for the region. But it was surprisingly cozy and neat inside. The man showed you to the guest room, and you felt the tension leave your shoulders the moment the door closed. There was a key in the lock. Hollis turned it.

"See? We're fine," you said, watching him shrug off his jacket. When his shirt lifted at the hem, you caught the gun still holstered at his hip.

"We're really not — that guy's weird." He sounded genuinely irritated. He lay down, and you followed.

"He's gonna help us and we'll be out of here first thing in the morning." You crawled toward him. "You sleeping with that?"

You poked at the holster, meeting his eyes. He reached for the gun, lifted it, turned it over in his hand. You couldn't deny what the sight did to you — you felt it everywhere, across your skin, down your spine, and unmistakably elsewhere. When he set it on the nightstand you moved over him, one knee on either side of his hips.

"Am I your wife?" you asked, and he grinned.

"Yeah, my beautiful wife." His hand found your nape, then slid into your hair, gripping it to pull you closer.

"Just for tonight, though," you said, a pout on your lips.

"We’ll see about that" His gaze dropped to your mouth and you bit your lower lip as the grip in your hair tightened. You liked when he was rougher. You liked when he handled you like that.

He kissed you with that same roughness — relentless, his lips fitting yours with ease, his tongue taking over in a way that had you surrendered to him completely. You rested your hands on his chest, then slid them down to his abdomen, fingers grazing lightly across it.

It took no time before you were moving on top of him, grinding on his lap. The mere friction of your panties against his jeans had you whimpering against his mouth.

"Hey," he said, seriously. His other hand came to your hip, trying to steady you, but you kept moving, rolling your hips back and forth. "We can't fuck here."

"Why not?" Your voice came out frail, almost pleading.

You dug your nails into his skin as you kept moving on top of him, your pussy twitching, getting soaked by the minute.

"Fuck it," he said, his voice coming out hoarse, and you smiled at your small victory.

Hollis's grip slid up your thigh until it reached your ass, helping you move, pressing you down over his crotch. You bit your lip to keep from moaning when you felt his growing length beneath you. It felt so good against your cunt that your whole body burned with it. But it wasn't enough. Your hands rushed to unbutton his jeans and drag the zipper down. You raised your hips just enough to push his pants out of the way.

"So fucking greedy," he said, and you glanced up at him briefly. He wore that same devilish look you'd first noticed when you met him — the one you'd grown so fond of — and it made your heart skip and your cheeks flush all at once.

You went on, pulling down his underwear until his cock was finally within reach. You wrapped your hand around the base and began to stroke him slowly. You bent forward just enough to spit on his tip, wetting him so it was easier to work him with both hands. You loved how he throbbed under your touch, loved the sound of his sharp breaths, the way his chest rose and fell, the way his gaze gleamed down at you. You loved it so much.

As he watched you, you stopped and raised your hips. First you slipped out of your summer dress, then your panties, until you were completely naked in front of him. It still made your cheeks warm, mostly when he looked at you with that much attention, his heavy-lidded eyes moving over every detail of you. When you lowered yourself onto him again, you took hold of his cock once more, this time to line him up at your entrance. You said nothing, just bit into your lip to stay quiet as you sank down on top of him, his cock filling you inch by inch. It still caught you off guard — how good it felt to have him stretching you open like that.

You struggled to find your rhythm, but Hollis made it easier by taking hold of your hips and guiding you into it. Slow at first, then the two of you settled into a pace that made staying quiet feel like torture. Desperately, he grabbed you by the neck and pulled you close, kissing you so hard it drew a whimper out of you.

If you'd struggled to hold back when you were leading, the moment Hollis began thrusting up into you, you had no choice but to bury your face against his neck to muffle the sounds escaping your mouth. He wasn't faring much better — between the heaviness of his breathing and the low, hoarse sounds he made from time to time, it was clear how much it was getting to him too. His hands gripped your hips and waist so tight it ached, fingers digging into your skin without restraint, his body slamming up into yours again and again.

When the first spasm tore through you, you bit down on his shoulder — not caring whether it hurt him, just needing to keep your mouth shut somehow. Even so, you cried out and clenched tight around him. It drew a moan from Hollis, but he kept thrusting, relentless. He grew faster, his movements turning sloppy, and you knew. He tried to lift you off him, but you leaned back and sat up straight on top of him, rolling your hips as you held his gaze.

"Baby, I'm gonna—" he said, his voice wrecked, fighting his edge.

"I know," you said, low.

And you kept moving anyway — faster, grinding down on him as you felt him throbbing inside you. You pressed both hands to his chest for leverage and rode him properly.

Hollis fell back against the pillow, lips parted, hands gripping you tight, and you rode him until you felt the first of him spill inside you — just a moment, just enough to make you gasp — before he grabbed your hips and lifted you off him, finishing across your stomach with a rough, wrecked sound. The warmth of it spread across your skin and you stayed still, catching your breath, watching his chest heave. 

"You're insane," he said finally, spent.

"I'm not." You leaned down and rested your head on his shoulder. Both of you panting and slick with sweat. "It just felt so good."

He hummed and pulled you close. His kiss pressed to the top of your head was the last thing you felt before sleep pulled you under, still wrapped in his arms.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

The next morning, Hollis woke you early. You were a light sleeper, so you got up without much trouble.

"Get dressed," he said.

You nodded and did as he said, moving slowly and groggy. You cleaned yourself up, put on your dress, fixed your hair as best you could, then just waited for him.

The two of you went downstairs, his hand in yours the whole way. The man was in his living room, watering plants or something like it. He greeted you both with a wide smile, his eyes sliding over you in a way that turned your stomach, and you shifted slightly closer to Hollis.

That morning he went with Hollis to tow the car. You stayed behind and looked around — scattered the whole place, really.

You started with the basement. The staircase creaked under every step and the smell hit you before you reached the bottom — something damp and organic, like soil and something older beneath it. The space was crammed: old furniture stacked against the walls, a workbench covered in taxidermy tools and unlabeled chemicals, the kind of setup that would have made sense for a hunter if it hadn't felt so deliberate. The stuffed animals were everywhere — squirrels, rabbits, a fox with glass eyes that caught the light wrong. Along the far wall, lined up with a neatness that contrasted with everything else in the room, were women's shoes. All different styles, different sizes. You counted twelve pairs before you stopped counting. Your breathing had gone shallow without you noticing, and you stood there for a moment just listening to the silence above you before you made yourself keep moving. Beside the shoes, a wardrobe. You pulled it open and found women's clothes — a lot of them, folded or hung with care, different sizes too, as if collected over time rather than belonging to any one person. You closed it carefully, like you hadn't been there at all.

On your way back up you noticed the rocking chair positioned directly beneath the single hanging bulb — its armrests worn completely smooth, almost polished, like something had spent a long time sitting there. You didn't linger.

The living room and kitchen were just as neat and unremarkable as the night before, which almost made it worse — the contrast. You moved quickly through them, opening drawers without finding much, until you pulled open the one beside the kitchen sink. You hesitated before you looked inside, some part of you already sensing you wouldn't like what you found. A stack of Polaroids rubber-banded together. Candid shots. Women at gas stations, women walking through parking lots, one taken through what was clearly a window. None of them looking at the camera. None of them knowing. You put them back exactly as you found them and shut the drawer, and then you stood very still for a moment with your hand still resting on it, staring at nothing.

Upstairs, past the guest room, his bedroom sat at the end of the corridor. You pushed the door open slowly and the smell reached you before anything else — stale sweat and something sweet beneath it, something wrong. You breathed through your mouth and stepped in.

The walls were dense with photographs — family portraits, him alongside a woman, two children, a dog. Ordinary enough on the surface, except the woman looked hollow in almost every one of them. Not sad exactly. Hollow. Like something behind her eyes had quietly gone out. You told yourself you were projecting.

There was a vanity table against one wall that stopped you cold. Women's perfume bottles arranged in a careful row, a hairbrush with long dark hair still wound through the bristles. Unmistakably a woman's things — but nothing else in the room suggested a woman had ever lived here. You picked up one of the bottles without meaning to, turned it over in your hand, set it back down.

Beside the bed, a stack of letters tied with twine. All from the same return address, all in the same handwriting — a woman's. All unopened. The most recent postmark was only a few months old. You thought about the clothes downstairs. The shoes lined up too neatly. You thought about what he'd said in the truck — the good ones you gotta hold onto, things have a way of disappearing — and your mouth went dry.

You crouched and looked under the bed. The corner of a suitcase was just visible, fitted with a heavy padlock. You were working out how to get it open, fingers already reaching for it, when you heard the engine outside.

You ran.

You heard the truck before you saw it. You were at the front door before it had even fully stopped, and the moment Hollis stepped out you crossed the porch and walked straight into him, arms wrapping tight around him, face pressed to his chest. He said nothing — just closed his arms around you and brought one hand up to your hair, fingers moving through it slowly.

You wanted to tell him. The shoes lined up along the wall. The Polaroids in the kitchen drawer. The vanity with someone else's hairbrush. The letters, all unopened. The suitcase. The words sat right at the back of your throat — and then the man was already stepping onto the porch behind Hollis, wiping his hands on a rag, filling the silence before you had the chance.

"Got her hooked up no problem, I figure it's an easy fix, few hours at most, maybe less. Just gonna call the mechanic, he’ll be here in no time" he said, moving past you both toward the door. "You two hungry? I can make something before you head out."

"Sure," Hollis said, and you felt the word vibrate in his chest against your cheek. His fingers hadn't stopped moving through your hair.

You tilted your head just enough to look up at him. He was watching the man's back, expression neutral, but his eyes cut down to yours for just a second — brief and quiet, reading you — or trying to. You gave him nothing back. You couldn't, not yet. So you pressed closer and he let you, his arm tightening slightly at your waist.

"I remember being your age," the man said, you did not turn to look at him. "Right about your age when I met my wife."

"Is that so?" Hollis said, his tone easy, unbothered.

"Yeah. Course she was younger than your lady." You felt your jaw tighten against Hollis's chest. His fingers grazed your scalp, unhurried, and the steadiness of it kept you still. "Different time. You get me?"

"Sure," Hollis said.

"Enjoy it while it lasts is all I'm saying." He laughed — wet and nasal, an awful sound. "Soon she won't be this clingy. Won't even look at your face. I'll tell you that much."

Hollis's hand paused for just a fraction of a second in your hair. So small you almost missed it.

"My Nancy?" He used a random name as a disguise, you figured. "Doubt it. She's just soft like that."

"They're all like that at first, all over you, then running like the plague." His tone had shifted, the lightness gone from it entirely. "But what do I know? Maybe you two are the lovebird type."

You thought about the shoes. The one detail that kept coming back, quiet and insistent — twelve pairs, all different sizes, lined up like they were waiting for someone to come back for them. You pressed your face a little further into Hollis's chest and said nothing.

Hollis only hummed in response, and the air between them thickened. He kept brushing your hair back with his fingers, slow and deliberate, and you understood that he knew something was wrong — you could feel it in the way he held you, slightly closer than usual, slightly more careful — but he didn't push. He just stayed there with you, solid and warm, while the man kept talking like the silence was something that needed filling.

Tankfully, the man excused himself, said he was making breakfast, and when it was ready he called you both in. You looked to Hollis for some kind of out — you didn't even want to touch the man's food — but you sat down at the table anyway and pretended to be occupied with your plate while he talked without pause. Until knocks came at the door.

"Must be the guy," he said, pushing back his chair. "Come on."

He waved at Hollis, who stood. You moved to follow when he stopped you. "Finish eating — we'll be back soon."

So you stayed. The two of them disappeared through the door and you sat there, poking at your food, glancing around the room. You were genuinely starving, but you couldn't bring yourself to eat the scrambled eggs. You wondered if you were being unfair — maybe he was just a sad, strange loner and not the villain of some horror film. You felt a little mean for thinking it. Then you thought about the Polaroids and stopped feeling mean.

"Aren't you hungry?"

You looked up. The man was standing in the kitchen doorway.

"Woke up feeling a bit off, actually — no offense," you said, keeping your voice low and polite.

"None taken." He smiled. You hated that smile. "I think this is the first time I've actually heard you speak. That man of yours talks for you every time."

"Does he?" You laughed nervously. "I'm just shy. He knows me well."

"Yeah? He ain't the controlling type, is he? Not keeping you hostage or anything?" He burst out laughing at his own joke. It wasn't funny, and the laugh was repulsive — that same wet, nasal sound. You forced a smile so as not to be rude. You didn't feel like you had the upper hand here.

"No, he's very sweet, actually," you said.

"I'm sure he is. But with a girl like you, you can never be too careful — you know what I mean?" He was still smiling, still staring in that way that made everything in you recoil.

"I don't, actually," you said, and rose to your feet.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He waved a hand. "Just playing around."

Even so, you stayed standing, your eyes flicking to the doorway behind him. If you wanted to leave, you'd have to walk past him.

"Where's my husband?" you asked. "I'm really not feeling well."

"He's outside with the guy checking the car." He leaned against the doorframe. "No need to worry — I'll keep you company."

Your gaze moved restlessly around the room, your mind already mapping exits, weighing options. The back door through the kitchen. The window above the sink. How fast you could get past him if you ran. 

"Relax — the man's not gonna leave you here." He stepped forward, and your stomach turned over. "He ain't that dumb."

He kept coming toward you and you stepped back behind the table, keeping something between the two of you. You thought about the knife in your boot, still out in the car. You thought about how the table would only hold him off so long.

"Playing all shy now, but I heard you last night." That smile didn't move. "Bit of a freak, aren't you?"

Your eyes went wide. He kept closing the distance and you had already made the decision — the window, you'd go through the window if you had to — when a sound split through the room.

A gunshot.

A fraction of a second, and the man was on the floor, clutching his leg. You looked to the doorway. Hollis was standing there, gun in hand.

No thought crossed your mind except to run to him — and you did. But just as you neared the door, something locked around your ankle.

"You little slut!" The man groaned from the floor, one hand soaked red, now smearing blood up your leg as he grabbed higher — your thigh.

You yanked against his grip and screamed. You were twisting toward Hollis when the second shot came. This time you didn't look down. You kept your eyes on Hollis, your whole body locking up, and then you felt the grip on your thigh go slack and fall away. You weren't just startled — you were stunned, shaking, and just when you thought you couldn't move, Hollis's arms came around you. He pulled you into his chest.

"I got you. You're okay," he whispered. "Let's get out of here."

Too dazed to speak, you followed him, but at the front door you stopped. "Upstairs, under his bed, there's a suitcase with a lock on it. We could... check it."

Hollis looked at you and smiled. A proud smile. He rubbed your chin with his thumb. "Good girl."

You stood rooted at the door while he took the stairs two at a time. He was back in moments, the suitcase in hand, the lock broken open. Neither of you said anything when you saw what was inside — a bundle of women's driver's licenses held together with a rubber band, different names, different states, different faces. Beneath them, a thick fold of cash. A lock of dark hair sealed in a plastic bag. You felt your throat close. You didn't cry, didn't speak — your hand just found Hollis's arm and held it, and he let you. He took the money and left the rest. Neither of you looked inside again. You got back on the road, out of there.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

Shock wasn't even the right word for what you were. Mostly you were scared — and not for the right reasons. Every time you glanced at Hollis beside you, all you felt was dread on his behalf. A man could be dead, and all you could think about was the trouble he'd just walked into — because of you. It was all pressing in too hard, your head buzzing, the sharp smell of blood rising from your stained dress and leg, and if you'd eaten anything earlier you probably would have been sick.

"I need a shower," you said, out of nowhere. The first words you'd spoken in over an hour.

"We're almost at the next city, baby. Hang in there," Hollis said. Calm as anything. How was he so calm?

When you finally pulled into a motel your whole body loosened with relief at the thought of washing it all off. The blood, at least. Your dress was another matter — it had set too long; the stain wasn't going anywhere.

You found Hollis on the edge of the bed doing something with his gun when you came back into the room. You were toweling your hair dry, wearing nothing but one of his shirts — you always liked sleeping in them.

"What are you doing?" you asked.

"Just checking," he said, glancing up at you with an obvious look that had nothing to do with the gun. "You okay?"

"Are you okay?" you asked back.

"Me? I'm fine." He shrugged.

"How are you so calm?" You crossed the room toward him. "You just — that man could be dead."

"Probably," he said, just as plainly. "He had it coming though."

You thought about the driver's licenses. All those faces, all those names and the unopened letters and you thought — yes, he did. You knew that. And still something about the easiness of it, the way Hollis said it the same way he'd say anything, made the ground feel slightly unsteady beneath you.

"Hollis, what if—" Your voice cut out. Your throat felt dry. "What if someone comes after you?"

"I don't think anyone's going to notice that man missing anytime soon." He almost sounded amused, setting the gun aside. "He was a complete loner; told me himself when we went to get the car. No family, no kids, no friends to speak of. The mechanic said nobody in town really talked to him. They only knew him because he came in for groceries."

He said it with something close to amusement, like it was almost funny, while you'd spent the last two hours feeling like your insides had been rearranged. You exhaled slowly and stepped closer. His hands came up to meet you — your thighs, your hips, your waist. You looked down at him where he sat on the edge of the bed.

"We're fine," he said, softer now. "You're fine. That's all that matters to me."

You pouted at that and nodded. He pulled you in until you folded into his lap. He held you tight enough that you finally felt the tension begin to leave your body — and you let it, even knowing what you knew, even with the contradiction of it sitting somewhere quiet and unspoken in your chest. The man who was holding you together was the same man who hadn't flinched. You didn't know what to do with that yet. So you just held on.

"I was so scared," you said — and only then did you realize you were crying. "I don't know what would have happened if you hadn't been there."

"But I was there," he said, rubbing slow circles into your back. "And I'm here. No one's going to hurt you while I'm right here."

You held him tighter. In that moment you believed him more than you'd ever believed anything — more than any passage from the Bible your mother had made you memorize as a child. And maybe that should have frightened you too. But it didn't. It just felt like the truest thing you knew.

⚜

The three of you used to be inseparable since high school — Ally, Cathy, and you. But ever since he entered the picture, it always went like this. Friday night drinks at a bar? Forget it — only if Hollis could come. Movie night, or just getting together to catch up — if she made it at all, she wouldn't stay long, because she had to call Hollis, or because he was coming to town, or whatever excuse came next. And it wasn't because you were the only single one — Cathy also had a boyfriend and still managed to have her own life.

The thing is, sometimes you thought he did it on purpose. But no one could actually know, because ever since Ally introduced him to you, you'd kept something to yourself that last summer, you'd spent weeks hooking up with him — until he ghosted you. You didn't mind. Despite the good sex, you never really got attached to him — or so you told yourself. Of course he was extremely good-looking, handsome in every sense of the word, but he was also impossibly cocky, a little cryptic, and honestly, from the moment you first got with him, you knew he wasn't a keeper.

So it actually surprised you when your friend told you all about how romantic and sweet he was with her — how he bought her flowers and put together a whole surprise just to ask her to be his girlfriend. Properly cute. But that was Ally all right; she was some kind of angelic girl, straight out of a romance novel. She deserved all of that, and you were genuinely happy he was treating her right. At first. But then it began — him stealing all her time, controlling her schedule. She even skipped classes because of him. He had a whole other life, would never stick around, and she made every effort to follow him through it, like a puppy. It got on your nerves. 

You were fed up with it. Cathy complained too, but it didn't seem to get under her skin the way it did yours. Maybe you were too protective. And deep down, maybe you just couldn't trust him at all. The guy you'd met — he was still there, and it showed every time Ally came crying to you about his mood shifts, or when he went to parties on his trips without her. It worried you that he might hurt her. She wasn't tough like you; she wouldn't come out of it the way you had.

One random Friday, you invited her to a party — this time you even invited Hollis, since he'd be in town. She said no. He was tired from his flight, and since he was staying home, she'd take the chance to study. You rolled your eyes but let it go. You had Cathy's loyal company for the night, and the two of you headed to the said party at a club downtown — some artist event a friend of a friend had scored tickets to.

It was a really fun one. Drinks after drinks and you were loose, carefree. Later, a guy approached you — a really cute one — and you ended up making out with him in the VIP area. Everything was going well, light and easy, and you were in the middle of a conversation with Cathy, her boyfriend, and a few other people when an unmistakable figure cut through the crowd toward the DJ booth. He was remarkable enough that there was no mistaking him for someone else.

You glanced at Cathy, but she hadn't noticed. She was talking to her boyfriend, laughing, light. You thought about saying something but didn't want to ruin her mood the way it had ruined yours. You excused yourself from the guy at your side and stepped closer. Looking around, there was no sign of Ally — which made you wonder: did she even know he was there? You thought about texting her, but instead you grabbed your phone and took a picture of him. Maybe you'd need proof.

In a split second, his gaze found yours. You thought he'd back off — maybe flinch at the realization that you'd caught him there. But no. Instead, he smiled at you. Shameless. Almost amused. God, it made your blood boil. That was it. Without thinking twice, you walked straight up to him — heavy steps, body rigid. His friends were around, but you didn't care.

"Hey, y/n," he said, friendly, an arm coming around your shoulder in a brief greeting.

"Where's Ally?" you asked immediately.

"Studying, I think. Or some shit like that," he said casually, that easy look still on his face. It pissed you off.

"The fuck are you doing here, then?"

"My friend invited me, so…" He shrugged and sipped his drink.

"Does she know you're here?" You frowned.

"Guess," he chuckled.

Your mouth fell open, stunned by the nerve of him saying that to your face.

"Guess she's finding out, then," you said, turning on your heel to walk away. You'd barely taken a few steps when you felt a hand close around yours. You looked down at his grip, and he quickly released you.

"Hey, come on," he said, not so amused now. "Quit that."

"You quit that!" Your voice rose — thankfully the music was loud enough to swallow it. "You're actually disgusting!"

"Sure," he raised both hands, one still holding a beer bottle. "Can we talk somewhere else?"

"Fuck no!" you snapped, and kept walking, heading straight back toward your friends.

You had a feeling he was following you, and when you glanced back, there he was — a few steps behind, sipping his beer. "I'm not gonna force you to talk to me, but please—"

"Fine," you sighed. You looked back to where Cathy stood, still completely unaware of what you were doing.

You ended up in the alley outside the club, arms folded tight across your chest. Hollis leaned against the wall, lighting a cigarette.

"So why shouldn't I tell Ally?" you said, since he'd stayed quiet long enough.

"Because I wasn't doing anything wrong. I came to a party with some friends. That's all."

"If you're not doing anything wrong, there's no need to hide it from her," you smirked, proud of the reply.

He groaned and dragged a hand down his face. It was so pathetic — he looked like a teenage boy getting scolded.

"She doesn't even like going out! Every time I suggest we go somewhere, she'd rather stay home. I just didn't tell her because I knew she wouldn't want to come!" He came at you with that, voice calm the whole time, speaking slowly the way he always did.

"That's not true… I invited her tonight and she told me YOU were the one who was tired!"

"See?" He widened his eyes. "She didn't even tell me you'd invited us!"

"Her. I invited her." It was a lie — you had invited both of them.

"God, what is wrong with you?" He groaned again, stepping closer. You didn't like that. "Whenever I'm around, you make that…" He gestured vaguely toward your face. "…face."

"What's wrong with my face?" You stepped back.

"Nothing, really. It just makes me feel like a burden," he said, and you almost laughed at that.

"Poor Holli," you pouted in mockery. "Do I make you feel uncomfortable, baby?"

He chuckled, looked around, then looked back at you. "Why you're such a bitch? What is your problem with me, really?"

He stepped forward, and this time you stepped forward too, finger raised and pointed at him. "Wanna know my problem? My problem is you being a shit boyfriend to my best friend, monopolizing all of her time until she barely has a social life, and then sneaking out behind her back to go to some club, you sick fuck!"

"Monopolizing her time? I'm her fucking boyfriend!" He laughed in your face, and it made your skin flush hot with rage. "If she's not around your little group, it's because she'd rather be with me. That's usually how it works when you're in love with someone. Maybe your bitter ass isn't too familiar with the idea."

"My bitter ass? What the fuck do you know about me?!" You lost all composure, outrage written all over your face, ears burning. "And oh my God — how in love you must be to be lying to her behind her back! That is really my dream relationship, Hollis."

"Enough to know you're unbearable to be around," he said, losing his cool as well now — tensed up, jaw clenched, looking down at you. "Yeah, maybe that was your dream relationship. Maybe that's why it bothers you this much."

That was it. You lost it. Your eyes flickered in disbelief, mouth open, words failing you at the sheer absurdity of what he'd just said. You laughed first, then brushed your hair back.

"You think you're that important, huh?" You smirked. He smirked back.

"I don't know, baby — you tell me." You frowned at the audacity of it.

"Fuck, you're just—" And yet, even as the weight of the offense landed, you felt yourself rooted in place, his gaze dropping over you. Then he touched your waist — cautious — and you flinched, and he stopped.

You could blame the alcohol. You could blame the heat of the argument doing something to you. But in the end, you had only yourself to blame. He leaned down, and you leaned forward to meet his lips. It wasn't even slightly soft — he kissed you like he was proving a point, and you kissed him back like you were screaming every accusation you'd kept hidden. His hand gripped your waist and pulled you closer; yours flew to the back of his neck, his chest, everywhere you could hold onto him with the same urgency as your tongues fought each other.

For a moment you broke the kiss, staring at him, and he stared back as though waiting for you to explode. But you didn't. You just kissed him again — harder this time, hard enough to leave your lip swollen later. His hand slid down and grabbed your ass roughly, pulling a sigh out of you against his mouth.

"Where's your car?" you said between kisses, and he pulled back, brows raised. "Shut the fuck up."

He smirked, kissed you once more — briefly — and then guided you down the alley.

⚜

His G-Wagon had enough space to lay you down across the back seat, enough space for him to fit his face between your legs. His large hands pulled down your dress and groped your breasts while he ate you out — tongue circling your clit, then sucking on it in a way that made your back arch off the seat.

"You fucker," you cursed, reaching to pull off the beanie he was wearing just so you could grab his hair.

Soon you were rolling your hips against his mouth, desperately whimpering and crying out. You hated it — hated how good he was, hated that you were about to come on his mouth, hated that you couldn't help but roll your eyes back and shake under his grip while he kept going. No fingers. Just his mouth.

"Miss me, baby?" he asked, rising over you, kissing your breasts, then your face.

"You're so fucking annoying," you said, feeling the weight of his body settle over yours.

"And yet you're gonna let me fuck this pretty pussy of yours, aren't you?"

First you heard the zipper. Then you felt the tip of his cock rubbing against you. He pressed deliberately against your overstimulated clit, toying with it while you fought to hold back a moan.

"Just fuck me already," you tried to sound firm, but your voice came out like a plea.

He chuckled, his hand fisting your hair, tilting your face up to his as he lined himself up and slid inside. It had you biting your lip to swallow the noise — the gasp, whatever sound wanted to escape.

"So tough," he whispered against your mouth.

He began to move his hips, slowly, like he was teasing you — watching every reaction, not letting you hide from his gaze. You remembered how good he felt, but not this good. He was big, that was true, but more than that, he was good — good in the way he moved, good in the way he filled you completely only to pull back and leave you desperate to have him inside again.

"Hollis," you begged, holding onto his arms, his shoulders, scratching through the fabric of his shirt.

"What, baby?" He kissed the corner of your mouth.

"Harder. I want more," you said breathlessly, trying to hold yourself together, but you already sounded so needy.

"Ask nicely," he grinned, and you nearly groaned at him — you would have, if you weren't already whimpering.

"Please," you held his gaze, eyes bright and desperate — because you were. "Please, Holli."

Locking your eyes to his was a terrible mistake. Something inside you shifted, deep in your belly, and you could see by the way he changed too. He picked up the pace — harder, faster — still holding your hair with one hand, the other finding your breast, groping and squeezing with his rough touch. And it all felt so good: the way he drove into you, the way he buried himself so deep it had your toes curling.

The car filled with sound — both of you moaning, your bodies finding each other in loud collision, and how wet you were echoing every time he filled you completely.

You came again, shaking and whimpering. Then you chased a third, pushing him off you so he was sitting up, and you straddled him. You sank down onto his cock and rolled your hips, grinding in slow waves just to feel yourself clenching around his length — and it had him dropping his head back, eyes falling shut.

"Fucking bitch," he muttered.

You teased a moment longer before bouncing again — harder, faster — and Hollis watched like you were performing just for him. You kissed him again, desperate, feeling your body begin to unravel, and he wasn't far behind. His hand wrapped around your throat, holding you steady, and his thumb came up to trace the line of your lips — light, almost careful, a strange tenderness cutting through the heat of it all. You suck into his thumb and came undone looking at him like that. He lifted you off him and you wrapped your hand around his cock, stroking him until he came across your thighs, partly catching the hem of your dress.

He kept kissing you. You kept working him, pulling every last sound from his throat, his moans low and hoarse against your mouth, until he spilled the last of it onto your fingers. You brought them to your lips and licked them clean, earning a slow smile from him.

That quiet, wordless exchange lasted no more than a couple of minutes. Then you moved fast — off his lap, panties pulled up from where they'd been pushed down to your thighs, not a glance in his direction. The guilt came down on you all at once, heavy and suffocating. You were shaking as you smoothed your dress, ran your hands through your hair, checked your makeup in the mirror on the visor.

"Hey," he said softly, reaching for your arm, and you flinched away.

"This. It didn't happen." You looked at him — sharp gaze, voice rough with a rage that wasn't really for him. It was for yourself.

"Sure, I'm fine with that." He raised his hands. "I just wanted to make sure you're okay. I can drive you home, if you want."

For a moment you stared at him, thrown. He was really that unbothered?

"God, you're just—" The words caught in your throat. "Just don't talk to me anymore. Don't look at me — don't!"

He said nothing as you shoved the door open and stepped out of the car, walking fast through the parking lot. You thought about going back inside, back to your friends, but you couldn't face it. You called a car and went straight home.

That night you barely slept. Something felt lodged in your throat, and you felt like the worst person in the world — like you didn't even fit in your own bed. But worse than the guilt was this: you kept replaying every second of it. His touch, his mouth, his voice. Even his taste. And every time you closed your eyes, you were met with that smile of his — that easy, infuriating grin — and the low drawl that drove you mad.

Hollis couldn't be trusted. You were certain of that now. He was no good for your friend.

But then again, neither were you.

Gas stations at night always oddly calmed you. The fluorescent lights with the hint of green, the whirr of the freezers on the wall, and the faint radio playing.

You walked through the aisles, trying to figure out which chip brand you felt like eating at the moment. Tonight, you had a motel room booked to stay in for fun with Hollis. It was between that and camping, which you said no to because the amount of bugs this year was atrocious.

Hollis was pacing outside talking to someone on the phone while putting gas into the car. Without even hearing it, you could tell he was talking to that girl you kept hearing him talk to over the last few weeks.

You and Hollis have separate jobs now. You both tried your hardest to get a new one together, but ultimately ended up getting a job at two different places. At first, you were really upset. You’ve admittedly gotten codependent with him, so the idea of working without him being there too was disappointing. Over time, you realized that maybe it would be good for Hollis to meet new people without you. And it was.

Hollis had met a group of people at work that were like him. You were so glad to see that he made friends without your help. But you quickly realized that one of the friends was a girl. 

That’s who you think he kept talking to. It didn’t sound like his mom, you knew what his mom sounded like. It had to be a girl from his job. But every time you asked, he gave a different answer. 

When he was done with his call, he waved to you from the outside, signaling that he was ready to go. 

You grabbed a bag of Lays sour cream and onion chips, gummy worms, and went up to the register.

“Will that be all?”

“One pack of Marlboros and one pack of Newports too, please.” You pointed behind the cashier. 

Hollis was waiting for you by the car when you walked back outside. “They didn’t have any Trolli gummy worms, so I just got you these knock off ones.” You held up the bag.

“That’s okay, I like those too. C’mon.” 

You both got in the car, and drove away from the gas station. The way to the motel was pretty dark at this time of night. Nothing but flat land on both sides of the road, and the only light coming from the car’s headlights.

It was quiet for the first few minutes. Nothing but the sound of the car and Hollis’ music on the stereo.

“Hollis?”

“Yeah?”

“Who…who were you talking to? At the gas station?” You asked.

He clicked his tongue. “Eh, it was nobody. Work related.”

“You always say that. Aren’t we supposed to tell each other everything?”

“Look. It’s nothing. Why are you worried about that, and not the cool motel I’m about to take you to?” He tried to change the subject. “Reviews said it’s one of the nicest motels out there. No bedbugs, a hot tub, complimentary free drinks.”

You sighed. You weren’t gonna get an answer out of him. At least right now. And you were still excited to go. The whole thing just bothered you, it has for weeks.

You saw him look at you in the corner of your eye. “We’re almost there. Hang tight, I know you’re hungry.”

You turned up the volume on the stereo, staring out of the window and trying to move on from the conversation for now.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥

The motel’s sign was aggressively neon pink. 

Both of your faces were covered in the light of it getting out of the car. It read ‘Motel of Love.’ 

Hollis and you walked into the lobby. It was already really nice, way nicer than any of the other motels you’ve been to. 

“Hi, I have a room booked.” He walked up to the receptionist.

“What’s the name?” The receptionist was clearly tired. She was older, with a cigarette in the corner of her mouth, and a manicure nearly chipped off.

“Hollis.”

“Room number 130. Here’s your key, on the back of it is the Wi-Fi password and a QR code to the room service menu. We had to switch from physical menus to virtual since more than a few guests found it amusing to put their body fluids on them.”

“Oh.” Hollis laughed awkwardly, grabbing the key. “Let’s go.” He nodded his head towards you.

You walked with him to the room. “It’s really nice here, Hollis.”

“I’m glad you like it.” He smiled. “I was worried for a second there that you didn’t.”

“No, it’s great. Really fancy lookin’.”

“Just wait until you see the room.”

110…120…130. Hollis almost missed it. He stopped in front of the door, and got the key out.

“Ladies first.” He put his hand out in the doorway. 

“Thank you.” You giggled. You looked around the room. There was one bed. The sheets were red, with white pillows. The bathroom was average, but pretty nice for a motel.

Hollis put his jacket on the back of the door. “I don’t know about you, but I really want to shower.”

“Oh, I’ll let you go first.” 

“Alright, thanks. I was gonna let you go first if you wanted to but…well, yeah. Thank you!” 

You snickered at his awkward speech. He was so endearing and adorable all the time. 

That’s why you felt a bit bad for what you were about to do when he was in the shower. Your eyes glanced at his phone near his suitcase. 

Since he wasn’t telling you, you were going to figure it out yourself. It was going to bother you for the whole night if you didn’t.

When you were certain he was in the shower, you grabbed the phone and unlocked it. You both had the password to each other’s phones, because you were that close. 

Immediately, you clicked on the Phone app and went to the recent calls. And lo and behold, a female name was within the recent ones. Mandy. With ‘Work’ beside it.

And it wasn’t just one call, it was multiple. You remember some of these. All of the different answers, and it was the same girl every time. Your heart dropped. You were scared to open their text messages. You wanted to see what she looked like first.

You got out of the Phone app and went to his instagram. You clicked on his following and searched for a Mandy. You clicked on the only account that showed up. It was a girl with blonde hair, piercings, and eyeliner.

Each scroll through her profile sent sparks of anger up your spine. He was talking to this girl behind your back. And lying about it.

His face dropped coming out of the bathroom when he saw you standing up with his phone in your hand. 

“(Y/n)—”

“Who is Mandy?” You spat immediately.

“Why are you going through my phone?”

“Answer me first. Why are you talking to a whole other girl behind my back?”

Hollis sighed and face-palmed. “It’s just a friend from work. I didn’t think it was that important.”

“Hollis, we tell each other everything. You’ve been lying about it. You said you were on the phone with so many different people, but it has always been this girl.”

Hollis wiped himself off with his towel and dropped it in front of you. He kneeled down to grab clean clothes from his suitcase. “I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d freak out and assume the worst.”

“How can I not freak out with how suspicious you’re moving about it?! I’m just confused why you didn’t tell me. I feel like you’re hiding a lot of stuff from me, and I just don’t want that. I don’t want to be with a man I don’t know.”

He scoffed. “I feel the same way.” 

“What?” 

He stood up, now fully in his pajamas. “You know how insane it is to find out that your girlfriend was hanging out with multiple men behind your back via an instagram post?” 

Your face contorted in confusion, until you realized he meant the coworker from your new job’s party that you went to. “Hollis, that was nothing. It was for work.”

His eyebrows raised in disbelief. “You couldn’t have given me a heads up? You don’t think I'm that dumb, I can’t see the look in those men’s eyes when they talk to you? And you not only go to a party with them, but not tell me about it?”

“I…I just didn’t think it was that important. And come the fuck on, that is nothing compared to literally talking to someone one on one on multiple occasions. And lying about it!” You shouted, flailing your arms around in disbelief.

Hollis laughed coldly, not replying. 

“You’re deflecting.” You teared up. You always did whenever you argued. “I just want you to tell me things…when I ask. Like you always used to. It seems like ever since we’ve gotten these new jobs, you haven’t been honest with me.”

“You know how I feel about you hanging out with other dudes like that. It’s already annoying that I couldn’t get the same job as you, now I have to hear the stories about how much the men there flirt with you from your coworkers Instagram’s on my recommended.” Hollis leaned on the wall. “Why couldn’t you tell me about that?”

“I just…” Your voice croaked. “Thought it would be better if you didn’t know about it.”

Hollis walked over, sitting next to you. “Guess we both feel the same.”

You felt bad. What was supposed to be a romantic night together, turned into this. Your mouth hung open, trying to find the right words to say, but nothing came out.

“Look. I’m gonna go smoke. The bathroom’s free.” He quickly put his jacket on, and left the room. 

Tears fell from your face. The only sound in the room was your sniffles from you sobbing. After a while, you got up from the bed and went to bathe.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥

When you came out of the bathroom, he still wasn’t back. In another timeline, you would be telling him how nice the bathtub was and how nice the soap smelt.

Instead, you got dressed in your pajamas and sat on the bed alone. You turned the TV on to break the silence.

You scanned the QR code on the wall with the room service menu. You forgot about the free complimentary drinks, you contemplated taking them up on that offer.

When Hollis got back, you would apologize. You were the one to bring the whole thing up, and it spiraled into what it was. It seemed like both of you just wanted the other to be more honest and open. 

After an hour of watching Family Guy reruns and looking at the room service menu still, you heard the door being unlocked. 

It was Hollis. The silence was deafening, even with the TV on. He put his jacket on the door. 

“I’m sorry.” You immediately blurted out. He looked at you, not saying a word yet. “I’m sorry for going through your phone, and I’m sorry for not telling you about the guys at work, I-I—” 

He walked over and sat next to you on the bed. He grabbed your face and smushed your lips together. Your eyes were wide open. His mouth tasted like cigarettes. But you reciprocated it anyway.

It was almost scary. He was silent, but moving so quickly. He climbed on the bed and towered over you, kissing you roughly. You couldn’t tell if he was still mad or not. 

His hand groped your breast through your shirt. You felt his crotch. He was rock hard already. He quickly pulled his shorts and boxers down and got his cock out.

You jerked him off with his tongue still in your mouth. His hands pulled your pajama bottoms down with your panties too. He pulled off of the kiss and wasted no time. He grabbed his dick, spread your legs and thrusted inside.

You moaned loudly at how quickly he stretched you. He started going at a fast pace as well.

He panted above you, thrusting away. You laid there and took all of it. Sex was a great stress reliever, it would probably do some good to fuck it out. You had no problem with testing that theory, it had been a few days since you both got the chance to do this.

He leaned in to give you a kiss on the cheek, that was actually meant for your lips. You giggled at that and grabbed his face, connecting your lips again.

The sex was so desperate. He was going so fast, just wanting to cum. The bed squeaked loudly. It seemed like it had been used in this way many times. You trailed your fingers down and rubbed yourself. The way he was acting right now was turning you on so much. It was like a whole different side of him. All of that anger was being put into how hard he was fucking you.

His moans got whinier and messier. He was about to cum, you could tell.

“You gonna cum?” You whispered, looking into his eyes.

“Yeah.” He answered breathlessly. He pulled out at the right time, and jerked himself off on your belly. “Fuck.” He groaned while rubbing himself. You watched all of his cum land on your stomach. 

He noticed you didn’t cum yet. He quickly got in between your legs and put his mouth on your pussy. He made his tongue flat and licked up and down. Your hands played with his dirty blonde hair as he licked you to completion. Your face was burning looking at him between your legs. 

He looked so focused on making you cum. His tongue swirled around your clit and darted in and out below. You moaned loud when he moved his tongue really fast. 

Your head leaned back and your back arched. When he noticed you were about to cum, he went even faster, his eyes watching you the entire time. You gripped the sheets with your right hand as it wracked through your whole body.

You both laid on the bed afterwards, covered in sweat and both trying to catch your breath. The quickie did make you feel a lot better.

“I’m sorry too.” Hollis broke the silence. “I can’t stay mad at you.” He chuckled into a face palm. “I’m supposed to, but I can’t.”

You turned over to look at him.

“Listen. I’m sorry for lying to you. I should’ve just told you in the first place. But I swear to God (y/n), it is nothing like that. At all. She’s…”

You listened intently, resting your hand on your cheek on the pillow.

“She’s my friend. I mean it. And I’ve been meaning to introduce you to her and all the other friends I’ve made, but our schedules keep clashing.” He sighed, and turned over to look in your eyes. “I wish you were there too. But if you want me to stop talking to her, I will.”

“Can we just…promise to keep telling each other everything? No more secrets?” That was really the main issue.

“Yeah.” Hollis pulled you into a hug. “No more secrets.” 

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥

For the rest of the night, things finally went as planned. You and Hollis ordered from the room service menu. The free drinks certainly tasted free. You clinked both of your drinks together as a toast on the bed. 

“Blagh.” You stuck your tongue out after a sip. “Why does, like, every alcoholic drink kind of taste like shit?”

“I don’t think people drink it for the taste.” He chuckled. “This does suck, though. Probably why it was free.” 

After having a drink, you followed Hollis to where the hot tub was. The hotel didn’t seem like it had a lot of residents tonight. Maybe they were all in their rooms. 

The tub itself was outside by the pool. The lights inside of it were pink. You took your robe off. You both brought your swimsuits just to do this. You winced a bit, sticking a leg in. “It’s hot.”

“Kinda in the name, babe.” He smiled, taking his robe off too. Something about seeing him shirtless outside like this made you blush. You always forgot how built he was. He was skinny, but still had a bit of muscle. He got in the tub beside you and sighed happily, putting his arm around you. “Isn’t this nice?”

“Yeah.” You snuggled into him in the water. “Isn’t this motel a little eerie though? It feels like we’re the only ones here.”

“Yeah, I like it. Don’t you? Since when are you freaked out by scary places?” He smirked. “Man, we gotta start going out exploring again. We’re gettin’ rusty.”

“It’s our dang jobs taking up all the time. It is cool though. We’re all alone.” You said in a suggestive tone, nuzzled your face in his neck.

He let out a small laugh and leaned his head down, kissing you. “Don’t get any funny ideas, though. I feel like that lady at the front desk would kill us.”

“She looked dead inside.” You chortled. “What if she was, and we feel like we’re alone because all of the residents are ghosts?”

Hollis laughed. “That would be cool. Scary, but cool.”

Back at the hotel room, you changed back into your pajamas and laid in bed with Hollis once again. You were having so much fun, you both almost forgot about the argument from before.

Hollis promised to introduce you to his friends from work as soon as he could when you both got back home. You promised to not go to a party like that without telling him. Overall, you both promised to stop hiding things from each other entirely.

You dozed off in his arms, being lulled to sleep by his heartbeat right below you. The night at the motel went so quick, you thought about asking him to stay for longer in the morning.

ᯓᰔ

𓆰♱𓆪 ⛪︎

A good while had passed since you last watched him in deep sleep. Still naked, same as you, lying on his stomach the way he always did when you were out of his reach — when he couldn't hold you. God, he looked so peaceful. No sign of anger, happiness, jealousy, or lust. You liked to think that this was his real self, undressed from his ego and his antics. So different from what the two of you had been doing for the past few hours. What started with a simple, exhausted comment from you turned into mockery from him, which grew into a fight, and in no time you were screaming at him from the parking lot all the way to the motel room. The receptionist had even come to check if everything was alright. But just after he said those mean words to you, he was kissing you, pulling you into his arms — kissing, touching, gripping you as if you belonged to him. That was all you needed to ignore the aching pain of humiliation that he so easily planted in you.

As the first rays of sunlight squeezed through the gaps in the curtain, you glanced outside. The car keys were on the nightstand. The money was in his wallet. You could just take it and leave. You could go back to your parents' house and live whatever life they imposed on you. You could. You could. But then you felt his arms reaching for you, dragging you closer. You heard his sleepy voice humming as he squeezed you tight, and your heart filled with something you couldn't name.

"Get some sleep, honey," he murmured in a groggy voice.

You hid your face in his collar, smelling his perfume, feeling the warmth of his skin against yours. So familiar now that you could barely remember a time when your days and nights were not filled by his disturbing presence.

Back when life had gone on so slowly you barely noticed it passing. That was what happened when you were stuck in an endless spiral of apathy. Small town in the middle of nowhere, same faces every day, same places to go, no perspective of future — that was pretty much what summed up your whole life. And it had been that way for as long as you could remember.

From eight to five, that was where you spent most of your days: reading, scrolling through your phone, petting Buddy, occasionally serving a customer — usually a truck driver passing by or an old farmer coming from the fields into the city — or playing with the stray dog that always showed up at your lunch break to share your meal. You just didn't have it in you to deny a chicken wing or half your beef to those gleaming puppy eyes. You called him "Buddy" because that was what you had called him the first time he appeared.

That was what you were used to. That is, until a random Thursday, when you were just squatting, petting Buddy, and a car pulled up outside. Not that you were really familiar with car models and brands, but that didn't look like the usual type of vehicle that showed up around here. When the driver stepped out, it only made you more certain he wasn't a local — not even from the big city nearby, maybe from outside the state. You spent too long staring at the long-haired guy walking your way, so that when you stood up, he was already stepping inside the store. He didn't even look at you. You rushed inside, back to your register. He wandered around, seemed aimless, his eyes wavering over the shelves, and that made you a bit nervous. A whole year you had worked here and you had never been robbed. It wouldn't be some city boy that would be your first, you hoped.

Thankfully, he finally found what he was looking for — a six-pack. He dropped it on the counter.

"Anything else?" you asked. Only then did you get a closer look at the guy. His mid-length honey-toned waves had already caught your attention at first, but his whole face was something else. Sharp features, plump lips, hazel eyes under a fair amount of eyelashes that would leave any woman jealous. And Lord, was he tall — maybe too tall. You bit your inner cheek. Clearly he wasn't from around here. You had never seen a man so beautiful.

"A Marlboro Red," he said. He wasn't looking at you, but when he glanced down, you felt your whole face burn. Thankfully, you had to turn to grab the cigarette pack and could escape his casual gaze.

It was simply that. He paid, thanked you before you could, and just left. And you really thought he would never show up again — just an outsider passing by, maybe the most exciting thing that had happened this whole time you had been working there, a good casual break from the routine.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

Days went by in that boredom's deep rhythm of Collinsville. By Sunday, you were stepping outside church with your mom when you saw that same car parked across the street. You immediately looked around, searching for its owner, but there was no sign of him. What were the odds that someone else had that exact same car around here?

"You okay, honey?" your mom caught your attention. "Good Lord, y/n, look at your dress."

She fixed the collar of your dress as you barely paid attention to her. Still too spaced out of your surroundings to care about your mom gossiping about the new fiancé of her friend's son.

"If you were a bit smarter, it could have been you. I'm sure Denise would be way happier with that, I tell you," she said on the drive home. She was still talking about it.

"Mom, the man's almost forty and still lives with his mom," you said, glancing out the window.

"That's 'cause he's her only son! He has a fine job at the Town Hall," she kept on. Her voice was already buzzing in your ear. "He could get you out of that convenience store."

You had to fight the urge to groan in annoyance. "I'm fine with my job. Unless you're telling me to be a homewrecker or something. Didn't we just get out of church, Miss Lainey?"

"Good Lord, y/n, what are you saying? I was just commenting on it." She seemed embarrassed enough, and you had to smile at that.

At least she left you alone with all that talk, drifting the topic to what she would be making for dinner.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

Sunday was bad enough already — having to go to church with your mom and listen to the preacher for a whole hour, then having to greet her friends and the sons and daughters of those said friends, and wear those long thick dresses that made you look like a Southern tragic stereotype. But the fact that the next day meant the start of a whole other week was even more discouraging.

The only thing that kept you going was a single ambition you had: getting out of this town, maybe moving to Tulsa — the nearest big city. A small goal, but anything that meant leaving this town was worthy — leaving the routine, your parents, and everything that had been following you miserably here. You had been saving money without telling anyone, and when you had enough, the plan was simply to vanish.

That car you had seen parked outside the church on Sunday wasn't a coincidence. He showed up the next day, and for days afterward — always buying a pack of Marlboro Red and something else: food or beer, sometimes both. The only words you exchanged were casualities like "Anything else?", "Thank you", "That's all."

By the end of the week, you were just about to finish your shift when you heard the bell above the door ring. It was him — his fifth time there. You counted. He had come every day. As usual, he went straight for the freezer. He placed the six-pack onto the counter and two packets of frozen lasagna.

"Marlboro Red?" you said before he could.

He smirked. "That's right."

You held back your smile before turning to grab his cigarettes.

He was just turning to leave after paying when he stopped. "Um, I almost forgot." He looked at you again. "Do you know any place around where I could get my car checked?"

"Oh," you said, caught off guard. "Yeah, I mean, there's pretty much only one mechanic in town," you chuckled.

"So..." He kept looking. "Do you have his number? Or address?"

"Yeah, I mean, I don't actually have it, 'cause I don't have a car, so I don't..." You messed up your words, a bit nervous.

"That's alright. I'll look around. Thanks, though..." He was turning again.

"But my dad has it!" you rushed to say, and he stopped. "I could ask him and tell you, if you... show up here again."

Only then did you realize how stupid your solution was. Still, he curved his lips into a smile, getting you flustered but a bit puzzled, too.

"Don't you have a number yourself?" He placed both hands on the counter, that smile still hanging from his lips in such a way that heat crawled from the back of your neck to your whole face. "That way you can ask your father and send it to me. What do you think?"

"Yeah... sure. That's easier, right?" you asked, and he nodded.

He reached for his phone in his back pocket and handed it to you, unlocked. "Put your number."

You grabbed the phone from his hand — a slight brush of fingers that left you electrified. You felt like a teenager. You typed in your number and saved it as "gas station cashier." Once he saw it, he chuckled.

"Don't I get a name?"

"Uh, yeah, but I mean, you don't know my name. How would you know it was me?" You frowned, and he laughed.

"Well, you could just tell me."

Dumb. Embarrassingly making a fool of yourself. "Right..." you laughed. "I'm y/n."

Another smile from him. "That's a beautiful name, y/n. Mine is Hollis."

It was simply that. A dumb interaction about a mechanic's number and your name that had you later giggling at yourself after he left.

As soon as you got home, you asked your father for the mechanic's number — making up some excuse about it being for your boss. It was easier to lie; to avoid questions. Your parents could be very invasive. You thought he would take longer to text you, but you were just getting out of the shower when you saw your phone light up.

Unknown number: cashier girl?

You: that'd be me. Hollis?

Unknown number: that's right. what u up to?

You: nothing much. you?

Hollis: beer, lasagna and football

You: you watch football?

Hollis: don't i look like the sports kind?

You: not really

Hollis: lol. well, you don't look like the kind to stay home on a Friday

You: what does that mean?

Hollis: no boyfriend?

Was he flirting with you?

You felt your belly freeze, a shiver running down your spine. A strange feeling you hadn't felt since you were in high school and met your first — and only — boyfriend. That was before your parents found out and threatened the boy's entire generation to stay away from you. The boy never spoke to you again.

You: not really

Hollis: no way. maybe a complicated ex?

You rolled your eyes at that but couldn't help the smile that hung from your lips. It wasn't that you were naive or inexperienced, but it had been so long since you had looked at a boy that it felt foreign even to be silly through texts.

You: sorta

Hollis: knew it. will he kill me if i keep talking to you? is he a redneck with a shotgun?

You: haha funny. you're safe, don't worry

Hollis: that mean i should keep talking to you?

You: if you want to

Hollis: ouch. ur a hard one

You: how's the game?

Hollis: we're losing :(

You: cowboys?

Hollis: fuck no. the bears

You: that's why you're losing then :p pick a better team

He was actually so entertaining that you almost forgot why you were talking to him in the first place. With time, you were giggling at your phone without even realizing it.

You: aren't you forgetting something?

Hollis: am i?

You: the number

Hollis: right. the number. you got me distracted

You: 🙄 [number]

Hollis: thanks. ur a life saver

You: it's just a number

Hollis: im being nice. be nice too

You: im nice. you're just silly

Hollis: silly??? we'll see about that

You: no we won't :p now you got your number. imma get some sleep. bye hollis

Hollis: do i get a good night?

You: good night silly goose

You didn't know where that came from but as soon as you sent it you just felt terribly stupid about it. A few instants and he replied.

Hollis: good night pretty girl

Reading that made your face instantly burn. What was that? You almost threw your phone away. Thankfully you were in your room, by yourself, because you couldn't fight the dumb smile playing on your lips, nor could you fight your heart stubbornly thumping in your chest.

For quite a while you tossed in bed, trying to calm down enough to finally get some sleep. It took a while, but when sleep finally won you over, you drifted off to the image of him: his tall frame, slightly leaning across the counter, that smirk he had given you when you stumbled over your words in front of him.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

Over the next couple of days, just the memory of that conversation left you flustered. You felt dumb and foolish, like you had embarrassed yourself. When you read through the texts again, you could only think: why were you being so weird? You were almost twenty. You shouldn't have gotten that nervous over something so trivial. You felt a mix of relief and anxiety that he hadn't texted you for the weekend.

But when Sunday arrived, you actually wished he had been texting you the whole time rather than seeing him while you were getting out of church. He was across the street — tank top, his messy long hair flying in the wind, just stepping out of his car — and you nearly hid behind your mom when he turned toward you. Maybe he wouldn't see you — you hoped — but your doubt vanished once you caught him staring right at you. His gaze was so intense, unwavering, and it burned through you enough to leave you feeling unsettled by it. No smile, no nod, nothing. He just kept looking at you. You pressed your lips together to avoid expressing anything and fixed your hair, brushing it behind your ear.

"...y/n? We're talking to you." Your mother's voice pulled you back.

"Oh, hi." You turned your back to him. It was some of your mom's friends — and their son. You smiled.

You played it cool, polite, gentle as always, but you felt like you were burning, from head to toe. Too exposed. Out of all places, you didn't want him to see you like that.

Monday arrived, and with it your whole system went on full alert. For the entirety of your shift, you felt like he might show up at any moment and make your whole face pop off your neck out of sheer embarrassment. But he didn't show up. Not on Monday, not on Tuesday, not on Wednesday. By Thursday, you weren't on edge anymore. Maybe that was it. He had checked his car and left town. He didn't seem to be around, and even though you never asked, he didn't seem like the type to stay. There was nothing good in this town worth staying for.

During the last few hours of your shift, you were fixing a shelf — or at least trying to. Your boss had asked you to do it since Monday, and only now did you feel calm enough to focus on that damn uneven shelf. He said it was just a loose screw, and you tried to tighten all of them, but it was still bending.

But that was exactly what you shouldn't have done. The moment you let your guard down was the perfect time to be surprised.

"What's going on here?" you heard a playful voice, and your heart missed a beat.

You nearly stumbled off the step stool you were on, grabbing the shelf — the first thing within reach — to stay upright. The old thing bent, and you would have fallen to the ground if rushed steps hadn't come up to you and held you by the waist. If your heart had missed a beat a second ago, it was pounding all of them now.

"Hey, careful," he said, still holding you. His fingers, even through the fabric of your shirt, felt like they were burning.

"Careful? You just—" You stepped down from the stool and escaped his grip, putting a few feet of safe distance between you. "Why did you... I almost... Fuc— I'm sorry."

You rushed to apologize, even though you shouldn't have. It was out of habit. Your parents didn't like curse words. A simple fuck or shit was enough to get on their nerves.

"It's alright," he smiled. He seemed confused by your reaction. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"No, it's okay." You glanced away. Your whole body felt alert and feverish. "I was just distracted."

"What were you doing up there?" He looked at the shelf, then back at you.

"Fixing the shelf. It's uneven and loose." You reached for it, though you could barely poke at that height to show that it was moving.

"Um..." He looked closer. He stepped away, grabbed the shelf, and examined some spots. You just kept watching. "It's literally loose. It's missing a ton of screws."

"What? No, I just fastened them. All of them." You stepped closer and tiptoed to see what he was looking at.

"See? It's missing." He pointed. "Here, and here... and there."

He pointed them all out to you.

"He said it only needed fastening," you said, more to yourself than to him.

"Well, it does." He looked down at you. Only then did you notice how close you were. You stepped back. "Do you have any spare screws?"

"Back there, I—" You started to step away, then stopped. What were you doing? Leave the store with a stranger and go to the back room? "I'll do it later. Are you going to buy something?"

"I will. But I can help you."

"You don't have to. I can... put it myself."

"Put it?" He chuckled at your choice of words. "Let me help. Go get the screws. I'll stay right here."

You bit your inner cheek for a split second, but you ended up giving in. He actually helped you, with much more skill than you probably would have had. You felt like a perv as you watched — maybe with too much attention — as he furrowed his brows in concentration, arms flexing while he twisted the screwdriver. You had to actually look away before you started panting.

"All done," he said, looking at you after finishing the last one.

"Thank you," you smiled, a bit restrained. Shy.

"It's nothing." He smiled, too. He kept looking, and you kept looking, for at least a full minute. "Well..."

"Um, yeah, I'll — you can pick your things."

You turned before he could say anything else and walked in rushed steps back to the register.

A few minutes later, he was standing in front of you. No beer this time, but two bottles of what you thought was whiskey. You raised your eyebrows but said nothing, just turned and grabbed his Marlboro Red. When you looked back, he was grinning. There was something devilish about that grin that made you almost want to pray for your sins.

"What are you doing after this?" he asked while paying.

"Home," you said, looking at the cash desk with much more attention just not to look at him. 

"Can I take you somewhere?"

A cold shiver ran through your whole body. You felt too numb to speak, too numb to even look at him. Maybe you panicked for too long, because you heard him say:

"Got it."

He grabbed the bottles and the cigarettes and stepped back.

Before he could turn away, you said, "Where?"

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

"So my car broke down and I kind of got stuck here."

Both of you were leaning on the hood of his car, which he had parked right in front of an abandoned building parallel to the main street of the town. He had driven a few blocks before giving up on finding a good spot to stop, and now he was telling you what he was doing in town.

"But you're... in your car," you said, looking back at his vehicle.

He chuckled. "'Cause it just got ready, silly."

"Oh." You opened your mouth, and you caught a hint of a smile on his lips. It got you flustered.

"So you've been here your whole life?" He looked down at you.

"Born and raised. Unfortunately never left." You also looked at him.

He just nodded and stayed quiet for a while.

"People here are weird. You're actually the nicest person who's talked to me ever since I got to town."

"If I'm the nicest, I can't imagine the worst," you said, lightly laughing at your own words.

"Well, at least you gave me a smile."

He kept looking at you for too long again, and there was something about his gaze that just kept you stunned, like you couldn't help but stare right back at him.

"And you, you're not from around here, right?" You finally glanced away, your nerves creeping in.

"What gave me away?" A faint smile played on his lips.

"Your car. The way you dress. And talk. The way you look."

He laughed. "All that?"

You nodded, lured by his smile into smiling back at him. "Where are you from?"

"Guess."

"Mhmm." You looked away, thinking. "Tulsa?"

"No... a bit further." He chuckled. Playful.

"Arkansas?" You frowned, puzzled.

"Fuck no. Kind of offended now."

You rolled your eyes. "Where, then?"

"Illinois. Chicago."

"And what on earth are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing. You don't seem pretty fond of this place."

You knew he was looking at you, but you were looking everywhere around just not to meet his gaze.

"Um, I don't know," you shrugged, keeping your thoughts to yourself. "I'm working on something, but it's sort of a senseless plan still."

"What do you mean?" His attention was fully yours. Those eyes seemed to reflect the night as he stared at you.

"It's dumb." You gazed at the old fabric building in front of you, just to avoid looking at him.

"Come on, you can tell me." He bumped his shoulder into yours, and you smiled faintly. "What's better than a stranger to share senseless thoughts with?"

"I just wanna get out of here. Maybe go to Tulsa. I don't know. Save some money and just leave."

"Well, that's not dumb, but you could aim for some better place."

"Like what?"

"I don't know, but there's more to life than the state of Oklahoma. Like California. I'm heading there."

"Are you inviting me?" you asked, playful, but he kept staring at you with a straight face. Then he furrowed his brows, as if he were figuring something out.

"If you want a lift, you wouldn't be such bad company." He shrugged, casual.

Your eyes widened a bit, but something weird rested on your chest at his strange invitation. As insane as it sounded, couldn't you just leave? What else did you have to lose when you were already lacking everything?

"Do you drink?" he asked.

You thought about telling the truth — you didn't drink — but as he extended the bottle in your direction, your only thought was: screw it, and you grabbed the bottle. One thing was not saying you weren't used to drinking; another thing was pretending to be used to the taste of that brown liquor. Your whole face twisted as soon as the very first sip of that thing slid down your throat.

"Jesus!" you murmured and heard a small laugh come from him.

"Don't drink. Dress up for church on Sunday. You're making me feel bad for bringing you here."

As soon as he mentioned church, your whole face went warm. You widened your eyes a bit, and that got him smiling at you.

"You looked really pretty on Sunday, though," he said, taking the bottle from your hands.

"Shut up." You stared at your feet, your whole face burning.

"No, I mean it." A pause while he drank. "All dolled up and shit. Couldn't stop staring at you."

Only then did you glance up. Of course he was looking straight at you. Your whole body was tense, but some weird feeling was twisting your lower belly, unsettling your entire system. He tilted his head, his eyes studying you for so long. He dropped his gaze to your mouth for a brief second — enough to get you anticipating something.

"Sometimes you can just say thank you, you know?" His hand came up to your face, pulling a strand of hair from your cheek back behind your ear. It gave you goosebumps.

"Thank you," you said, almost a whisper.

"That's better." He leaned down, his hand sliding from your face to your neck, your shoulders, all the way down your arm until it finally rested on your waist. Each place his fingers touched left your skin burning underneath.

When his face was close enough, you felt the tip of his nose brush against yours, his warm breath on your lips — so near but not touching. You closed your eyes out of instinct, and the grip on your waist grew tighter.

When he kissed you, you felt like exploding. His lips were impossibly soft, and he was so gentle it felt like he was being cautious, like he could scare you off at any given minute. And you knew why. For a few seconds, you were stiff under his touch, but when you felt his thumb brushing your waist, slightly lifting your shirt in a soft caress, you gave in. Your hands found their way up to his chest, his shoulders, until you were completely entangled with him.

Soon he was in front of you, easily lifting you up so you were fully sitting on the hood of the car. His other hand came to your thighs, squeezing you in a way that made you sigh against his mouth. You could feel him smiling on your lips, his body getting even closer, fitting in between your legs. That was more than enough to get you panting, to get your panties drenched by the minute, by every brush of his tongue that made your body grow frail, needy.

His fingers dug up under your shirt until he cupped one of your breasts, and you instantly sighed — a bit startled but honestly too turned on to deny how good his touch felt, squeezing you just enough, not leaving enough space for you to make any sound that wouldn't end up stifled by his mouth above yours.

"So sensitive," he whispered against your mouth.

His mouth only left yours to trail down your neck, kissing your skin, nibbling and softly sucking at it. You found your way to hold his hair as he went on. For a while, you got lost in how good he felt to be aware of your surroundings. But once you came back to your senses, you stiffened again.

"Hollis..." you said, but it came out as a whimper.

He kept going, kissing your skin, then pressing his body over yours. You were so hot you could almost feel yourself burning.

"Hollis," you finally spoke louder, also reaching for his wrist to stop him.

"What's wrong?" He looked up.

"We're in the middle of the street," you said, your face burning with embarrassment.

"That a problem?" He asked. He didn't seem mad. Actually, humor threaded through his face, making you feel even more embarrassed.

He leaned closer again, his hands going back to your waist, pulling you near as he bent over to kiss you. You could feel a smile on his lips as he kissed you again, and you just bluntly allowed him to. You couldn't help it — you kissed him with much more eagerness, holding onto him as if it could release a bit of how horny you were. So much that you ended up whimpering against his mouth.

"You're making it hard for me," he said against your lips.

"I'm sorry..." you whispered back.

Something like guilt and fear crawled up your spine. Suddenly it didn't feel right. You didn't feel safe. You placed your hands on his chest and looked around — too exposed. Any neighbor could see. Words could spread. It could reach your parents.

"Not here," you said, almost a whisper.

"Not here?" He arched his brow.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

He could have been a murderer. A serial killer. You didn't even know this guy, and there you were, in his car in the middle of nowhere, driving to the motel where he was staying. Were you that dumb? Probably. But it was so tempting to do something, to escape your boring routine, that maybe it wouldn't have been that bad even if he had the worst intentions. And most of all, your panties had been soaking wet ever since that kiss.

The place he was staying at was a typical roadside motel. The parking lot was barely lit, dark curtains covering each window as if they had something to hide — or maybe you were just imagining things because you were dead nervous. His room was on the second floor. It was nothing fancy, but very wide and comfortable — a type of flat: one room, a small kitchen, a wide bed, and a big TV. It smelled clean as well — thankfully. He let you step inside first and followed right after. He closed the door, locked it, and walked past you.

You watched him from a few feet away, still stuck in place ever since you had stepped into that room. He went up to the counter and poured himself a glass of that stuff you had tried earlier.

"Guess you don't want any more of this, do you?" You shook your head in response. He smiled. He walked up to the bed and only then glanced back at you. "Are you scared?"

"No..." you answered, and a smile grew on his lips.

"Come here, then." He said, and it took you a few seconds, but you walked up to him. He sipped his drink as you approached — a long sip, enough to finish almost the whole glass — then set it aside. "It's okay."

His hand came up to your face, his fingers brushing a strand of your hair behind your ear. It made you shiver again.

"You're so fucking beautiful," he said, his voice low.

He stepped closer, and you stood still. Even if you had wanted to run away, you just felt stunned under his gaze. He moved to touch your waist but stopped.

"It's okay if I touch you?" he asked, and you just nodded. "Answer me."

"It's okay. You can touch me."

"Good girl." He grinned. That same devilish grin. "If I ask you something, I need you to answer me, alright?"

You nodded, numbed by his gaze. It took a few seconds for you to actually voice it, as he had asked. "Alright."

When you felt his hand on your waist, dragging you closer, you felt like crumbling under him. You had to fully lift your chin to look into his eyes, and when he leaned down, it made every single one of your muscles tense. He took his time, watching your face for a minute, then brushed his nose against yours. He kissed your cheek, your jaw, the corner of your lips, and you almost sighed at his grip tightening around your waist.

"Shhh," he whispered, and you felt his thumb caressing your waistline, slightly lifting the fabric of your shirt.

When his lips finally covered yours, you didn't instantly surrender to him. Your body felt too aware, too unsettled. But his fingers crept under your shirt, his lips fitted onto yours, and when his tongue slipped past the seam of your lips, you finally gave in. He tasted like alcohol, but he was so soft, so gentle, cautious even. In no time, you were responding to each of his movements, following his pace naturally.

He was almost intoxicating, in a way that left you easily magnetized by his every move. Everything he did, every touch, worked so smoothly through you. He undressed you from your shirt, and even though you felt uptight getting so exposed under his gaze, it was like he just knew how to get through to you.

His lips trailed down your body until he was kissing your chest. His mouth easily found its way to lick and suck at your nipple, and you no longer had it in you to stifle your loud sighs against him.

At the same time, so smoothly, he unzipped your jeans and slid them down your legs until you were standing in nothing but your panties in front of him. His eyes scanned your body, and you moved to cover yourself until his hands caught your wrists.

"Don't do that." You felt his touch on your hips. His coarse touch sent a shiver throughout your whole body, but it also made you press one leg against the other.

He kissed you again, ever so gently, so slowly, in a way that your mouths made wet sounds against one another — so lewd it had you almost whimpering. It seemed that growing so needy got you moving without shame. Your hands found the hem of his shirt and pulled it up. He smiled through the kiss and helped you get rid of his shirt — finally. Your fingers crawled across his skin, feeling him, lightly scratching with the tips of your nails.

Without breaking the kiss, his arm wrapped around your waist, and he easily walked you to the bed. He laid you down on the mattress. His body covered yours so easily as he fit himself between your legs.

It was pretty obvious where this was going, and although you had no experience whatsoever, you didn't feel like stopping. To be honest, you wanted more. And he gave you more. He went down your body in a trail of kisses — from your lips to your neck, your chest, your stomach, your lower belly — until he had his face between your thighs. When he first touched your panties, you bit into your lip. He rubbed you lightly with his thumb in circular motions, but it was enough to make you sigh.

"You're so fucking wet," he said, a grin on his lips.

Even with your cheeks burning, you just couldn't look away. When he took your panties off and buried his head between your legs, it made you instantly gasp. The first brush of his tongue on that sensitive nub of nerves had you whimpering. His lips eventually sucking on you felt different from anything you had ever felt. Nights when you had pleased yourself with only your fingers couldn't even compare. Soon you were whimpering, grabbing the sheets, then desperately holding onto his hair, making a mess of him as much as he made of your sensitive cunt.

By the time you felt his fingers at your entrance, it made you arch your back. Two of his fingers alone were enough to stuff you full, but when he thrust them hard and fast inside you, it turned you into nothing but a mess of needy noises that escaped from your lips without restraint.

When that fuzzy feeling began to crawl up your body — tingling your lower belly and making your whole body shaky — you helplessly tried to close your legs, which only made him go harder on you. Your pussy made loud, wet noises every time his fingers slid into you.

"God!" you pleaded, laying back as he won you over, spasming and trembling beneath him.

You were worn out, panting and numb, when he came up to you again. His body still fit against yours. When he kissed you again, you tasted yourself all over his mouth, and it would have embarrassed you if it hadn't made you feel so hot.

You got a bit puzzled when he leaned back, sitting straight, but as you watched him get rid of his pants and grab his own cock, you understood. You looked — really looked. He was big, big enough for his own hand. You bit your lower lip, apprehensive, as he grabbed a condom and slid it over his length. When he looked up at you and caught you staring, it drew another one of those knowing smiles from him.

He came up to you again, his forearm resting on the mattress beside your head, his body easily fitting against yours — but this time you felt him grinding on you, his dick sliding through your folds, slightly rubbing your overly sensitive clit. As you held your breath in anticipation, you also reached for his face. He smiled at that — not that grin or smirk, but a sweet smile.

"Relax," he whispered, leaning closer to your mouth. "Breathe."

He gave you a sloppy kiss, then another, and another. It helped you actually relax as you felt his tip pressing your entrance. You were wet enough for him to easily slide inside you, but once he did, you felt like it was tearing you apart. He did it slowly, and even so, it was too much.

"Fuck, you're so tight," he groaned against your mouth.

You didn't know if he could tell, but you clenched around him and squeezed your eyes shut as he started moving inside you. It helped you get used to him, since he went so slow, but it also made you feel precisely every inch of him stretching you open. You didn't even try to hold back your crying moans. You just held him tight, wrapping your legs around him as much as your hands gripped onto his skin.

That strange pain remained, but as you felt him set a pace, it also turned into something oddly pleasing. You could feel and hear how his body reacted to yours. He would moan right against your mouth, and he touched your body with so much eagerness that it left you feeling needed.

At some point, he leaned back, sitting up as he kept fucking you. His eyes watching you with attention made you feel impossibly vulnerable, but you had no shame — not when his thumb came to your clit to rub you as he stroked your body repeatedly.

You were already sensitive enough, and in no time you were rolling your eyes again, gripping the sheets as he drove you to another orgasm. He was restless, so rough, but it left you shaking beneath him, almost begging for more if you could actually form a coherent sentence in that moment.

When he leaned over you again, he held you so tightly — a warm hug that you understood was due to his approaching edge. He moaned against your ear, his face hidden in your neck, as his hips began to move out of pace — faster. He finished, releasing his load into the condom inside you. He muttered something you couldn't understand, and for a while all he did was keep holding you. Both of you, out of breath, sweaty, holding onto each other for a minute long.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

"It was your first time, wasn't it?" he said after a long silence you had been sharing in bed. Your head rested on his chest, his hand caressing your back in invisible patterns he traced onto your skin.

"How did you know?" you said, raising your head to look at him.

He was exhaling the smoke from his cigarette and smirked at you. "Was it good?"

It took you a second to answer. His eyes and the smile on his face got you instantly flustered. "It was. Really good."

You felt his hand on top of your head, petting you. It did something to your chest, to your lower belly — butterflies all over. "Was it good for you?" you asked, a bit concerned.

"Yeah, you were fucking amazing," he said, playful, but it drew a smile from your lips.

After some time just lazily entangled and sharing a peaceful silence, you almost fell asleep in his arms. But an alarm went off in your head. You had work tomorrow, and you had parents who would probably kill you once you got home. You just couldn't hide your unsettled state, and Hollis quickly noticed. He said he would drive you to work tomorrow, but you just couldn't. If you took twenty-four hours to show up at home, your parents would most definitely kill you.

So at 2 AM, he was driving you home, still silent. Some old country song played low, and at that point you just couldn't even look at him — the only thing you said to him was the directions to your house. You heard him humming to the song, then a heavy sigh. When he parked in front of your house, you just wanted to get out of his car, but he didn't unlock it right away.

"You'll be fine?" he asked, and only then did you look at him.

"What do you mean? I'm fine," you tried smiling at him, but he tilted his head and stared at you a bit too deeply.

"Okay, then." He glanced at your house. The front porch was lit up, which meant your parents were awake. "I'll probably be out of town in the next couple of days, so if you need something until then, you can tell me."

"Oh..." you mumbled. Yeah. He would be leaving. "Thank you, Hollis."

You were about to turn and leave when his voice stopped you again.

"That thing I said — I mean it," he said. You froze.

"What?"

"About coming with me. If you need a ride, you can come with me."

You bit your lower lip, nerves rushing to the back of your neck. "I'll think about it."

"Until Monday," he said.

You just nodded and heard the door unlock. You did not look back. You got out as fast as you could and walked to the door with two things on your mind: what awful things your parents would scream at you for getting home this late, and the fact that the best night of your life might just be leaving for good.

As you thought, they were in the living room waiting for you and actually peeking through the window at the strange car that had just dropped you off. From then on, it was a full hour of obscenities shouted at you. Your father even threatened you physically, which — surprisingly — your mother stood up for you on that one. For people who didn't like to swear, you heard the words slut, bitch, whore come out of their mouths too smoothly — almost natural.

"Who was that?" Your father pointed outside.

"A friend! I just said it a million times!" You rolled your eyes.

"It was a man! Why are you in a man's car at 2 AM? Are you some kind of whore?" your mother added, as if your father's whole show hadn't been enough.

"Oh my God! Can't I have a life?"

"You can have a decent life!" your mother said, and you could see how enraged she was.

"Yeah, 'cause you two know so much about being decent, right?" You laughed without humor.

They went on a new entire rant about how disrespectful you were and how unmindful you were of all the sacrifices they had made for you. You were honestly too tired to stand up for yourself, so you just listened to the whole thing until you could get to your bedroom and get some rest.

Of course, the last thing you thought of was him, and the first thing in the morning was also him. Actually, through the whole day you thought of him — wondering if he would show up, if he would text you. By the end of that Friday, you were really just hoping you would see a glimpse of his car passing by. None of that. Maybe he was just gone.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

One of the few things you liked about church was listening to the choir. Usually you would ignore the preacher's sermon, tuning out his words and the Lord's words themselves, for you had already listened to those your entire life. But this time, for some reason, the preacher had been relentlessly talking about freedom, and for a split second you could have sworn he was speaking directly at you.

After quoting Matthew 25:41 — "Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels" — he went on, carrying a gentle tone through the church, steady, unhurried, like he had all the time in the world.

"There's a kind of restlessness that settles in a person... makes 'em think there's somethin' waitin' just beyond where they are."

You kept your eyes forward, fixed somewhere past the pulpit, though you couldn't have said where. Your fingers pressed tighter against each other in your lap, the faint tremble barely noticeable.

Outside, a car passed slowly down the street. And you wondered, briefly, if it was his.

"And sometimes it feels so real, so right, you start believin' it must be meant for you."

Your jaw tightened. You swallowed, shifting slightly on the wooden pew as it creaked beneath you. Meant for you. The words lingered longer than they should have.

You thought of his voice from the night before — low, certain. You can come with me.

"But not every open door is placed there by the Lord. And not every path that feels easy is meant to be followed."

Your breath caught, shallow. You blinked, forcing your gaze back to the front, though everything felt distant now, like you were watching from somewhere else.

Easy. It hadn't felt easy. But it had felt like relief.

"Some things... they only look like answers. Freedom ain't always what it looks like."

Your hands loosened for a moment, then tightened again, nails pressing into your skin this time. Freedom. The word echoed differently in your chest — warmer, louder, harder to ignore.

You imagined it again despite yourself — getting in that car, not looking back.

"You can't take back the time you wasted."

The church felt smaller somehow. The air heavier. You shifted again, crossing and uncrossing your ankles, unable to settle.

What would you actually be leaving behind?

"Well. Some things don't wait for you to come back."

Your eyes flickered toward the stained glass, light spilling through in muted colors. For a second, you thought about your mother. The kitchen table. The same streets you had walked your whole life.

Then his face again — closer this time. Realer.

Your chest tightened.

You didn't know which thought scared you more: staying... or going.

For a while, you just sat there even after everything wrapped up and people were heading outside. By the time you realized, your mom was nowhere in sight, probably outside talking to someone like she always did. Not wanting to keep her waiting, you made your way toward the doors and were about to step outside when you felt someone grab your arm. You had no time to say anything or even turn to see who it was, because the next second a hand covered your mouth and you were easily being dragged to the back of the church. Despair caught you as you saw yourself being headed to a room at the back of the altar. The door closed behind you, and only then were you released. You were just about to scream when you saw him.

"What is wrong with you?!" you shouted, but he said nothing. "What are you doing here?"

The next minute, he was pressing you against the door, hands gripping your waist, locking you to his body. And if you had been scared to death a minute ago, now you were panting under his lips. Your hands found their way to his shoulders, his nape, his hair. His were a bit more eager than yours. He cupped your breasts over the fabric of your dress, then squeezed — a faint noise escaped your lips.

"What are you doing?" you asked between kisses, your cheeks burning just as much as your body.

"I wasn't even gonna talk to you," he said against your mouth, his hand sliding down your body until it reached between your legs — under your dress. You instantly held his wrist with both hands, not to stop him but to ground yourself, as he began to rub you over your panties. You bit your lips to keep from moaning. "But you look so fucking good in this dress."

"You're a pervert." Your voice came out frail, his fingers circling over your clit taking any strength out of you.

"Yet you're the one getting wet." He smirked, and you just hid your head in the crook of his neck in a desperate attempt to stifle your moans and hide your flushed face from his watchful gaze.

He pulled your panties aside, and you finally felt him skin to skin — his long fingers parting your folds, sliding down to your entrance. When you felt him slip one digit inside, a loud sigh escaped your lips.

"Shhh," you heard. His spare arm wrapped around your waist, grounding you somehow.

You kept your head resting on his shoulder as he fucked you with his fingers, wet noises every time they buried deep inside you. When he brought his thumb to rub your nub at the same time, you quickly found yourself rolling your eyes back. Small noises eventually escaped as you couldn't hold them in the closer you got to your edge.

"Please," you begged, not sure of what. But you felt flustered just thinking about where you were.

He stopped out of nowhere, leaving you dazed and confused, but as you watched him unzip his pants and pull out his dick, you quickly understood. You bit your lips seeing his full length once more. He stroked his already hardened cock. Hollis grabbed under one of your thighs, lifting it up around his hip as he had to lower his height to fit between your legs. You lightly chuckled at the difficulty due to your height difference, but when you felt him sliding inside you, your smile vanished. You gasped and held him tight. You still weren't used to it, and as he began to move, it only made it harder. Even when he was slowly fucking you, you could feel him stretching your insides, and you had to bite his shoulder to stay quiet.

"God, you feel so good..."

God. You glanced over his shoulder, and straight ahead was a picture of Jesus. If you weren't already gut-wrenching with nerves over what you were doing — and where you were doing it — you had Jesus staring at you. But you had no time to spiral into guilt. As if you weighed nothing, he grabbed you by your other thigh as well, and soon you were off the ground, being fucked in his arms. You felt like a doll, and as he quickened his moves, gripping you so roughly, your mind went completely blank. All you did was hold onto him and fight the urge to cry out his name.

A hint of courage took over you, and you leaned back to look at his face. He was so stunning — face flushed, out of breath just like you — and you could see in his tense jaw that he, too, fought the urge to moan. You bit your lower lip, and he smiled — a faint smile under that heavy breath.

"Fucking beautiful," he whispered against your mouth before kissing you.

The kiss was sloppy. Your saliva mingled into a mess of wet noises that you couldn't tell whether came from your mouths or from your pussy being repeatedly hit by him. All you knew was that every time he buried himself deep inside you, your body felt closer to burning.

First, you felt your lower belly tingle. Then a fuzzy feeling struck down your spine, and your entire body was consumed by spasms. A full blackout took over your mind as you felt your eyes roll back and your legs shake. At the time, you didn't know if it was the painting on the wall or if you had literally seen Jesus in your head. Thankfully, you were already in his arms; otherwise, you would have had no strength to stay on your feet. Your insides clenched around him, and that made Hollis go even harder, making you almost jump in his arms, bouncing on his cock over and over again.

"Fuck," you heard before he stopped.

He carefully put you on the ground again and slid out of you. You felt instantly hollow — but not for long. He turned you over, face to the door. You felt your dress being lifted up and your hips being gripped.

"Stick that ass up for me," he whispered, and you immediately did your best to follow his command with your numbed mind.

Hollis buried himself inside you again, and somehow it felt like he went deeper — so much deeper that you felt your legs almost give out. You had nothing to grab except the hard wooden door, which you placed your hands on for support as he thrust into your body mercilessly. At least his hands still gripped you tight, keeping you steady as he fucked you. It ached, how much he squeezed, but in the midst of how good your body felt at that moment, even the pain felt astonishingly good.

Just like that night, at some point, he lost his composure. He went faster, out of pace. A raw noise escaped his lips, and when he slid out of you, it took you a while to realize he had just come. Only when he leaned over you and kissed your shoulder, hugging you by the waist, did you understand.

"You okay?" he asked, his voice airy and deep.

You hummed, nodding. Until you remembered what he had asked you that night. "I'm okay."

You struggled to fix your posture and turn to him. He was doing the same — zipping up his pants, fixing his hair. When you tried to pull your dress down, you felt on your fingertips something wet, thick, and slimy on the fabric of the white dress. You looked at it on your hand, then looked at him. You weren't sure what came over you, but you brought your fingers to your mouth and licked them clean. It tasted strange, but the look on his face as you did it made you feel dazed.

He kissed you again, ever so intensely, and just like that, you were wrapped in his arms once more.

"I want to go with you," you said before thinking. He pulled back from the kiss and stared at you.

"What? For real?"

You nodded. "For real." A smile curved your lips as you repeated his words.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

It all happened so fast — from brooding over your options to making your decision to actually voicing it. You had to sneak out of that little room, pretending you weren't still flushed by his presence. Your mom didn't seem to notice; she just asked where you had been, and you said you were doing your prayers for a bit longer. She didn't suspect you had been inside the church after all.

The next day, you went to work as you usually did, but this time, you had clothes in your bag, your savings, and only half an hour into your shift, Hollis was parking outside. You watched him step inside with a contained smile, and he met you with his usual gaze — not cold, not sweet, just plain.

"Ready?"

"Ready." You got out from behind the counter, still smiling at him.

It was reckless at best, just leaving the store open and vanishing. He was just turning to leave when he stopped, looked around, then looked down at you.

"Since you're leaving for good," he said, "we can get some things for the trip, don't you think?"

Now he was grinning, and your smile had gone. You bit your lip, unsure, as you watched him grab a few things — a full pack of his Marlboro Reds from behind the counter, then a couple of six-packs.

An idea flickered through your mind, one you deliberated for little to nothing before sense caught up with you.

"There's a lockbox back there," you said, pointing to the storage room. "Do you think you can break into it?"

Hollis looked at you, and his smile grew wider. That was the first time you did something like that together, but you had no clue it wouldn't be the last. You emptied the lockbox of money — only a few grants — but it thrilled you with a mist of feelings, ranging from guilt to full adrenaline.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀♱ ⠀

The initial deal was that he would only take you out of the state and drop you wherever you wanted, but that never happened. In between roadside motels and inns, something quietly grew in your chest. You remembered the first stop you had after leaving Collinsville: he had asked for a double-bed room. Each of you slept on separate beds at the end of the night; he didn't make any move on you. You wondered if he just wasn't interested or if he was just tired — both reasons left you upset.

"Hollis?" you called out to him in the middle of the night. You had tried to sleep but just couldn't. It was the farthest you had ever been from home in your whole life.

"Mhm?" His voice was heavy, tired, since he had been driving for the past several hours.

"Are you sleeping?" you asked.

"Not anymore."

"I'm sorry," you whispered, curling into yourself.

Silence stretched for a couple of minutes until you heard a creak from his bed, then the mattress dipping behind you.

"Get some sleep. We leave early tomorrow," you heard him say as his arms wrapped around you. You felt his chest against your back, so warm, like his fingers caressing your waistline.

After that, you never slept in separate beds. After that, every bed you shared ended up with both of you entangled, sighs and whimpers mixing with the sound of heavy breaths and pleadings.

It was thrilling at first — everything exciting, so many new things you learned with him, so many new things you saw with him. Things began to shift once you got to know more about Hollis. He was twenty-two years old, three years older than you. He said he used to work at his father's company back in Chicago but had dropped everything to go on this road trip. The reasons, he never actually explained to you. He said it was something he had always wanted to do; then he said he was tired of the life he lived. But his answers were always so vague. He barely spoke about his past life if it wasn't for some childhood memory or some eccentric story about his teenage years and stupid shit he used to pull with his friends. But whenever the topic was family or personal, he would wave it off. Maybe he was just this reckless, unpredictable self. You couldn't blame him — it actually took you some time to open up to him, too. He would ask you things, and you would only answer plainly. But with time, you wanted to tell him things. You wanted him to know you beyond the physical. And it made you feel so good that he actually seemed interested in your stories — about your family, your parents, half-thoughts, the few hobbies you took interest in.

He was so surprising in many ways, for the good and for the bad.

At a gas stop, you were getting out of the convenience store. You had bought some snacks and his cigarettes when you saw him pushing a guy outside. The guy was shorter than him but much stronger. You rushed closer, worried, and the guy was coming his way again when Hollis lifted his shirt to show the grip of a pistol. Not only the guy but you were surprised at that. The guy backed off, but you had your eyes wide, stunned and slightly scared.

"Get in the car," he said to you. But you took too long to move. "Get in the fucking car."

And so you did. Later that day, after he fucked you under the shower in the bathroom of the motel you were staying at for the night, both of you were in bed, his head on your lap, something on TV that you couldn't pay attention to.

"Since when do you have a gun?" you finally asked.

"Since ever," he answered simply.

"Since when do you threaten people with a gun?"

It took him a bit longer to answer now, and you heard a tired sigh. "I was just defending myself. The guy was being a jerk."

He lifted his head to look at you, and you met his gaze. You couldn't hide how uncomfortable you felt about that.

"You don't have to worry. It won't be fired. It's just for defense, since I was traveling by myself." He leaned closer, his face nearing yours. "Plus, now I have to take care of you."

His voice, his gaze, his touch on your waist — it was all so convincing that it got you dumbly smiling at him. Your worries were swept away by his mouth over yours, his demanding touch gripping you tighter, his body taking over yours.

The gun wasn't a problem anymore. As a matter of fact, later he taught you how to properly shoot, and you became familiar with his weapon, practicing with him whenever you found a place where you could shoot without drawing attention. Maybe he thought you were so comfortable with it that he must have felt comfortable as well to go further. Just after you left Oklahoma, in a very small town at the southern edge of Colorado, Hollis insisted you were running short on money. You argued that you had money in the bank and could get some at the next 24-hour ATM — for some reason, he didn't like using cards. He refused. When you stopped by a convenience store, a small place in that tiny town that probably had little more than two hundred people living there, you saw a family house behind it, kids' toys scattered around, and a very old man as the cashier — probably a family business. Once you finished filling up the tank and got back to the car, Hollis stepped out and told you to stay in the car — he actually ordered you to. A few minutes later, he was stepping out of the store in rushed steps. He got back to the car, set his bag on your lap, and sped out of the parking lot. You were confused at first until you saw the gun in his hand, resting over the steering wheel. Then you opened his bag, and it was full of money.

"What did you just do?" you asked, almost screaming.

"Got us some money," he answered, staring ahead at the road. He had a smile on his face.

"I have money!" you screamed, eyes wide, your face already flushed.

"We're in the middle of fucking nowhere. The next ATM is probably gonna be miles away. You wanna sleep in the car?" He glanced at you briefly; you could see he was getting annoyed.

"I'd rather sleep in the car than rob a family store at gunpoint! Are you out of your damn mind?"

"Are you out of your damn mind?" He looked again. Thankfully, the road was empty. "I'm taking care of us, and this is how you thank me?"

"This is taking care of us?"

"This is how I'm taking care of us. You don't like it? You're free to go."

You were in complete disbelief, staring at him in dead silence. You just had no words, so you glanced away, curling into your seat after tossing the bag into the back.

"Baby," he called after some time, his voice softer, and you felt his hand on your upper thigh.

You didn't answer. You just shifted in your seat and stared out the window until sleep won you over. Hollis drove for more hours than he usually did that night — maybe he was trying to get as far as possible from that small town. You doubted the police would do much about a robbery in such a tiny place, but just in case. When you finally arrived at an inn, he barely showered before crawling into bed and completely succumbing to sleep.

That was the first night you watched him sleep while pondering whether to leave. And it was the first time he won without saying a single word. There was no one who could make your heart feel so tight in your chest even while just sleeping — his locks of hair falling across his face, his peaceful state. You recalled how, after the fight, he had backed off, how he had moved with care around you, using soft words: Are you hungry? Are you tired? We're almost there, baby. Maybe he was just taking care of you, in his own way. Maybe by the time you reached California, things would change. For better or worse. You found your place by his side in bed and finally fell asleep to his scent and the thought of a new place.

You said goodnight to your parents. Little did they know, you were still awake, waiting by your window for the sound of a car to pull up to your house.

You were never the type to sneak out before. You never understood why your friends did it, there wasn’t any man worth getting in trouble with your strict parents for.

Until you met Hollis.

It was at a college party with your friends. When all of you were of legal age, you all decided to go crazy and cross a bunch of stuff off your bucket list. That list included going to a huge college party. Full of drinking, hooking up, and hot college boys.

Hollis wasn’t the typical college boy. He was, but not the type your friends were into. Your friends wanted to sleep with the frat guys. You were more into the nerdy looking type.

He’d come up to talk to you when your friends were off somewhere else, probably talking with the frat boys. You both immediately clicked, and long story short you ended up having your first time in the back of his car that night.

Fast forward to now, he was your boyfriend. He was about three years older. Already a bit through college. And about to pick you up to take you to his place tonight.

His car approached. He looked at you in the window from the car, waving for you to come down. You smiled all giddy and opened the window, climbing out of it and skipping to his car.

“Hi.” You said, getting in the passenger seat.

“Hi, babe. Ready to go?”

“Yeah.” You replied back.

He pulled out of the driveway and began heading to his house. His car always smelled like weed. It didn’t really bother you though, it was partly because of you. 

You crossed off another thing on your bucket list when you smoked weed for the first time in the same seat you were in now. You remember coughing loudly on the very first hit.

Hollis had his music playing on the car radio. Some hardcore band. It wasn’t really your type of thing, but it was interesting to listen to.

“You already eat?” He asked.

“No, I was too excited.” 

He chuckled lowly. “So cute.” His right hand came off the steering wheel to rest on your thigh. You were wearing short shorts, so you felt his big hand on your exposed skin. You put your hand on his. “You want pizza again?”

“Mhm.” 

₊˚⊹♡

Hollis lived in an apartment. It was pretty small, not too big because he lived alone. But it felt cozy. You liked it. You bragged to all of your friends how you were dating a guy with a car and his own place.

He fiddled with his keys, jamming them into the door and unlocking it and letting you in first.

You walked in and put your bag down on the couch.

He came up behind you and gave you a hug, putting his head on top of yours. “I missed you. It’s not right to ignore your boyfriend all week.”

“I wasn’t ignoring you. We literally called and texted.” You giggled. “I can’t sneak out all the time, it’ll look suspicious.”

“Still not telling your parents about me?”

You looked up at him. “They would lock me in my room forever.”

“I’d just have to come save you. Ain’t that a Disney movie or some shit? Cinderella?”

“Tangled.” You laughed. “With Rapunzel.”

He rolled his eyes. “Same shit.” 

₊˚⊹♡

He ordered the pizza, and it came surprisingly fast. You sat on his couch with him. His arm was around you, watching you eat.

“Are you not gonna have any?” You asked him with your mouth full.

“Eh, I prefer pizza when it’s a little colder. I also already ate before.” He rubbed your shoulder. “Finish up. I want to do something new with you today.”

Your ears perked up. “Really? What?”

“Just finish your pizza.” He grinned.

You raised an eyebrow at him and went back to eating. You figured it had something to do with sex. Usually when you snuck out like this he fucked you so good, you’d go back to your house limping. 

₊˚⊹♡

When you finished eating, you trailed behind him going to his bedroom. He sat down on his bed, and had you stand in front of him.

“Your outfit is very cute, but I kinda want it all off right now.” He ran his hands up and down your waist and thighs. 

You smirked and began doing a strip tease. Starting with your shirt, you pulled it off slowly. Your boobs fell out of it and his eyes immediately darted to look. Next was your short shorts and panties. You took your sweet time with your undies, teasing him by wrapping your thumbs on the sides but not quite dropping them just yet.

“Quit teasing.”

“Hehe, fine…” You dropped your panties, fully revealed yourself to him. 

He pulled your torso close, giving you a kiss on your stomach. “You’re so soft.” He muttered between pecks. “Can you lay down on the bed for me?”

You nodded and got on the bed. He got up and went to rummage through his drawer. “I wanna do something new today. You trust me?”

“Of course.” You had tried a lot of new things with him. Almost all of your firsts. 

He took out a shoebox from his drawer. He set it down on the bed and opened it. It was full of sex toys.

You blushed a bit when you saw them. He pulled out rope, hand cuffs, and a vibrator. He picked up the rope first and smiled at you. “Could you put your arms up?”

“Like this?” You put your hands over your head, by the headboard.

“Yes, good.” He leaned over you, tying your hands to the bed with the rope. He smiled down at you when he saw your innocent looking face. “There we go, nice and tight. Remember the safe word?”

“‘Orange.’ What are you gonna do to me?” You batted your eyelashes.

“Nothing bad.” He brought his slender fingers to your pussy.

You let out a little sound when he trailed his finger up and down the outside, lingering ever so slightly on your clit. You whimpered when he rubbed circles, getting you wet.

When he was satisfied with that, he grabbed the vibrator on the bed. It was a Hitachi magic wand, the one with the big end. 

By then, you already guessed what he was up to. He turned it on and put it directly on your pussy. 

It was so intense. He immediately had it on a high setting. You unconsciously moved away from the intense feeling, but he pushed you right back on it. 

“Mm, it’s really strong.” You whined, begging with your eyes for him to give you a break or turn it down.

He chuckled sadistically. “That’s not even the highest setting.” Click.

“Ah-ah—!” The setting above it was even more intense. You could feel your orgasm being forcefully pulled out of you, rather than coming naturally. Your legs shook.

He clicked his tongue. “These legs keep moving. I’ll have to tie them up too.” He took he vibrator off right when you were almost about to cum. You caught your breath on the bed while he got more rope from the shoebox.

You weren’t sure how you felt about not being able to move your legs. The safe word was there for whenever you needed it, but he seemed really into what he was doing to you right now. And really, you didn’t want to stop.

Hollis had a lot of kinks. You quickly found that out after weeks of being with him. You wanted to be good and satisfy them for him. And to be honest, you discovered you liked some of his kinks too. You couldn’t tell if it was just because it was with him or that you liked them in general.

It took a bit for him to figure out how he’d restrain your legs. Ultimately, you ended up with your ankles tied to the rope already around your hands. You were completely exposed to him, it made you blush hard.

“All done, sorry. Took me a while to figure that out.” He sat back and admired his work. Your naked body was completely on display for him. You couldn’t move your hands or your legs. “Beautiful.”

He picked up the vibrator again and went back to it. 

“Hollis, please.” You begged. It felt so good that it hurt. 

His eyes watched your every move as he wouldn’t let up. That familiar warm feeling in your tummy wracked through your body and made you scream. He kept the vibrator on through the whole orgasm, and still didn’t pull off after it was over.

“Ah, please. Give me…a break.”

“No, you can handle more. Can’t you?”

You looked up at him with puppy eyes. He had a faint smile on his face. His eyes were dark with lust. “Yes.”

“Good.” He shut the vibrator off. You sighed in relief, catching your breath still.

You yelped again when he turned it back on. 

He clicked his tongue. “Being very loud, (y/n)…I have neighbors, remember?” He took the vibrator off and rummaged through his shoebox again, pulling out a small ball gag. “Open up.”

You obeyed him and opened your mouth, letting him tie the gag on you. 

“Perfect.” He smiled at you, petting your head. It felt like such a sadistic smile.

All you could do now is make noise through the gag as he overstimulated you down there. You were completely at his mercy.

You were indulging him in his kink, but it turned you on immensely as well. Your toes curled when you came again, whining through the gag. 

Once again, he wasn’t stopping. You teared up just a bit from the overstimulation.

His hand cupped your cheek. You looked up at him with pleading eyes.

“So fucking cute.” He muttered under his breath. “One more, okay? I just want to see you fall apart more, let me see it.” He put it back on, still on the highest setting. His soft voice sent shivers up your spine.

He rubbed the vibrator in circles, keeping his eyes on your face the whole time. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as yet another orgasm approached. You sobbed into the gag and wetness splashed around the ball of the vibrator.

“Good, baby, you did so good.” He kissed the top of your head. He untied your legs and scooted up closer. 

He pulled his pants down, and his extremely hard cock was now right next to your face. “Look what that did to me. It’s your fault.” He smiled, holding the base of his dick and slapping it lightly on your cheek. 

You wanted to suck him off, but you still had the ball gag on and your hands tied. You made a sound through them to get his attention.

He realized what you were asking for. “Let’s get this off.” Saliva connected to the gag when he took it off. Your mouth immediately wrapped around his tip. You hummed around his cock happily. 

He patted your head while you tried to fit him all in your mouth. Your eyes closed and he pushed himself in further. You gagged just a bit when you felt him by the back of your throat.

He was so hard in your mouth. It didn’t take long for him to get close, but he pulled out before cumming.

He went to untie your hands. “I wanna use these now.” He picked up the hand cuffs. They were fuzzy and comfortable ones.

“Okay.” You mindlessly answered. You were down for anything right now, as long as it made you cum.

This time, he pinned your arms around your back and put the cuffs on. They were less tight than the rope, it felt better.

He put you on all fours on the bed, but with your hands on your back. He spread your ass, getting a good look at your holes. He grabbed his dick and angled it to your pussy.

You whined into the bed when he pushed his long, thick cock inside. 

“So fuckin’ tight.” He began to move.

You laid there and let him use your body. You panted into the pillow below you. His hand gripped the middle of the cuffs. 

You whimpered with each thrust. Your voice got louder when his hand trailed down to your butt. His thumb was near the outside of your asshole. It dipped in ever so slightly. You moaned when his thumb pushed in more, not completely inside, just to tease.

“Fuck me.” You begged. “Harder…”

“Harder?”

“Mhm. I love you.” 

“What was that?” Hollis wasn’t sure he heard correctly.

“I love you!” You exclaimed. 

“I love you too, baby.” 

You moved your hips to meet him half way with his thrusts. Words can’t describe how much you loved his dick. When you fucked him for the first time, it was painful. You remember wondering just why everyone hyped it up so much. But now it was the most pleasurable experience you’ve ever felt, and all you ever wanted was more.

“Hollis, I'm cumming. I’m cumming.” You sobbed into the pillow. “I’m gonna cum!” 

You squeezed around him while it wracked through you. Your knees buckled. 

He kept thrusting, wanting to cum too. He grunted and pushed himself deep inside on one final thrust, filling you up.

₊˚⊹♡

The night ended with you laying on his chest, sleepy and satisfied. You came so many times. He whispered sweet nothings full of praise. He always made sure to not skip the aftercare part every time you had sex.

“I did well?” You smiled, rubbing his chest with your finger. “I made you happy?”

“You did so well.” He rubbed your head. “Made me very happy, love. I’m so lucky. Did you like it?”

You nodded shyly. 

“That’s good. Because there are a lot more things I want to try with you…” He leaned down to give you a quick kiss. You felt his brunette hair tickle your cheek.

As much as you wanted to, you couldn’t sleep over at his place. He drove you back to your house after. You gave him a kiss goodbye in the car in the driveway.

“I’ll call you tomorrow. Okay?” He smiled, his hand under your chin. “I love you.”

You leaned in for yet another kiss. “I love you more.” You grabbed your bag and left the car, waving at him as you walked to your bedroom window.

He stayed in the driveway to make sure you got in safely. He couldn’t help but giggle to himself when he saw the slight limp in your walk, and the marks from the ropes he used on your hands and legs.

⟡ ݁₊ .