It's not ideal

TRUE HATERS, SINCE DAY 1 THEY HAVENT BEEN GIVING THEM A FUCKING INCH

20 years later. you're kermit. opening night at the muppet theater. you look up. you can't believe it. those two awful cunts from next door are here. neither of them died yet. they're going to be here, forever.

depressed at 11 was crazy i should have become a child prodigy

i just rescued a pill bug they’re gonna reward me with a million pill bucks i’m gonna be a fucking pillionaire

💵🫲}([[[[[)

I JUST MADE ONE PILLION DOLLARS

a couple weeks ago this guy posted in the chicago pagan facebook group saying that he’s a djinn and that there’s a portal between here and egypt and only he and one other person had the power to close it and there was going to be a massive sandstorm… like dude, close the fucking portal, why are you even telling us this

im nonbinary in a way that doesnt really matter

Step back everyone. This post requires the delicate touch of an annoying gimmick blog

just ate an orange… no scurvy for me thank you… #NoScurvy

Peeing

Again with this

Knock it off

Huh, must've been the wind.

Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable

Being an adult will have you unironically sad about a parasite outbreak in fresh vegetables.