2u3 translations

ダーリン　 全部あなたにあげる お気持ちはたんと愛で頂戴

Darling I'll give you everything Please give me feelings full of love

ダーリン　 いつか認めておくれ その日が来るのを待っているわ

Darling Acknowledge me someday I'm waiting for that day to come

ひとりじゃ意味がない 言葉は生まれない わかってるの わかってるのに ずっと空知らず

There’s no point if I'm alone I can’t make up the words I know I know but I've always played ignorant

ふたりじゃ居られない 心は触れない わかってるの わかってるのに ずっと恥知らず

We can’t be together Our hearts won't touch I know I know but I've always been shameless

私じゃ駄目ですか

Am I not good enough?

ダーリン　 全部あなたにあげる お遊び夢中でなんて狼狽

darling I'll give you everything What dismay to be so entranced in play

ダーリン　 いっか忘れておくれ 終わりが来るのを待っているわ

Darling Please forget this once I'm waiting for the end to come

ダーリン　 全部あなたにあげる お気持ちはたんと愛で頂戴

Darling I'll give you everything Please give me feelings full of love

ダーリン　 いつか認めておくれ その日が来るのを待っているわ

Darling Acknowledge me someday I'm waiting for that day to come

ダーリン

僕にだって ねえ 未来に駆けていけ 祈るような死線へ

Even I can race into the future towards the prayerful verge of death

怒りに身を任せ時に冷静でいて

Surrender yourself to anger; at times keep calm

契りを交わした少年 あの頃みたいな今日が もう来ないとして

Oh boy who exchanged vows, even if a day resembling those times won’t come again,

ただ声を出していけ 気楽にいこうぜ 常識なんて知らんぜ 聡明な瞳で世界を知る 溢れるこの想いよいざ 迎えてくれよ拍手喝采で

just let out your voice Take it easy Not caring about common sense, you'll discover the world with sensible eyes These overflowing feelings, come, welcome me with an applause

起死回生の正体が 絶望の淵に立たされる言葉が 辛い痛い帰りたい場所もないくらい吐き出せぬこの夜も

The nature of revival [from the brink of death], the words that bring one to the depths of despair, and this night when I can't utter even how it's painful, it hurts, I have no place to call home

いつだって 馬鹿ばっかりやって ショボい夢掲げては清々 ここでくたばったって 別にいいけどつまんない冗談

(I’m) always just playing the fool finding relief in holding onto a depressing dream Even if I dropped dead right here I wouldn’t mind, but it'd be a dull joke

愛情の正体が 苦しまぬように惑う 地獄など 最高のショータイムか何も失うものなんてない今ほどの

The nature of love is to be beguiled not to suffer, hell, etc. and even the present where there’s no such thing as the greatest showtime, or a thing you can’t lose

クソしょうもない称賛に敬礼 縋って這い上がれこの精鋭 普通が欲しかった ただそれだけだったんだ

I bow to the shitty worthless praise, cling onto and overcome this elite I just wanted normality, that’s all there was to it

錆びたこの眼だけが 君をみよう

Only these rusty eyes will watch you

夜はまだ明けぬまま 夢をみよう

While it’s still not dawn, let’s dream

僕にだって ねえ 未来に駆けていけ 祈るような死線へ

Even I can race into the future towards the prayerful verge of death

怒りに身を任せ時に冷静でいて

Surrender yourself to anger; at times keep calm

契りを交わした少年 あの頃みたいな今日が もう来ないとして

Oh boy who exchanged vows, even if a day resembling those times won’t come again,

ただ声を出していけ 気楽にいこうぜ 常識なんて知らんぜ 聡明な瞳で世界を知る 溢れるこの想いよいざ 迎えてくれよ拍手喝采で

just let out your voice Take it easy Not caring about common sense, you'll discover the world with sensible eyes These overflowing feelings, come, welcome me with an applause

Silver: *gasp*

Silver: Why… are you… here…? I’m in… a hospital?

???: “I’ll go call the doctor.”

Silver: A blue paper bag…? Does it belong to him…? … Huh? I can see… colors?

*knock knock*

*sliding doors open*

Doctor: “Excuse me.”

*footsteps*

Doctor: “Yes, you seem fine. You’re really lucky someone found you so quickly.”

Silver: “... Yeah…”

Doctor: “You shouldn’t ride a boat while drunk. If you were found just a minute later it would have been a close call.”

Silver: “... Really…?”

Doctor: “Well then, you rest up now.”

*footsteps, sliding doors open*

???: “Your mother called me. She said you were in a serious condition so she wanted me to be by your side. She’s not fit for that, she said. I’m not the one to talk, but I was so worried I ran here immediately.”

Silver: … A beauty mark… Just like… mine and Mashiro’s.

Father: “Oh right, Silver-kun.”

*paper bag rustling*

Father: “I have something I’ve been wanting to give you for a while.”

Silver: “... What is it?”

Father: “Truth is I should have given this to you during his funeral, but…” 

*handing silver the bag*

Father: “In that letter, he asked me to give you this camera.”

Silver: Grandpa’s… Camera…

Father: “Thank you so much… For being Mashiro’s friend. I’m really… really grateful.”

Silver: He’s [bowing] so deeply…

Father: “Thank you. And… I’m sorry for everything.”

Silver: “... No… Thank you too. For letting me meet him.”

Father: “…! Then… I’ll be taking my leave here.”

*footsteps, sliding doors open and close*

*paper rustling*

Silver: His… letter.

*drip*

[“Promise” by Eve starts playing, i break down]

Silver: Dear…Ishiki SIlver.

Gin, it’s been a while. It’s my first time writing a letter, so I’m a bit nervous. I’m sorry about what happened at the airport.

*Silvers voice blends into Mashiro’s*

I always wanted to tell you the truth, but I couldn’t muster up the courage. Because I thought you would be hurt. And… I was scared you’d hate me. You’re the very first friend I made; I held you dear, I wanted you by my side, so I wasn’t even able to tell you something so important. It’s unforgivable, isn’t it? After all, I’m the one responsible for breaking your family apart. Maybe this letter won’t even reach you. It might get thrown away before anyone even reads it, or my dad might throw it away after reading its contents. So let me write this in advance. You absolutely must deliver this letter.  Hey, Gin. The truth is, I met you a long time ago. We were on a tour boat, and we looked at each other as we held onto our cameras. You may not remember it, but I remember that moment even now. Because that's when I saw colors. Colors are amazing. When you see them, it really feels like the world is alive.  What allowed me to feel that was you. When I was with you, Gin, for some reason I felt cheerful. I felt like I was alive. So that’s why when you asked me to look for colors together I was incredibly happy. Because it felt like you asked me to look for the meaning of life. You might have already forgotten that promise. But I’ll remember it my whole life. Ishiki Silver-kun. To me, you were an irreplaceable color. Thank you so, so much. P.S. It seems like I won’t be able to take photos anymore, so please use this camera. Look for freedom with this camera, and one day when you feel like forgiving me — please show me those memories. It’s a promise. —Niiro Mashiro

*beep* *beep* *beep*

Silver: What is… this?

*beep* *beep* *beep*

Silver: My back…? And… my smile?

Silver (and me): *crying*

Silver: “Aah… It’s not fair…”

―――

SIlver: After that, when I was discharged, I went out under the blue sky for the first time after a while. I longed for this day. Because I wanted to take photos of the world and show it to him. Just like in middle school, with excitement in my chest and a ticket in my hand, I boarded a ship and pressed the shutter button.

*glister, shutter sound*

Silver: The world was alive. The world through the camera lens is beautiful. As long as our promise remains, I’ll never turn back again. So one day, let’s meet in a dream again. The one-shot we promised each other starts here.

～～～

as an afterword, this radio drama was based off a novel that won in a contest held by WonderWord back in 2020! you can read the novel (in japanese) here! if for whatever reason you haven't listened to "promise" or haven't watched the MV yet you can find it here!

*gulp gulp*

Akamine: “Huuuh? But there’s lots of black and white photos! Can’t you take some with that vibe?”

Silver: “I can’t. I don’t own a camera anyway.”

Akamine: “Seriously? But you loved it so much…”

Silver: Well, I guess to put it precisely, it got burned.

Akamine: “Say, it’s because of what happened 7 years ago, isn’t it? The thing with Niiro…?”

Silver: “Who knows.”

*lighter clicking*

Akamine: “Smoking’s not allowed here.”

Silver: *sigh*

Akamine: “Well, I won’t force you. But please give it a thought! I seriously loved your photos! So I’d really want you to capture my once-in-a-lifetime memories!”

Silver: Sorry…

―――

Silver: It’s been a while since I’ve gone drinking during the day — and since I’ve seen Akamine as well. Perhaps that’s why, having gotten carried away and having one too many drinks, for some reason my unsteady legs carried me towards the ocean where Mashiro and I took photos together for the first time. And so, before I realized, I found myself onboard a ship. By the time I noticed I was feeling sick, it was already too late. So, having no choice, I looked for a plastic bag [inside my backpack]. And there it was — that broken camera. I see. Did I bring it with me to give it a burial?

Silver: “AaAaAAGH!!!”

*splash*

Silver: “….. Hahaha…”

Silver: I should smoke one for the occasion…

*ship horn* *burst*

???: ”You’ll fall!”

Silver: “Did… I just imagine that…?” *sigh*

Mashiro: “I finally found you.”

*shutter sound*

Silver: No… way…

Mashiro: “It’s been a while.”

Silver: But… you’re…

Mashiro: “I thought you’d be here.”

Silver: “Wh… y…”

Mashiro: “Because this is the place of your memories.”

SIlver: He looks like an adult, but… could this really be…

Mashiro: “I figured if there’s somewhere you’d be, it’d be here.”

SIlver: No, it can’t be…

Mashiro: “Aw, you threw the camera away… Even though we made a promise.”

Silver: “Pro… mise…”

Mashiro: “That we would look for colors together, that you would look for freedom.”

Silver: “R… right…”

Mashiro: “You haven’t gone to see the world?”

Silver: Please… Don’t look at me with those sincere eyes!

Mashiro: “Aren’t you a liar~ I didn’t take you for that sort of a guy.”

Silver: “... You hate me, don’t you?”

Mashiro: “Why?”

Silver: “Be… cause…”

Mashiro: “Let’s walk!”

Silver: “Walk where? We’re on a ship―”

*scenery changing*

Silver: “... A promenade? There’s… no one here?”

Mashiro: “How nostalgic~”

Silver: “This scenery…”

Mashiro: “I can’t hate you. I can’t. Ahaha.”

*running footsteps*

Silver: “Mashiro!”

*footsteps slow down*

Mashiro: “You finally called out to me.”

Silver: What’s with that expression…? On top of that, I’ve never seen you running―

Mashiro: “That’s right. We’re inside of a dream.”

Silver: “...!”

Mashiro: “As expected, you figured it out immediately. Huff!” *hop*

*hopping on gravel*

Silver: “We’re on railroad tracks… is this safe?”

Mashiro: “This is a dream so it’s safe. Well, formally, rather than a dream it’s more appropriate to say… we’re inside your heart, I guess?”

Silver: “Hu…h…”

Silver: Monochrome scenery as far as the eye can see. Even if this isn’t reality, I still can’t see colors, huh. I guess it makes sense since we’re inside my heart.

Mashiro: “I don’t hate you, Gin. You’ve always been someone I admired.”

Silver: Admired…? Me?

Mashiro: “I always knew about you. Ever since I was a kid, there was something troubling my father.”

Silver: Mashiro… you… are talking about something I don’t know… inside my heart?

Mashiro: “One day, I snuck a look into a pocket diary my father held dear. And inside of it was a photo he treasured — a photo of a boy. That’s right — it was you.

Silver: That can’t…

Mashiro: “I was really confused seeing a photo of someone who really looked like my father, to be honest. But after that I became more and more curious, and I soon learned the truth from a conversation between my parents.”

Silver: “You… remembered… me?”

Mashiro: “At first I was really troubled. I felt jealous of a brother I didn’t even know, and I was furious to death. But more than anything, I was so shocked that I got a bad fever.

Silver: Aah…

Mashiro: “The next day, I couldn’t see colors anymore. I was in despair. Why only me? How? I thought how everything in this world should just disappear.”

Silver: He’s… just like me.

Mashiro: “One day, my father took me on a tour boat in Tokyo. He told me he learned photography from the father of someone he once loved, and that’s when he taught me how to use a camera.”

Silver: Grandpa…

Mashiro: “And you see, that’s where I met an amazing boy. He held a big camera and just photographed the horizon straight ahead. So I got curious what he was taking a photo of and tried to stand on the same spot and take a photo the same way.”

Silver: …!

Mashiro: “He noticed me as I was doing it though~ But when our eyes met, it felt like the whole world suddenly gained color. Whether by instinct, I felt like I wanted to get to know him.

SIlver: Mashiro… you…

Mashiro: “But at the same time, when I saw his face, I knew. That boy was the one from the photo that I was so furious about. So I thought… We could never be friends.”

part 2 audio

Silver: You were always…

Mashiro: “What a cruel coincidence… To think we’d meet in such a place. Maybe, if we were born together as brothers with no real boundaries between us, maybe we could have been running around more places together. I was frustrated.”

SIlver: … always…

Mashiro: “Back when I transferred in middle school, I was surprised to see your name, and also terribly happy. I knew about you, but you didn’t know about me. I admired you, always surrounded by friends. I wanted to get closer to you, but on the other hand I also didn’t. I had mixed feelings.”

Silver: … more troubled than I thought…

Mashiro: “When I learned about you not having a dad, I thought I was probably someone to be hated. I was afraid that when you’d find out about me you’d get hurt, so I tried to avoid you at school.”

SIlver: And yet I…

Mashiro: “But then one day, you reached out to me about the program for the school festival. To be honest, it felt like a dream.”

Silver: … I hurt you, and now I’m seeing this convenient illusion…?

Mashiro: “When you invited me to look for colors together, I was really happy. Getting to know you was so much fun, I tried to forget about the unfortunate circumstances. That’s why I paid for my sins. I knew you’d get hurt once you’d find out about the truth, and yet…”

Silver: But… I find myself thinking — if this is a dream I never want to wake up. I want to stay like this, forever.

*rain droplets*

Mashiro: “I’m sorry, Gin. I always wanted to apologize.”

Silver: No! Stop! You’re not the one who should apologize! The one at fault… is me…!

*ba-dump ba-dump*

Mashiro: “Say, Gin… You don’t take photos anymore?”

Silver: “H… how could I… all by myself… carefreely… do the things I like…”

SIlver: After all, aren’t I the one who let you die? I pretended to be the lone main character of a tragedy and childishly kept blaming you. 

Silver: “Hey, Mashiro… Please tell me the truth! Inside my memories, you’ve always been telling me to apologize! You’ve been saying how everything would be better if I were gone!”

Silver: Even I realize the Mashiro inside my memories and the one inside my heart are different. But…

Silver: “Please don’t apologize!! If you apologize, then I…”

*bursting sound mixed with bubbles and hissing*

Silver: What… is that…? A deep red… monster…?

Mashiro: “Gin…?”

Silver: At this rate, it will swallow me…

Mashiro: “Hey, Gin…”

Silver: “Mashiro. I’m sorry.”

*heavy splash*

Mashiro: “GIN!!!”

*bubbles*

Silver: Why is he so desperate? Haha. It’s just a dream though. Strange… Can you shed tears under water? If I stay like this I’ll [sink] forever… and ever…

Mashiro: “Don’t die! Don’t die!!!” 

Silver: Head first…

Mashiro: “Gin!!!”

Silver: Mashiro? You fell in too? Why?

Mashiro: “Open your eyes!!”

Silver: …!

Mashiro: “Don’t run away, Gin! You said it yourself — that you’ll look for freedom! Yet you’re breaking that promise, and willingly giving in to death! Don’t give me that!

Silver: “There’s no way I can look for freedom! You died…”

Mashiro: “So…! So look for it for me too! Didn’t you say you’d look for colors with me? Gin. Don’t blame yourself anymore! When you laugh freely, when you take photos — that’s the you I love.

Silver: “...!”

Mashiro: “Please. This is my… last wish.”

Silver: He’s… reaching out to me―

*scenery changing*

Silver: Aaaah!!! The… the colors are―

Mashiro: “Look. It’s beautiful, isn’t it? This moment where everything gains color is what I was looking for while taking photos with you.”

Silver: “... Yeah…”

Mashiro: “Gin. Go see the world, for me too.”

Silver: “But I… [said] such cruel things to you…”

Mashiro: “I don’t mind.”

Silver: “Don’t lie!”

Mashiro: “Yeah. That was a lie. I actually really minded. Because I really wanted to meet you.”

Silver: “... Why?”

Mashiro: “I wanted you to forgive me. I wanted you to smile again.”

Silver: “No! I should be the one apologizing! I’m sorry… I’m sorry, Mashiro!”

Mashiro: “Then we’re even. Say, about that wish I mentioned…”

Silver: “No… no way! I already threw away my camera and I can no longer…”

Mashiro: “Then I’ll give you this.”

Silver: “Huh?”

Mashiro: “It used to be your camera, so this should do, right?”

Silver: “I don’t want this! I’ll be taking photos alone! If that’s the case, I’ll just stay here! That way we can once more―”

Mashiro: “That’s no good, Gin. You felt it too, didn’t you? How small this world is.”

Silver: “That’s―!!”

Mashiro: “The more you see the world, the more freedom this place will gain, and the more colors you’ll get to show me.”

Silver: Don’t go!!

Mashiro: “If you keep chasing your dreams, memories will flood this place in return.”

Silver: Please wait! Wait!!

Mashiro: “I want to see that.”

Silver: “Mashiro―”

Mashiro: “Hey, Gin. Show me more of the world unknown to me!”

Silver: That’s…

Mashiro: “And then, when you’ve made lots of memories…”

Silver: … not fair…

Mashiro: “... let’s meet again inside a dream!”

Silver: I can only answer like this…

Silver: “Yeah… You got it”

Mashiro: *laughs* “It’s a promise.”

Classmate: “Niiro-kun and Ishiki-kun, you’re always together, kinda like twins~”

Silver: “I’m so tired of hearing that…”

Classmate: “When you’re not together, it feels kinda wrong.”

Mashiro: “I can’t even laugh at that…”

Classmate: “Your personalities are completely different though -- like a prince and a crude man.“

Silver: “Oi, oi!”

Mashiro: *coughing*

Silver: “… Have you been alright lately? If you’re feeling unwell then--”

Mashiro: “Sorry-- Don’t worry about it…”

Akamine: “Gin! Do you have a moment?”

*footsteps*

Silver: “What is it?”

Akamine: “Well you see… A senpai from the soccer club wanted me to ask you for help with the club photo and…”

Silver: “Why bother?”

Akamine: “Apparently he's really particular about it… He said he wanted like a sunset behind us, so that we look cool.”

Silver: “What the hell even is that idea, isn’t that a bit too abstract… What does that have to do with soccer anyway?”

*thud*

*gasp*

Silver: “Mashiro!!!”

Girl: “Someone call the teacher!!!”

Akamine: “I’ll go!!!”

Silver: “Mashiro! Oi! Hang in there!”

*chatter*

―――

*door sliding open*

Nurse: “Ishiki-kun, thank you for coming along. It seems Niiro-kun’s parents are coming, so you can go now if you want.”

Silver: “I… see…”

Silver: It was just anemia… it seems…

*door sliding open*

Silver: “If you'll excuse me then.”

*door sliding shut*

*footsteps*

Silver: Huh…!?

*door sliding open in the distance*

Man: “Excuse me, I’m Niiro.“

Nurse: “Oh, Mashiro’s father, you came quick. Your son is right over here…”

*door sliding shut in the distance*

Silver: No… way…

Silver: That’s… That face is…

―――

*sound of simmering and chopping*

Silver: “Hey… About my father… Where is he right now, what is he doing?”

*chopping stops abruptly*

Silver’s mom: “Why are you asking?”

Silver: “Ah, well, I just got curious…”

Silver’s mom: “I don’t know. Once I went into labor to you it was over between us. How many times do I have to tell you that?”

Silver: “He had an affair… right?”

Silver’s mom: “That’s right, he had an affair. I don’t want to talk about a man who has children with other women and then leaves.”

Silver: “……”

Silver: “Um so… About this other kid… By any chance, is he Niiro Mashi--“

*slam*

Silver’s mom: “I told you, didn’t I? That you can’t get close to him. Why don’t you listen to what your mother says?”

Silver: “I didn’t get close to him! It’s just that I’m often told by my classmates we look alike, so I just thought what if…”

Silver’s mom: “You can’t.”

Silver: “Ah. Mm. Of course.”

Silver’s mom: “I told you, he will take everything away from you, didn’t I? It’s because of that boy we were tossed away. I was… and you were too.”

*drip drip*

Silver: I wonder since when is it… that mom stopped smiling. This slender, skinny back, and this place where I’m always faulted for everything - If father hadn’t had an affair, if he hadn’t had a child with another person, maybe, just maybe I would have had more freedom.

Silver’s mom: “Don’t talk to me about these people ever again.”

Silver: “Ok…”

Silver: All this time, I always thought I wanted to run away from this place. I even spoke to him about wanting freedom, when all along the one who stole that freedom away from me was actually…

Silver: …Hey, Mashiro. What was it you were thinking when you said you thought I hated you?

―――

*sound of airplane taking off*

Silver: After that, I avoided Mashiro for some time. I say that, but ever since the day he collapsed, he hasn’t been coming to school. We haven’t been in touch -- I guess that’s the more appropriate way to put it. So, as if time simply drifted by, a day like this had to come. To my misery, we ended up going to Kyushu together, the place where Mashiro used to live. This is nothing but torure.

Mashiro: “Gin… Are you angry about something?”

Silver: “We’re done for the day.”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “I don’t feel like taking photos.”

Mashiro: “Why…?” 

Silver: “I told you before, didn’t I? I don’t take photos when I’m angry or bored.”

Mashiro: “But--”

Silver: “I’m bored when I’m with you.”

Mashiro: “But you even bought the tickets…”

Silver: “Tickets…? Right… I paid for you. I don’t need the money so…”

*footsteps*

Mashiro: “Wait!!! What do you mean bored? Gin, I’ve been looking forward to this day since way back and--”

Silver: “That’s exactly WHAT I MEAN!!! I’M BORED WHEN I’M WITH YOU!!!”

*crowd chatter*

Mashiro: “That’s… You never mentioned such a thing before--”

Silver: “There’s no way I could have said anything!!! You deliberately hid everything away and laughed innocently!!!”

Mashiro: “What… actually happened…? Gin…”

Silver: “Playing ignorant, are we… You already know.” 

Mashiro: “…Know… what?”

Silver: “About your father!”

Mashiro: “!!!”

Silver: “Who would've guessed your father is my father too…”

Mashiro: “That…”

Silver: “You knew everything, didn’t you! You almost managed to deceive me.”

Mashiro: “That’s not true! I kept trying to tell you--”

Silver: “You can keep saying that however much you want now! Was it fun watching me from the side while I knew nothing?”

Mashiro: “Gin…”

Silver: See? You’re not denying it. You can’t, can you? You’re horrible. Disgusting. The way my mom is acting all weird, and my lack of freedom too, all of it-- It’s all his fault.

Silver: “Looking for freedom, searching for colors… Who cares about any of that anymore!”

Mashiro: “I…!!!”

Silver: What is this…? Tears? My vision is blurring…

Silver: Hey, why are you making such a hurt expression? I thought we were friends, and yet to you I was just a half-sibling!

Silver: “Don’t ever speak to me again.”

Mashiro: “Wait, Gin! I--” *coughing*

Silver: “Having another coughing fit…? How irritating… How about you have your kind father come get you again!?”

Mashiro: “Wait…! Gin!!!”

part 2 audio

Silver: I did not look back that day. Because I didn’t want to see his face as he acted like a pitiful son only so that he could get his father’s attention. His faint voice got more and more distant, before it finally weakly faded. And that image of Niiro Mashiro was the last one I saw.

―――

*school bell*

Teacher: “Niiro will be unable to attend class due to health issues. He’s been hospitalized for the time being.”

*chatter*

Akamine: “Hey… Will Niiro be ok?”

Silver: “He'll be fine. Anyways…”

Silver: They’re probably blowing all this out of proportion. He’ll come back to school with that innocent look of his. That’s right. He, Niiro Mashiro, should just disappear.

*distorted sounds*

Akamine: “Heey. Heeey!”

Silver: Darkness…?

Akamine: “Heeey I’m talking to you!”

Silver: What is this? This… isn't anemia?

Distorted voice: “Hey. What’s wrong? What’s wrong?”

Silver: “STAY AWAY!!!”

Akamine: “Huh!?”

Silver: “I… was imagining it?”

Silver: I thought I saw Akamine’s red hair attack me…

Akamine: “Seriously, are you ok?”

Silver: “... It’s nothing.” 

Silver: Everything is back to normal… What the hell was that?

―――

*footsteps*

Silver: It’s been half a year since Mashiro got hospitalized. There’s still no sign of him at school.

Silver: “I’m home.”

Silver: What’s this smell…!?

*fast footsteps*

Silver: Mom?

*sound of crackling fire*

Silver: “What are you doing?”

Silver’s mom: “Silver. You’re back. There’s something you hid from me, isn’t there?”

Silver: “... Huh? Hid what?”

Silver’s mom: “Are you getting along with his son?”

Silver: “... What?”

Silver’s mom: “I can’t believe it. After everything I told you… Why didn’t you listen to me?”

Silver: … They’re burning.

Silver’s mom: “Tell me Silver, why?” 

Silver: The photos… and the camera too. Everything is burning.

Silver: “Why are you doing this?”

Silver’s mom: “Why am I doing this? Why are you doing this!? After how much I told you not to get closer to Niiro Mashiro!”

Silver: My memories are turning into ashes, into smoke… and disappearing. Fleeting so easily. Did mine and his relationship disappear like this too?.

Silver: “I CAN HANG OUT WITH ANYONE I WANT!!! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TELL ME AROUND THAT MUCH!? 

Silver’s mom: “...! Is this how you speak to your mother?”

Silver: “IF YOU'RE MY MOTHER THEN STOP MAKING ME FEEL THIS TRAPPED! STOP PUSHING YOUR AFFAIRS ONTO YOUR CHILD!!!”

Silver’s mom: “...!”

Silver: Why do they look so hurt? Both mom and him…

Silver: “FUCK!”

*hitting/kicking*

*fast footsteps*

Silver: What the hell? What the fuck!? To hell with everyone... I’ve had it… This small world should just disappear.

―――

*inside train*

Silver: After that, wanting to get far away from that place, I boarded the train. This was as far as my world could reach. As I thought that, I came to the bridge where me and him met up that day.

*boat horn*

Silver: Unable to see what was ahead, I was running in a pitch-dark world where colors seemed to disappear from the edges. When I came to, I was holding the camera that was burnt to char-black. In a trance, I pressed the shutter button. But it did nothing, I could see nothing. Color was disappearing from my world.

―――

*chatter, school bell*

*steps* 

Teacher: “Good morning. I have a very sad announcement to make. Niiro Mashiro, who has been absent from school for a long time, passed the other day.”

Silver: ... Huh? This can’t… be happening.

Teacher: “We got a call about the wake from Niiro-kun’s family…”

―――

*rain*

Silver: To be honest, I lost a track of time. I can’t believe that day when he had a coughing fit was the last time I'd see him. 

Woman: “I’m sorry for your loss.”

Silver: When I was at the wake, I met eyes with my real father for the first time. He looked at me like he wanted to say something, but I pretended not to notice and stubbornly avoided him. 

Classmate A: “Apparently he had a serious condition…”

Classmate B: “I heard he moved from Kyushu to Tokyo during middle school because the hospitals here are good…”

Classmate C: “Is that why…? I had no idea…”

Classmate B: “He seemed cheerful, but now that I think about it, he always just watched during gym class.”

Classmate D: “He also seemed pale at times, and he often had coughing fits, didn’t he…”

Classmate A: “But man, a classmate dying really makes you uneasy…”

Classmate D: “Stuff like this really happens…”

Silver: The conversation around me sounded like it was behind some curtain.

Classmate B: “Ishiki-kun might know more details.”

Classmate D: “You’re right. Those two got along and all…”

Classmate B: “If we ask him, we’ll probably learn more about Niiro-kun”

Silver: ... I don’t know… I don’t know… anything.

Silver: Everything I’ve done with him was fabricated, even the abundance of photos we took. Maybe the real Mashiro was somewhere within those memories. I wonder what expression he had, what he was feeling as he watched my back. Now I’ll never know even that. Yes, never.

*sliding door*

Silver: Mom and I stopped talking as much whenever I return home. In exchange, she treats me like I don’t exist. I don’t know anymore if this is what I wished for.

Silver: … Is this freedom? Then why are the colors I see so faded? What is this? It’s touching my face, and even when I rub my eyes, it won’t go away.

Silver: I can’t see a single color anymore.

～～～

―――

*school bell rings*

Mashiro: “My name is… Niiro… Mashiro… Nice to meet you.

Silver: A transfer student?

Silver: What a gloomy guy…

Teacher: “Let’s see, you can sit next to the window in the back.”

Akamine: “Hey, Gin*, did you hear the rumors about Niiro?” *Silver’s name would typically be read as “Gin” in Japanese

Silver: “Rumors?”

Akamine: “About how he can’t actually see colors.”

Silver: “What’s that about?”

Akamine: “I'm telling you, he can’t see colors!”

Silver: “Huh? Based on what?”

Akamine: “When I saw him earlier, he ignored the stoplight.”

Silver: “Maybe he just didn’t notice it?”

Akamine: “He graded his short test with a blue pen.”* *Short tests are usually graded by the students themselves

Silver: “Maybe he ran out of red ink?”

Akamine: “His hair is green.”

Silver: “And?”

Akamine: “He doesn’t look like the type to dye it, so Kondo poked him about it! He asked him if it’s natural!”

Silver: “Eeh…”

Akamine: “And then when he mentioned ‘green’, apparently the guy looked confused!”

Silver: “Did he not intend to dye it green?”

Akamine: “According to him, it’s natural!”

Silver: “Kondo was bothering him so the guy just answered half-mindedly.”

*slurp*

Silver: “Alright, I won this argument! Good night.”

Akamine: “No you didn’t… Show some interest will you!”

Silver: *yawn*

Akamine: “It’s a colorless world! Aren’t you into that sorta thing?”

Silver: “There’s a big difference between not being able to see colors and seeking a colorless world for yourself. Are you stupid?”

Akamine: “But y’know, don’t you think you and Niiro kind of look alike?”

Silver: “Huh? What part?”

Akamine:  “Your eyes or… lips maybe? Here, this part looks completely the same! Your sexy beauty mark~”

Silver: “You idiot. I’ll remove this with a laser one day.”

Akamine: “Why?”

Silver: “Because I hate it. Don't even get me started.”

Silver: That’s right. I hate this thing. Whenever I look at it, I get reminded of my father who left my mom.

Silver: “I'll leave that house as soon as possible, remove this beauty mark, and make a living off photography. Man, I can’t wait to be an adult.”

Akamine: “Now don’t you just have it all figured out, your plans for the future that is.”

Silver: “Shut up!”

―――

Yamauchi: “Alright then, we came to a decision that Niiro-kun and I will be a part of the school festival planning committee.”

*school bell rings*

Mashiro: “Um… Yamauchi-san…”

Yamauchi: “Yes?”

Mashiro: “I have an idea for the exhibit…”

Yamauchi: “Huuh… What is it?”

Mashiro: “An aquarium.”

Yamauchi: “Ooh! Like fish swimming in a water tank? We certainly have one, so it could work!”

Mashiro: “Um, well… I thought instead of real fish, maybe we could fill a tank with deep blue water and have the fish be light projections, so that it looks like they're swimming in the sky?

Yamauchi: “Swimming in the sky…? I find that a bit hard to imagine…”

Mashiro: “Is that so… Maybe you’re right…”

Yamauchi: “But how about you try it anyway?”

Mashiro: “A-are you sure?”

Yamauchi: “Well then, how about you go ask Ishiki to help you with the photos for the flyers?”

Mashiro: “Ishiki-kun?”

Yamauchi: “He’s a part of the photography club! He’s gotta help for these sort of occasions at least! I’ll talk to him.”

Mashiro: “I see…”

―――

Silver: “So? Is this spot good for the photos?”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “I said is this spot good?”

Mashiro: “Ah… Yeah… It’s fine…”

Silver: He sure is gloomy…

Mashiro: “Maybe it’s weird after all…”

Silver: “What is?”

Mashiro: “Goldfish swimming in the sky… Yamauchi-san also said it’s hard to imagine…”

Silver: “Huh? Was that your idea?”

Mashiro: “Ah… Yeah… It was mine”

Silver: “Really? That’s amazing!”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “The color combination of the sky and goldfish is great, and the concept is so free and out of the box too… Oh, how about we add an ocean to the composition too? Something like the light enclosed between the sky and the ocean, like it’s captured between the two blues, and the goldfish are swimming there, creating an illusion like they’re flying and…!”

Mashiro: “…”

Silver: “… Ah, sorry.”

Mashiro: “...Amazing! That idea didn’t occur to me at all!”

Silver: “… Can you really not see colors?”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “Ah, no, sorry! Forget I said that! It’s probably a mistake or I just assumed wrong or…”

Mashiro: “… No, that’s right.”

Silver: “Huh?”

Mashiro: “How did you know?”

Silver: “It’s just that… Um… Sometimes I hear rumors…”

Mashiro: “So it was rumors…”

Silver: “Ah but it’s not like I believed them, it’s just that your idea is really good, and I thought it’d be a surprise if someone who can’t see colors could imagine such color composition! Simply put, I think you’re amazing!”

Silver: What am i saying?

Mashiro: “From my point of view, you’re the one who’s amazing, Ishiki-kun…”

Silver: “Huh? … By the way, you know my name?”

Mashiro: “Of course I do, we’re classmates.”

Silver: “That’s true but… I thought you didn’t like me.”

Mashiro: “No way! On the contrary, I thought you… hated...”

Silver: “Hm? What did you say?”

Mashiro: “Ah, it’s nothing!”

Silver: “Hmm, but why sky and goldfish?”

Mashiro: “Honestly I just thought it’d be pretty… When I picture the color combination I just get the urge to express it somehow.”

Silver: “Color combination? Can you tell colors apart?”

Mashiro: “When I was little I used to be able to see them. Though I can only combine them in my head now…”

Silver: “Hey, Niiro.”

Mashiro: “Hm? What is it?”

Silver: “Why don’t you try doing photography?”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “I think it suits you. You have a good sense for it and your ideas are great too.”

Mashiro: “Ah, but… I don’t have a camera.”

Silver: “I have an extra one so I’ll lend it to you!”

Mashiro: “But…”

Silver: “Just give it a shot! I'm interested in seeing the world through your eyes.”

Mashiro: “I don’t think… the world I see is that interesting though…”

Silver: “You won’t know unless you try!”

Mashiro: “Is… that so…”

Silver: “Yeah!”

Mashiro: “Then… I guess I’ll… give it a shot…”

Silver: “Then how about you try taking some test photos this weekend while we’re getting more material for the flyers?”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “The ones with the sky, ocean and goldfish!”

Mashiro: “Umm…”

Silver: “Are you busy then?”

Mashiro: “… No, I’m free.”

Silver: “Great!”

Mashiro: “Then… I can’t wait”

―――

Silver: “Ah, there it is! Grandpa’s camera!”

Silver’s mom: “Silver.”

Silver: “Geh-”

Silver’s mom: “Is it true there’s a kid at school with the last name Niiro?”

Silver: “Huh?”

Silver’s mom: “Well?”

Silver: Mom’s in a bad mood again today…

Silver’s mom: “Hey, are you listening?”

Silver: “Why are you asking?”

Silver’s mom: “Don’t you 'why' me, I asked you a question.”

Silver: “No, there isn’t such a person.”

Silver’s mom: “Ok. But if there is, you can’t get close to him.”

Silver: “Again, why?”

Silver’s mom: “Why, why, you’re so annoying! When I say you can’t it means you can’t! If you get close to him everything will be taken away from you!”

silver: “What do you-”

Silver’s mom: *hits something* “That’s enough! Understood?”

Silver: “… Yes. Understood.”

Silver’s mom: “Good. Also, tell me when you’re ready to sell that white camera. Having you costs me money after all.”

Silver: “But this is from grandpa-”

Silver’s mom: “I'm taking it to the pawn shop next week.”

*doors slam shut*

Silver: But he bought it for me so that i could take good photos…

Silver: … She never listens to me. The conversation is always one-sided. She won’t even answer my questions.

Silver: I want to be free.

――― part 2 audio

Silver: “Aah not a cloud in the sky! I have a feeling we’ll get some good photos! Don’t you think so too?”

Mashiro: “Hey, is it really ok… for me to borrow this? This camera seems important to-”

Silver: “Yeah, it’s fine! I don’t really use her, so I feel a bit bad for her.”

Mashiro: “You really like photography, don’t you?”

Silver: “Do I?”

Mashiro: “You do! If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be speaking so fondly of it. It's proof you treasure it dearly. So… I'm sorry to borrow this from you.”

Silver: *mutters* “... You’re embarrassing me”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “Alright, let’s go!”

Mashiro: “Go… where? We’re not taking photos here?”

Silver: “You wanna go for a ship ride?”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “Ta-da!”

Mashiro: “Tickets!? That’s great!

Silver: “Hehe…”

Silver: “Niiro, have you been on a ship before?”

Mashiro: “Yeah, I have. When I was little I lived in Kyushu so I had a lot of opportunities to ride one.”

Silver: “Oooh? To go like fishing and stuff?”

Mashiro: “No, as means of transport. My school was about 15 minutes away by ferry.”

Silver: “For real? That sounds amazing…”

Mashiro: “What part of it?”

Silver: “Ah no, I mean, you’re so used to being close to the ocean… There’s a sense of freedom to that.”

Mashiro: “Freedom…”

Silver: “Yeah! I mean it feels like it’s such an unknown world to me, I guess you could say I'm a little jealous.”

Mashiro: “I'm…the one who’s jealous of you though.”

Silver: “Huh?”

Mashiro: “Do you long for freedom, Ishiki-kun?”

Silver: “Of course!”

Mashiro: “I see… That sounds nice.”

Silver: “Wait, why is that something to be jealous of?”

Mashiro: “Because wishing to become free and putting effort towards it already paves your way to freedom, doesn’t it?”

Silver: “Uuh… Sorry, I don’t really get it…”

Mashiro: “There’s some things people can only wish for…”

Mashiro: “... Hm? Are you coming?”

Silver: “Can you tell me more?”

Mashiro: “... Some things won't come true if you just wish for them. There’s people who only do that. Compared to them, putting effort towards your wish is really something to be jealous of.”

Silver: “Can you… not become free?”

Mashiro: “... I wonder about that… Come on, let’s go!”

―――

Silver: “Hey, how about you try snapping a photo?”

Mashiro: “But…” 

Silver: “We came here to take photos, right?” 

Mashiro: “... I don’t know how to use a camera.”

Silver: “Liar!”

Silver: You were playing around with it just now.

Silver: “Usually people who actually don’t know ask the moment they’re handed the camera.”

Mashiro: “That’s not always the case though…”

Silver: *sigh* “Why are you so reserved?”

Mashiro: “That’s because… The colors that I see are dim. So I can’t judge whether something is really pretty… You take photos after you think to yourself something looks pretty, right? I can’t do that, so…”

Silver: “Just now we spoke about freedom, yeah?”

Mashiro: “... Yeah…”

Silver: “I always take photos striving to be free. When I look back at the photos I took, I feel like I had some sort of freedom at that moment. I like recalling how much fun I had when I took them.”

Mashiro: “Because of… photos?”

Silver: “I mean think about it! Photos aren’t something you take when you’re angry or bored, right?”

Silver: Why am I talking about this?

Silver: “Just let your emotions take over and press the shutter button. Judging whether it ended up pretty or not comes on its own afterwards!”

Mashiro: “On its own… afterwards?”

Silver: “I'm telling you! Here, if you wanna become free let’s take one together.” 

Mashiro: “... You really are amazing, Ishiki-kun.”

Silver: “How come?”

Mashiro: “I never thought of photography as a way to become free.”

Silver: “Are you making fun of me?”

Mashiro: “I'm not!”

Silver: He finally took the camera in his hands.

Mashiro: “... Will I be able to see something too?”

Silver: “I don’t mean to brag but, the scenery through the camera looks more colorful to me. 

Mashiro: “Isn’t that a bad thing, Ishiki-kun?” 

Silver: “You’re really asking for a fight, huh?” 

Silver: This view through the camera lens… How can I convey it to him? … Stop getting distracted, back to work, back to work. Photos for the flyer, right… The sky and the ocean becoming one. The imagery of goldfish floating there…

*shutter sound*

Silver&Mashiro: “Just now…”

Silver: “The light-”

Mashiro: “The colors-” 

Silver&Mashiro: “Huh?”

*both laugh*

Silver: “Hey, did you see the really pretty light just now?”

Mashiro: “Rather than light, I saw amazing colors!”

Silver: “Huh? Colors?”

Mashiro: “Light?”

*both laugh*

Silver: “What kind of colors did you see?”

Mashiro: “Ah it was kind of like… It’s like suddenly everything was getting dyed blue from the end of the filter… And there was also like this red and yellow and…”

Silver: “Like rainbow-colored?”

Mashiro: “Rainbow? Ah, sorry, what color was the rainbow again?”

Silver: “It’s like glowing in seven different colors, like red and yellow and green!”

Mashiro: “Aah… That might be it… That’s probably it!”

Silver: “For real?”

Mashiro: “!”

Silver: “Isn’t that amazing?”

Mashiro: “It… kind of is but…”

Silver: “Right? Me too! I also saw the edge of the sky glow in the colors of the rainbow!”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “If you imagine goldfish swimming freely in this vivid scenery... Isn’t it wonderful?!”

Mashiro: “... It is!”

Silver: “Right?!”

Mashiro: “This is amazing, Ishiki-kun! Even for just a moment I could see so many colors! It somehow felt like the whole world suddenly gained color… The sky, the ocean… They sparkle like that!”

*drip*

Silver: “Huh?”

Mashiro: “What’s this…? Why…?”

Silver: Tears.

Mashiro: “... Sorry. Why am I…?”

Silver: “Maybe you were deeply moved?”

Mashiro: “Deeply moved…? Deeply… moved? Yeah… I was incredibly moved!”

Silver: “Hey, how did it feel seeing colors?”

Mashiro: “I'm not sure but… It was exciting! My heart kept pounding and I was so happy my chest hurt!”

Silver: He can make this expression too…

Mashiro: “Even though they’re both blue, the sky and the ocean were completely different! The clouds were white, and the waves were also white…! At that moment, I thought how it’s even more complex and beautiful than I had imagined…!”

Silver: His tears are beautiful…

Mashiro: “You said it’s called a rainbow, right? Anyway, it looked like lots of colors were swimming in a blue world… So I wanted to see it with my bare eyes and when I lowered the camera everything turned dull again but… It was amazing! Really!”

Silver: “I see…”

Silver: “… Hey Niiro. When I'm with you I feel like I can see a new, unknown world.”

Mashiro: “Huh?”

Silver: “I said it before too, but I take photos striving to be free!”

Mashiro: “... Yeah?”

Silver: “Hey Niiro, would you like to be able to see colors again?”

Mashiro: “... Huh?”

Silver: “To be honest, I don’t have the slightest clue why you can’t see colors. But you saw them for a moment just now, right? So to see them once again-- no, to see them many more times from now on, why don’t we take photos together?”

Mashiro: “... But…”

Silver: “Maybe you’ll find some lead!”

Mashiro: “I…”

Silver: “Hey, Niiro! Let’s see the world together!”

Mashiro: “... Yeah… I want to… see the world… Let’s see it together!”

Silver: “Alright! When we grow up let's travel all over the world together and take lots of photos so that I can look for freedom and you can look for colors! It’s a promise!”

Mashiro: “... Promise…?”

Silver: “Yeah! Promise!”

Mashiro: “... Got it, it’s a promise!”

～～～

so like the insane person i am, i decided to translate this radio drama the moment i listened to it!! it doesn't actually consists of parts, but due to audio upload limitations on tumblr i had to split this chonky boy, so sorry about that.. m(_ _)m

next episode comes out on august 15th, and i will hopefully translate that one too, so if you're interested stick around!!

見えない　見せない　両目塞いじゃって 『もう無い』　『そうかい』　騙されたフリ 王様気取りのカードチラつかせ 『こうなりゃ維持だ』と　乗せられた足

I can’t see, you won’t show me; I cover my eyes “I’m all out” “Is that so?” I pretend to be deceived You flash a card posing as a king “This will have to do” A phrase you’ve made your stepping stone

『いやいやそいつは偽者です』と 言われて気がつきゃ　もう手遅れね 何度も何度も騙されちゃって どうにも　こうにも　頭に来るぜ

“No, no, that one’s a fake” Once I realized you said that, it was already too late Over and over again I've been deceived Not this way, nor that way; you’re pissing me off

完全犯罪　成り立たせるわ 勢いあまって I kill you アリバイ作って　表の顔は いい子にしたフリ

I’ll commit a perfect crime I’m getting carried away I kill you Creating an alibi, I put up a front Pretending to be a good kid

勝ってうれしい　はないちもんめ あの子が欲しいの I want you 交換条件　認めさせない ジョーカー奪ってみせるから

Red rover, red rover, Let that kid come over² I want you I won’t accept these terms of exchange I will steal your joker

嘘つき仮面裏 本当は照れ隠し？ 教えてよ

On the other side of the liar’s mask Are you actually hiding embarrassment? Hey tell me

あっち　こっち　鬼さんこちら 手のなる方へ I want you ワンペア？　ツーペア？　いやフルハウス？ 手の内明かして

Over here, over here, catch me if you can Come this way¹ I want you One pair? Two pairs? No, a full house? Reveal your hand

完全犯罪　成り立たせるわ 勢い余って I love you

I’ll commit a perfect crime I'm getting carried away I love you

最後の切り札　差し出す前に 暴いてみせるから

Before I present my last trump card I will definitely expose you

本性？　本能？　本当？

Nature? Instinct? Truth?

_____ _____ _____ _____ _____ 

¹In the original, Gumi sings "Acchi, Kocchi, Onisan kochira; Te no naru hou e", which are words sang during a game of Mekakushi Oni. Mekakushi Oni is a traditional Japanese children's game similar to Blind Man's Bluff in the West, where one player is blindfolded and is meant to catch the other players who are singing a song. The literal translation of the lyrics would be "Mister demon, over here, over there; In the direction of the hands."

どうしてだろう？ あのスポットライトに照らされている その背中はまたこの手から遠ざかっていく

I wonder why? That back lit by a spotlight is getting further away from my grasp again

あなたみたいになれやしなくて あの月を追いかけるように 渇いた心は満たされないまま 一人になって　一人になって くすんだ夢を見続けてしまった なぞる僕たちは

I can't ever become like you As if chasing after that moon My craving heart remains unfulfilled Becoming alone, becoming alone We kept having dull dreams, we who imitate

ガラクタだって、ボロ切れだって その心臓が放つ血液には 僕だけの怒りがあった

Even if it’s junk, even if it’s rags, The blood that gushed out of my heart contained my own wrath

足りないのなんだったんだろう 神様に聞いてきたあとで 堕天使の弓矢に口止めされた

I wonder what I was missing After I came to ask god I was silenced by a fallen angel’s arrow

初めから知っていたんだよ 忘れた芝居をしてんだよ 貰いもんの剣を抱きしめている

I knew from the start I’m playing forgetful, holding close the sword I was given

何十回目の失望だろう？ いっそ何もかもを捨ててしまいたいと

How many tens of times have I been disappointed? I’d rather just throw it all away

きっと最後は何も残らない 愛も、紡いだ音も、名前も朽ちていく

I’m sure nothing will be left at the end Love, the assembled sounds, and my name too will all be forgotten with time

どうしてだろう？ この胸の奥にこびり付いている 冬の夜の静寂に似た孤独を

I wonder why? Stuck to the bottom of my chest was loneliness alike the silence of a winter night

あなたはきっと知りもしないで 一人星を見ていた 赤い目の僕に気も留めないまま 隣に立ったあなたは遠くて くすんだ夢も見えなくなってしまって それでも追い続けて

You probably knew nothing as you gazed at the stars alone, not paying mind to the red-eyed me You once stood next to me, but now you’re so far We’ve lost sight of our dull dreams Even so I continued chasing after them

偽物だって、真実(ほんとう)だって 今振り返ればただそこには ぼやけた記憶があった

Even if it’s a sham, even if it’s real, If i looked back now, there merely stood blurred memories

廃物と化したアイロニー　クリシェを抜け出したいのに 「また誰かの焼き直し？」 数多の星の屑たち　沈み消えゆくユースタシー 無慈悲な月の光

The irony that was reduced to junk; I want to break away from cliches, and yet "Another rehash of someone else?" The abundance of star scraps; the sinking, disappearing eustasy The merciless moonlight

「アイデンティティさえまやかし？」 「盗んででも愛が欲しい？」

“Is even your identity fake?” “Do you want love even if you have to steal it?”

羊のような雲が浮かんだ昼すぎ 懐かしい歌が風に揺れている あなたの声で教えて貰った言葉 今でも忘れぬように書き留めてる同じことを

A sheep-like cloud floated by, it’s just past noon A nostalgic song wavers in the wind The words I was told in your voice even now, not to forget them, I write down the same thing

あなたみたいになれやしなくて あの月を追いかけるように 渇いた心は満たされないまま 時間が経って時間が経って 振り返る時目を逸らさぬように なぞる僕たちは

I can't ever become like you As if chasing after that moon My craving heart remains unfulfilled Time passes, time passes So that we won’t tear our eyes away when we turn around we imitate

ガラクタだって、ボロ切れだって 醒めぬ夢を追っていった先には 僕だけの光がずっと

回答なんて持ってないよそんなの だいたい正解なんてつまんないって そうでしょ？ 気まぐれのせいそれって気のせい 黙ってりゃ犠牲になってくだけ うつらうつら続く日々に綻び

An answer? I don't have such a thing The correct answer is boring anyways Isn't that right? It’s because of caprice, in other words it’s in my head If you don’t speak up you’ll only be sacrificed A tear in the sluggishly passing days

CLOSET 始まらない なんにも知らない もうひとつも 愛さない

CLOSET It won’t begin I don’t know anything I will never love another one again

CLOSET 間違えない どうにもできない 痛みのその先を

CLOSET Without a mistake In no way can I stand what comes after pain

あなたみたいになりたかった ひとりごとを呟いた 知らないうちに飽きてしまった 後悔も全部

I wanted to be like you I mumbled to myself Before I knew it, I got fed up with my regrets and everything else

扉の外で声がして いつしか理由も忘れて 助けないその言葉に 決めつけられて生きてるの なんで

I heard a voice behind the door Before I knew it, I’d forgotten why Those helpless words determined my life Why

何回だって待ってたんだ知ってる 生存本能だって「解ってる」をやってる 喰らってる罵声　奪ってる個性 腐ってる和製の番狂わせ のらりくらり続く日々の移ろい

Countless times I waited, I’m aware It’s a survival instinct to always say “I know” The feasting boos, the tendency to take The rotten Japanese-made upset A change in the aimlessly passing days

CLOSET 始まらない なんにもできない もうひとつも 返せない

CLOSET It won’t begin I can’t do anything I will never return a single one again

CLOSET 間違えない なんてくだらない 痛みのその先へ

CLOSET Without a mistake Beyond such absurd pain

小さなこの部屋の扉を叩いている 知らない街へ連れ出していく 震える手を前に差し出している あなたに触れるまで

I knock on the door of this small room taking you out to an unfamiliar town Holding out my shaking hand until i feel you

CLOSET

ただ進め 手をかざした理由を 残さずTake back

Just go forward! The reason you reached out (for the light) take it all back

巡り巡る 答えを出せたのなら翔べる 夜の淵へ 傷跡は隠しながら 廻り廻る 時の中でさえも光る オレの行方を just prove myself

Going around and around If I find an answer I can leap towards the depths of the night while concealing my scars Turning and turning I will make it my place wherever shines even amidst time just (to) prove myself

通り過ぎたモノクロ 明滅するシグナル 馬鹿の振りして戯れた夜の街で嗤え 誰彼構わずブッ刺すStyle お前にゃ興味無いね

The monochrome I passed through The flickering signal Just act stupid and laugh in a playful night’s town! Stinging-everyone style If it’s not you I’m not interested, you know?

まだ響け かき鳴らせば遠くへ 飛ばすBy myself

Keep resounding! If I strum, I’ll fly towards somewhere far by myself

ゆらり揺れる 視界を切り裂くまま掴む 歪な影 触れていいのはおまえじゃねえ 曲がり曲がる 道の果てで届き当たる オレのシナリオ Just prove myself

Slowly swaying With my field of view cut off, I’ll seize the distorted shadow The one allowed to touch me is not you Twisting and twisting I arrive at the end of the street and face my scenario just (to) prove myself

いつもCrazy on, Crazy on イチがバチがでドラスティック Bring me higher, Bring me higher 傍若無人のFlying Bumblebee Bring it on, Bring it on 暴走Upside downくらいがいい No way、 Do not turn your back on me

Always crazy on, crazy on For it’s all or nothing it’s drastic Bring me higher, bring me higher Arrogant flying bumblebee Bring it on, bring it on Running wildly, about upside down will do No way, do not turn your back on me

巡り巡る 思いを馳せてもまだ辿る この景色は オレがオレで在るが故 廻り廻る 世界をひっくり返すまでの オレのシナリオ Just prove myself

Going around and around Even when riding my feelings I will still follow this scenery so that i can be myself Turning and turning my scenario of when I turn the world over just (to) prove myself

飛び込め風穴へ！I can fry forever 恐れずJust prove myself

おやすみ、かみさま 僕はやさしくできないまま おとなになって あなたを知って 遠い朝を待つ

Good night, God I couldn’t become kind Becoming an adult, and getting to know you, I wait for the distant morning

いち、に、さん、し 数えてる間に あいつらみんな 居なくなっていて なんかしあわせなおとなに なったみたいで それをうらやましく思ったりして

One, two, three, four While counting, they all disappeared and seemed to become happy adults I’ve thought about that with envy

おやすみ、かみさま 今日もやさしくできないまま おとなになって ひとりを知って 長い雨が止む

Good night, God Today I couldn’t be kind again Becoming and adult, and learning loneliness the long rain will stop

きっと日常はいつも鮮明で 言葉にするより残酷だ 格好付けるのにはもう遅いし 傷つける側になりたくないよ 少しずつ手を離して 少しだけ前を向いた まだあなたのゆめをみる

Surely the days are always clear and crueler than when put into words It’s too late to put up an act I don’t want to be the side that hurts someone Separating our hands bit by bit, I faced forward for just a bit I still dream of your dream

おやすみ、かみさま 僕はやさしくできないまま おとなになって あなたを知って、やがて くる朝を待つ

幽霊船のように放浪して 未来は何一つ いまだ変わらないまま

Wandering like a ghost ship the future is still unchanging one bit

さよなら さよなら さよなら 消滅してゆく 声も、心も 総てを奪い去って

Good bye Good bye Good bye My disappearing voice and heart, take them away

届かない 届かない 届かない どんなに願っても 今日がまた一つ死んでいく

They will not reach They will not  reach They will not  reach no matter how much I pray Today another one is dying

TVの向こう側で 成功者達が嗤っていたんだ 努力もしないくせに 僕らはそれを叩く

On the other side of the TV screen the successful people laughed Even though we put no effort we criticized that

こんなはずじゃないと 呟いても 世界は相も変わらず 止まっちゃくれないよ

“It’s not supposed to be this way” Even if i mutter that, the world as usual will not stop for me

このまま このまま このまま 終わりたくないよ 明日は必ず 頑張ってみせるから

I do not want I do not want I do not want it to end this way Tomorrow, without fail, I will definitely persist

変わらない 変わらない 変わらない どれだけねだっても 君が進まなきゃ、なにひとつ。

It will not change It will not change It will not change No matter how much I beg If you don’t go forward, nothing will [change]

さよなら さよなら さよなら 臆病だった日々 声よ、心よ 未来へと叫べよ

Good bye Good bye Good bye cowardly days My voice, and my heart, cry out towards the future!

足掻いて 足掻いて 足掻いて 醜いも掴み取れ それがお前の夢なら

Struggle Struggle Struggle No matter how unsightly, grasp it if that is your dream

世界を変えてゆけ

着いた　吐いた　ツイッター呟く 7個目の方で ATP上手に受け渡す日々だけ

{Arrived at, told (a lie), twitter,}2 I mutter in direction of the seventh (word) Only days that I, good at promising, transfer

もう　勘が冴えて悔しいわ 無意識に運べたら楽だろうな 淡々と笑えないわ

取り繕ってしまうわ いつも　ゲラゲラ　道を塞ぐ民よ 感謝の言葉しか出てこないよ 後戻りは　しなくていいの 今のところは　帰って眠るだけ

It’s vexing having good intuition Carrying (something) unconsciously is easier, isn’t it I can’t laugh indifferently I’ll patch it up Always roaring with laughter people that block the way Only words of gratitude come out It’s alright not to backtrack For the time being I’ll go home and just sleep

おかしいと思うほど 頷いてしまう方法 顔に出すこと　許されなくて 泣き疲れてしまおう リセットを覚えよう 興味ないなら　ほっといてくれ

I think it’s really weird the way I bow my head in agreement Any facial expression not tolerable I’ll cry and get tired I’ll remember to reset If I’m not interested leave me alone

難関　難解　何階　間違う 笑えないジョーク 来週の献立を眺める日々だけ

{Barrier, unintelligible, which floor,}3 it’s wrong A joke you can’t laugh at Only days where I gaze at next week's program

もう　勘が冴えて悔しいわ 無意識に運べたら楽だろうな 淡々と笑えないわ 取り繕ってしまうわ いつも　ゲラゲラ　道を塞ぐ民よ 感謝の言葉しか出てこないよ 後戻りは　しなくていいの 今のところは　帰って眠るだけ

It’s vexing having good intuition Carrying (something) unconsciously is easier, isn’t it I can’t laugh indifferently I’ll patch it up Always roaring with laughter people that block the way Only words of gratitude come out It’s alright not to backtrack For the time being I’ll go home and just sleep

君がくれた毒苺 満たされてない君の一号を 食べてやる　絶対　忘れないように いつかの涙とか　不正解だとか 矛盾論理から 救えるように　なるまで

The mock strawberry you gave me -- the unsatisfied you’s {number one}4 I’ll eat it so that I definitely won’t forget Things like someday’s tears or the incorrectnesses they’re contradictory logic, so until i can be saved...

もう　勘が冴えて悔しいわ 無意識に運べたら楽だろうな 淡々と笑えないわ 取り繕ってしまうわ いつも　ゲラゲラゲラ 道を塞ぐ民よ 感謝の言葉しか出てこないよ 後戻りは　しなくていいの 今のところは　帰って眠るだけ

It’s vexing having good intuition Carrying (something) unconsciously is easier, isn’t it I can’t laugh indifferently I’ll patch it up Always roaring and roaring with laughter people that block the way Only words of gratitude come out It’s alright not to backtrack For the time being I’ll go home and just sleep

知られたくは　ないけど 知ってほしいよ　なんて言えたら 勘が冴えちゃう日は　叫んでしまう いえい　いえい　いえい　イエイ 誰もいない遠くで　面と向かって 遺影　遺詠　遺影　遺詠 遺影　遺詠　遺影　死体

I didn’t want it to be known, but I wanted you to know; as if I could say that The day when my intuition gets good I’ll shout Yay yay yay yay Far away where there is no one, face to face Yay yay yay yay {Portrait of deceased, posthumous song, portrait of deceased, posthumous song}5 I want to yay yay yay {Portrait of deceased, posthumous song, portrait of deceased, dead body}5

_____ _____ _____ _____ _____ 

There are a few plays on kanji and their pronunciation in the song, which I marked with curly brackets: