I'm sorry if you don't want these types of questions on your blog anymore but I saw you touched that topic a few times. my friends are mostly into the hookup culture and when I opened about my values and sexual boundaries (only wanting to sleep with someone i trust and have intimacy with outside of bed with prospects of something long term, ideally one person) they said sex is not as serious as I make it up to be, it's not this deep almost spiritual thing I made it out to be in my head but physical and fun and something to chase, its because i internalised religious puritanical thinking and if it wasn't for this I would think so differenly. what hit me most is when they told me I'll regret not having fun in my youth when I'm older and now I'm really conflicted if it's really where it's coming from. I am all for respecting one's sexual boundaries and I stand by what you said 100% but I started to question the origins of mine. I'm not religious and I don't think I'm repressed sexually but I did grow up in a mostly Christian country. but then so did they. do you think this is the only reason people don't want to sleep around? internalising religious puritanical line of thinking? now it feels like they are not mine and informed by my way of seeing intimacy but something to deconstruct in order to not be serious and stuck up about sex. to sum it up somehow ever since I heard that I don't feel as good about my values as I did before ): thank you if you answer
The first thing I'm noticing is that the phrasing of your last sentence is fairly specific, "I don't feel as good about my values". I understand that it could just be a figure of speech, but to me it comes off as you being more preoccupied with the morality of your outlook and not how said outlook makes you feel, which could be preventing you from understanding your boundaries better in itself. It isn't morally wrong to want to consider every possible perspective (even if you believe that some of those perspectives are overzealous) or have a cautious approach towards sex because it is an inherently hazardous activity with plenty of pitfalls.
In my opinion, sex really is that serious, especially for women, given that it has the capacity to result in a pregnancy or STD and those are not exactly the states you want to be flippant and irresponsible about. Even if we disregard religious conditioning and the bonding element of sex, it seems quite strange to suggest that sex is just a fun and frivolous activity that doesn't require a thorough examination precisely because of its medical implications. I grew up in a secular environment and still ended up developing an attitude that is closer to the one you describe in the first part of your message, so you are right for pointing out that religious upbringing is not the common denominator here.
Regarding your fear of missing out on things, I, frankly, think that it is quite unfounded because there is no shortage of sexual opportunities for women regardless of age group and sexual orientation; I suspect that your friends expect themselves to marry and become mothers in the future and want to make sure that they properly indulge in promiscuity before this sort of lifestyle becomes difficult to access for them, which is why I, personally, wouldn't take their hastiness to heart. I'll be entering my late twenties soon and I absolutely do not regret my decision to not sleep around in my youth, primarily because I didn't quite understand what my boundaries were at the time; I'm glad it was the kind of decision I made, if anything.
I cannot in good faith suggest for you to "try out things for yourself" to see where you stand on things because engaging in sexual relations without knowing where your boundaries lie (and it is very much the case for yourself, otherwise you wouldn't be expressing your confusion) is always a recipe for disaster and the fastest way to accumulate more psychological trauma; I can only share my personal experience (rather, lack thereof) with casual sex and ask for you to take it into account. I wonder if engaging with fiction or writing your own fictional stories would help you understand yourself better because, from the psychological perspective, our minds react to fictional scenarios with a similar degree or emotional authenticity and it is very likely that any repulsion or disgust would quickly signal to you that your response would be even worse if these fictional scenarios were to occur in real life. It was what I did back when I was still trying to navigate my psychological state and can attest that it works.