★Ife★

1. Eli Wei Chen- Sunborn

Starting off STRONG 😮‍💨😮‍💨

My first introduction to this man was that one CG of him leaning against a railing, and the first thing I noticed besides that beautiful FACE of his were his tantalising, rotund, perfectly curved boobs screaming to be let out of that damn compression shirt he got on. Is this also a safe space to say that I like going boob for boob with my Love Interests?

AND HE’S MELANATED YES HOLY FADAAAAA 🥹🥹🥹. Who told the devs I’d go to war for melanated men??? ANYTHING ranging from tanned to darkskin I’m UP or rather a PART of me goes up, teehee 😙. Not only that, he’s got HAIRUHHHH 😩😩😩. Means I can grab a clump and pull on that shit-

I promise I’m done now 💀

See, I wasn't even going to play Sunborn until his sexy ass showed up. Now, I’m like “Hmm, werewolves and shit. Interesting. My coochie hairy asf so I'm practically part werewolf. Is you looking for an Omega? Perhaps you can enlighten me about heat cycles. Oh, and about knotting—”

I haven't even read the book yet, but ELI??? He’s sumn SERIOUSSSS. When I finally get to it, y'all would be SICK of me 💀

2. Ram Doobay- Kali: Flame of Samsara

JEEESUSSSSUHHHH 😩

I don’t read the Kali series but gah DAMN, this man is FOINE. I’m so conflicted because he looks good with and without his eye patch. Does it stay on or off when I crack him? Hardest decision of my life 💔💔💔

For sure, if I read Flame of Samsara, FUCK the Basus, FUCK everyone in that bitch too, this man WILL be my Love Interest. No one else would be able to turn my head. Even if he’s some kind of heinous criminal in the book, imma still stick beside him. Do I sound like a bird to you? Possibly, but it takes one to know one, boo. Mhm…🌚🌚🌚

If you know anyone that looks like Ram irl, make sure to hit your girl up. I’m single as a Pringle and ready asf to mingle 😙

3. Shen Zheng- W: Time Catcher

MY FIRST EVER LOVE INTEREST OMGMGMGMGMG

I knew this was gon’ be my man when I saw his sexy ass in that prison cell, looking like hell, beaten to a pulp, LONG ASS HAIR(you can probably guess I like long hair in men. In black men, it’s a big, voluminous AFRO), runes all over his body. Phew 😮‍💨. Shit, I can add another rune on his body with my HANDS 🫦

This man makes you WORK for his penis, holy shit. It took a MINUTE for me to get into this man’s drawls. Shit was so bad that after their first kiss, I not only screamed until my voice went hoarse, I was worried he’d ghost her after 😭

It's okay though because I’m also a friends-to-lovers slow burner too so Shen and I are basically the same person. If anything, it adds more depth to Shen’s backstory and the relationship he has with Nova which I LOVE. Plus, when that penis was GOT, imagine my surprise when I saw that Shen is also a FREAK and a beautiful SUB.

I said “JACKPOT! 🤑🤑☝️🏾☝️🏾”

I love my grumpy Chinese man sm

4. Ratan Vaish- Kali: Call of Darkness

Now, the authors played for whitewashing him 💀

Literally the first thing I said when I saw him for the first time was “Oh, he’s white as shit”. I swear to god I'm deadass.

I’ve met and seen a few South Asians in my life and almost(keyword ALMOST) all of them had brown skin or were darkskinned like me. Still, he’s utterly GORGEOUS and has BEAUTIFUL LONG HAIRRRRRRUHHHH

He also looks so gentle. Tell me he is guys 🥹. I didn't get past the first eps of Call of Darkness because seeing Killian told me all I needed to know how the story would play out and I couldn't play it seeing such similarities the book’s plot had to how my own culture and its practices became demonised or seen as bad. Trust me, I know how it feels. It felt so disrespectful to play the series

Anyway, yeah. Love tf outta Ratan and the authors will PAY

5. Felonia- Astrea’s Broken Heart

Big Mama FELLLLLL 😮‍💨

She loves herself a smoky eyeliner and it looks so CUNT on her. I love gworls that know what their best features are 😛. I just felt COMPELLED to say, Mother. How can I NOT 😩? This woman? TAKING it henniiii

Her character shook the fandom so hard. She got these hoes SMOKING out of their ears for doing things they’d prolly praise Malek and Mikael for. Everyone chants that we need more morally grey women rep in RC but in the same breath, you niggas pay them dust or be borderline misogynistic towards them. You don’t want it ENOUGH 😡🫵🏾

Felonia is the realest and the baddest and you don't get her unless you’re as much of a bad bitch as her. Couldn't be me tho. I got her first look. Keep tf up ✌️🏾

6. Saraswati Basu- Kali: Flame of Samsara

The Basus, I've heard are LOTS of things.

But UGLY? Never that. Nuh-uh 🤏🏾.

I remember seeing Sara for the first time. I had to DOUBLE TAKE because whewwwww 😮‍💨.

And her eyes are such a beautiful green. I get so entranced staring into them. Shit be hypnotising me. I need to control it bro 💀

I just LOVE a good mug

7. Madame Park- Garden of Eden

More like Mommy Park OUUU SHITTTTT 😩

I love a lil’ red lip and SHE??? TAKING ITTTTT!!! Just like Sunmi did(Man, I miss her sm. I was THEE biggest Sunmi and Chungha stan during lockdown 💔💔💔. I hate when people pay these K-pop Soloists dust💔💔💔)

Every shot of this woman I see in Garden of Eden, I’m barely reading her dialogue and just cussing the fuck out of the SIRENS because their manager is so damn HAWT. Lucky bastards. SHOULD HAVE BEEN MEEEEE 💔💔💔

And it's a good thing she looks so much like Sunmi because if I can’t go see her irl(bc I'm BROKE) then I’ll settle for gawking at Miss Park over dere. It's a win-win situation!

8. Ava Wong- Soulless

MY LOVELYYYYY 🥹

Let me tell you rn. I don't PLAYYYY about Miss Ava Wong. I sobbed for this woman so hard I got a splintering headache. I know what it feels like to be so insecure and not being able to move on from the past.

Man, if I could, I’d tell her over and over again just how beautiful she is. With makeup, without makeup, with her scars and prosthetic leg, without her scars and prosthetic leg. I’m a real psycho crazy bitch about her. Like I go DUMB. Tread cautiously when addressing my good sis or you’ll be popped like it's the fourth of July 💥💥💥💥

I love her to death. She’s my girl fr

9. Doo-yeong- Garden of Eden

No because guys I think I like him TOO much 💀

Mind you, I’ve only played three episodes of Garden of Eden thus far, but I'm already folding for this nigga. IT’S THE DIMPLES. IT’S THE FUCKING DIMPLESSSSS. One of you niggas has placed cameras in my room and are feeding the footage back to the devs so that they PERFECTLY construct Love Interests that are my type physically. There’s no fucking way dude.

At least make an edit of me and send it since your nosy ass likes recording me 🙄

He looks so cuuute and the scene of him watching the stars with Luna was so fucking cute too. My yearner senses are tingling and they’re NEVA wrong. This one, I can feel it in my coochie. I NEED to see his fine ass again. I’m having WITHDRAWALS bro

And he’s an actor too, oh myyy 🫦. I’ve got a movie we can make together—

10. Dean- Garden of Eden

I’m scared because he looks like he could ruin my life 😨

I’m also intrigued because he looks like he could ruin my life…🫦

Is it just me who thinks he looks alt? Or maybe ole girl down there saw his piercings and the way his hair is styled, and it took control of my rationale. Any alt men reading this? My DMs are OPEN 😛

And the CHOKEERR 😩. How about we substitute that shit with my hands aha 😛

My only problem thus far is that I think he’s nonchalant and I HATE nonchalant men 😭😭😭. Not only that, he looks TOXIC(As per, he’d ruin my life) Maybe it's because in Season 1 he leans more heavily into being a side character and you actually start romancing him in Season 2.

If that's the case, you’re going to have to watch this space, people. Between Doo-yeong and Dean? It’s gon’ be MESSYYYYY

11. Ozar- And The Haze Will Take Us

I hate when fine niggas are whores 💔💔💔

Ozar is the TEXTBOOK definition of sexy. Like ole girl down there was YOWLING when his fine ass sprite popped up on my screen. AND HE HAS LONG HAIRUHHHHH I’M ABOUT TO STROKE MY SHITTTTTT 😩😩😩. You guys are LUCKY that I hadn't thought to start posting on Tumblr during the time I was playing ATHWTU. You would have had to BLOCK me from how disgustingly vile and down bad I was for this whore 💀. Have you lot not SEEN that one scene when he had wet hair??? Lord JESUS its a fire 😮‍💨😮‍💨

I was ON Ozar like gum on a shoe. And in ways that was concerning to feminism. I genuinely needed to touch grass because it was THAT bad. You can already guess that my shit went dry IMMEDIATELY he was posted up with them other girls.

However, when I saw that one of them was a gorgeous black woman with an AFRO no less, I was like “Oh, nvm. He got it. You can keep whoring. That ain’t my nigga no more but I sure hope he’s yours my Nubian sista”. You know what Ozzy and the Cockroaches? Fairs👌🏾

12. Novak- And The Haze Will Take Us

I’ll protect you from these jealous cretins, dada 🫦

When you’re so tea that everyone around you becomes your opp. The village was HATINGGGG on my mans bro.

Mind you, the way he emerged from the Haze has to be one of the HARDEST entrances I’ve ever seen in a RC book. Everyone’s calling him demonic, meanwhile my pussy’s spread WIDE open hoping to collect all that damn aura. One man’s trash is another overly freaked-out girl’s juicy steak and buttery lobster. Don’t play with my nigga now.

And he’s so MUSCULARRRR like chilll I'm easyyyyy and he’s nonchalant to everyone but pathetic towards Lada. THESE MEN CANNOT COMPETEEE 💔💔💔

My eggs are ready to be fertilised 😙

13. Sirin- And The Haze Will Take Us

So like I love women that aren’t problematic but are labelled as such because they’re surrounded by niggas that use their brains to walk on hot charcoal

I don’t care what ANY of you say about this version of her too. It was a no-brainer decision for me when it came down to picking which one to not shut up about for the entire time I played the book. This version deserves as much recognition as the other one because, either way, the one thing Sirin is gonna do is serve face at the end of the day. FAWK the noise.

14. Xander Van Hayes- Advent No 3

I will beat the ever-loving FUCK outta this man because I hate his ass. However, I’m also not blind 🙄

I’m even ashamed to say that if not for my first introduction to his character being him abusing the daylights out of Raina, I WOULD have romanced him.

And the gag?

I dislike The Chancellor more than his bitchass

Wait, I feel sickuh….I feel like I’m gonna vomit…I feel vomity…🤢🤢🤢

The end is near. Admitting that genuinely reduced my lifespan by 50 years. I might even die tomorrow. Keep me in your prayers, my lovelies 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

There’s people out there in the fandom that think that Xander is WHITE oml 💀💔. You can’t sit there and not tell me that this man doesn't look Middle Eastern at MOST or mixed at LEAST. His surname being Van Hayes doesn’t fool me. Anton, you’re not slick. I’ve got your tea. My eyes are on you mf

15. Van- Heaven’s Secret: Requiem

Everytime I look at this man, I think about how Lane bitch slapped him in Requiem and I start shittting myself laughing 💀

Even in HS3, he still has the mark on his face from it. Like I’m WEAK. He don’t fuck with her at ALL 😭. I wonder if he still flinches anytime Lane gets too close to him 💀

Regardless, this man is SEXYYYYY. Genuinely, the side characters in Requiem are my fav. It’s REALLL muggy ‘round here. Everyone can get it. From ME especially 🫦🫦🫦

16. Sonya- Heaven’s Secret Requiem

SONYAAAAA 🥹🥹🥹

She’s my FAVVV HSR side character. The serotonin boost I get when she shows up on my screen is ASTOUNDING. All of a sudden, I can’t stop smiling and I'm kicking my feet. Mind you, I’m a stone-cold THUG. Even the most nonchalantest nigga on this earth gets annoyed by my nonchalance

Also real recognises real. She’s also a WRITER. It was so cute when she wrote that fairy tail for everyone to read. She’s such a sweetie 🥹.

Is she taking fanfic requests tho? I NEED a 60k-word fanfic of me and Greg on my desk by tomorrow. Preferably with the plot being the other uses Greg has for his muscles 😛

17. Emma- Waterlily

Not tew much on my sista now y'all. Be kind to her 🤨

I always see people call Emma annoying and I can see why(because overly clingy people make my brain breakdown because I register clinginess as being robbed of independence and I LOVE my me time BAD 💀. Plus, I hate when people touch me 💀) but GUYS. She’s my friend ☹️💔

Plus, I adore how protective she is over Riley. Who’s out there for MEEEE? Who’s gonna be protective over me like thatttt?? If onlyyyyy 👀👀👀👀

Come on, you guys can’t POSSIBLY be this dense 🙄

Also, can I just say, I LOVE her pink hair too. It makes her look ethereal. Can Xavier fight? One wrong move and imma swoop in and still his girl I’m just saying 😂✌️🏾

18. Ladora- Soulless

She’s so tea sometimes I forgot she’s bad to the mf BONE.

What she did to Willow and Vyx was terrible. But you can’t deny that you wouldn't go to war for that face too 👀. Exactly. Nod your mf head hoe 🌚

And peep how all throughout the battle, her makeup didn't move ONCE? I just had to say mother. I know she’s been using that L’Oreal setting spray. Yes lawd

Proud to say that I was very suspicious of her from the start regardless of her facecard. The fandom’s fading fr. KEEP UP MFS ✌️🏾

19. The Host- The One Vol 2

OUUUUU SHITTTT

They got to put a name on my girl. In the meantime, I’ll call her gorgeous 😙

(See what I did there guys? Hide your partners. My loose lips WILL have them took thangya 😛)

20. Avery Marks- 7 Brothers

They played making the FINER frats at Rosewood casual LIs 🙄

Avery and Logan? Dream threesome. So many niggas, so hard to pick one 🥲💔

I so wish that he was given more spotlight because surely you don't expect me to give my pussy up to TRISTAN??? The embodiment of the performative white woke liberal???? Edward Cullen’s cousin three times removed in his bootyhole??? PLEASE 💀. My nigga looks like how I feel everytime I remember I made my teacher read my smut back when I was in year 10. PALE as a ghost 💀. I still can’t believe I did that 😭

The poc in 7 Brothers were GORGEOUS 😮‍💨(yes, EVEN Jasper even though I don't find him attractive at all). And for a book that centred classism and achievements based on social capital rather than individual ability and attainment, I think it would have been a PERFECT poc centred book. A lot of them don't have the luxury of connections and with systemic racism in the mix, it’s even HARDER as individual ability is all they have. Imagine that in a PRIVATE UNIVERSITY. Do y'all see the vision? I hope I'm making sense

I get it was based on Langley’s experience, but even that wasn't well presented. The book was a heavy chop. And the fact it was the second book I read after the masterpiece that was W: Time Catcher?? Imagine my disappointment 💀

21. Maria Shu- Advent No 3

My bad.

DOCTOR Maria Shu 😛

Put some RESPECT on my gworl’s status. Thank you

Man, I missed seeing her and Adriana on my screen. There’s too much testosterone in this bitch. All I ever see now is Chancellor, Chancellor, Chancellor 🙄. That white man could be digging in my ass and I still wouldn't give a fuck. Can I see the women, Anton??? Can I see my sexy dark chocolate shyt Colonel Zane Carver??? Please??? I’m genuinely irritated

I haven't played this update for three reasons. Number one, I miss Mama Shu 💔💔💔. Number two, Anton played in my face because there’s no new romance advancements for Zane. Number three, if Raina fucks the Chancellor one more time, I’ll personally go out of my way to shove that fuckass mask of his where the sun don’t shine, and then take it a step further and shove it in places that the sun shines on but it’ll exacerbate the pain if it shines on ‘em. You get me?

Anyway, yeah. Love Maria to death and Anton does her so damn dirty. Mtchew 🙄

——————————————————————————

Give your thumb(or your index finger if you’re on a laptop) a lil’ kiss. This one was LENGTHYYYY. Be honest guys, you were disappointed the last list was over so soon.

Yes?

AWWWNNN YOU WANT MY ASS 🥹🥹🥹

Since I don't like owing people, consider my promise fulfilled. Matter of fact, from now on, if you have a list idea, feel free to pop it into my asks along with any other things you want me to comment on! All you need to do is suggest and I’ll do the rest(that was a BARRR 🔥🔥🔥).

Again, I hope you enjoyed this list, and to the people that are seeing this for the very first time, I hope you weren't too scandalised. I pride myself with having a way with words 😙

And as always, there will be a part 2 because there are too many characters that motivate to take up stretching classes so feel free to tell me characters that personally make you swoon. Until then next one.

1. Raphael- Astrea’s Broken Heart

Raise your hand if you knew already ✋🏾✋🏾✋🏾

Oh…everyone’s hands are up…😀

So you just called me a white man’s whore…☹️

Okay but fr, I can admit that I can’t shut the fuck up when it comes to Raphael and if you follow me or see my posts harassing your feed(I’m SO sorry 😭), you know this too. Like if I was asked to blow up the earth just to get a twitch of that angel dih ALL of you are dying in a heartbeat, all shade. I put that on Raph’s eyesight 💀✌️🏾

LIKE HOW CAN I NOTUHHH 😩????? This man is the full package. My EXACT type on paper. I’m as big of a bird for Raph as Vicky is for ALL of her LIs to some degree(But she’s MY bird. Don’t play with my sis ✌️🏾). I promise you, I can go on and on about the things I love about this man, but if I’m allowed to yap for too long, shit would look like a university dissertation and I care about you guys’ thumbs(give thumbelina a sweet lil’ kiss for me 😙)

And with how much I talk about him, it’s very funny because I didn't find him attractive in the SLIGHTEST when I played ABH for the first time 💀. I was stuck on Mikael’s ass like crusty shit. That man’s beauty was SICKENING. AND HE HAD LONG HAIR TOO IT’S TOO MUCH ICEEEE. When Raph started spitting that melancholy, I was like PAUSE, HE’S WELL REGULATED??? This might be my dream nigga. And that, kids, is how I met your daddy. The longest-lasting relationships always started with one person not being that attracted to the other initially. TRUST me guys.

Someone in the comments on one of my posts pointed out how every Raphael romancer was once a Mikael romancer at one point. There needs to be some kind of psychology behind that. All roads lead to the Astrea angel duo 💀

2. Declan- Waterlily

The term “spicy white” is a slur to me but this man is SPICYYYYY 😩

And it's not the kind of “spicy” or “seasoned” white man where he’s cosplaying a black person and being a wigga. Ew. Godforbid. I REBUKE it in the name of the lord 🙏🏾. Any that dares to look my way will spontaneously burst in flames. Nothing about me gives I’d like THAT when I could go date the real thing 💀. Be yourself people ✌️🏾

Like he’s spicy in the way that this man might be insane, a tsundere and will smirk in the middle of you taming him. Walk with me, this nigga is a FREAK. He has that DAWG in him that you don't see in the average white LI. He’s spicy in the way I wanna ruin his life and he’ll let me while he’s lowkey getting hot and bothered from it(GET YOUR PENS OUT AND WRITE THIS FOR ME. ON MY DESK IN SIX HOURS’ TIME)

And what’s funny was I was initially going to romance FABIAN 💀(See, with me, a love interest has to MARINATE) because I wasn't fucking with Declan’s…aesthetic iykwim. At first glance, he looks like a posh suburban rich boy from old money who grimaces at the sight of black people as if this is not the 21st century and his ancestors managed to find away to live vicariously through him 💀. MUSCLE MEMORY. He’s the type I AVOID irl 😭.

Glad I’m sorely mistaken and he just acts like a cocky bitch and Riley’s self-employed bodyguard because ouuu shit 👀👀👀. If I had my hands on him, I’d WORK his ass. Declan is somethin’ serious, I tell you 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

3. Walter- Soulless

The concept of a human-celestial-siren hybrid giving me cuteness aggression.

I don’t play about this one right here. NEVA!!! You will hear from me and you will never stop hearing from me if you cross him. I put that shit on YOUR life. And I was soooo indifferent to him when I started playing Soulless. To me, he was just there. From the moment he wanted to be Vyx’s friend he hadn’t stopped moving me since then. AND HE’S A CAT DAD??? I LOVE CATS?!!!! I LOVE HIM MORE 🥹🥹🥹

I knew I was gone the moment that he didn't wanna be friends with Vyx anymore after that meeting with Tiger forced his hand and I felt bad for HIM. WHY??? That siren voice of his may have also done a number on me too because there’s no way.

I love his friendship with Vyx so much too. She brings him excitement, he brings her peace. AWWWNNNN 🥹🥹🥹. This is really my familyyyyy. My heart is FULL guys.

Nothing in his head except the absolute need to be a cutie patootie.

4. Cain- Heaven’s Secret Requiem

Please, like he’s my friend.

Is Cain grey as fuck? Yes. Does he lowkey need to kill the squad and his brother for all they did to him in Requiem? Yes. Will I still hold it down for him despite the lashings he gets from the fandom? HELL YEAH. Like Felonia, he was adapting to his ever-changing circumstances.

This man is my best friend. He does no wrong in my eyes. Even if you come at me with HARD evidence, camera angles, ultra HD camera quality, a voice recording that tells you the EXACT words this man said verbatim as if you were there with him, sound so crisp he’s virtually ear-fucking you, imma say it’s AI. Deadass. Matter of fact, since you want to make shit up, lemme go ahead and empty this damn clip—💥💥💥💥

Yes, I’m VERY biased. I love Cain sooo so much and I don't even fuck with most of the angels in the Heaven’s Secret Universe. Pass the problems you have with him over to ME.

——————————————————————————

…That’s it..? Surely not…

As I said, I TRIED guys 💀. I’m Malcolm X typa pro-black. My HEAD hurts bro 😭💔💔💔

I’ll make it up to you guys VERY very soon with anotha list. Pinky promise🫰🏾. Cut my ass in half if I don't come through.

As always, feel free to share YOUR fav white characters(If you have any or any LEFT, that is 💀💔) and until the next list. MUAH

1. Ending of Soulless Season 1

Threxio and Xantheia. Both of you watch tf out.

And as I was reading it, it was the first day of my cycle, I had my pink Little Mermaid PJs on, I had one of my mom’s sweat-activating curly wigs on my head because I was detangling it and trying to make it look good as new earlier in the day(and to hide my pitiful mini twists because they looked like they wanted to undergo space exploration 🫩💔), I was fucking up 5 dark chocolate-covered Digestives, and it was a massive heatwave. Based on this description, does it look like I was built for this shit? Or built at all?

I was all in my feels empathising like HELL with Vyx, missing home along with her as an immigrant Nigerian living in the UK and that fucking incubus that I hate had to do some bullshit. I WILL BREAK. HIS. FUCKING. FACE💥💥💥💥

Worse, I had SOME faith in Threxio. I didn't expect him to go that low despite how much I hate the nigga’s guts??? And he had the NERVE to fix those thin ass lips of his to say some bullshit like “I’m doing this for your own good. Demons aren't supposed to have sentiments”. I will leave a long-lasting sentiment on your face in the shape of my handprint, you horny bitch.

The TEARS that were shed for Vyxaria oml. I love her so so much. That’s my irl homegirl. And just when I thought she could still make lemonade out of ruined lemons, Xantheia snuck up and squeezed them into my eyes. YOU WILL PAY. THEY BOTH WILL PAY

2. Audrey’s death in Astrea’s Broken Heart

Oh, I'm not hungry

I was so naive that I genuinely saw a happy ending for the book during the last parts of Season 3. Or maybe it was because I had just cracked Raphael and it went to my head and I stopped retaining the book’s lore 💀

And I was genuinely starting to fuck with Somnus too. Inviting him to cookouts and shit 💔. Another reminder to NEVER trust men. And the dialogue Audrey had before she finally passed??? ELENA MAKE IT STOP PLEASEEEE!!!! I’M NOT YOUR STRONGEST READER 💔💔💔

And the aftermath, whew shit. Raph having just lost his sight and then the focus on his infinite darkness now shifts to the drop in temp as they are transported to Snowy Valley. He scans everyone’s energies and doesn't feel the one of the woman he finds easiest to memorise, same as it was easy to love her. I’M SICK(Yes, I used to publish Wattpad books in my youth. You want a full scene, innit 😛)

I love Audrey so much, man.

3. Eleonor going batshit crazy and Liren attempting to calm her down

Look at Liren’s smile omgggg 🥹

El’s backstory was the only one that moved me as a Rael romancer sorry

I was in my FEELS during that scene where she ingested a mix of Rael and Liren’s blood and she almost attempted. And then her backstory in between with her and the boy she adopted. “Mother…” I sobbed 🫩

And Liren empathising with her struggle and suffering another injury to subdue El?? I cried into my lunch. Anastasia, you will feel it for that a-man-will-fix-her, inherently misogynistic towards lesbians trope you’ve given El. If I could feel that much buzz as an aromantic heterosexual(non-passing to my peers apparently. Everyone thinks I'm either bisexual or lesbian 😭) taking her platonic route, what went down in the romantic rendition of this scene???

4. Astrea’s death

Man I feel too much sometimes…

Unpopular opinion, I LOVE Astrea. I genuinely didn't understand why a lot of the fandom hates her. Honestly, I get it and she conceived the LITERAL spawn of a powerful demon but c'mon she’s my friend guys ☹️

Maybe it's because I empathise with her backstory. Imagine having such love to someone that you want to share everything with them, even the scars on your back. And after you show them, their first instinct is to stab you in those very places you revealed to them. Should Astrea have revealed herself to the humans that she was a firstborn angel? No. But do I fault her for it? Also no. To me, how the humans treated her afterwards will NEVER be her fault.

Her death broke my heart but I was so happy to finally see her stop suffering and living with that guilt, even as the death Malek granted her was very merciful. I want to give Astrea the biggest hug

Please be kind to her guys. For me? ☹️

5. Felonia going to see her family

And after putting belt to ass on Somnus too. I just HAD to stan. Even Furius calls her daddy

You guys can’t even COMPREHEND the tears I shed for Fel when she went to visit her fam. The niggas in heaven genuinely ain't shit. How do you promise her the safety of her family and the assurance she won't face the gallows if she helps you subdue the beast and then turn around and put her family’s wings on sticks like kebabs outside their home and send them down to earth where they lose their memory(her dad has PTSD and he doesn't even know WHY. That is sick) and they all eventually went their separate ways, making it harder for Fel to track them down???? I was HOT

And my dumbass on my first play snitched on her to Mikael. I swear on my first play I was operating like Patrick Star. I’ve never wanted time travel to be a thing so bad. I’m so glad Fel never held it against Audrey because I would have 💀

6. Shen rejecting Nova after he found out she betrayed the group

When he told her to go away, I genuinely broke down. Swear on my life

Imagine this being the first ever book I read when I joined the app last year December, I'm still growing accustomed to the formula of Russian romance games as a girl that grew up on American ones(Choices, Episode, Tabou, etc. I should have been supervised lmao. I was playing EVERYTHING 💀), my dad came over for the holidays(since he works and lives in Nigeria while the rest of my nuclear fam live in the UK), my entire nuclear family is in the living room chatting and I'm in my room wasting my life away and ignoring everyone like the fat fucking chud I am because socialisation burns the black off my skin. When that scene came on, suddenly I felt the Christmas Spirit descend on me tenfold.

As a baby RC player at the time, I genuinely thought the relationship was DONE. I didn't touch it for 3 fucking days after. I needed to be sedated(And possibly checked into a hospital because of the extent of my crash out lmao 💀). See, I'd never do that to Shen and it was so much more devastating because that man makes a woman WORK for his penis and I did allat for nothing. NOVA WHYYYYYUHHHH. DO YOU WANT THIS SEXY TRAUMATISED CHINESE MAN OR NAH??? IF YES LOCK IN, IF NOT PASS THE BALL

8. Final Battle in W: Time Catcher

THIS CG HAD ME SO HYPED

DO YOU SEE HOW EVERYONE’S STANCED UP AROUND NOVA??? EVEN ONYX AND TALLIS LOOK HARD ASF IN THEIR ANIMAL FORMS. THIS WAS PRESSUREEEEE. The aura this CG exudes makes me shed tears. IT’S JUST SO PEAK 💔💔💔💔

If only this scene was animated. It NEEDED the ‘HONORABLE’ trend on TikTok. I would genuinely lose my mind. Perhaps cardiac arrest

I was also content with my outcome of this battle. I ended up on the Others ending with Shen still alive. The concept of me letting my nigga die. I didn't even know it was possible he could die during his battle with Petar Grigorov until I played the book a second time(because I was consistently on the low status path during my first playthrough. I didn't even know there were walkthroughs until MARCH of this year. I choke even in romance games 💀💔)

9. Sailen and Ashriel jumping Liren

Whew, those tears were ANGRY

Angry as fuck for Liren because she has to put her life in the hands of these bitchass men.

Ashriel was expected. Sailen however??? Lowkey my heart broke a lil. It's really like THAT? I thought we were cool bro 💔💔💔

And Ashriel had the NERVE to act as if Liren was overreacting??? She should have killed him with her anomaly. I will ALWAYS take Liren’s side when it comes to these men. I don’t care.

My heart shattered when she talked about how much she trusts them even against her better judgment. KILL ‘EM NOW. I GOT A HUNDRED THOUSAND

10. Heaven’s Secret in its fucking entirety

So well…oh well…mmm…

This book was pure ragebait.

I rue the day I took Sociology as one of my GCSEs and Social and Cultural Anthropology as one of my IB subjects. As much as these subjects contributed to making me woke and are one of the many reasons I officially became agnostic at the start of this year, they ruined a lot of media for me because I can’t not see things from sociological/anthropological perspectives now. ESPECIALLY Heaven’s Secret 🫩

A lot of the bullshit wouldn't have happened if SHEPHA DIDN’T EXIST!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS BITCH???? I HATE THIS NIGGA SO MUCH??? WHAT THE FUCK??!!

Shit was so bad that he and this fuckass book were ALSO another reason as to why I became agnostic 💀. At some point while I was reading, I genuinely checked out because rationalising everyone’s decisions was HELL.

My TL;DR after reading HS is: Shepha’s a bitch and the immortals love their oppressive system. That’s it 💀

11. Cain getting his wings ripped off by Abel in Heaven’s Secret: Requiem

Can I just say, if Abel has no haters, I’m dead as a chile

This scene specifically made me tweak out for Cain. I’ve said this before but he’s a particular male love interest that I don't romance but don’t play about(besides Walter in Soulless. HE’S SO CUTE 💔💔💔)

Genuinely. Don’t look at this man funny. Don’t cough near this man funny. Don’t BREATH near this man funny. I will punch you in yo shit. I’m a boy mom for Cain

The symbolism in this CG alone is gut-wrenching. I can never understand how Cain became somewhat cool with Abel after everything that has happened between them. He better than me. My mom always tells me not to carry my anger today into tomorrow and let things go because it's not good to have that type of shit sitting in your chest. Me? With the anger I have towards different people even years later, there won't be enough room in my chest. Shit will go all the way into my ass. Maybe then I’ll get a fat ass

12. Edmund comforting Ro in her cursed form

This reverse Beauty and the Beast plate. I’ll kill myself rn 🥹🥹🥹

This alone solidified my decision to tell Abraham to go fuck himself with a cheese grater and romance Edmund instead

There’s something so intimate in a person loving you despite seeing the full wrath of you at your worst and still being there. I’M SOO LONELYYYY. WHEN IS IT MY TURN 💔💔💔💔

I was moved. HEAVILY. Roxanne is me. I am Roxanne. I HATE how much I see myself in the MCs in these RC books 💀

I thought yearners like Edmund died within the last century. Now we have nice-guys-finish-last niggas and mfs that chant “male-loneliness epidemic” as if women are obligated to providing men with their company 💀

13. Ending of Te Amo Vol 2

No guys, you don't understand. My heart was full and warm at this ending. I LOVED Volume 2 sm.

It's so domestic. Just a couple of childhood friends meeting each other by VERY abnormal circumstances and revisiting the past. I’m a sucker for shit like this. I’m just a feeler you know 💔💔💔

I almost lost my shit when they went to see Liz in the hospital and she momentarily forgot her memory. I was about ready to roll on the floor the way Mama Ojo did in that one meme(SamSpedy reference. Tell me at least ONE of you caught it. If not, I might be the only Nigerian RC player out there 💔💔). I’m glad I passed the stat check because I would NOT be able to deal with all of them having to reintroduce themselves to Liz and tell recount their shenanigans again. Like this was MY book. I SOBBED 🥹🥹🥹

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Aaand that’s the list!

Again, some of these reasons might be too small for a person to cry over and that’s okay. I just have empathy for the stupidest of shit 💀. If I haven't included anything that made you personally feel strongly, it’s either it didn't bring out such a strong emotion in me or I haven't read the book yet or I lack context to understand.

And also, feel free to share what exactly made you feel a type of way when reading some of these books. I LOVE hearing from you guys sm 🥹. Don’t leave me drier than my coochie when I see Malek’s ugly ass. Until next time!

1. The Incubus that wanted to fuck Mikael

Girl the way I CACKLED. And Mikael’s face after was priceless. He was not fucking with it at ALL 😭

Shit, if he doesn't wanna play, he can pass the ball to ME.

I imagine Mikael gets this ALOT. How could he not?? That man is PRETTY. He was the first Astrean I wanted to romance because he was so pretty(And because I want to use his hair as my next blonde lace front wig install) What can I say? I love pretty men 🤷🏾‍♀️

Lowkey a flex that both men and women are down to fuck him. Type of greed the Bible talks about.

2. The Succubus wanting to touch Mikael's wings

What was her name again? Layla, I think. She was so shy too. I love her sm 😭😭😭

Mikael’s genuinely the exhausted parent among the Astreans with a VERY very irregulated nervous system. Everyone keeps testing him and he’s so OVER IT. It makes me giggle. He offed his brother and shit just has not been working out for him at ALL

The smile on the Succubus’s face when he caved was GORGEOUS. And the way she couldn't stop looking at the angel duo(Babe, I know my nigga Raph is fine asf but back tf up 🌚). See, he still has some humanity left in him

3. Malek's ugly ass emote when the sandworm appeared

I’m giggling as I attempt to fish out this screenshot from my camera roll. HE’S SO UGLY 💀💀💀

Even just a pixel of this image is enough to put me in a laughing fit 💀

Malek romancers, this ya man? He looks like the face I make when I’m trying to pass a spiky shit while I'm simultaneously watching TikToks on my toilet 😭. Just laughing through the pain I can’t BREATHE 😭😭😭

I know the skin around his face fizzled and popped as he tried to smile. WHO MAKES THIS EXPRESSION WHEN THEY SEE SOMETHING THAT COULD POTENTIALLY KILL YOU IM WEAK ASF 😭

See this would have given me the ick. Idk how y'all do it. I had to pause and laugh for about 5 minutes before I had the mind to continue the scene 💀. That’s that payback for him putting emphasis on Raph being blind when using him to spread ‘Malum propaganda. I said “Oh, I’m sure” 😛🤏🏾

4. Malbonte serving face while Abel was electrocuting him

OKAY FACEEEE 🤏🏾🤏🏾🤏🏾

Now THAT’S how you clear a bitch. Get bro a modelling gig STAT.

The Squad may have won the fight but Malbonte won the mog off. Even I was gagged, I fear

I might be the only one that giggled at the absurdity of this scene. Everyone on Reddit is stroking Malbonte’s dick because they think this is hot. I just CAN’T bro 😭. I might genuinely have ijbolitis 💀. It's hard to take this book seriously when it’s a walking mess already.

5. Siire tweaking out on the Astreans

He REALLY loves his siblings, innit? 💀

That brief moment when Malek took Audrey to The Pit while the Astreans fought the sandworm, I know he was about ready to fucking dissipate from RAGE. This smoke nigga dusts me 💀

And Cass saying that his ears were about ready to fall off? Siire RELAX bro. Jesus 😭

And the way it was revealed that that was what David had to do in exchange for resurrecting Audrey and taking the Astreans to Snowy Mountain??? I was GAGGED. You know what? I hear it.

6. Hunger and Vicky fucking on Donnie's bed while he’s been held captive by the Squad

I’ve already made a post about this but I cannot get over how CRAZY this shit is 💀

And then have the nerve to ask him if he can get her pregnant after. Baby, with the amount of NUT that’s probably been projectiled onto Donnie’s bed, you’ll have no problem. Matter of fact, since his sheets are already fucked, might as well spread your spoochie onnat bed too 💀. WHY are you thinking about children at a time like THIS??? Do they not have clinics up in heaven????

Dino might die because of his own stupidity, Eragon’s being a bitch as per usual, you haven't seen Donnie in a while and you went to his room searching for answers. Given the circumstances HOW are you still able to get horny???? And you couldn't even WAIT until after you left the nigga’s room??? 💀

You can have sex ANYWHERE else. The hallway, the kitchen, Eragon’s fucking office. Maybe in front of Eragon himself since he wants to be a cuck and meddle in everyone’s business. I promise he won't mind. Still, you take your ass to get your back blown out in MY room?? MY SPACE?? MY SCENT??? WHERE’S THE RESPECT??? It’s too much 😭

I couldn't stop laughing because of the absurdity. In what world did Alice think Hunger romancers would ENJOY this(and if you did, then baby you’ve outfreaked me 💀. How is that possible????)? Why do I have to get pink eye because your man nutted on my pillow???? I’m so immature 😭😭😭

7. Yan unintentionally becoming a daddy to Kira

Kira was just being plain temperamental and standoffish and Yan was chill asf just watching her as if she was talking to a wall. Literally that one Lion and Monkey meme 😭. It was so stinkin’ CUTE.

And it's the way Kira got sad because she wanted to see Yan again when the Squad were going to meet Eragon. I said, “yep, that’s his daughter now”. And he didn't even have to do much either. He onnat nonchalant shit. I see you Yannnnn 😛🤞🏾. Could neva work on me tho. Y'all stay safe.

Bro already has a crow, an Abomination and now a half-breed teenage immortal girl.

Father of the Year fr

8. Donnie being a cute tsundere to the Squad while he was captured

He was giving all those Wattpad books where Y/N gets captured by the mafia boss 💀.

“Hmph! I’m not eating anything from you! It's probably poisoned!” He whined, shaking his head in disgust as Lane offered him food to eat before his fatass eventually caved as he realised he wasn’t built for this shit. I said, “Oh, 2019 Wattpad was on the moodboard, wasn't it?” 💀

Obviously, I understand why he was that way. It was just funny asf to witness 😭

9. Donnie's reaction when the Order didn't wanna fuck with him no more

Noooo I felt so bad for him but the way he instantly checked out and accepted his new situation threw me 💀

I know he cried into that bowl Donovan offered him. Bless his sweet lil heart 😭❤️

There was even nothing to go back to honestly. Imagine him finding out that Hunger and Vicky had sex in his bed. Matter of fact, chilling with the Squad ain’t half bad. Let me embrace the Stockholm syndrome

10. The Eragon vs Donovan standoff

This was when I knew that the book was well and truly COOKED 💀

It was giving those Gacha Life angel vs devil videos. “Don’t mess with my gang or you’ll be VERY sorry 😡💥🫵🏾”. One of your readers is THE most immature person you’ll ever meet who needs their lips(BOTH lips aha 😛) gorilla glued shut. PLEASE don’t play rn 💀

And it's the fact that there are some readers that thought this scene had phonetics and prose that rivals Shakespeare. GUYS. My fifth grade self could have easily written this 💀

The fact that Dmitry was able to somehow turn Malbonte loose when he’s the TIGHTEST immortal in that bitch was crazy too. Since when had the power dynamics shifted???

I genuinely just had to laugh. The only thing I COULD do 💀

11. The jumpscare of the voice over of the Love Interests in the middle of them stroking the MCs kitty cats

I’m so happy that I was unfortunate enough to hear the voice-over with Hunger while he and Vicky were FUCKING ON DONNIE’S BED(No, I won’t shut up about it) and not when Raph mistook my kitty cat for that damn harp. I fear I would have gotten the biggest ick and I can't lose my status as the Big Sister General of the Raphael fan club 🤞🏾

When I tell you, my entire body SHRIVELLED up like a prune. The Hunger voice sounded like a BURP. Worse, my mom was nearby(yes, I’m that brave. Being Nigerian conditions you to cultivate skills in maintaining composure while doing some stupid shit in front of your parents 🫡) so I had to TRY and act normal 😭. I went into my settings and turned that shit off IMMEDIATELY. Didn’t turn it back on until after I cracked Raphael.

WHO among the RC club team suggested this? Better question is anyone on the team under the age of 21??? I know the babes that listen to boyfriend ASMR were feeling weak in the knees hearing the voices. HELL NO

12. The Astreans' reactions to having to dress like whores

All their fits were tea too. Felonia’s ESPECIALLY. Whew 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨. Audrey really is the princess of the group. They’ll tolerate the most absurd request as long as its from her 😭

Cassiel’s grumbling was my fav 😭. Now you know you look good asf. Stop pretending you don’t like it 🙄. I’m also very certain that David checked himself out in the mirror before coming back out. And he shook his ahh to see if it moved like jelly in his whore fit. He KNEW he ate the house DEOWN

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And that's it! Feel free to share other moments in this update(or any other parts of the book) that made you lol more than it made you serious. Until next time.

1. Malbonte- Heaven’s Secret Universe

This man would NOT be a good father, please 💀

This man TWITCHES at the mere mention of Shephamalum. Worse, bro’s still licking Malbonte’s earlobe to coax him into joining his side again. And let’s not forget the HUNDREDS of years of torture he underwent because of ‘Malum. Straight WWE finishing moves on adolescent Malbonte. “🤬🤬🤬💥💥” on his ass.

He doesn't need a child, he needs a THERAPIST 😭

He’d be the most emotionally unavailable dad ever. And I imagine he’d be HELLA uncomfy with kids because they present emotions that were skinned out of him from a young age, and since he wasn't given appropriate comfort to combat them, he’d have NO idea how to manage those emotions in a child. And this nigga doesn't even speak half the time so the only comfort they’ll get is Malbonte’s fuckass smoulder and ellipses combo 💀

It might take him a hundred more years for him to unlearn all that hatred that ‘Malum conditioned him to have. So yeah, as long as the happenings of HS3 continue, Vicky needs to take it up her butt for now 💀

2. Ozar- And The Haze Will Take Us

Girl, this is a cheating ass baby daddy. I’m so mad because he’s so FINE

Anything female and human, Ozar’s OVERLY going bro. This man is a WHORE 💀. Season 1 Ozar was on somethin’ ridiculous.

His evil Dominican counterpart is literally Sincere from Love Island USA Season 8. How did it take two girls touching up on you, stroking more than your ego to realise you liked Lada???? Utterly TRIFLING. That’s what he is.

Before y'all crucify me, yes, I am aware that he changes when you lock in with him in ATHWTU, but with that logic, if I’m notorious for cutting men’s dicks and then I find a man I really like to the point I don't consider cutting his off, does that take away my past history of cutting men’s dicks? Exactly(Your answer better be no 🌚)

He’ll be a good dad, but a shitty partner, methinks.

3. Shepha- Heaven’s Secret Universe

He doesn't have kids. He has VICTIMS 💀

The first-born angels, Lucifer(the very first angel Shepha created), Malbonte, RAPHAEL, LITERALLY ANY ANGEL THAT IS UNFORTUNATE TO BE IN HIS LINE OF SITE.

This nigga wins the deadbeat dad of the year award by a LANDSLIDE. How are every single one of your creations just depressed and have some kind of PTSD??? And the way everyone’s somewhat happier after he died 😭. All the people asked of you is to do your mf job as the literal embodiment of light. DO YOUR FUCKING JOB???

4. Shephamalum- Heaven’s Secret Universe

Ou…

The concept of ANYONE conceiving the god of darkness’s children 💀

He gon’ beat my children up the way he did Malbonte and Audrey. My pussy lips are clenching just thinking about it 😭

5. Boris Romanov- Heaven’s Secret Universe

Could you imagine?

This man knocked you tf up and then just dies and becomes a phantom daddy 💀💔. Not only that, you’re the only one who can kind of see him(and can somehow fuck him still???) and you have to convince your kids that he’s more than just a memory. That psych ward is calling your name, henniiiii

I don’t know how Boris romancers do it. Honestly, respect to y'all 🫡🫡🫡🫡. Loving is letting tf go and bro’s BEEN gone. That man can’t parent from hell, now can he?

Man said: 🫥✌️🏻

6. Threxio- Soulless

(Picture quality of an 8-bit indie horror game. I’m so sorry y'all 💀🙏🏾)

He’s the type of nigga that’ll say “Imma get you pregnant” and think that coochie is DRIPPING. Does he know? 💀

And I'm CERTAIN that the concept of contraception is foreign to him. Baby, you’ll be having one kid a year until you reach menopause. Do you REALLY think I’d want more of his DNA around me? SAFE GUARD YOUR WOMB FROM THIS MAN

I just KNOW he has multiple baby mamas too. There’s NO advantage to being with this man. Just salt, vinegar and everything sinister with him 💀

I fear even him looking at me for too long will get my ass pregnant. This man just wants to fuck SOMETHING. I’m scared 😭😭😭

If you’re a Threxio romancer, you better have your house near a clinic. You’re going to be a regular customer 💀

7. Astaroth- Heaven’s Secret Universe

You couldn't PAY me to make the conscious decision of fucking this man and giving birth to his child despite the possibility that the baby will look just like him and that child will be the string that keeps me bound to this man for the rest of my life while he has a fine ass twin brother that I’d push out a basketball team for with no question even if my reward after was a dirty ass Krabby Patty with mystery meat in it that was used to clean the barnacles off of Mr Krabs’ asshole 💀

Don’t play.

8. Abraham- Shakespeare’s Code

Baby, he has a whip…

And he’s a witch hunter.

And I’m black.

And that means our children will be half-black

AND we’re in the SHAKESPEAREAN ERA????

…

Yeah, ‘nuff said 💀

9. Odin- The Missing

HELL NAH

This man is SCARY. I haven’t played his romance path and I don't plan to. Ever.

This man is the literal embodiment of the word sinister. And in every picture I've seen of him he’s doing some crazy shit or is holding a knife. Will I be safe with him as my baby daddy???? 😭

He look like he’ll gut me in the throat if I ask him to change the baby’s diaper in the softest tone possible. I’ve watched TOO many Tyler Perry films(especially the Madea franchise. Stereotypical but hood classics nonetheless🤞🏾) and he’s literally how Perry depicts the abusers in his storylines oml 🫩💔. I will NOT be another statistic. Thank you and good fucking night.

10. Set- Song of The Crimson Nile

So my kids can inherit that strong ass chin and jaw of his? You must have lost your damn mind. His face is LITERALLY shaped like an inverted triangle 💀

Anubis is his literal nephew and look how he treats bro. Do NOT give this man the privilege of a child calling him “dada” PLEASE.

You looked at this man choke out Eva just because he thought in his head that he would defy her and you think to yourself “Oh yeah, my eggs want to be fertilised 😩”???

…😨

Is there a particular AO3 tag you fancy? I won’t judge. I swear on YOUR life.

11. Malek- Heaven’s Secret Universe

“He’s one of the weird grown-ups”- Klee about Diluc, Genshin Impact

(He looks so fugly in this screenshot I took of him while playing the HS3 update. I burst out laughing 😭. I’m even laughing as I type this 😭. This update was pure GOLD for my immature ahh 💀)

The immortal children of Somnus Island are canonically SCARED of this man. His aura is MALEVOLENT. Imagine having to explain the Abaddon shadow that looms over Malek to your 3-year-old in a way that won’t make their heart stop. Even looking at his ugly ass face makes me want to kill myself.

Not only that, this man’s daddy is Baal. That makes him my FATHER-IN-LAW. Literally death or ultra death 💀. I’m fried no matter what. It really be the dad’s side of the family 💀

12. Ashriel- Averris: The Riftborn

This man is psychologically FUCKED and I’m really really keen on breaking generational curses/traumas. It ends with ME ✊🏾. Can I get an amen, people? 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

And this man has a big issue with people having autonomy. Best believe you’re not going to put my child in a cage just because they threw a lil’ tantrum. You have me UTTERLY fucked up, white man.

Yeah, Alexa, go ahead and play Plan B by Megan Thee Stallion. STAT

13. Xander- Advent No 3

I’d sooner have a Titan squish me like a bug than give this man any impression that I’d EVER let that teeny weeny crispy shrimp tempura of his inside my divine feminine parts.

Fuck them kids and FUCK you too. Especially.

14. Literally anyone that has Doobay/Basu as their last name- Kali Series

Now I don’t play the Kali books, but I've heard horror stories about these two families from both those that read it and the romancers THEMSELVES.

The Terrible Trio 💀

Especially about Amrit and Doran.

See, I’m safe anyway because if I read the Kali books, my love interests will be Ratan and Ram(I HOPE. I haven't heard anything about him. Is he good the exception? 👀). Those two can have my babies ANY day 🫦

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Aaaaand that’s the list! Give your thumb a cute lil peck because it's the reason you made it to the end. Do it now 🤬🤬🤬

As always, feel free to add or take from this list and agree or disagree with me. We can even agree to disagree 🤷🏾‍♀️. And again, BIRTH BABIES FOR WHO YOU WANNA!!! THE ONLY PERSON IN CONTROL OF YOUR WOMB IS YOU AND YOU ALONE 🫵🏾