passenger seat scream machine

on today's episode of "it is summer at the shittiest rink in southern california my dudes" ...... the ice was literally unskatable in a patch in the middle and the refs were like lmao fuck no we're not doing this and left so our game got canceled 2 minutes before puck drop. but we were like come ON we're all here and dressed already so they were like "okay just put cones down and remember you can't sue us if you die" so we scrimmaged for an hour+ blasting music on the PA with the extra rule that anyone who sent a puck through The Cone Zone got ferociously booed. it was so fun honestly. i love u summer season i love u beer league i love u shithole rink i love u rink staff who dont get paid enough to care about lawsuits i love u refs with a sense of self preservation

my mom just texted me out of nowhere saying i should keep track of how many goals i score in beer league and start celebrating milestones like 10 or 100 so i sent her a screenshot of my main rink's official player profile that said i had scored 5 goals so i was halfway to 10!! (at least since they started using their new system) and she immediately said "the opesite [sic] goalie must be really stupid to have you score 5"