Kill the Art Illusions

please prioritize your own health and happiness even when it is inconvenient for others

“You’re a nerd” I say as I look at you with heart eyes while you info dump to me

grief is so crazy like what if i forget what her laugh sounds like. does she know i loved her. i miss her so much. i catch myself doing things she used to do. i wish i could call her. i miss her so much. i do a crossword puzzle. i cry while washing the dishes. does she know i loved her? my heart feels like a hummingbird. i miss her so much. what if i forget what her laugh sounds like. what if i forget.

i talked ab this feeling in therapy yday and my therapist asked me, “would it really be so bad if your memories changed? if they softened and faded or looked different over time? why does that frighten you so much?” and i said, “i don’t want the love to disappear.” and she looked at me for a long moment and then she said, “it won’t. it doesn’t work that way. even if the memories soften or change, it doesn’t mean the love does. that love keeps going backward in time, forever, because you love her still. all is not lost.” i just thought i would share that in case it resonated w anyone else too.

kind of weird how parts of your soul are left in various locations without any warning… like yes i’m always at the top of that hill, sitting at the bus stop, in the cool light of the Japanese restaurant, standing at the pier etc etc

It’s all corrupt girl

Stop warning me about mature content I'm literally an adult

where are my headphones I can’t see without my headphones

“i want shows with more women” deadloch “i want women who are complex and diverse” deadloch “i want women who are gross and weird” deadloch “i want women who are fucking gay” deadloch!!

"I want shows that will teach me totally new swear words" Deadloch!!!

The ADHD urge to not

To just not

I have several overdue assignments

(girl who is already extremely private) i think i need to Move In More Silence

Deadloch S2 team really said "by the end of our cop show everyone is gay and no one is a cop" and I think that's very sexy of them.