123 Pre T/E

BINDER ALTERNATIVES FOR A FLATTER CHEST

Dark shirts. Black shirts really flatten the chest. Avoid white or grey shirts.

Wear a compression sports bra.

Avoid cup bras. Cups are designed to make the breasts appear more shapely, fuller, and bigger. I know a lot of closeted trans guys don’t wear cup bras, but some parents won’t buy new bras if they’re “in perfectly good condition”. If that’s the case, claim you grew out of your cup bras, then ask your parents to take you shopping and pick out some sports bras instead. 

Layer two shirts on top of each other. One shirt a tighter shirt such as an undershirt, with a baggy shirt over it.

THE FLATTEST CHEST WITHOUT A BINDER

Get a compression sports bra and put it on. Then, put a tank top or undershirt over that. Then, over the tank top/undershirt, put on a black shirt, preferably one also baggy. Even better, a hoodie. Avoid light colored shirts or thinner materials if you’re aiming for a flat-chest look. Generally the darker and thicker the material, the better it flattens your chest. This is why black hoodies are popular with trans boys.

EXCUSES TO GET A BINDER IF YOU’RE CLOSETED

If you’re in theater, tell your parents you’re going to play as a male role, want to go all-in, and the binder would allow you to get into character better. 

Tell your parents you’re getting teased in school. I know a cis girl who was getting horribly teased by boys due to her large chest, and her mom bought her a binder. So if your parents question you before you’re ready to come out as trans, just tell them it’s common for cis girls to get binders when they get bullied for their chests. 

If you’re allowed to wear boy’s clothes, tell your parents a binder will allow you to fit into your clothes better. Button down shirts are a good example of this, most are difficult to fit without a binder.

You could also tell your parents they’re in style right now, and that everyone else has one. 

If you exercise, tell your parents your sports bras aren’t doing you justice and that your chest hurts when you exercise, and that you need something with more compression. (But of course, don’t actually exercise in your binder, just use this for an excuse)

GETTING YOUR OWN BINDER

Do a summer job such as delivering newspapers, washing cars, mowing lawns, dog walking, etc. Then take the money to the store and buy a gift card, such as one from Visa, then use it to order your binder. When it arrives and if your parents end up questioning you, tell them it’s a holiday/birthday gift for someone else, and that it’s a surprise. They’ll usually end up forgetting about it, especially if the birthday or holiday is months away. 

Join Swagbucks. Earn money doing surveys and use it to buy a Visa card online to order your binder. I can confirm this works.

Sign up for binder giveaways. You can find these on Instagram, Tumblr, and YouTube. 

Sign up for a free binder at point5cc.com/chest-binder-donation or pointofpride.org/chest-binder-donations. This method takes longer than steps #1 and #2, the waiting list is long.

If you can’t ship your binder to your house if your parents open all your mail, try having it shipped to a friend’s house (with permission), if they don’t have nosy, invasive parents. Your friend could put your package in their backpack and give it to you at school, or you could drop by early in the morning to pick it up yourself.

BINDER SAFETY

Don’t wear it for longer than 8 hours.

Don’t use ace bandages. Only bind with compression bras and chest binders.

Don’t sleep in your binder.

Carry a sports bra with you in case you need to take it off.

Don’t exercise in your binder. Switch to a compression sports bra instead, which still flattens your chest, but there’s no risk of injury.

Don’t order a size smaller than you need, thinking it’ll create a flatter chest. This can cause tissue damage which will make you inelligible for top surgery in the future. 

Don’t wear more than one binder.

Don’t wear the binder if you’re sick, especially if it’s respiratory such as a cold or the flu.

If you feel dizzy, lightheaded, have trouble breathing, or are in any pain, take your binder off. Stretch your arms above your head, to your sides, and take several deep breaths in a row. Then cough several times to loosen any build up of fluid in your lungs. Then don’t put your binder back on.

Don’t wear binders if you’re going to be out in the heat. If you’re going to Pride Fest (or Disney World, or anywhere you’re out in the heat all day), for example, wear a sports bra instead. It’ll suck, but you don’t want to overheat and you want to be able to breathe easier since you’ll be walking all day.

If you have anxiety or are prone to sensory overload (especially from tight clothing items) map out bathrooms ahead of time in advance so that you can go in and change your binder if you start hyperventilating or, if you’re like me and have the urge to take sports bras/binders off as soon as you get overstimulated. 

POSITION YOUR CHESTICLES CORRECTLY

Ok so since not everyone is actually fortunate enough to go through an actual Gender Service, I’m going to write some Will and Probably Won’t things that come with going on T. For ref, I’ve been on T a year and my bf has been on for two. Let’s start;

Won’t:

You’ll wake up one day and sound like Morgan Freeman. 

Will:

Going on T will deepen your voice. 

For some people it may happen quite suddenly, for others gradually. Most likely you’ll sound like you have a bad cold for a while and then it’ll even out and be different. If you like to sing, be aware of voice cracks and suddenly being unable to sing as high as you used to. Some guys get lucky and still retain singing prowess, but be aware there’s a high chance you won’t. 

Each person’s vocal change is different. My voice cracked literally after the first injection, whilst my bf had to wait a while for changes. Don’t be worried if it appears your voice isn’t changing and be aware it may not go incredibly deep. It will probably be more noticeable to others than you and eventually it’ll feel like your normal voice. Your pets will recognise your voice, they will always come to know you. 

Won’t:

Face shape will change drastically to become more masculine.

Will:

After a while on T, you may experience some change in face and body shape. 

A lot of trans boys I know seem to believe they’ll wake up one day and just have the perfect masc face. Everyone is different, I can’t stress this enough. You may experience a huge change in the face, you may experience almost nothing. My bf always had a very round ‘moon’ face and his cheeks have started to slim down but his facial shape is more or less the same. As for myself I’ve not noticed anything too considerable yet. 

The same goes for the broadening of the shoulders. If you’re very slender to begin with, you’re probably never going to be Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, but you might experience some changes. Again, don’t be disheartened, everyone is different. 

Won’t:

The fat in your breasts will break down from going on T and make you look a lot more flat, if your chest is small you may not even have to wear a binder.

Will:

If you have A cups, then maybe the breakdown that happens with T will mean you don’t have to bind. However, the breakdown from T alone is very small unless you’re on it for years. Also be aware that a lot of the fat in your body in general is going to start focusing on your stomach. It’ll become easier to gain muscle once on T, but if you don’t exercise, the weight you lose from other areas will go to your stomach. But also, muscle weighs more than fat, remember that. You may drop clothing sizes, which can be a pain if you’re already quite small and have trouble finding masc clothes to fit you, trust me I know. 

Also a note on binders: Do not use bandages or cheap binders. Do not. Binders can cause damage after prolonged use when you’re using a proper binder nevermind anything else. Bandages are made to contract and not let in moisture, they are not good for being tight around the chest! Cheap binders are also usually not breathable and will hurt more than they should! It could cost a lot, but forking out for a proper binder from places like gc2b or lesloveboat is really going to be worth it. There is the sports bra method if you can’t get a binder because you’re not Out yet and couldn’t justify getting a binder to your parents etc but even then it’s not as safe as a proper binder.

Any binder shouldn’t be worn for longer than recommended, and will most likely rub especially when the T starts to make you sweat more. There’s also going to be an increase in acne on the chest around where the binder fits. If your chest ever really starts to hurt, find somewhere to take the binder off. I don’t care where you are, if you’re getting huge chest pains, take the damn thing off. If you damage yourself the chance of being able to get surgery reduces drastically, not to mention a whole lot of health problems you don’t want to deal with. It’s harsh, but it’s a lot better for you. Get a binder in the next size up and try again.

Won’t:

My periods will stop immediately and I’ll never have them again.

Will:

Eventually your periods will stop, though you may spot occasionally whilst you still have the necessary organs.

Though everyone is different, don’t be disheartened if you still have a period or two after starting T, you’ll stop eventually. You could also go a while without a period and then spot before stopping again. If the spotting continues for a while, or if you start to experience severe cramping, go and see a doctor. 

Won’t:

I’m going to get angry and aggressive a lot when on T!

Will:

Your emotions will be doing a whole lot of different things. Your may get angry, and you may also find your sex drive increases. You might also get upset more often or at things that never upset you before, or aren’t necessarily sad. I cried listening to that Chick Chick song, it’s ridiculous. It won’t last forever, be patient with yourself, there’s nothing wrong with you it’s basically just puberty (again).

Last things - 

Hair growth all depends on the person, the face being the last place that will probably grow hair and even then you’ll probably only have a tiny fluff for a long time, unless you’re lucky. My bf is experiencing hair in places now that I started growing extremely quickly right away. It could be to do with my having dark hair and him being a redhead tbh. But you will grow hair, all over. All over. Be prepared for that. You will get hair in places you never had much if any hair before. I have hair on my chest now. Not a whole lot but it’s there. The stomach is another hotspot for hair growth on T.

You will get acne, you will start to stink, sweat more and you may get growing pains. Look up Male Puberty, seriously, it’ll give you a good idea of some of the stuff that will start happening to you. Until your hormones calm down, your acne will not ultimately improve even with skincare. If you’re under 21, you might grow a little and the pains will be considerable. I gained like maybe an inch so I’m still short af but that’s something.

Your clit will start to get bigger. I know talking about the female genitalia we have is a big dysphoria bomb for a lot of us, but you need to read this. Your clit will get bigger, maybe considerably, maybe so much that the lips won’t hide it any more (if they ever did). It will rub against your underwear and/or your packer. For me it’s just mildly irritating, though for my bf it actually hurts (stings) him. It will be really sensitive either way. Be aware of that. 

Some people you don’t see every day or aren’t very close to may not recognise you when considerable changes occur. Use this to your advantage! Reintroduce yourself! 

If you self-inject, be prepared to mess up. There will be pain, swelling and bruising. If you have a nurse to inject you (like we do) there’s a change that they too might occasionally catch a nerve and you may bruise. Do not inject directly into a vein.

It’s perfectly fine to cry because of growing pains, pain from rubbing etc. You can be a man and still cry and complain but at least be aware of what to expect. 

Most changes will be so gradual that you’ll never look in the mirror and see a stranger, it’ll be like this was always the way you were.

If you do however, start to become really distressed by the changes or start to see nothing but a stranger in the mirror, please reconsider whether HRT is the right thing for you. The last thing you want is to be stuck with changes that are actually distressing you. It’s ok if you thought you wanted/needed this but then realised you didn’t/don’t. 

Okay, this is about to be a long list but I hope it helps someone.  Being genderfluid myself, I just showered for the first time in several days because of my disabling dysphoria.  I always see tons of tips about clothing, hair, behavior, and even makeup, but I don’t see a lot of tips on here about dealing with shower dysphoria.  Some of this is going to be aimed at trans*, genderfluid, and genderqueer individuals specifically, and some of these tips are for agender and other nonbinary individuals, but most can be applied to all of the above.  Let’s get started!

- If possible, listen to music.  Whether it’s on a phone, laptop, or portable radio, listen to music you enjoy, and listen to it as loudly as you’re able.  It helps me to have something else to focus on while I go through the motions of showering, even if it’s my own horrible singing.

- Use shower products marketed towards the gender you identify with. Since I’m genderfluid, I keep both “male” and “female” bodywashes, shampoos, and face washes in my shower so that however I’m feeling, I’ve got the products available to reduce dysphoria as much as I’m able.

- Have your clothes ready inside the bathroom with you. I always make sure that my clothes are completely prepared for me to throw them on as quickly as possible after my shower.  My dysphoria is increased significantly when I’m undressed, so not wasting time turning my clothes right-side out, or searching for clothes helps.

- Keep a mental list of the steps you need to complete during your shower.  1. Prepare clothes 2. Turn on water 3. Get in shower 4. Shampoo hair; ect. Having a mental list of specific steps you need to complete helps break the process down so it isn’t so overwhelming, and you’ll be able to keep track of how close you are to being done.

- Use genderless shower products.  Unfortunately, it’s pretty hard to find shampoos and body wash that aren’t marketed a specific way.  The best brand that I’ve found is Lush products.  Almost all of their products aren’t targeted to any gender at all.  Unfortunately, if you don’t live close to a store (the closest one to me is over two hours away) it can get pricey buying online once shipping and taxes are applied.   One that has been suggested a couple times is Trader Joe’s brand, but I’ve been told it mainly pertains to the west coast. Also, a more widespread brand is Head and Shoulders! If anyone knows of any more common, genderless brands, feel free to add on or message me and I’ll edit it in!

Edit: A ton of people have suggested showering with the lights off in the replies/reblogs. The only reason I haven’t edited this particular suggestion into the main post as I have with the others is because, as many have pointed out, this can be unsafe. If there are windows letting in natural light or you have some candles, I say go ahead! I just worry about the potential hazard of showering in total darkness.

Edit: Since making this post, I have also discovered that covering mirrors helps a lot! My mirror directly faces my shower so there’s no way to totally avoid it when getting out. I cover the mirror with either a towel or a large shirt and it helps so much!

Unfortunately, for those of us with dysphoria, showering is probably always going to suck at least a little bit. If anyone else has helpful tips, feel free to reblog with your additions.  If you’re not comfortable with that, message me on here and I can edit it in.

Above all, just remember that:

Your dysphoria does not define who you are.

You are valid.

okay i’ve been getting quite a few asks about this so i thought i’d just make a post about it. i’ll split it into three categories based on experience - easy, medium, and hard. let me know if y’all are interested in a bodybuilding split workout then i’ll post one of those too.

easy - if you’re new to working out or strength training

knee pushups - 5 sets of 10 reps

sit ups - 3 sets of 10 reps

mountain climbers - 2 sets of 20 reps

lunges - 3 sets of 10 reps (5 per leg)

alternating arm/leg raises - 4 sets of 10 reps

jumping jacks - 4 sets of 10 reps

medium - a slightly more challenging if you feel like the above one is too easy

pushups - 5 sets of 10 reps

sit ups - 3 sets of 15 reps

squats - 3 sets of 10 reps (make sure to go down below parallel)

pike push-ups - 3 sets of 10 reps

plank - 2 sets of 60 second hold

doorway rows - 4 sets of 10 reps (link coz its a little unknown)

burpees - 5 sets of 10 reps

hard - if you’ve been working out before and want something a little challenging

pushups - 5 sets of 10 reps

diamond pushup - 2 sets of 6 reps

squats - 5 sets of 10 reps

pullups - 2 sets of 10 reps

reverse crunches - 3 sets of 10 reps

wall sit - 3 sets of 60 second hold

Okay, so let’s get one thing out of the way now: this is not overnight. You’ll have to discipline yourself to do this for weeks until you get your desired result. After some time it will just come naturally.

STEP 1:

Stand against a wall or door with your feet together and heels touching the wall. Stand up STRAIGHT. If your posture is impotent, then this ain’t happening.

(if you can’t stand, sit as straight as you can)

STEP 2:

RELAX. Don’t tense up your whole body, especially not your shoulders. This is so easy to do.

STEP 3:

Press the back of your neck against the wall (it’s fine if it doesn’t actually touch, we’re just working the muscles)

STEP 4:

Start speaking for 10 minutes. Find a magazine, book, article or even recite a monologue if you know any. You’ll notice your voice is already dropping two octaves.

STEP 5:

DRINK!! WATER!!!! If you feel your throat scatching or at all painful, STOP!! Take a break! And drink water, no ice.

STEP 6:

After ten minutes (or however long you can do) lay down flat. Keep your body straight. Relax your whole body. Try a visualisation where you relax from your feet up into your head. Doing this will give your throats a chance to cool down (it’s still a muscle!!)

**Bonus Tips**

HONEY - it coats your throats and protects it from damage. Use it before and/or after this exercise.

HOT TEA - I suggest ginger, but you can really pick whatever kind you want. As long it’s not coffee.

WATER!!!!

A CORK - if you’re wanting to go the extra mile, put a cork in your mouth and speak. This helps enunciation and can really help.

DON’T FORCE - if you force your voice to sound low it will sound very artificial

BE PATIENT - It’s gonna take time! Take it as a challenge.

I have tried humming while moving my head, singing to Panic! At The Disco and literally EVERY other thing to lower my voice and this is the only thing that has worked.

From a beginner’s perspective, small tidbits that made all the difference over the past few months as I’ve adjusted to binding.

Note: these don’t necessarily apply to everyone, it’s from my own experience, as a 36 C-Cup non binary person who has tried 3 different types of binders from 3 different companies, and has been binding for 6 months.

When they say “Don’t put your binder on when you’re wet” that includes sweat! If you’re sweaty at all or even just a tiny bit damp from a recent shower, it’ll be harder to put on a half tank binder and a serious struggle to put on a full one. And often, also hard to take off. Dry yourself off or wait.

There’s a big difference between a half tank binder and a full one. This might seem fairly obvious to most of you, but I didn’t think about it that much, and I personally would absolutely recommend starting with a half tank one. Half tanks are much much easier to take on and off and not nearly as hot and stifling, but they also don’t shape your entire torso, which some people dislike. Another pro of a full tank would be that, for me personally, it wasn’t as hard on my back as a half tank is. However, I still recommend starting with a half tank because it’s a smaller adjustment for a beginner than throwing yourself right into a full-torso binder and struggling more.

Practice taking it on and off before you wear it day-to-day. Binders, for someone who isn’t used to the method, can be really annoying to maneuver in and out of. I got stuck in my full tank binder three times and I was lucky to have supportive friends and family who could help me. Have a trusted friend or family member nearby the first few times you’re taking it on and off in case you get stuck, and practice so you can do it on your own. Here’s a good guide to taking off a full tank, the same methods apply for taking off a half.

Read reviews, but don’t take them as gospel. Binding is different for everyone who does it. Even the tips I’m giving now are pretty general, but still don’t apply to everyone. Often reviews on binders have some common threads of complaint or compliment, but other comments will be wildly conflicting. Pay attention to the most common ideas in the reviews when making your decision, but take a lot of the rest with a grain of salt.

Your flesh is going to do things that make you insecure. Our bodies weren’t really designed to be put into binders. It’s unfortunate, but true. So, especially if you have a big chest, your flesh isn’t going to just magically disappear under your binder- some often gets pushed up into the armholes, or into weird positions with one breast up and one down, so now you have to try to push and pull your chest under the binder so that your pecs are even… essentially, it’s not going to be perfect. And that’s fine. It’s just a part of binding. It still looks great, and honestly, if I had both breasts under my binder going in completely opposite directions so my pectorals were uneven, the only person who would notice would be me, and only if I were wearing a tight shirt. So you’re fine. Breathe.

‘No exercise’ doesn’t only mean 'don’t go to the gym’ it means don’t do exercise. You know what’s exercise? Lifting and moving big heavy things. Running all the way across campus twice because you’re late to class. Mowing the lawn on a warmer day. Sex, a lot of the time, unless your partner is doing almost all the work (not necessarily a bad thing!) So, a lot of things are exercise, not just doing a hundred pushups or playing a sport. If your binder company says you shouldn’t wear their binders during exercise, DON’T do it. If you feel lightheaded or dizzy after standing up or walking too long, first of all, your binder might be too small, and secondly, that means it’s too much exercise, ho! Take your binder off or lay down someplace cool and drink water. Note: Some brands say you can exercise in their products as long as you go up a size, so check for that!

Just some tips I’ve learned over the years to help with my boyfriend’s dysphoria

I’ve seen so many of these posts for trans boys but never for the lovely ladies, so here are some tips to feel a bit more feminine if you’re not out

Glossy chapstick, if asked about it say you just have chapped lips and it works well, or if you want a tint and can stand it, those cheap Pepsi/cola chapstick make your lips looks red [you can make them very red or less depending on how much you use]

If your family isn’t too judgey you could wear foundation or just buy it for yourself and say you’re embarrassed about acne or a scar or something,

If you’re more into emo/goth culture thats a good excuse to grow out your hair/wear makeup

You could wear panties under your boxers and just do your own laundry, and buy a feminine outfit you can wear when by yourself, and/or girly sleeping clothes

You can get yourself a pink hello kitty shirt or pink backpack or something like little girls would wear and say you got it to be ironic

If you’ve got a close friend you could get matching rings/necklaces/bracelets and say it’s for friendship or a cute girl/boy made you a bracelet in class and it makes you happy to wear it [or lie about having a close friend and just wear the jewelry]

Spandex. Like the thing to hide your tummy? It accents curves real nice and you can wear it under so many things, or if you can’t do that cuz you’ll get found out get long underwear, like the long black shirt and pants you wear in winter? They work amazing too

Get your ears periced if you can

Write your self a message on you’re phone, using the correct pronouns, or get your backround to “you go, girl!” Or something like that and just say irony/ it was a friends prank and you wanna keep it/ it just empowers you Nd u couldn’t find a “you go, boy!”

Change your blog to be a bit more ‘girly’ and make ur videogame characters girls and use your preferred name!! You can just say its supposed to be a random person or a celebrity really of you want

And get yourself a notebook and write about yourself in like third person using your preferred name and pronouns and if found just say your writing a story or it’s for school

Wear longer socks that cover your calf cause they cover your legs if you can’t shave them

Shave your legs if you can, if not your arms and armpits [just say you sweat a lot and that would help, though there are plenty of cis females who do not shave their arms, so don’t feel pressured too!! ]

Wear girls deordeant if you can

Use lotion. Sounds simple but rlly, mosteruise after you shower, soft skin and plus thats thought of a more feminine activity, plus u can get you some really nice smelling stuff and just says it works well or you didn’t realize it was that strong when you got it or didn’t realise it would smell like that at all

Pinching your cheeks makes them a bit blushy [not for that long] but you could do it when meeting people and such

Get a cute stuffed animal for your bed and just say its from a girl/boy you like or irony

Blow dry your hair instead of towel dry, it makes your hair fluffy and soft

Use girls shampoo or body wash

Wear light colors

Wear tighter clothes or floral things

And remember you are a girl whether you’re out or not or if people believe you

Social security card

Driver’s license

Passport

Birth certificate

Employer HR

Bank account

Credit card company

Car insurance

Health insurance

Utilities

Cell phone account

Voter registration

Your school

Professional organizations (for nursing, bar, teaching, etc.)

Doctor’s office & other health specialists

TV & internet

Paypal

A while back i found a tutorial but i cant find it, but i remember how to do it, so in result i made my own to help all of my transmasculine brothers who can’t afford packers, aren’t out to everyone, or can’t buy a packer for any other reason! You’re all so strong for getting through each and every day and i hope this makes your daily lives better!! I love you all!!!

Materials: Five(5) socks of the same size, three(3) rubber bands/hair ties, one(1) or two(2) safety pins(i used one(1))

Step 1: Fold three(3) socks together, either from the inner sock or an outer one, so that there are two(2) inside of one(1).

Step 2: take the other two socks and fold them into mostly spherical shapes.

Step 3: put one of the balled up socks into the other.

Step 4: put the two balled up socks into the other group of socks, just before where the two inside socks are.

Step 5: put a rubber band towards the tip, another one between where the balled up socks are and the folded ones, and one between the edge and the balled up socks.

Step 6: fold the edge over so that it shapes the balled up socks some more and put the safety pin on top of that.

Step 7: use the safety pin to attach the packer to the inside or outside of your underwear(inside if youre using traditionally mens underwear, outside if you use traditionally female underwear. I’d also suggest putting another pair of underwear or compression shorts/leggings over it if you pin it outside to keep it in place better.)

• If you have ANY trouble breathing, feel faint/dizzy, or are in pain: Take your binder off immediately, stretch your arms above your head then to your side, take several deep breaths in a row, cough to loosen any build up fluid in your lungs, and do not put your binder back on.

• If you are experiencing a cold/flu/allergies, and you feel you MUST bind, please consider using a looser binder, or one with a zipper/velcro for quick and easy removal.

• If you know you have a cold/flu/any infection in the lungs/ or stomach bug, please do not wear your binder until your symptoms have passed. (I know it’s hard, but be safe. Throwing up or having a coughing fit with one on is painful and dangerous.)

• When the weather starts to get cold, remember that layers are your friend, but overheating can still happen. Be aware of what you’re wearing with your binder, and keep track of your amount of exertion.

• If you are someone who suffers from panic attacks, anxiety, claustrophobia, etc, try to keep track of your usual signals and be ready to loosen/remove your binder when and where you can. (Again, zipper/velcro binders are the best for this) I would also suggest coats and jackets you can easily remove/open for this exact purpose.

• Again, if you suffer from any sort of anxiety disorder (or even if you don’t) , consider mapping out private spaces and restrooms ahead of time, in case you need to remove/adjust your binder.

• PLEASE do not wear your binder when you are sick. Seriously.