fuck.

i eat a lot of bread because it’s soft and i deserve it. also i am gorgeous

[ID: A photo of a pigeon. It does, in fact, look gorgeous.]

you know what you shouldnt do? constantly tell your child how expensive they are to take care of. because eventually, that child gets scared of asking for money, and doesnt feed themself at school, doesnt go places with their friends that require money, because she doesnt want to be expensive. it really does get into their minds, that theyre too much money and that they shouldnt do anything.

one thing about me is i’m gonna go lay down

Does anyone want to get matching tattoos and immediately have an unsalvageable falling out

you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life

i will sniff that man like a line of coke