♡

I always know,I’m #aware

date a girl who can kick your ass because chances are she’ll be able to save it

it is a Scientifically Proven Fact that once a group of people become friends, the tendency to make really foolish decisions skyrockets…. and from this chaos…. the Mom Friend™ rises, ready to keep everyone alive, armed with exasperation and common sense in spades

I’m not like most girls *long pause as I sip chocolate milk through my very complex straw* I’m worse

i am strong and you do not intimidate me

I hate first impressions because the first impression I always give people is “the girl who doesn’t talk”

I feel this on a spiritual level

you’re my best friend / wingman and this horrible, obnoxious human being has been hitting on me for an hour and wont take the hint so you come up and make out with me and wow i wasn’t expecting to see stars au