I don't even know anymore...

Please Come Support my Sister

We can't tailor a happy ending for eight billion people. The truth is that millions, if not billions, will suffer for most of their lives before they die. Why can't I stomach that truth? I wrestle with it every day. Every time I hear about abuse, violence, or someone simply being forgotten, my mind immediately starts turning, trying to find some way to help.

I don't have money. I don't have influence. I'm one of the millions who could use a hand pulling me out of the mud and tending to my own wounds. Yet I find myself looking past my own struggles because I know there are others drowning too. I'm willing to be a hand reaching back because I've learned there usually isn't a hero waiting just over the horizon.

For those of you who suffer in silence, or suffer out loud while no one seems to listen, I do. I always will. All I have to offer is my time and myself. Sometimes that doesn't feel like enough, but sometimes being seen, being heard, and being believed is exactly what someone needs.

Writing to Break Free

A lot of the time I don't really know what I'm trying to say, or even where to begin. The thoughts already exist in my head, but translating them into words has always been the difficult part.

What confuses me is that I feel such a relentless need to try.

It doesn't make much sense. I couldn't care less what people think of me. The only opinion that has ever truly mattered is my own. Yet I keep feeling pulled toward writing down my thought process, not to convince people that I'm right, but because maybe someone else will recognize something in it that helps them.

I see so much in the world that weighs on me. My own problems are real enough, but it's the struggles of other people that keep the gears in my head turning. I find myself constantly asking, Is there an answer? Is there another way?

That feeling isn't directed toward one person. I help individuals however I can, but this is different. It has been with me since I was a child, since I learned what orphans were, what hunger was, and that so many people suffer because of circumstances they never chose.

I became hungry for an answer.

At first I searched for answers for my family and my friends. Somewhere along the way, that search quietly expanded until it became a search for everyone.

I've listened to the self-help books. I've heard the advice telling me to let go, to stop carrying the weight of problems I can't solve, to focus only on my own life. Yet here I am, still asking the questions.

Maybe that's foolish.

Or maybe ignoring the feeling would be the greater mistake.

I've learned to trust that voice inside me, even when I can't fully explain it. Before I have the words, I already know what feels true.

The moments I've been most proud of myself weren't when I succeeded. They were the moments when I stood up for people whose voices weren't being heard. Even when I stumbled over my words, I spoke anyway.

Years ago, in the middle of a crowded convention, I raised my voice for a group of people who didn't even have a name for what they were experiencing. Today, they have an identity and a place in the conversation. I'm not claiming I created that change. I'm saying I recognized something that deserved to be acknowledged before most people were willing to see it.

That's the kind of person I want to continue being.

The difficult part is that I'm trapped in the same economic prison my family has lived in for generations. Escaping it has proven harder than determination alone can overcome.

I know I'm not the only one.

Somewhere in the world, the greatest violinist who ever lived will never touch a violin. A brilliant scientist will never enter a laboratory. A gifted teacher will never stand in front of a classroom. A visionary builder, artist, healer, or inventor may spend a lifetime simply trying to survive.

Potential is everywhere.

Opportunity isn't.

If there's one thing I hope people take from this, it's that more of us choose to push against the cages we've inherited. They may be economic. They may be cultural. They may be the stories we've been told about who we're allowed to become.

We all have a place in this world.

Finding it isn't always easy.

Let’s talk about something that’s going to piss some of you off…Setting your air conditioner to 60°F is not a lifestyle choice. It’s a climate disaster and shows your privilage.

Every summer, without fail, the discourse resurfaces: “Don’t shame people for keeping their AC low, some people need it.”

I agree. Some people do. Chronic illness, extreme heat exposure, vulnerable elders and those with real valid reasons.

I am not talking to them. I am talking about the rest of you. You’re not being cute. You’re not relatable. What you’re broadcasting is, “I have the privilege to destroy shared systems for my own comfort, and I feel no shame.”

----Let’s Talk Numbers---- The U.S. Department of Energy recommends 78°F for efficiency. Most people can live comfortably at 74–78°F without medical issues. Cranking it to 60°F is extreme and mostly cultural habit or preference, not necessity.

AC is one of the largest drivers of electricity demand on the planet: It accounts for ~10% of global electricity use In the U.S., AC use alone emits 117 million metric tons of CO₂ per year

(Source: U.S. Department of Energy) https://www.energy.gov/energysaver/air-conditioning More?…Okay… https://www.iea.org/reports/the-future-of-cooling

The International Energy Agency that I hope is crediable enough for all you oh so savvy internet know it alls. Here is there my BS sources so that somebody actually thinks about the information that I feel like I have to scream in order to be taken seriously. https://mediabiasfactcheck.com/international-energy-agency-iea/

Every time you lower your thermostat by a single degree, you increase your energy use by 3–5%. Running your home at 60°F while it’s 100°F outside isn’t efficient. It is wasteful.

And it’s Not Just Electricity. Air conditioning units leak HFCs…hydrofluorocarbons. Greenhouse gases that are thousands of times more potent than carbon dioxide. These emissions trap more heat in the atmosphere, making the future even hotter. Cough, Cough…here is some more fucking sources you ignorant asshats who still don't believe that "You are part of the problem. You and people like you!"

https://www.ccacoalition.org/short-lived-climate-pollutants/hydrofluorocarbons-hfcs

So yes, you are literally making the problem worse every time you “can’t live without cold air.” Am I still allow to ironically put [insert image here] or is that going to make you all scream this was written by AI

“But What About AI?” Since everyone looooooooooooovessss to justify their actions by the evil of AIs. Let’s get this straight before the techbros jump in.

All data centers combined, including those running AI, are so far behind AC and and industry usage, yet they are the new villian of the season. I am not saying that AI doesn't have an impact I am only suggesting that you see how easily you are being influence by the distractions you say you are too intelligent to be manipulated by. What makes you think that you are so special to avoid being manipulated?

Since apparently facts don’t matter unless they’re handed to you like a Yelp review, here’s your damn source.

https://www.ifri.org/en/papers/ai-data-centers-and-energy-demand-reassessing-and-exploring-trends-0

Global AC use? Over 2,000 TWh/year IEA, Nature, OpenAI, Google estimates

That means air conditioning currently uses 5–10x more energy than AI. AI is growing fast but it’s not the one blowing cold air into your empty living room at 60°F for eight hours a day.

Here is another kick in the ass you genius internet warrior bards need which is it never had to be this way. So not only are you being fooled…you’re part of a legacy of design failure and denial. Fools who build our cities and homes like heat traps, then sold you AC to survive the consequences. We stripped trees, paved shade, built homes with black roofs and no airflow, and said, “Good luck, hope your AC works!”

Meanwhile: Indigenous and traditional architecture in hot climates uses natural insulation, earth walls, reflective surfaces, shaded courtyards. People dress in light, breathable fabric, move with the sun, and build structures around the land, not against it. But instead of learning from that, we slap an AC on the problem and call it progress.

Here’s what your 60°F thermostat setting actually says:

"I don’t care if I’m straining the grid and increasing the risk of blackouts for families who can’t afford AC."

"I don’t care that I’m emitting greenhouse gases thousands of times more dangerous than CO₂."

"I don’t care that I’m pushing the climate further toward collapse, so long as I get to sleep cold."

Your comfort is coming at someone else’s cost. Stop pretending it’s neutral. We change how we live, not just what we buy.

>Set your thermostat to 76–78°F. It’s literally fine. >Wear lighter clothing, especially at home. >Plant trees, grow shade, ditch turf grass for heat-resilient landscapes. >Support home designs with natural ventilation, thick walls, and shaded facades. >Normalize sweating a little instead of torching the world.

And be angry about this. Be loud about it. Because the AC abusers will get defensive. They’ll say they’re being “shamed.” Good. Shame is a social tool. Let’s start using it for the climate.

Want more data you can’t argue with?

They tell the common man to recycle, ride a bike, and turn down the thermostat…

Meanwhile, just 10 private jet users could cut over 17,000 tons of CO₂ a year just by flying half as much.

That’s the same as: 🌲 Planting 800,000 trees 🚗 Taking 3,800 cars off the road 🏠 Powering 1,000 homes for a year

Top 10 Private Jet Users in 2024

Estimated CO₂ Emissions (metric tons)

Eric Schmidt 7,355 ---493 flights covering 612,578 miles

P Diddy 5,154 ---308 flights in the first half of 2024.

Elon Musk 5,105 --- 320 flights totaling over 42 days

Kim Kardashian 4,701 ---236 flights covering almost 240,000 miles

Jay-Z 4,594 ---291 flights covering 286,000 miles

Kylie Jenner 4,170

Bill Gates 3,818 ---216 flights covering over 359,000 miles

Drake 3,437 ---116 trips

Michael Bloomberg 3,423 ---306 flights in 2024.

Luke Bryan 3,373 Almost 650 flights covering 373,000 miles

Climate responsibility shouldn't fall only on everyday people. The ultra-rich need to lead by example.

Checking out Greensky and got so angry that I had to write it out...please tell me you guys actually understand this and it is just the rest of the world that needs to clue in.

Everyone’s talking about the damages of AI and treating Teslas like they’re going to reverse climate change.

They won’t. They’re distractions. Shiny, expensive, high-tech distractions that let the real problem off the hook. To move a conversation from the real issue.

Let’s talk about who’s actually killing the planet. Because it’s not you. It’s not me. It’s not your neighbor who forgot to recycle their almond milk carton.

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-----The richest 1% of the global population emit more carbon than the bottom 66% combined.

That’s right. While you’re stressing over paper straws and reusable grocery bags, billionaires are flying private jets from conference to conference to talk about how to fight climate change.

Source: https://www.oxfam.org/en/press-releases/carbon-emissions-richest-1-percent-more-double-emissions-poorest-half-humanity

-----The U.S. military is the world’s biggest institutional polluter.

It uses more fossil fuels than entire countries. It’s not regulated by the Paris Agreement. No one talks about it.

Source: https://watson.brown.edu/costsofwar/files/cow/imce/papers/2019/Pentagon%20Fuel%20Use%2C%20Climate%20Change%20and%20the%20Costs%20of%20War%20Final.pdf

-----100 companies are responsible for 71% of all global industrial emissions since 1988.

You read that right. One hundred companies. Chevron, ExxonMobil, BP, Shell and they knew what they were doing.

They didn’t stop. They funded climate denial.

Source: https://www.cdp.net/en/press-releases/new-report-shows-just-100-companies-are-source-of-over-70-of-emissions

-----EVs don’t fix this.

Most electricity still comes from fossil fuels (60% in the U.S.) Lithium mining destroys ecosystems and drains water from Indigenous lands. Rich countries just export pollution to the Global South

Electric cars might reduce your footprint, but they’re still built on extractive systems. And guess what? The richest 1% will just buy more of them. More land, more energy, more mining.

Source: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-021-24487-w

-----Efficiency doesn’t mean less. It often means MORE. This is called the Jevons Paradox: when things get more efficient, consumption often goes up.

We’re consuming 4x more materials now than in 1970.

Source: https://www.greenchoices.org/news/blog-posts/the-jevons-paradox-when-efficiency-leads-to-increased-consumption

-----Billionaires emit over a million times more carbon than the average person.

But sure, tell me more about my thermostat.

Source: https://www.oxfam.org/node/21337

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The only real solutions are the ones the rich fear most:

End fossil fuel subsidies

Tax the carbon billionaires

Ban private jets

Invest in Indigenous land rights

Degrowth for the wealthy, not the poor

Global climate reparations

This is not about personal choices. This is about power.

Until we stop chasing trending topics and misinformation to cause conflicts of opinions, we will keep losing time. We will keep losing species. We will keep losing lives.

I kind of wish you could rename a generation. Like, what even is “Millennial” supposed to mean? It feels so off for us—those of us born around the turn of the millennium. Gen Y, sure, that’s fine, but I always thought it should’ve been Generation Why.

See what I did there?

It just fits. It's cool in a very cool kind of way, but also it just makes sense. We are a generation that asks why. Why is it this way? Why can't it be different? Why has no one changed this yet?

I’ll claim it. I’m Gen Y. Born in 1991, in all the best ways. That year has some great history behind it, but I guess every birth year does, right? So many things happening that shape your life before you even know how to spell your own name.

I remember thinking a lot about that during early 2020. I was pregnant then, expecting my son in June. And I just kept wondering what kind of world am I bringing this baby into? A sentiment that a lots of parents every generation share. There was so much uncertainty. So many things I wanted to protect him from. And it all felt so wildly different from my daughter’s birth, where at least 20 people met her on her first day earthside.

No exaggeration, my family literally stayed in an RV in the hospital parking lot. They didn’t want to overwhelm me but also wanted to be right there, ready to run and grab anything I needed. Including, yes, a much-needed Taco Bell run after almost a full day of labor.

She wasn’t the first grandchild, not in either family, but both sides are big and love an excuse to celebrate. Her birth felt like a party.

My son didn’t get any of that. It was just us. We had just moved to a new state. One that made more sense for a growing family trying to survive on one income. It was the right call, but we gave up proximity to our people. Then travel got restricted, everything changed, and suddenly we were alone. The fear was everywhere. The playgrounds had caution tape, the news was relentless, and people were dying.

It felt so heavy. And in that contrast, I kept thinking about how much had shifted.

But seriously, the word Millennial doesn’t age well. It conjures up this image, a caricature, and really out-of-date, out-of-touch, tech-obsessed kids who say “you just don’t get it” and talk about “vibes” while refusing to make eye contact. Like that’s still how we’re seen. It hasn’t grown with us. And yet… here we are, still being labeled like we’re all wearing ironic T-shirts and living in our parents’ basements.

So when I ask why I can’t want what I want or expect what I expect, suddenly I’m the entitled Millennial? No. What I want, what I expect, is to be respected. To be seen. To not be treated like a total idiot. Is that really so outrageous?

Generation Why. That’s who we are. We’ve been asking the questions no one wanted to ask. We are the new wave of thinkers. And now that we’re grown, we're looking around like 'How did this all go so wrong'? How did it get like this? And to the generations before us: what happened? What made you stop asking the hard stuff?

Still I believe most people are doing their best. Or I hope they are. I hold onto that. It makes the world easier to be in. I like to think that if someone meets me, they’ll give me the same benefit of the doubt I give them. That they won’t assume I’m being selfish or rude or trying to one-up them when I share a story. That I’m just… talking. Like people do. Like I’m doing now.

When I believe that, I worry less. I don’t spiral about how I sound, or whether I’m being too much. And it helps. Because yeah, maybe we’re all trying our best and maybe that looks different every day. That’s a belief I can hold onto even if someone showed me hard data to prove it wrong.

Why?