What Would Pope Boniface VIII Do?

thinkin' clementine thoughts. is she rotting is she melting is she becoming a child's drawing does she stink of dead russian sage

In most cases, this will mean using your perspicacity and improvisational skills to find, fashion, or create adequate substitutes.

once upon a time, there was a little boy called doug eiffel. and doug had a superpower: he could get inanimate objects to reproduce sounds happening very far away. modern science calls this power ‘radio.’ … doug eiffel also calls it ‘radio.’

Seek external validation. Your A.I. and superior officers are better judges of your character than you are.

Don’t look directly into stars.

Clem, who failed upward so hard she became the queen of a soulless army of objective false truths

It takes two to tango.

Always be ready to spring into action when an emergency arises. REMEMBER: The work you are doing as part of your day-to-day routine represents the culmination of an enormous investment, both in terms of man-hours and capital. Don’t be so quick to solve a short-term problem with solutions that disrupt the mission’s long-term goals, or vice versa. Strive for balance at all times.

Dehydration induced psychosis isn’t nearly as fun as the name would suggest. However, that doesn’t mean it can’t be fun.

The person who tries to keep everyone happiest often ends up feeling the loneliest. Go ahead and take that last piece.

The generic space suit helmets are just as good as the brand-name ones.

Stubbornness, when properly cultivated and judiciously applied, may be a powerful tool for motivation and a rich source of the physical might you need to survive.

ONSIDE: In the ship doing your job. OFFSIDE: Floating aimlessly alone in space without your suit. Onside. Offside. Remember the difference.

The sooner you die, the sooner you’re forgotten.

Characteristics of a good order include clarity, specificity, brevity, and loopholes. You never know how improvisation can impact a scene.

Watching a horror movie burns more calories than any other film genre. Use your assigned VHS tape judiciously.