Learning Journal

Entry 3: Inspiring and motivating

- Your reactions to assigned readings

We had been assigned quite a few readings so far, and I am so thankful that all the readings were not dreading, but rather, “adviseful.” All the English classes I’ve taken prior to this one had always assigned readings that made me question “why is this important?” or “okay... and?” But this class, it’s different. There were three particular readings that stood out to me the most.

The main show, the star of the readings, Mary Pipher’s “Writing to Change the World,” has to be one of the best books I’ve picked up. After my senior year of high school, which was about three years ago, I thought I’d never have the passion to write again. I used to be so into journaling, and online blogging her on Tumblr, but I just “lost interest” I suppose. After reading this book, however, I was encouraged to write again. I wouldn’t say it was to “change the world” or anything, but more like “change my life for the better,” or even “change my outlook on life.” Ultimately, it has pushed me to go back into my roots, and reunite me with my happiness – writing.

“Beginner’s Mind, Pen, and Paper” by Natalie Goldberg screamed “ME” all over it. The excerpt had definitely confirmed my obsession with stationary. I bullet journal, regular journal, and bible journal, so you could only imagine the amount of notebooks and tools that I have. Choosing such materials help motivate me to write, but sometimes... I get too obsessed with finding the perfect tools and never get to the writing itself. So when Goldberg wrote “choose your tools carefully, but not so carefully that you get uptight or spend more time at the stationery store than at your writing table,” I felt that. 

Entry 2: The scary truth about freewriting

-Your own observations on our course themes and contents

I have only been freewriting for about three weeks now, and can I just say that it has probably been one of the most terrifying experiences ever. I say this because I am genuinely afraid to be alone with my thoughts. Just my luck, kidding, but this activity causes you to confront your thoughts, meaning, literally sit down and listen to the “bumbo jumbo” of your mind, and attempt to write it all down without sounding psycho. Okay, maybe that’s a little too far, but definitely on point for me. 

I tend to keep busy all the time. If I have even one second of being idle, I have an anxiety attack because I am so used to programming my mind to be pre-occupied with life and all the things it throws at me. Seriously. Now, thanks to this class, I have carved out about 10 minutes of my time, three to four times a week, running towards my thoughts instead of running away.

At first, I guess it seemed like I wasn’t up for the opportunity since I would write  “I don’t know what to write now” or “Ok, keep the pen moving.” Now, however, I legit write the most randomest things that come into mind. Is that even a word? Whatever, we will work with it since that is the term that best describes my thoughts. Wow, the last two sentences is basically me freewriting. 

I have actually grown to be fond of this activity, as my unfiltered writing has revealed some characteristics to myself. Is that weird? Nope. Like Pipher stated in her text, “Writing to Change the World,” “writing can teach us who we are” (33). This activity has definitely showed me who I am. It’s pretty scary at first, but it’s pretty fun and therapeutic overtime. I look forward to it, and I’m determined to make it a weekly activity, even after this semester ends. 

ENTRY 1: Reminiscing on change writing

- Personal history reflections on your previous experience with the topics and contents of class

Hopefully I’m not wrong, but I have the sense that this class focuses on the power of writing. I have to admit, the way the class is structured is by far the most creative and distinct approach I had ever encountered in an English class. I am, however, thankful to God that the course is more than a college requirement, but rather a more personal encounter with one’s inner voice.

We’ve been focusing on “change writing.” Upon reading Mary Pipher’s book, “Writing to Change the World,” I had revisited a familiar motive of wanting to write. Above is a photo of my book signing, where I got the opportunity to work with a YA author, Maurene Goo, in publishing my very own book. I was only sixteen when I had started writing the book, and then published it when I was seventeen. The opportunity was not a “I’m going to write a book” ordeal, but it started off with a required Senior Project. I decided that if I was going to invest much of my senior year into a project, I might as well go all out and dab into my passion for writing.

I had a pretty well known Tumblr blog, hi-aj.tumblr.com (can’t get into it since it got hacked). It was more of a collection of my thoughts and opinions on certain topics, but my posts attracted a significant amount of attention. I then got to the point where people would ask me for advice, or just stop by and thank me for “touching their hearts” in some way. I also got hate, but that is another story.

Point being, I saw how my thoughts, with all these grammatical errors and spelling mistakes, had the power to influence people in their own personal ways. I took this realization and decided to write a book about ten reasons why youth contemplate suicide. I did not do it in hopes to “change the world,” but i did it in hopes to change someone’s mind about ending their life. I did it for change, and I think this is what this class is all about: the idea that anyone can influence change.