Been a while since I've made a post about dnd! But here I am again, back on my bullshit. And today, I'd like to bring you..
The Unspoken Rules of Dungeons and Dragons
Rule number 1, and the most important. Always watch your fellow PCs' backs. I don't care how much your character doesn't like their character and I don't care how deep into a shit hole you are. Better to heal them somehow than leave it to chance with death saves. If there's anything you can do to prevent your teammate from dying, do! It!! My fighter took a fireball to the face to keep the sorcerer (who'd failed 2 death saves) and the bard (whom the fighter doesn't like) from taking more damage, and our ranger managed to get them back on their feet. Nobody wants to roll up a new character because you wanted to be cool in combat.
Rule 2, this one has been talked about to death and back. Don't. Split. The. Party. Especially not in a dungeon or combat. One, it's a surefire way to get everybody killed. God forbid you or anyone else in your group doesn't know healing spells because the cleric took a different path. Two, it can cause some players to feel left out. Someone I play with left a campaign because the DM ran 3 hours of dnd in which they were the only PC not included. Splitting the party never leads to good things happening. It's fine to split the player characters from NPCs, but don't separate the PCs.
Rule 3. Don't metagame. If you don't know what metagaming is, the best way I can describe it is using out of game knowledge to affect things that happen in game. For example, if you know you're fighting a certain enemy later, and you look up its stats and see it's resistant to fire damage. So your spellcaster doesn't cast fireball. Or, an easier example, looking up a creature's armor class so you automatically know what hits and what doesn't. This can spoil the fun for everyone at the table, including you. So don't do it.
Rule 4. This one's important. It's ok for your characters, or even players, to argue. If your cleric thinks what the rogue and bard are doing is a dumb fucking idea, it's ok for your cleric to voice that. My fighter and the bard at my table argue all the fucking time, to the point where an NPC and our sorcerer have compared them to a married couple. But it is important to separate the game from real life. Yes, the fighter and bard argue often. But we don't hate each other in real life. We've had our issues with each other, but I'm not gonna call him a stupid fucking bitch.
Rule 5. If you don't say it, it doesn't happen. If the DM isn't present, it doesn't happen. For an example, my DM pulled the sorcerer into a different voice chat and told me and the other 2 party members to talk about what the course of action was. And we did talk about it. In character. Big mistake. When DM got back 20 minutes later, he immediately retconned our conversation and told us to redo it with him there. In hindsight, it's funny as fuck. But in the moment, it was kinda dumb.
Rule 6, this one added in post. It's common to have quieter players at the table, whether they themselves are quiet or it's their character. Try your best to help them feel included. And if it's someone at the table who's making them go quiet, address it. For example, my group recently had to kick a player. I'd only played 2 sessions without this person, and the other 3 people in the group agreed that I did better without them. So we kicked them from our party and I'm doing better now. But while they were still there, our ranger often had to pitch into conversations like "*insert fighter name*, what do you think?" Or things of the like. I didn't talk because I never got the chance. If you see something like this going on, or notice that any other player is beginning to feel upset, bring it up to at least the Dungeon Master. D&D is about fun, and nobody should be spoiling the fun for someone else.
Now for some more rapid fire tips.
If a character's accent or manner of dialect changes, no it didn't.
Saying "what's the worst that can happen" is the most surefire way to assure that the worst will happen.
Have fun! Start bar fights. Trick the red dragon with a deck of illusions. Be an idiot. Dnd is about fun.
Don't edit/write on someone else's character sheet.
Don't mock other players.
ALL players should have their chance to shine. This goes just as well for the players and the dungeon master.
If you do something shitty because "it's just what my character would do", don't be surprised when your character gets beaten to death and thrown down a well.
Don't start genuine PvP. Sparring and fighting is ok, but PCs trying to kill each other won't go over well.
Stay off your phone at the table.
If the DM says no, the answer is no.
A tip for the DMs: your goal is to make a fun world for the characters to interact with. Your goal is not to make a world that the characters just kinda. Inhabit.
Don't let the rogue get you into a situation the fighter can't get you out of.
Everything has consequences. Yes, even that.
If it can't be solved by violence, you aren't using enough violence.
If all else fails, scatter.
Don't use D&D as a revenge fantasy against a player.
And that's all! I hope this was insightful and at least entertaining to read. I've got plenty of D&D stories and advice to share, so expect me to talk more. Til next time!
