Imagines/Scenarios

The premise was simple. There would be thirteen rooms that the Seventeen members would have to go through. Hidden in each room would be something of the members that they had to use the clues to find and get back. All thirteen would go through the puzzles together so they could help each other. But they don’t know what item of which member is hidden in what room. 

The Going staff approached you with the idea that you could be his something hidden. You were all for it but you needed to check with him before you gave the staff the go ahead. 

So you sat him down one night but knowing you couldn’t spill the beans of what the Going staff had planned, you referenced another similar fictional situation. The one in the fourth Harry Potter movie where the players have to save their one person from the lake with the mermaids. 

Here’s how fast he would figure it out. 

Seungcheol, Jeonghan, Wonwoo, Seungkwan

These boys would just listen to your story and then instantly be like “what did the Going staff ask you?” Like it would be intuitive to know that the Going staff were planning something. They’re just too smart like that. You would pout that they figured it out too quickly and tell them that you were trying to be sneaky. They’d chuckle and hug you close and praise you for your attempt but then tell you that they know you too well for you to be sneaky. 

They’d agree and of course would keep the knowledge to themselves and try to fake a reaction when they saw you in their specific room but you both would know. A tiny wink from him was all you needed to see to know that he would solve all the puzzles in the room in record time. 

Joshua, Jun, Woozi, Mingyu, Vernon, Minghao

These boys wouldn’t know right away when you told him the story. He’d listen and give his opinion about how he would feel if he were Harry and he had to save you. But since the filming wasn’t for another couple weeks, he had time to think about how it was a bit odd that you randomly decided to bring that up when you did. Like he would constantly think about it and wonder if his answer was good enough as your boyfriend. Would always wonder if there was a different answer or reaction to the that whole situation. Which would lead to wondering why you ever brought up the situation in the first place. 

It would take like a couple more days before he’d approach you with eyes wide and just exclaim, “Was that hypothetical not as hypothetical as I think it was?!” 

Hoshi, Dokyeom, Dino

These poor boys. The reference would go right over their heads. They would think NOTHING about it or how odd it was that you randomly asked the hypothetical questions. They would just think you were cute and smile in adoration how your mind would run on different tangents. You may even get extra cuddly cuddles that night because he had just the biggest heart eyes for you. 

Then came the actual filming and though it was a little odd you weren’t replying to his messages as much, he figured you were busy. The staff planned it so his room would be the last so you were sat in the box waiting for the thirteen of them to enter to figure out how to unlock the lock on your door. 

Did he know this? Absolutely not.

Would he ever find out? If the dominoes lined up correctly, he would never find out.

Sure, we’d heard of each other before but never met. That’s because I played my pieces perfectly. Pushing pawns forwards and keeping the Queen a mystery. It was simple, truly, listening carefully to everyone around me to find out he was single. Then it was only a matter of time until he was going to a place that I was going to be at as well. I made sure it would be the first night we met and the start of everything.

I made sure at that party to watch and listen to everything going on around me. An hour or so into the night, I found the perfect moment. 

He pulled himself away from his friends to go grab another drink at the bar. I had to carefully time out everything. He was known for his love of the chase but there had been stories of him getting bored if the chase was too intense, too calm, too bold, too boring.

Leaning against the bar, I waited to order as the bartender made his drink. As if by accident, I let my pinkie brush against his. 

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him glance over, gaging the distance I had put between him and me. Not far enough to say we were strangers but also not close enough to be obvious that I was interested in him. Just somewhere in between.

“Haven’t seen you around much lately.” He commented, facing forward again as if we were on some covert mission, which I most certainly was.

I looked over, studying him like I knew his secrets when I was dying to uncover every single one. “I’ve been busy with this and that.”

“Would you allow me to buy you a drink since you’ve been so busy with this and that? We can just put it on my tab." He offered and pulled out his black card, attempting to impress me with his wealth and status. He must’ve started a tab on a different card but was trying his best to impress me. 

I smiled and looked over the card, making sure to keep a intrigued look glossed over my face. The bartender placed his drink down on the table and I turned to the bartender.

“A Vodka Mojito, muddled.” I told him and pulled out my own black card, “And start a tab for me.” To make him think that I was staying for a while. 

“Right away, ma’am.” The bartender took the card and walked over to the register. 

“Hm.” Jeonghan hummed, slowly lowering his card and looking up and down my face, impressed.

“What?” I leaned my head on my fist, “Figured I didn’t have one myself?" The bartender stood behind the counter, listening but keeping his eyes and hands busy with my drink.

He shook his head, "It's a first."

A new piece of information flips open a new page in my mental notebook of him. "First time a woman rejected you?"

"Usually women reject me and turn away empty handed." Jeonghan corrected me, "This is the first time a woman has rejected me as an equal." 

I knew then I had him interested in my hook. But he was just looking. I needed him to bite before tugging and securing him. If I tugged too soon, I'd lose him in the dark waters.

"If you can find me again, maybe I'll let you buy me the second." I said, wrapping my hand around my drink and disappearing into the crowd. 

Little did he know I wasn’t going to stick around for that second drink. Spent an hour nursing my mojito and when it was nearly finished, I returned to the bar, closed my tab, and retreated to my home.

Over the next couple days, I heard whispers that Jeonghan was quite mystified by my disappearance. But just like I knew, he didn’t turn away. My disappearance only made him more curious. I heard from friends he was poking around, asking if I’d be at places and making comments about the cities I bounced around.

I knew we would have to meet again but it was all calculated. Timed so his obsession would grow instead of diminish. 

It was after a few months of cat and mouse did he finally bite the hook and got me alone. 

“I have not stopped thinking about you for months.” Jeonghan whispered lowly, “Would you care to share why you have not left my mind?”

I looked up amused, “Maybe I’m just that unforgettable.”

“I decide when people are unforgettable.” He pushed back, lifting his chin ever so slightly.

“Is that so?” I tilted my head to the side, “Then do share, when do you know people are unforgettable?” I asked, tempting him to take the bait.

Jeonghan smirked and I knew he thought he had me where he wanted me. Though I wanted to kiss away that smirk because it was actually me who had him where I wanted him. “Usually after a date or two.”

“Then, Yoon Jeonghan,” I crossed my arms over my chest, “Take me out on a date, or two.” 

His smirk turned into a smile and the dominos started cascading in a line. 

One date turned into two.

Then two dates became two months.

Two months flew to a year.

And suddenly we were together for a year and a half. 

It’s not like I was dishonest in our relationship. I told him all my secrets. I let him into my turbulent storm of emotions swirling in my mind. Everything I let him see was the truth. Everything except the timing. 

How I needed to meticulously pick and choose what I told him and when I told him. Letting him think he was peeling back the layers on his own when in reality, I was the one at the top, releasing my hold of the layers when I saw fit. 

And as the layers fell, so did the dominos. They fell, one by one, all in a perfect line. Crashing into each other with the most satisfying sounds. 

Until one was crashed into but didn’t fall, only teetered before stilling once more.

We were out eating dinner at a restaurant. It was one of the higher ends, something we both loved - the glam and glitz. 

Talking about our days and the latest gossip surrounding us and those around us. Then he looked up with a nostalgic look in his eyes.

“You ever think about it?” He asked, holding his fist under his chin.

“Think about what?” I picked up my wine glass, peering at him over the rim. 

He resumed cutting into his steak, “The night we first met.” 

My hand faltered for second but I quickly recovered before he saw, covering up the fear that he found out. “What about it?” I kept my voice calm and curious. 

I was not going to let a simple question reveal my web of schemes. 

“Just how the planets, fates, and all the stars aligned so perfectly that I met you that night.” He smiles softly, silently thanking the universe for aligning so. “I can’t imagine my life if I never met you that night. Like what if I simply passed by and not noticed how intriguing you were.” He shook his head, “Crazy.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat and chuckled lightly, “Yeah, crazy.” 

He carried on like normal, but his simple ‘what if’ question sent thousands spiraling in my mind. 

‘What if I told you none of it was accidental?’

‘What if I told you how nothing was going to stop me from having you?’

‘What if I told you how I laid the groundwork?’

What if I told you how, just like clockwork, the dominoes cascaded in a perfect line?’

‘What if I told you it was all by design?’

Yet one repeatedly came up until is was the only question I could think about.

‘What if I told you I’m a mastermind?’

‘What if…’

‘What if…’

The question kept me up hours after we had returned to my apartment. Long after we had finished the movie. 

I knew he knew something was off. It was evident in the way he cuddled me closer and kept a hand trailing up and down my arm, occasionally drawing shapes into my skin. 

But he never asked. He knew I would tell him what was bothering me when I was ready. But this, this was something I didn’t know if I’d ever be ready to tell him. 

This would be me admitting to every scheme I had ever executed. This would be me giving up my control to him and dear god, that was my worst fear.

For my whole life I was a schemer. It started on the playground when no one wanted to play with me as a little kid. I schemed like a criminal to make everyone love me and to make it seem so effortless. And everyone had fallen for the plot lines. Including him. 

So why did I feel the need to confess. Why now? And why with him?

The moon sat in the sky, brightly shining and keeping me company through the midnight hours. 

Jeonghan laid beside me, sleeping soundly and probably dreaming about me. 

Giving up on the sleep, I padded out to the living room and sat on the couch, legs crossed underneath me and hands folded in front of me. 

My mind was reeling with all the possible outcomes. This was not part of my perfect plan. I had always plotted the obstacles that I could encounter through each scheme. But never once did it occur to me that I would need to plan for the obstacles my own mind would throw at me. 

In the midst of my thoughts, Jeonghan stirred awake, missing the feeling of my warmth beside him. 

I barely noticed him exit the bedroom and search through the house for me. He was silent when he sat on the coffee table directly in front of me and moved like a ghost, enclosing my hands in his. 

It was there, in my living room, under the watchful midnight moon, that I spoke my fears to the one I swore would never know them. 

“I have to tell you something.” I said softly, staring only at his hands. I was afraid if I looked up and saw the hurt on his face, I would never forgive myself for making such a costly mistake. 

“You can tell me anything. I’m not going anywhere.” He said with such certainty I almost laughed.

I took a deep breath, the bubble of fear lodged in my throat and growing. “What I told you I’m a mastermind?”

He leaned forward on his thighs, “What do you mean?” There was no malice, only confusion. 

He hadn’t caught on yet.

“What if I told you that none of this was accidental?” I pushed on, squeezing my eyes shut and listening for the telltale gasp of realization and betrayal. “That the first night you saw me, nothing was going to stop and I knew I wanted you. That I laid the groundwork and watched the dominoes fall like clockwork. What if I told you you’re mine because it was all my design and that I’m the mastermind who planned it all.”

I rushed to finish and listened. I was listening for the gasp. I was waiting for the air to change to something I needed to cut with a knife. I was waiting for him to say he hated me.

But I heard nothing. The air didn’t change. The tight grip of his hands was still around my hands. He was still sitting in front of me.

Confused, I slowly raised my head. 

And there on his angelic face was a wide smirk. 

It hit me like a ton of bricks. 

He knew this entire time.

My mouth dropped open in surprise.

“I was wondering when you would realize.” He brought my intertwined hands up to his lips and kissed them. “Everyone said you were a mysterious one. They all said they thought you were some kind of spider, setting traps and creating seamless crimes. But I didn’t care.”

I searched his eyes for any sign that he was going to take my trophy and smash it to pieces. But instead, he polished it, held up it up to the light, and admired it.

“I saw every move you were making and I willingly fell for every single one.” He continued, “Because I finally found someone who was as equally Machiavellian as I was. Every move you made impressed me because you constantly surprised me. Going left when I assumed you’d go right. Pushing when I thought you’d pull.”

“You knew.” I whispered, stumped beyond belief.

He nodded with a smile. “I knew. You were going for checkmate and I wanted you to get there. I wanted to fall since the first night I met you. And I want to fall every day from now until forever. I’d get checkmated by you in every goddamn lifetime.” He confessed and the midnight stars were the witnesses.

A smile grew on my face as I untangled my hands and pulled him into a kiss. A kiss that could’ve moved mountains. When he pushed, I pulled. The both of us tempting the other to break away first. To be the one to relinquish control of the uncontrollable hurricane of schemes that we both loved so much. 

It was the night I knew he was mine for good. And the night I knew I was his all along. 

I was a mastermind.

So when you were woken up in the middle of the night by a phone call from Woozi, you’re slightly confused. 

“Hello?” You answered, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. 

“Hey.” Woozi’s voice is strained trying to get the one word out.

You knew he liked to work late so him being awake at this hour was not out of the ordinary. His voice, however, was. You’d fallen in love with the his smooth, calm voice. But it was not the voice you were hearing. 

“Is everything okay?” You sat up, now worried about where he was and how you were going to get to him the fastest. 

Woozi cleared his throat, “Uh… I…”

“Are you okay?” You specified your question, threw the covers off, and slipped on a hoodie on your way to the front door.

“No.” Woozi barely whispered into the phone and your feet stuttered as your heart shattered.

You had never heard him so broken before. Yes, he’d been downcasted on many occasions but something about his answer this time felt heavier than heavy.

Swiping your keys from where you threw them earlier, you shuffled on your shoes. “Where are you?”

You yanked the door open and your question was immediately answered. 

Woozi stood in front of your door with his phone still up to his ear. His shoulders were so slumped you swore you could see the 100 ton bag sitting on them. His eyes were glossy, barely holding back the turbulent storm brewing. 

He looked at you and bit his lip to keep it from quivering, to keep himself together. His arm fell to his side like a rock sinking to the bottom of the ocean. 

The entire way to your home, Woozi had been holding himself together. Not willing to let the emotions consume him. He didn’t want this to be his breaking point but something about the week just got to him and he needed somebody. He didn’t realize the person he needed was you until he looked up and saw he was already at your door. He told himself that if you didn’t pick up his call, he could handle this by himself and push through it.

But you picked up. And suddenly, you were like the rescue boat only a small distance away, shining a bright light that would be able to see him. The only thing he needed to do was call out. 

You didn’t know what was running through his mind, what kind of emotions were swirling around in that heart of his. But you did know he needed you when you saw the first tear trickle down his cheek and his chin start to shake.

“Help.” Was all his broken voice could push out and you could hear just how much pain he was in.

The second the word hit your ears, you chucked your keys and phone away and wrapped your arms around him. You squeezed him tightly hoping it was enough to make him feel put together if he was feeling like he was losing every part of himself. 

Your arms around him was like you’d secured the life tube under his arms and he could finally rest. Woozi buried his head into your shoulder and started to sob. 

You managed to scoot the two of you into your apartment and shut the door. But with the weight of him being held up almost solely by you, you couldn’t go much farther. In the middle of the night, Woozi’s cries were the only sound that could be heard. With each sniffle, each shaking inhale, your heart broke even more and your own tears trailed down.

The man who protected you from the demons of the world, from your own personal shadows, and even from the tiniest things that would make you mutter a soft ‘ouch,’ was now in your arms needing protection from his own demons. 

Woozi’s hands gripped the back of your hoodie for dear life, feeling like if he let go, he wouldn’t be able to find you again. You could feel his tears soak through but all you could focus on was him. 

You didn’t know how long you stood like that, your arms wrapped around him tightly and him fisting your hoodie in terror. Eventually, Woozi’s cries went quiet but when you pulled back slightly, tears were still streaming down his face. 

Though more tears replaced the ones you wiped away with your thumbs, you still kept your hands on his face, reminding him that you were there. 

“Let’s go to the couch.” You told him quietly, not wanting to break the blanket of silence that seemed to wrap around the two of you.

Woozi nodded once and let you lead him over. His feet dragged against the floor and the tears still fell but the storm that was once raging was now just a flood that needed draining. 

You sat on the couch and he sat next to you, laying his head on your chest. Automatically, you hand ran through his hair and his arms wrapped around your stomach, pulling you closer. 

For a long while, you stayed like that. Him resting against you and your hand running through his hair. 

Then he started mumbling something you couldn’t make out.

“What was that?” You ask softly, making sure to keep your voice calm.

“I can do this.” Woozi mumbled a little louder. “I’ve done this before. I can do it again.”

“Do what?” You scrunched your eyebrows together in confusion.

“I can get through this.” He said, keeping his eyes glued to the floor.

“Of course you can.” You agreed, “But you don’t have to do it alone. I’m right here.”

You felt Woozi’s lip quiver against your stomach and his silence was enough to tell you how hard he was trying to keep the tears inside.

“In the past you had to do it alone.” You told him, moving you hand to rub his back soothingly. “But now I’m right here. You don’t have to get through it alone.”

Woozi couldn’t help the fresh tears that flowed done his cheeks. He knew you were speaking the truth. He wasn’t alone anymore. But he was always used to being alone and having to work through emotions on his own that this was new territory, unfamiliar and albeit, a bit scary. 

“It’s okay.” You whispered and he squeezed you closer, “It’ll be okay. We’ll get through it. You will get through it.”

As he cried for the second time that night, he slowly realized that he did need you and that he would do anything to keep you this close to him. The way you somehow knew exactly what he needed to hear, the way you made him feel so safe and secure and the way he could feel your love without you saying more than ten words was enough for him to know that he undoubtedly loved you. 

His tears of confusion and anxiety turned into tears of relief. Relief that he didn’t have to always stand on his own. That he could lean on you if his legs could no longer bear the weight of his body. 

When the tears ceased, he pulled back and looked up at you. You still had worry on your face and you hated how red his eyes were from the tears.

“Thank you.” He muttered with a tiny smile.

“Are you okay?” You asked, wanting to make sure he wasn’t hiding anything.

Woozi nodded with a sniffle, “Life got a bit too much today but I’m okay now.”

“You don’t need to talk about anything?” You pressed your lips together in concern.

“You being here and picking up my call was enough.” He shook his head. 

“But you do know you can tell me anything, right?” You pushed back some hair that had fallen in front of his face.

“I know.” Woozi said, “And I will. But I think I just needed a good cry.”

You gave him a small smile, honestly happy that your relationship had progressed to being able to cry in front of each other. 

“Though I do need to tell you something.” Woozi readjusted so he sat level with you.

“What is it?” You hummed, curious to what he would say.

He looked into your eyes and grabbed your hand, “I love you.”

With those three words, your heart stopped and your breath got caught in your throat. You already knew that you loved him a couple months in, but you never said anything, unsure if he even remotely felt the same. But hearing the words was something you had only dreamed of and suddenly it was real. 

Just as Woozi was beginning to wonder if he had spoke the words too soon, a smile broke onto your face.

“Say it again.” You requested.

“I love you.” He obliged with a sparkle in his eyes. “I love you, (y/n).”

“And I love you.” You said the words back and Woozi was sure his heart would burst from how full it felt. 

He pulled you forward and kissed your lips with playful force. With the words out in the universe, his lips felt softer, they fit more perfectly, they felt more like home. You could feel him pouring his entire heart into the kiss and you poured just as much into him. 

With your kiss still on his lips, Woozi knew that from now on, he could truly handle any and every problem life would throw his way. 

“Say it again.” This time he requested it from you, his breath brushing over your lips.

“Hey.” He drags out the word and sits down next to you. “Have you possibly maybe seen my headphones anywhere?”

You glance at him and he’s got a sheepish smile like a child who is about to be told off for something they were told not to do.

Mingyu blinks a couple time and you chuckle, breaking under his gaze. “They’re in my brown purse.”

“I knew you had them!” He jumps up excitedly and rushes to where you keep your purses.

————————————————

The Seventeen members are going through rehearsals for their upcoming concert and you are sat watching them. Part way through the rehearsal, they are given a five minute break. Most of the members pull out their phones to quickly check their messages. You cross your arms and watch for Mingyu’s reaction, knowing full well he forgot where he put his phone.

Mingyu goes for his phone that he swore he put in his right pocket. But there’s nothing in the pocket for him to grab. He quickly digs in his left pocket wondering if it’s in there. 

Nope.

Now’s he’s panicking slightly. Where the heck did he leave his phone?

You cover your smile with your hand as you watch Mingyu stand on stage, patting his pants looking like he’s checking if his ass is still attached to his body (which it most definitely is).

Dokyeom notices Mingyu’s odd motions. “What are you doing?”

“I don’t remember where I put my phone.” Mingyu says, still patting down his pants even though there is no possibility of it being there.

“Of course you did.” Dokyeom chuckles which results in Mingyu shoving his shoulder away. 

Sighing heavily, Mingyu looks around, flexing his fingers and trying to remember where he put the damn thing. Then his eyes land on you. You wiggle your fingers in a mini wave. 

Using hand gestures, Mingyu asks if you have seen his phone anywhere.

You smack your forehead, giving him a ‘duh, of course I do’ look, before reaching into your bag and pulling out his phone. 

Mingyu closes his eyes in embarrassment, totally forgetting that he asked you to hang onto it because he didn’t want it to fall out of his pocket while dancing. 

“Hey, (y/n)’s got your phone.” Dokyeom states the obvious.

“Thanks, Dokyeom.” Mingyu gives his friend a small nod. 

Looking back at you, he mouths ‘sorry’ to you along with ‘I love you.’

You laugh at him but send him a small finger heart. 

————————————————

This time, you’re in the bathroom, curling your hair before you and Mingyu are heading out to a dinner with the other members. 

“(Y/n)!” Mingyu shouts from living room, “Have you seen my black socks with the tiny rose on the ankle?”

You scrunch up your face wondering why he wants those specific socks.

“They’re in the dryer!” You call back.

“Thanks!” Mingyu’s voice farther away, signaling he went to get them. 

A couple more minutes go by and then…

“(Y/n)! Do you know where my black belt is?”

You can’t help but laugh to yourself, wondering how he ever survived without you. 

“In the closet! Next to all your other belts!” 

“It’s not there!?” Mingyu shrieks.

Then you remember he had flung it across the room last night. 

“Check under the dining table.” You tell him and five seconds later..

“Found it!” 

You finish up with your hair and are putting on your shoes when Mingyu comes into the landing looking a bit confused.

“What’s up?” You ask, worried that something is really wrong.

He pouts, “I can’t find my chapstick. You know the one with the blue case and makes-“

You cut him off by holding the exact chapstick in front of his face. “You put it in my bag last night.”

Mingyu sighs and applies the chapstick. “What would I do without you?” He asks, handing it back to you.

“I was wondering the same thing.” You smile at him. “But it’s much better that I’m with you.”

Mingyu agrees, “I think I would’ve forgotten my head somewhere if you weren’t.”

You both laugh and step outside your apartment.

————————————————

‘Don’t panick.’ Mingyu tells himself. ‘It’s somewhere around here.’

‘Did you put in a drawer or something?’ Seungcheol asks in the group chat. 

‘I checked every single drawer!’ Mingyu replies, ‘What if she found it???’

Mingyu had bought an engagement ring for you a couple weeks ago. He is planning to propose in two days and what happens?

He forgets where he put the ring. He remembers he showed it to Minghao and Dokyeom when they came over the other night while you were out with your friends. But he can’t for the life of him remember where he put it after. 

‘I don’t think she found it.’ Wonwoo texts, ‘I would’ve heard about it if she did.’ Which is true as you were quite close with Wonwoo’s girlfriend. They would often lovingly refer to the two of you as the Gossip Girls. 

‘Minghao, Dokyeom, do you remember where I put it down?’ Mingyu hopes they can hear his desperation. 

‘How are we supposed to remember?’ Dokyeom shoots back and Mingyu’s stomach sinks even further. 

‘Fuck.’ Is all he can respond.

‘Don’t worry, Mingyu. Just keep looking, I’m sure you’ll find it.’ Seungcheol sends, using his reassuring leader voice.

Mingyu sighs and starts to look in the bedroom again. Opening and closing doors. Rummaging through the drawers. Even checking under the pillows and mattress corners incase he was idiotic enough to put that tiny box there.  

His heart starts to pound as he realizes that he’s going to have to ask you if you’ve seen it. You always seem to know where all of his stuff is. He doesn’t know how you know just that you do know. This was the one thing he told himself he wasn’t going to lose but with him being him, there was no escape.

Slowly, he pulls himself to the doorway with his heart pounding in his ears. 

You lay on the couch watching a TV show that’s had you hooked for weeks. 

“Babe…” Mingyu softly says, pulling you from your show.

“What’s up?” You ask cautiously, not sure what he’s going to say next.

“Have you… by chance…” Mingyu can’t bring himself to look at you so his eyes dart around the room: upwards, left, right. “Seen….” Back up, down, behind the TV. 

Tiny black box.

Behind the TV. 

Then he remembers how he shoved it behind the TV to keep it out of sight while he, Minghao, and Dokyeom unpacked the delivery food they ordered. He almost lets out a huge sigh of relief when he’s reminded that you’re in front of him. 

“Seen what, Mingyu?” You wait patiently for him to finish his sentence. 

“Seen… my…” Mingyu’s mind races to find a different thing. A lie. Anything besides the tiny box that he has now found. “Big blue sweater?” He spits out, hoping you won’t see through his lie.

You blink once, surprised by the request but knowing exactly where that specific sweater was forgotten. 

“Yeah, it’s right behind here.” You sit up and turn around to pick up the sweater from behind the couch. 

With your back turned, Mingyu takes the opportunity to scoop up the tiny box. He shoves it into his pocket just before you turn around holding the sweater he didn’t even know was there. 

“We should really hang that up.” You tell him and throw the sweater to him.

Mingyu catches it with ease and chuckles at the wrinkles settling into the fabric. “Eh, I never wear it outside so it’s fine.”

“Are you almost ready?” You ask him, knowing he was inside the room packing for the next day of busy schedules. But also knowing that when he finished you could cuddle with him. 

“Almost.” Mingyu nods, the tiny box in his pocket feeling like it weighs tons. “Just need to check a few more things and then I’ll be out.” 

You nod and readjust yourself on the couch, arms hugging a pillow to your chest. Mingyu’s eyes linger on your left hand and he can’t wait for the ring in his pocket to adorn your finger with a sparkle for everyone to see. 

————————————————

“Ah yes, smile just like that!” The photographer compliments you and your friends as they gather around you. “Very nice!”

The guest continue to file in and get pictures with you in your wedding dress. 

Suddenly, Seungkwan and Dino come running into the room, looking a bit panicked. 

“(Y/n).” Seungkwan says breathless, “Mingyu can’t find his tie. He said you would know where it is.”

“Do you?” Dino asks, hands on his waist and taking deep breaths.

“Did he check the small blue bag inside his garment bag?” You ask, “His lapels are in there too.”

“Anywhere else it might be?” Seungkwan wonders, “You know, just in case.” His face replicates the ‘you know, because Mingyu is a forgetful giant who probably moved things around without thinking about it’ feeling he has on the inside.

“Uhm,” You search your memory, “I know it’s in a small blue bag but it might be in his shoe box. Don’t ask me why.”

“Got it.” Seungkwan nods, “Garment bag or shoe box.” 

They start to head out when you call Dino back.

“Yeah?” Dino asks, looking back at you.

You nod your head to your tiny purse sitting the bench by him. “In my purse, there’s two blue capped chapsticks. Take one to Mingyu, I have a feeling he’s going to need it.”

Dino pulls the chapstick out of your purse and disappears from the room like a man on a mission. 

“He’s still forgetting where he put things, I see.” Mingyu’s mother walks in, smiling bright. 

When Seungkwan reaches Mingyu’s room, he relays the information and the boys immediately start searching the two places. 

“Blue bag! I found it!” Jeonghan yells and pulls out the bag from the garment bag.

“Oh thank god!” Mingyu groans and suddenly realizes his lips are quite chapped and getting uncomfortable. “Has anyone seen my chapstick anywhere?”

The members mumble ‘no’s or respond with a head shake. 

Then Dino saunters into the room, hand clenched around something.

“Hyung.” Dino calls out to Mingyu, “(y/n) said you would need this.” In his extended hand sits his favorite chapstick.

Mingyu takes the chapstick from Dino and a shiver of amazement runs up his spine. “She’s a genius. I swear.” Seungkwan comments, looking at the chapstick with wide eyes. 

Nodding, Mingyu applies it to his lips and stores the chapstick in his pocket for later. But his pants feel a bit too loose. He tries to remember where he put his belt. He knows he had it in his hand when he walked out of the changing room. But what did he do with it after that? 

“Where's my belt?!" Mingyu gasps.

The way Seungcheol had a third eye for when a member was about to get into a situation that might hurt them. Like when Vernon was riding the skateboard and Seungcheol stuck out a hand to keep him from running into the lighting structure. Like when Seventeen was playing a game and Jeonghan got pushed into so Seungcheol supported his back so they wouldn’t fall over. Like when they were filming Going Seventeen in the rice field and Seungkwan fell back into Seungcheol and he held him up so he wouldn’t fully fall into the water. 

Even if there was the possibility that Seungcheol could fall over as well, he always supported the members first. It was one of the things that made you fall for him, hard. And when it came to you, his third eye was alert as well, some members might argue it was more alert for you. Though rare, there were days when his third eye radar would shrink because of stress or exhaustion or just life to the point when he would be the one needing the protection and your own third eye would be alert.

Those days would start with something small that happened in your apartment that gave you the clue you needed to watch him closely. 

It was a Thursday and Seventeen had a photoshoot. You were invited the previous week and you never said no to such activities. 

With a tooth brush in your mouth, you were leaning your back against the wall beside the bathroom and watching Seungcheol roll out of bed, still very tired. He was sauntering over to the bathroom. With his eyes basically closed, he didn’t notice that he was off centered from the doorway. But you did. Just before his shoulder could collide with the doorframe, you grabbed his elbow and pulled him away. 

“What?” He mumbled, stumbling with sleep.

“Nothing.” You answered with the shake of your head. You knew it was a rare day and you were going to have to pay close attention him.

The morning followed without another hitch. Seungcheol woke up after his shower and seemed alert and excited for the day. Over breakfast, he talked about the plans for the day and how the members must be so excited to have a shoot for the magazine. 

On your way out, you glanced at his feet and saw that he wasn’t lifting them as high as he should have been. The two of you approached the door leading to the awaiting car. From the corner of your eye, you saw the corner of the rug near the door was flipped up at a weird angle. You reached out to grab his arm, just in case. 

The second you did, he tripped over the corner of the rug. It took all your strength to hold him up and he let out a yelp of surprise, his head stopping just before hitting the glass door. If you hadn’t caught him, he would’ve crashed headfirst into the door. 

“Has that carpet always been there?” He asked, standing up straight and looking down at the ground.

“Since I moved in.” You answered with a small smile, amused by his way of playing the trip off. 

“Huh.” He opened the door for you and looked back at the carpet once more before following you out. 

The car ride was fairly short, one of the shortest you had to take to a Seventeen schedule. You exited the car first and turned to wait for your boyfriend. His head was bent so he did see that the top of the door was lower than other cars he was used to. You reached in and tugged his arm lower just before he could bump his head. 

Seungcheol planted his feet on the ground and looked around with a deep breath. You let go of his arm when Jeonghan exited his own car with Joshua, Dokyeom, and Hoshi trailing behind him.

“Hey, Coups!” Jeonghan smiled and waved. “Hey, (y/n)!”

“Heyo.” You smiled back, walking alongside them towards the large building. 

You eyed a crack in the pavement and flinched to grab onto Seungcheol as he passed over it. Jeonghan saw you and caught your eye, giving you a weird look. You tried your best to convey that Seungcheol was off his game but you weren’t 100% sure Jeonghan understood.

“Where are the others?” Seungcheol wondered, taking in the quieter noise levels.

“Wonwoo, Mingyu, Seungkwan, and Woozi are getting ready.” Their manager pointed down a side hallway. “And Dino, Jun, The8, and Vernon are on their way.”

The boys walked down the hallway towards two rooms: one for makeup and the other for dressing. 

“I’ll go get changed quickly.” Seungcheol wrapped an arm around your waist and kissed your head.

You nodded, “I’ll be right here.”

You watched as he disappeared into the room, the door closing firmly behind him. Not wanting to be in the way of the magazine staff, you slipped into the make up room where Jeonghan was waiting for his turn.

“What was that earlier?” He slid up next to you, keeping his voice low.

“He’s a bit off today.” You said, “Nearly ran into the doorframe at home and tripped over a rug, almost hit his head.”

Jeonghan pursed his lips in confusion. “I wonder what’s got him off.”

“You’re not the only one.” You sighed.

One of the chairs became free and Jeonghan was waved over so your conversation halted. But Dokyeom easily replaced it with a different conversation. 

10 minutes later, the other four members arrived in the rooms and the noise level rose to the usual level. Seungcheol walked into the makeup room where you were engaged in deep conversation with Vernon about some new show you were both hooked on. 

“Yo, why were you late?”Seungcheol asked, raising an eyebrow in suspicion. 

“No, okay, hear me out.” Vernon said with sass and lifted a hand up in defense. “I was all set to go but then The8 hyung made me help him search for his hat that he swore I wore last.”

“Did you at least find the hat?” You wondered, smiling at the chaotic mess their dorm would’ve been in the morning.

The8 walked by at that moment, hatless, and grudgingly muttered, “Nope.”

Seungcheol clicked his tongue and gave a small shake of his head, “Shame.”

“S. Coups!” One of the make up stylists called for him loudly.

“Here!” Seungcheol answered.

You held out your hands for the jacket he was holding and he immediately handed over the deceivingly heavy garment. The weight caught you off guard and you almost dropped the whole thing.

As he walked away, you shamelessly checked him out. The black baggy pants paired with the white to black gradient sweater gave him a comfortable look. But you knew when he turned his charisma on, the outfit would exude confident power. Adding in the splattered black and white jacked in your hands and you knew the fans would go wild over the look. [Brownie points if you know the look!]

The others became busy, getting ready and preparing to turn into the models that they were. So, you took the time to eye your boyfriend from across the room. 

He just sat in the chair, eyes closed, sitting ever so still for the stylists to do their job. The stylist said something to him that you couldn’t hear and you watched as he fought back a smile but ultimately failed. Seeing his smile light up his face brought a smile to your own. You couldn’t see anything that would be weighing him down and cause him to be off his game, but then again, he was really good at hiding things behind a wall. He’d been doing it for years.

Seungcheol glanced in the mirror and saw you staring at him. He sent you a wink and loved the way that even though you rolled your eyes, the tiniest pink blushed your cheeks for a second. He pointed to the door where the members were filing out through and held up his other hand, signaling that he’d be done in five minutes.

You held up an ‘ok’ sign and waddled out with his heavy jacket still in your hands, wondering if he’d be able to do anything with it on. 

“What are you doing after this?” Mingyu asked, walking out with you.

You shrugged, “I have no idea. I thought this would take all day.”

“Yeah, it probably will but like it won’t take until morning.” Mingyu swung his arms at his sides like a child and turned around to walk backwards. “You want to come get dinner with us afterwards?” 

“Sure, sounds like fun.” You agreed and then wondered when the shoot would actually finish. 

“Great! There’s this really good grilled pork place like five minutes away.” He said, eyes bright with excitement. 

You nodded and listened but noticed the hallway was becoming slightly more crowded and Mingyu was still walking backwards. 

“I’m trying to convince the others that we should go there.” He rolled his eyes, “But they’re being stubborn.”

You were listening to Mingyu but distant voices creeped in calling for people to move out of the way.

“It would be great if you could help me convince them.” Mingyu gave you puppy eyes and you pushed him towards the wall just as a cart of equipment was rolled by you. 

“I can try but I think you’ll be able to convince them yourself.” You told him, smiling at his excitement. 

“Mingyu!” Their manager called for him with a wave.

Mingyu left your side and you entered a large area, one side coated in white paint from the ceiling onto the floor. A large crowd of people were milling around, some with camera equipment and some with clipboards. 

“(Y/n)!” Jun waved you over to where he stood with a few other members. “Help us pick out a playlist.” He turned a phone towards you.

You hummed in thought before just choosing a random popular hits playlist. The music played through the speakers and filled the room. 

“Nice music pick.” Seungcheol said, coming up next to you.

“Well, music is my life.” You handed him the jacket and he took it with ease.

Sliding it on, he looked around the room and counted the members he could see, mentally taking a head count. His head turned to the side and you watched his eyes scan the entire room. He moved to take a half step back but you grabbed his arm to keep him from moving too far.

Seungcheol’s head snapped down to you, worried that something was wrong. 

“Didn’t want you to trip.” You pointed down the floor where a cluster of cords sat close to his foot.

He looked down and then back up at you. “I didn’t even see them there.” 

“I know.” You nodded and squeezed his arm. “But I did.”

Leaning forward, he quickly kissed your forehead before stepping onto the set as the other members did the same. 

Not wanting to be in the way, you moved to the side and just enjoyed watching the members do their thing. 

It was supposed to be a fairly serious shoot but of course, with Seventeen’s collection of personalities, there were moments filled with fits of laughter. These were the moments that your third eye was on high alert.

Dokyeom was dancing around and making everyone laugh. He was spinning around, going across the length of the photozone. You watched as he started to dance backwards towards you. The others were in fits of laughter. As he got closer, you put your hands up to prevent him from leaving the photozone and possibly tripping over one of the millions of wires on the ground. He rebounded with ease and kept dancing, even pulling laughter from the staff.

A few minutes later, Hoshi started doing crazy gestures and poses. You caught Seungcheol’s eye and used facial expressions to tease him about what the members were doing. His focus was on you and how your face scrunched up into the cutest expressions that he could barely figure out. Hoshi was swinging his hat on his finger and your ears filled with the sound of laughter and clapping. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Hoshi’s hat go flying. Your reflexes immediately darted out your arm and you barely caught the white hat. 

Seungcheol’s eyes widened at your catch more surprised that you actually caught it than the fact that you felt the need to catch it. 

You smirked and Hoshi rushed up to you with apologies riding on the laughter that was spilling out of his mouth. 

They then split up for their unit shots. The waiting members decided to congregate near you. With so many people around you, your senses heightened for the dumb stuff they would do. 

You were listening to a conversation in front of you. Behind you was Dino and suddenly you felt him stumble backwards. So you rocked back on your feet and used your back to make sure he didn’t tumble down to the ground. 

“Sorry, (y/n).” He apologized.

But you just shook your head, “It’s fine.” 

You exhaled and looked around, starting to wonder how your boyfriend was able to do this on a daily basis. It did come a bit naturally to you but it wasn’t your normal and it was more tiring than you remembered. 

The performance team switched out with the hiphop team and Seungcheol made a bee-line for you. 

“Hi.” He smiled happily, wrapping you up from behind.

“Hello.” You leaned back into him, “Having fun?”

“I think too much.” He replied with a chuckle. 

You tilted your head up to him, “Why do you say that?”

He shrugged, swaying the both of you to the music, “I don’t know, just feels like it.”

“Don’t worry about it.” You squeezed his arms, “Just keep having fun.” 

Seungcheol rested his chin on your shoulder and pressed himself closer to you. 

The photoshoot finished with no problems and good vibes all around. Mingyu had succeeded in convincing everyone to go get dinner at the grilled pork place he told you about earlier. With all the staff trying to tear down the set equipment, you opted to wait outside in the parking lot while the boys changed. 

The sun was setting and creating blue and pink clouds. You were admiring the colors when the members started to file out of the building one by one. Well, you could hear them before they appeared at your side. You were sure their excitement could be heard from miles away sometimes. 

They came skipping out, excited to get some food into their systems. Seungcheol was following Wonwoo out of the building and, out of impulse, you glanced down at his feet. The tip of Seungcheol’s shoe got caught on lip of the door. 

Before your mind could think, your body jumped forward and caught Seungcheol’s arm before he could face plant onto the concrete. 

“Ya, Coups, you good?” Jeonghan asked, coming up behind him. 

Seungcheol straightened up but still held onto you. “Yeah. I’m good.”

“I’m starving!” Mingyu yelled from one of the cars, “Let’s go eat!” 

You intertwined your hand with Seungcheol’s and slid into a car with Hoshi, Joshua, and Seungkwan. In the backseat, you leaned your head on Seungcheol’s shoulder and he played with your hands. 

He sighed and muttered, “No one got into trouble today.”

“That’s a good thing.” You reminded him. 

“I know.” He said quickly, “It’s just odd.”

“Odd?” You glanced up at him and his eyebrows were scrunched together. 

Seungcheol’s lips pouted for a second, “Usually a couple members would cause trouble for themselves but none of them did this time.”

The car entered the restaurant’s parking lot and your mind replayed the moments when you stopped those moments from happening. The exact way Seungcheol was thinking about.

“I guess they were on good behavior today.” You commented before slipping out of the car.

“I guess so.” You heard him agree. 

Standing outside the car, you waited for him to exit and watched his head for the second time in the day. And for the second time in the day, you had to pull his arm down so he wouldn’t smack his head against the ceiling of the car. 

You giggled to yourself while he led you into the restaurant.

“What?” He questioned you with a very confused look.

You shook your head, “Nothing.”

“Which day?” He asks from next to you on the couch. “And what time?”

“Saturday for dinner, I think.” You lean into him, “If you’re busy, you don’t have to.”

He wraps an arm around you and pulls you closer. “I’ll ask my manager tomorrow. I forgot what we’re doing on Saturday.” Hoshi says, hoping you’re close enough that you can’t see his words are a half lie. He really forgot exactly what his schedule was on Saturday but that doesn’t matter, since he’s already decided to tell you he can’t make it.  

“Okay, just let me know.” You stretching up to give him a kiss on the cheek. “I already told them yes for me but that you were a maybe. Though they said they hope you can come, since it’s been a while since you came.”

“I blame my schedules.” Hoshi says, looking for a way to make the conversation lighter. He hates heavy conversations when he’s not prepared for them. “How dare they schedule themselves when I want to see your friends.” He jokes.

It brings a giggle out of you and he’s satisfied that you believe his lies. 

The next day, he asks his manager the schedule for Saturday and it turns out Seventeen doesn’t have any schedules planned for the evening. But the thought of hanging out with your friends makes him anxious and a bit insecure. So he texts you a lie.

“Hey, (y/n). I can’t make it on Saturday. We’ve got schedules and practice lined up all day.” His text reads. 

Your heart sinks a bit while reading it but it doesn’t effect you as much as it did when you first started dating him. You know he’s busy, like crazy busy. 

“That’s okay.” You type a reply, “We’ll miss you but maybe next time.” You keep optimistic though it has been months since he last was able to hang out with you and your friends. 

You definitely found it odd but it was easy to let it pass and focus on enjoying the times when you could hang out with him.

Hoshi isn’t happy with himself that he’s lying to you. You’re always so understanding and he hates that he’s using his job as a defense against you. He stares at your text, wondering when the next time would be.

“We’ve got practice on Saturday?” Seungkwan peeks over his shoulder to see what he’s looking at.

“Screw off, Seungkwan.” Hoshi quickly locks and puts away his phone. “Mind your own business.” He doesn’t mean to snap but with his mind and heart on edge, he can’t help it. Leaving a very confused Seungkwan, he walks away to stretch out for practice.

“What’s with him?” Minghao walks up to Seungkwan, both looking at Hoshi.

Seungkwan shrugs, not having the words to answer. 

Saturday comes and you haven’t seen Hoshi all day, true to his words of his busy schedule. Your friends had decided to go to Mirae’s house for the evening and so that’s where you head off too. 

Before you leave the house though, you send Hoshi a quick text just to let him know where you are. Since his schedule is always laid out with time stamps, it’s easy to figure where he is and gives you some peace of mind. But you don’t have such a schedule so you tell him these things and it helps him feel at ease. 

45 minutes later, you knock on Mirae’s door and your phone buzzes with a text. You look to see it’s Seungkwan but before you can read the preview of the message, the door opens and Jack is smiling widely at you.

“(Y/n)!” He pulls you in for a hug, “It’s been a while.”

“Since I saw you.” You emphasize ‘I’ because he missed the last gathering. “Where have you been?” You ask, walking inside the apartment. 

“Oh, you know. Here. There. Everywhere.” He says, “May have possibly even gone to jail.”

You gasp and slap him on the shoulder. “Jack!” 

“Do you think Mirae would’ve still let me in her house if i went to jail?” Jack asks.

“Depends on what you were in for.” Mirae chimes in without missing a beat.

You laugh and give her a quick hug before she’s back to getting out plates and silverware. “How have you been, Mirae?” 

“Good! I’m happy that we all could get together this time.” She says happily and hands you a stack of plates. “Though it would’ve been cool if Hoshi could’ve joined us.” 

You half-smiled, reminded of the fact that Hoshi wasn’t coming. “He had schedules today. But he wishes he was here.” You say to make her feel better even though he hadn’t exactly said those words. 

More people knock on the door and Jack runs excitedly to greet them, much like a puppy. 

You walk to your apartment with a small yawn. It’s not as late as you usually would return but Mirae and Jack need to get up early the next morning to visit his family so you called it an early night. Your watch reads 10:24 and you wonder if Hoshi is still out and about. You answered his text as you were leaving Mirae’s house but he hadn’t responded yet. 

Wondering where he could be, you unlock your door and make your way inside. The question you have in the forefront of your mind is instantly answered. 

Hoshi sits on the couch, asleep with his arms hugging a pillow to his chest, his head leaned back, and his mouth slightly agape. The TV is paused on the Netflix ‘Are you still watching?’ option. 

You set your stuff down and make your way over to him. He stirs when you sit down next to him on the couch. 

“You’re back?” He squints open his eyes and smacks his lips, ridding his mouth of its dryness. 

“Mm,” You nod, running a hand through his hair, “Mirae and Jack have an early morning tomorrow so we called it quits early.”

“How was it?” Hoshi sits up straighter, determined to give you attention. 

“It was fun.” You answer, settling into his side. “We had way too much food and a bit of wine with dinner which was really nice. And then we just chatted the night away.”

“Who all was there?” Hoshi starts playing with your hand.

“Mirae, Jack, Samantha, Taemin, Grace, and Yerin.” You list off the people and pull out your phone to check something. 

You still have a message notification and you swear you had answered all the messages. Opening the app, you see it’s from Seungkwan. 

“That sounds like the whole crew.” Hoshi comments, zoning out. 

You nod your head absentmindedly, reading Seungkwan’s text. 

“Hey, is Hoshi hyung with you? We can't find him and he’s not answering his phone.” Sent at 7:15.

You scrunch your eyebrows together. If the members had schedules and practices, they should be together. So why did Seungkwan ask you if Hoshi was with you. 

Tilting your phone towards Hoshi, you look up. “Why did Seungkwan ask me if I was with you today? Wasn’t he with you?”

Hoshi looks at the message and his heart jumps into his throat. 

“Uh…” He frantically tries to come up with an excuse, another lie to cover up the original one. “We got done early.”

“At 7?” You ask and he nods quickly. “Then why didn’t you join us at Mirae’s? We would’ve loved to have you join even if you were late.”

“I would’ve been way too late. It wasn’t worth it.” Hoshi explains, hoping you’ll stop pushing the topic.

But you are the type of person to keep pulling a thread once you’ve started. And you aren’t about to stop now. 

“You haven’t seen them in months. It would’ve been worth it even if it was only for a couple hours.” You pull away, sitting up and looking at him with confusion on your face.

“No, no. It would’ve been awkward and weird.” Hoshi shakes his head, “It’s fine. I’ll just go next time.”

You narrow your eyes at him. It’s only been recently that he’s been less and less excited to see your friends. And now it feels like he’s completely avoiding hanging out with them. 

“Next time?” You question. “You mean next time when we plan a gathering and Seventeen suddenly has schedules that somehow end early again?” 

He meets your gaze and you can see the gears turning in his head, trying to figure how to explain his way out. 

You sigh, turning sad as you say the words. “It feels like you’re trying to avoid them. Did they say something to you? Did something happen with one of them?” You ask, trying to figure what’s wrong.

“Not, not exactly.” Hoshi admits, hating himself for harboring the emotions for so long.

“Not exactly.” You repeat, running a hand through your hair. “Then what is it? Cause it really feels like you’re trying to avoid them.”

“I just, I don’t feel like I fit in.” He mutters quickly but clear enough for you to hear the words.

“What do you mean?” You tilt your head to the side. 

Hoshi breathes deeply and slides his hands down his thighs. “It was a few months ago when we met up with them at that Italian restaurant. Grace was telling a story about how she randomly saw one your old high school friends at the grocery store. then the others started chiming in with stories of their own. How they were either spotted by or they spotted someone they knew in the past.” Hoshi purses his lips, not looking at you and knowing your face is scrunched up trying to figure out his words. “Then the conversation switched to other things they do that I can’t. You know, like freely going to new restaurants, having quiet nights at movie theaters, and going on spontaneous adventures. And all the while they don’t have to worry about being mobbed, being photographed, or updating people with your whereabouts at all times.”

Your heart aches, listening to him long for something. “Hoshi…”

“And just the more we hung out, the more I realized how different my life is to theirs.” He continues, not hearing you. “I couldn’t relate to them. To their stories. I couldn’t offer my own random stories and even if I had a sort of similar situation it was always way too different to be acceptable to share. Grocery story run-ins? They’re fans who I don’t personally know or have mutual people to talk about the irony of it with. Trying to go anywhere or do anything? I have to have it planned at least a week in advanced and I have to have my manager and sometimes even extra security with me. It’s never spontaneous. It’s never normal.”

“Hoshi, it never bothered you before.” You rest a hand on his tense shoulder. “What changed?”

Hoshi runs his hands through his hair and stands up from the couch. “I just realized how not normal my life is. Every time I did share a ‘normal’ story from my life, sometimes you would have to really stretch to make it connect back to the conversation and for it to seem completely normal. But it never is normal. All the things that happen to me aren’t normal.”

“Is that bad?” You ask, standing now as well. “Normal is not always the coolest, or the best.” 

“You’re closest friends are normal, (y/n).” Hoshi lifts his hands at you, “Yet, your boyfriend is completely not normal.”

“I don’t like normal.” You say, getting frustrated with his beating around the bush.

“But you need normal.” His voice pitching up, desperate to make you see. “Your friends need normal. I can never be normal. None of my stories will ever be normal.”

“That doesn’t matter to them.” You run your hands over your face, “Normal or not, they really like you. They think you’re fun.”

“Fun or not, I will never be like them.” Hoshi lifts his shoulders up and then lets them drop. “I will never relate to them. I will never be normal.” He turns away slightly.

You drop your hands to your side, fully frustrated and confused with him. “Hoshi, what are you trying to say?” 

He whips around with sad eyes. “I don’t fit in.” 

You blink and set your jaw. “Who the fuck said I needed you to?” You ask, looking around the room. “Who said that I needed normal in my life? Who said you had to be normal?” 

Hoshi lowers his head and you can see tears glossing over his eyes. “I just don’t fit in. I don’t fit into the puzzle of normal.”

You grab his shoulders and force him to look at you. “I don’t care.” You emphasize every word, looking straight into his eyes. 

“I’m telling you, I don’t fit in.” Hoshi repeats before sniffling. “I just don’t fit in.”

“Don’t fit in with normal?” You ask and he nods. You inhale deeply as your heart cracks that he longs for the life of a non-celebrity. A life you didn’t ever think he would want this badly. “Come here.” You pull him into you and wrap your arms around his waist. 

Hoshi rests his forehead on your shoulder and loosely wraps his arms around your back. 

“Let me tell you what my normal is.” You say, feeling a few tears soak into your shirt and rubbing circles on his shirt. “My normal is having date nights inside a quiet apartment, looking out at the city lights. It is planning activities and adventures a week in advance which kind of gives me a sense of security that we’ll have tickets, or seats, or time for it all. It’s walking through a grocery store and getting recognized by people I don’t know at all.” You feel him shake as his tears fall. “But it’s also getting recognized by people I do know and haven’t seen in years. And then immediately going to watch a practice for an award show performance. It’s having cameras flashing and people screaming one moment to laughing with my friends about the stupid things I did in high school.” 

Hoshi’s arms tighten around you, bringing you closer. 

“My normal is not normal either.” You say, “My normal is somehow a mix between my friends’ normal and your normal. And you know what?” You ask pulling back to look at his tear stained face. Frowning, you wipe his tears away, still tucked in his arms. “I love my normal. I love this normal and I don’t want any other kind of normal.”

Hoshi looks into your eyes, searching for signs that you’re only saying it to make him feel better. But he can’t find any signs because you’re telling the truth.

“Is it hard sometimes?” You continue, catching the tears that still manage to slip down his cheeks. “I’ll be honest, yeah, it is. But knowing I’ve got someone who somewhat understands my normal helps. A lot.” You push the hair out of his face and sigh. “And I know it’s hard because your life is so different from my friends’ lives. But they’ve been hearing about my normal life for a while now. So they know your normal is not their normal. And they’re 100% cool with it. It’s part of the reason they like you so much.”

He glances up at you, wanting to know the exact reason.

“Because your life is so different, you bring a totally different perspective and my friends love hearing all sides of every conversation. Not just the controversial ones.” You explain, happy that his tears have stopped. “They’ve even asked me how to help you feel more comfortable. They’ve asked me how to match your normal so you don’t feel like you have to bend so far to relate to them.” 

“Really?” Hoshi asks quietly, his ears not believing what they’re hearing.

“Yeah.” You nod, “They have. They know how much you mean to me. They know our lives are different and slightly difficult at times and they wanted to make sure that you were comfortable with them. They didn’t want hanging out to be another difficulty for you.” 

“What kinds of questions did they ask you?” He sniffles, a bit ashamed that he’s asking but he’s got to know.

“Just how to make you more comfortable.” You say, “How to respond to the crazy incidents that happen to you. What questions were going too far. If there was any topics that were off limits. If they should try not to talk about your work and more about the fun stuff you do outside of work. Literally they wanted to make you as comfortable as they possibly could.”

Hoshi cracks a smile, “You have really great friends.”

“I know I do.” You smile at his compliment. “And they really miss seeing you. Sometimes I feel like they like you more than they like me.”

“That’s impossible.” He scoffs.

“It’s true.” You shrug, “The week after your album dropped, your phone was blowing up with texts from them. Then when we actually got time to hang out and we drank and they started asking you for dancing lessons because they loved the title track so much.”

Hoshi bites his lip to keep the laugh inside but with the evidence, he really can’t deny that it did seem like that at times. 

You grab his face in your hands and squish his cheeks, causing his lips to pucker. “I don’t need you to fit in and be their kind of normal. I love you and your normal. Got it?” 

He nods with his eyes closed, feeling better about himself. 

“Good.” You say contently before pecking his puckered lips. “And don’t you dare lie to me about your schedule ever again.” You threaten with his face still in your hands. 

“Sorry.” He pouts apologetically. 

“Gosh, I love you.” You chuckle and hug him tightly with your arms around his neck. 

“I love you too.” Hoshi sighs, relieved of the weight he’s been carrying for far too long. 

Pulling back slightly, you brush your hands through his hair and notice his tired eyes. “Bedtime?” You ask, nodding in the direction of your bedroom.

You watch in adoration while Mingyu is nearly tackled to the ground by the large amount of children scrambling for their present. 

When you return from outside the palace walls, you always bring a massive amount of toys and gadgets from the cities you visit. It’s a tradition that started a few years ago. But with the amount of money you’ve been earning from the city’s merchants, you could afford to buy the toys and such for the kids. Yes it means way less for you to spend on yourself but seeing the wide smiles on the kids faces and hearing their laughs echoing up and down the streets make it worth it. 

Looking over at Mingyu, you find he is barely keeping himself upright while the children climb and clamber over him. Stifling a laugh, you decide it’s probably best to help him out. 

“Alright, alright.” You called out to them. “One at a time, one at a time.” 

A few children look over and immediately jump off Mingyu, rushing to your side. 

“Can we choose our toy?” A girl in front asks. 

“Of course.” You reply and begin pointing and explaining all the gadgets on the table.

The smallest girl rests her hands on your knees, “I can’t see.” She pouts. 

You smile at her and lift her onto your lap for a better view.

She looks around the table while the other kids take their picks. 

“I got mine!” One of the boys shouts happily.

“Same here.” Another says.

“Wait!” The first girl holds up her hands and looks at the girl in your lap. “Laia hasn’t chosen yet.” 

“Laia, which toy would you like to take home?” You ask the girl in your lap.

She tilts her head to the side and continues to look over the table before her eyes land on the opposite side. “That one.” Laia says and reaches for the last pegasus figurine. 

As she reaches for it, her knee pushes against your stomach causing a sharp pain to flare. You suck in a breath and clench your teeth against the pain.

Suddenly, she’s lifted off your lap with the figurine in her hand. 

You breath a sigh of relief and gently rest a hand over the injury. 

“You chose the pegasus?” Mingyu settles Laia on his hip, “You know you have to give it a name now. Otherwise it won’t be able to find you again if it gets lost.” He tells her and her little eyes open wide. 

“Do I have to decide now?” She asks, her brain frantically searching for a name.

“It needs a name by the time the sun touches the top of the mountains in the morning.” Mingyu says and she nods, excited to have a mission from Mingyu.

He sets her on the ground and her group of friends go running off to play with their new toys.

“You okay?” Mingyu asks, looking at where your hand is resting against your stomach.

You nod, much of the pain now gone but you keep the hand there incases it opened up and started bleeding again. “She just nudged it. I’m fine.”

“Dr. Hong says he can check on you tonight." He tells you.

"Yeah, that would be best." You agree. "Will his office be open?"

"Doesn't matter. He said it'd be best if he came to you." Mingyu says. 

"Are you okay?" A voice asks from a few feet away.

Surprised, you and Mingyu look towards the new voice. The Crown Prince, Vernon, stands with his hands at his sides and a worried look on his face. Behind him are his two of his guards and his right hand man who's name you never can remember.

Immediately, you rise to your feet and give a small bow. Though it is not much more than tilting your head down with your hand still against your side. 

"Your Highness." Mingyu greets him once upright again.

"(y/n), are you okay?" Vernon asks you again. The worry is evident on his face but he still looks good. Handsome and strong. The leader that this city will one day need. 

You give him a small smile, "I'm fine. We ran into a bit of trouble on the way in but it is nothing you need to worry yourself with. It will heal in a couple days."

A small smile touches Vernon's lips. "Just like the olden days." He says, meeting your eyes, "You were always the one with the injury." 

You let out a tiny chuckle. "That is true." You take a deep breath and reset, remembering he is the crown prince. "I hope you have been fairing well." 

Vernon straightens himself and clasps his hands behind his back. "I have been. And I hope your trip was smooth sailing, except for the small incident."

You nod, lowering your gaze to keep the truth hidden. The truth that the incident wasn't small. It was quite major and more of an attack than an incident.

Mingyu clears his throat, "Would you like to come inside for some tea?" He asks, gesturing to the house that your group occupies when you're not traveling about. 

Vernon looks around, "That would be wonderful." He says and waits for Mingyu to the lead the way in.

You wait for them to pass you and bring up the rear. Glancing down, you pull your hand away slightly to check on the wound. A small dark red-brown spot marks your shirt and you mutter a curse.

"Everything okay?" Vernon asks, turning around to check on you. 

"Everything is fine." You tell him, not wanting him to worry about you. He had more important matters to think about even though you once were the closest of friends. "But I do hope Dr. Hong will join us soon."

"Wonwoo." Vernon turns to his right hand man.

'Wonwoo...' You think to yourself, 'I've got to remember that name.'

"Please tell Dr. Hong to hurry. I would like to make sure (y/n) is healthy." He instructs. Wonwoo nods and departs without another word.

Vernon continues entering the house and you follow soon after. Mingyu is in the kitchen helping the chef prepare a tea presentable for the crown prince. 

"Ah, please take a seat here." You motion towards the seat at the head of the table, where you normally sit. "The tea will be ready shortly, especially since Mingyu is helping." 

"Thank you for your hospitality." Vernon says and sits in the chair, his two guards standing obediently behind him. "But you don't have to speak so formally to me. You know I hate it when it comes from you."

"Sorry." You apologize, still standing. "Habits." 

Vernon nods, "It's okay." He slumps back in his chair comfortably, "So tell me about this incident you had."

"It wasn't that bad." You say as Mingyu walks in with a tray of snacks.

"That's what you say." He says, setting down the tray and sitting in a chair. "We were riding through the forest when some bandits jumped out of the trees with their swords drawn."

"How many bandits?" Vernon interjects, concern on his face.

"Just a few." You quickly say before Mingyu can spill the secret.

"How many is a few (y/n)?" Vernon looks at you with a challenging look saying not to test him.

You stare at the table, "I counted at least 10." You say with a sigh.

"Ten?!" Vernon exclaims, shooting forward. "You call that a few, (y/n)?"

"It was fine." You stare back, taken aback by his outburst. "We survived just fine and no one got killed."

"But you got injured." Vernon fires back and motions towards your stomach where your hand still sits.

"Yeah but it's the only injury out of all of my men." You say, "And I would hardly count this as an injury."

"If you can't move normally, it's an injury." Vernon states. "Were you going to report it?" He directs his attention to Mingyu.

Mingyu nods, "We were going to go to see the King tomorrow morning."

Before the conversation can continue, Wonwoo knocks on the door, opening it and walking in with Dr. Hong.

"Dr. Joshua." You tease your friend with a polite smile.

"(y/n), I understand the last trip ended with an injury." He says before turning and bowing in greeting to Vernon.

"Yes, unfortunately I had a run in with a bandit blade." You tell him. 

"Hmmm, well, let's go get you looked at before it can worsen." Joshua says and gestures for you to lead him to a room where he can examine you in private. 

"I'll be right back." You tell Vernon.

"We are talking more about what happened when you get back." Vernon says sternly, not happy that you would keep the whole truth from him. In all honesty, it hurt him. He thought you two were closer than that and he also cared about you too much. Not that you knew about that part though.

As you walk by, Mingyu looks at you with innocent eyes. Innocent eyes that say 'sorry for screwing that up.' You shake your head at him and lead Joshua up to your room. 

"So, you want to tell me what happened?" Joshua asks when you walk into your room.

"As my doctor or as my friend?" You wonder, sitting on the edge of your bed. 

Joshua sets his bag on the desk next to your bed. "As your doctor."

You scowl. 'Damn him for knowing I'd tell him more as my doctor than my friend.'

"We were riding back through the forest when bandits jumped out from behind the trees." You recall the events. "We were able to overtake them quite easily, though I did get sliced pretty badly."

"Alright, let's see how badly." Joshua lifts his hand into the air as a signal to begin.

You remove your shirt as he brings a chair up to your side. Removing the red stained bandage, you breath out heavily to steady yourself against the sensitive nerves. 

Joshua glances up at you, "You're going to need stitches." 

"Told you, sliced pretty badly." You say, trying to keep the disappointment out of your voice. 

You hadn't plan on staying int he city for too long but needing stitches means your stay has been extended by at least a week. 

"I'll try to be gentle but this is going to hurt." Joshua informs you, bringing a tube of numbing cream from his bag.

"I've had worse." You say, laying back with your arm over your head and taking deep breaths to calm your racing heart. 

Downstairs, Vernon sits sipping his tea while surrounded by the men of your group. Mingyu, Seungcheol, Seungkwan, Soonyoung, Jeonghan, Jihoon, Jun, Minghao, Chan, and Dokyeom. Vernon knew the whole group. He memorized all their names soon after you had started to lead them. He memorized their names for you. So you could be more comfortable. So they could all be more comfortable. And overtime, he became closer to some of them.

"Prince Vernon, you would've loved to see Castille." Seungkwan says excitedly. "With the mountains bordering one side and the clean air. It's perfect for you." 

Vernon smiles at the thought of leaving but it's not something he can do. "Maybe I will visit one day." He keeps the reality out of his voice.

"The people in Loring were obsessed with Lily's candy's." Soonyoung relays, "We almost had a stampede." 

"We'll have to ask her for more this time." Seungcheol comments, taking a sip from his cup.

"I'm sure she would be happy to hear that." Wonwoo says, thinking about the woman who makes the best sweet treats. 

From upstairs, they hear you yelp in pain and they all look towards the stairs. Vernon's hand clenches tightly. 

"Fuck!" You scream.

Vernon, Mingyu, and Jeonghan are on their feet in an instant. But Vernon doesn't move further, knowing it would be against the royal policies for him to go check on you. Mingyu and Jeonghan quickly make their way up the stairs while the others look on. 

Even with the numbing cream, the pain is intense. Probably the worst you've felt in years. You grit your teeth and clench your fists against the pain but it still drums throughout your entire body. 

"Dammit, Joshua." You say through your teeth. 

"Sorry, I know it hurts." Joshua apologizes and continues. "Only one more stitch, I promise."

"You okay?" Jeonghan asks and he and Mingyu burst into the room.

"Fine." You spit out. 

"Oh shit," Mingyu says and Jeonghan elbows him. "Sorry." 

Joshua quickly finishes and helps you sit up. Your eyes droop heavily with the sleep your body desperately needs. 

"Can one of you hold her up while I wrap it up?" Joshua looks over his shoulder at the two by the door. 

Jeonghan nods and pushes Mingyu forwards. Mingyu scowls at him before sitting next to you and keeping you upright. You lean your head against his shoulder and he wraps a friendly arm around you. 

Joshua places a piece of cloth over the wound before wrapping a long cloth around your torso. 

"Hold her for a second while I clean this up." Joshua instructs Mingyu and he cleans up the bloodied tissues and protective mat from the bed. 

"How long until it heals?" Mingyu asks.

"My guess is at least two weeks before I'm allowed to do anything normal." You say with your eyes closed. 

"Your guess is correct." Joshua stands up. "10 days until the stitches come out and another few days for your doctor's sanity." 

You roll your eyes though it's not that noticeable. "Great." 

“Alright, let’s get you into bed.” Mingyu says, noticing how your body is leaning further and further into his.

“But Vernon’s downstairs.” You mumble out. 

“We’ll inform him.” Jeonghan says, leaning against the wall. “Just get into bed and get some sleep. You have to see the king tomorrow morning.”

Mingyu and Joshua help you lay back onto the bed and place the covers over you. By the time they’ve backed away, you are fast asleep. Completely inside sleep world. 

“How long ago were you attacked?” Joshua asks as they leave your room.

“Yesterday.” Jeonghan answers. 

“Thankfully it was then, and not before.” Joshua says with relief. 

The three of them head back downstairs where the others sit in silence. Vernon staring at the table, lost in his thoughts and worrying about you. The approaching footsteps grabs all their attention.

“I stitched her wound up and she is sleeping now.” Joshua informs the group while mainly looking at Vernon. “She will most likely sleep through until the morning.”

“The night is approaching, your Highness.” Wonwoo says, not needing to look out the window to gage the darkening skies. “We should return to the palace.”

Vernon grits his teeth together but he knows Wonwoo speaks the truth. 

“You will visit the palace in the morning to report your incident?” Vernon questions Mingyu. 

Mingyu nods. “We will go as soon as (y/n) awakes.” 

“Very well.” Vernon stands up, “Thank you for the tea and the company. I bid you goodnight.” 

The others stand and Vernon makes his way out of the house and into the chill night with his men behind him. 

As they walk back to the palace, Vernon can’t help but look back at the house and worry for you. 

He’s not sure when it started but his admiration for your bravery to be a traveling merchant changed into care and worry for your safety. Then it became a desire to keep you by his side. But it was something he knows could never happen. He’s royalty and you are a free heart that would be terribly unhappy being stuck inside the city walls day in and day out. However, the heart is a weird thing, wanting the things it can’t have.

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The dining room is filled with the chatter of your men enjoying their breakfast meal. You carefully make your way into the room, your body still sore from the previous day.

“Oh hey, you’re awake.” Seungcheol waves you over. “Hungry?”

“Yeah., I could eat.” You sit in the chair and Mingyu slides your chair closer to the table. 

“How’s the stomach?” Jihoon asks with a nod.

“It’s better but will take some time to heal.” You answer, picking up some food from the trays spread on the table. 

“How long are we staying this time then?” Chan wonders, leaning forward.

“We’ll leave in two weeks time.” You say, “10 days for healing and a few more for the doctor’s sanity.” 

Chan jumps up from his seat, “If you need me, I’ll be at Minnie’s!” “He exclaims before running out the door. 

The whole group chuckles at the youngest. The only one with a significant other it seems. 

“I have a feeling we’ll be down a man soon.” Mingyu smiles. 

“That girl has him head over heels.” Jun says turning back towards the table. 

“The wandering life was never really suited for him.” You say, playing with your cup, “He was always meant to stay put and start a family.” 

“What needs to be done today?” Jeonghan asks, switching topics. 

You fold your hands together and rest them on the table. “Well, I need to go report the ambush to the king. The horses will need tending to and the extra toys need to be passed out to the sick and the newborns.” You list off the things that need to be done.

“We’ll take the horses.” Jun says, wrapping his arms around Minghao and Jihoon. 

Dokyeom raises his hand and waves it around, “I’ll go take the gifts!” 

“We’ll go with him.” Jeonghan says and Soonyoung nods in agreement. 

“Mingyu, Seungcheol, and I will go with you to the palace.” Seungkwan says.

“That was easy.” You nod, grateful how easy it is to come to conclusions with the group.

“Though Chan won’t be pulling his weight this time around.” Seungkwan scrunches his nose.

“Cut him some slack.” Seungcheol pats Seungkwan’s shoulder.

“Yeah, we’ve been gone nearly 10 months, it’s the longest he’s gone without seeing his girl.” You stick up for the youngest, knowing how hard it was for him to be apart from Minnie. “You all too. Take care of your duties for the day and then go see your families and friends.”

“What about the inventories for the next haul?” Minghao asks. 

You shake your head, “I’ll take care of it all. You all deserve a break. It’s been a long time since we’ve been back. Enjoy the time you have.”

A chorus of cheers erupts from around the table. 

You smile wide at their excitement, “So eat up and do your duties diligently before having fun.” You raise your cup.

They all yell happily and raise their cups in cheers. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You sure you’re okay to go?” Mingyu whispers into your ear as you enter the palace.

You take a deep breath, “I have to be.”

Two guards lead your small group to the throne room where the king awaits your presence. The double doors open and you walk into the massive room. At the opposite end from you, the king sits on his elevated throne with a stoic look on his face. Standing next to him is Vernon. 

He studies you as you walk forward, looking for any indication that you are hurting worse than yesterday. 

You stop at the set of guards standing a few feet in front of the throne steps and bow. The others follow suit, showing the utmost respect to the king.

“(Y/n).” The king says, happy to see you again after so many months.

“Your majesty.” You say before straightening up. 

“Vernon tells me you bring news?” He inquires, gesturing towards his son.

“I do.” You begin. “On our way into the city, we ran into some bandits. Actually, we were attacked by bandits.” 

The king leans forward in his chair, concerned. “How many?”

“Ten, sir.” You keep your head tall and your shoulders relaxed.

“Did they take anything?” He asks.

“No sir. We were able to take them down easily.” You say.

“Did you happen to see any signs and markings on them?” The king continues to question you.

You glance at Vernon. “They had the symbols of the Populars on their weapons.” 

The guards near you stiffen at the name. 

Vernon’s hand involuntarily ball into tight fists, filled with worry that it was the Populars you met. He tries desperately to meet your gaze but you don’t give into the burning stare.

The king seems unfazed, covering his emotions as a king should. “How far out were you when they attacked?” 

“We were a day out.” You focus on enunciating every word properly and politely. 

“Populars so close to our city is not good.” The king mutters before looking back at you, “Anything else to report?”

“No, your Majesty.” You shake your head.

“Then you are dismissed.” The king waves his hand.

You bow in a goodbye and then lead your men out of the throne room. 

As soon as you exit the room, Mingyu lets out a long breath. 

“It’s bad, isn’t it?” He wonders.

“Yeah.” You confirm. “It’s going to be a lot harder to come or go now.” 

“Will we take less trips?” Seungkwan asks.

“I don’t know what will happen.” You tell him, “But I know if we stop taking trips all together, the city will suffer.”

“(Y/n)!” Vernon comes running up behind you. 

He reaches you nearly out of breath.

“Your Highness?” You worry at how he’s bent over and breathing heavily.

Vernon rises to full height and takes a couple deep breaths to steady his racing heart. “Could I speak to you alone for a moment?” He asks.

“Uh, yes. Of course.” You glance at the three men who came with you, “You guys are free to go.” 

They nod and Seungkwan raises his eyebrows at you suggestively as he passes you. It confuses you but you brush it off and follow Vernon through the palace. 

After a few turns, he finally speaks up. 

“You didn’t tell me they were Populars.” He doesn’t turn to look at you. 

“I didn’t.” You confirm.

“Why not?” He questions. 

“Because it isn’t something for you to worry about.” You say, looking straight ahead.

He stops abruptly, “Not something for me to worry about? How is it not something I should worry about?” 

You turn towards him. “It is your father who deals with these matters. He has the ability and resources to take care of the threat. You don’t yet need to worry about it.” 

“But they’re targeting you and your group.” Vernon gestures at you. “You were the one attacked so I think I should definitely worry about it.”

“You would worry about me?” You ask, catching on to his words.

“Of, of course I would.” He stutters, “You’re my best friend and all.”

Your heart sinks slightly at his words, “Yeah, best friends.” 

Vernon curses at himself for blurting out such words. But they’re out in the open and it may be for the better. The option of him and you just not being possible. 

“I, uh, I can ask my father to send guards out with you to help with protection.” Vernon offers, resuming the walk. 

“There’s no need.” You say, wringing your hands together. “We’ll be fine. We’ve all had enough training.” 

“Are you sure?” Vernon asks, “It wouldn’t be hard to convince him that it is necessary.”

You smile softly at him, “No, it’s okay. Don’t bother him with that stuff. He’s already got his hands full.”

“That stuff would be his son’s worry and it is something he can definitely add to his plate.” Vernon becomes stubborn. “Actually, you know what. No. If I say you need guards, you will have the guards assigned to you.”

“Vernon, stop.” You grow increasingly annoyed at him. 

“No, I worry about you a lot and I would worry less if I knew you had royal guards protecting you.” Vernon says with finality.

But you are taking none of it. “Vernon, do not force those guards into the life we live. Do you not realize how hard it is?” 

Vernon sets his shoulders back. “They made a promise to serve the royal family. If we say they need to protect you, then that’s what they’ll do.” 

You stop walking and it takes him a few steps to realize it. “How many of your guards do not have a close loved one?” 

“What do you mean?” Vernon scrunches his eyebrows together, confused.

You look down at the floor, unhappy that you have to explain this to him out of all people. “If you assign us guards, their families, their loved ones, girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands, and wives will not see them for months at a time. And when we do return, they will only get a few days together.” You cross your arms over your chest, “This last time we were gone for ten months. And with the threat of the Populars, it’s going to be harder getting in and out of the city which means less frequent trips back home. The guards will be gone for too long. Vernon, there’s a reason we’re the only group that does this. There’s a reason I chose the people in my group.”

“You’ve got one in a relationship.” Vernon counters and I roll my eyes.

“He was single when he joined.” You say, “But he told me he could handle the long trips. I believed him and at first, he could handle it. However, I will have to let him go soon. Every trip we take, it gets harder and harder for him to stay strong. This last trip was extremely hard for him.”

“Then I will only assign you the single ones.” Vernon concludes, as if the answer is that easy.

“No.” You shake your head. “I will not allow it.” 

“As your Crown Prince, it will be done as I say.” Vernon says, clenching his jaw in frustration that you won’t just let him protect you. 

“If you’re so goddamn worried about me, then why don’t you come with me?” You throw your hands up into the air. 

“Why don’t you stay with me?” Vernon stares at you with nervous but determined eyes. He doesn’t want to ask you like this but this seems to be the only opportunity that he has.

You blink at him, mouth agape. 

“You know I can’t do that.” You say sadly and tears begin to burn behind your eyes. 

Vernon looks down at the floor. “And I can’t do that either.” The sadness in his voice breaks your heart and it takes everything in you not to cry.

You clear your throat and try to keep your voice as steady as possible. “Thank you for your offer, but it will not be necessary, Your Highness.” You look at him and hate the way he looks, sad and worried for you. “My men and I will rest for nine more nights before we take our leave. Have a pleasant day.” You bow further than you should with your injury but you don’t care.

You turn to leave and Vernon reaches out for you but stops himself from going further. He immediately regrets it when you round the corner and disappear.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reaching the gate of the old abandoned garden, you grip the letter tighter in your hand. 

The letter from Vernon, the first line of communication you’ve had in eight days, that reads:

“(Y/n), 

I do not know if you will read this with the way we left things.

But I would like to see you just once more before you leave tomorrow.

I’ll be waiting for you at the place we always meet.

I will be there an hour past midnight.

Your best friend,

Vernon.”

You don’t really know if it was your heart or your head that led you come here. But here you are, wondering why he would want to meet. There was no reason to really talk again. You both said what you wanted to say and yet you had realized that no matter how much you cared for him, how much you wondered what it would be like to be his, your lives were much too different for it to ever work.

But he is, after all, your best friend. You don’t want to leave without at least seeing him one last time, considering you may spend another 10 months away from the city.

Pushing open the gate, you walk through the dark and eery garden, past the overgrown bushes and climbing vines that trap any and everything in their path. In the center of the garden is the once vibrant fountain that now sits dry and empty. The place where Vernon waits, sitting on a bench facing the fountain with his back to you. 

Quietly, you sit down next to him on the bench and like always, he doesn’t flinch, almost like he knew exactly when you would be coming.

“You came.” Vernon sighs, rubbing his hands together. 

You inhale with a sad, sinking feeling growing in your chest. “Of course I did. Who knows how long I’ll be gone for this time. And the Crown Prince asked me to come.”

Vernon lets out a chuckle but it rings with bitterness. “I hate it when you refer to me as the Crown Prince. I hate it when you use titles and formality around me. And yet it’s only when you use it do I feel it. We could be around any royal official or city folk and I only hate it when you use the formality.” 

“Why?” Your tongue asks before your mind can filter. 

“Because you’re you.” He says and you don’t have time to take offense before he continues. “For our entire lives, you always had the bigger dreams, the bigger goals, the bigger plans for you life. As you grew up, you always wanted to go further and further beyond the castle walls while the distance I could go got smaller and smaller every year.” Vernon leans back on his hands, looking up the sky. “You always seemed like the bigger person. The more powerful person. So whenever you use formality with me, it’s just a reminder of how small I truly am compared to you. How little I’ve seen to the worlds you’ve visited.” 

You look down sadly, now understanding the root of his hatred of formality between the two of you. “You used to dream as big as me, if not bigger, if I remember correctly.”

Vernon scoffs, “I don’t remember that.”

“I do.” You look at the fountain, remembering when it worked and was full of lively, moving water much like the two of you in the past. “You’re the reason I started to dream so big. You were always talking about going on big adventures. Going to slay dragons out east. Going to capture a troll. To ride the giant eagles in the west and even to bring one home. But then you started to dream not so big. I remember being so confused and trying everything to get you to dream big again. So I figured if I started to dream big for you, you’d start to dream big again.” You sigh sadly, remembering how hard you tried to get him to return to the adventure loving boy he was. “But you never dreamed big again.” You leaned forward, gripping the edge of the bench. “Over time, I realized why, of course. I would’ve been stupid not to see it. You being the crown prince put limits on your life. So I decided, I would live out the big dreams for us, for you. But I see now that may have backfired.”

“You dreaming so big made me feel smaller.” Vernon comments with a sigh.

“More than that. Living out the big dreams alone is miserable. We dreamed them together and yet only I was living them. You needed to be there.” You finally look over at him and find him looking at you.

“I’m sorry.” Vernon looks away quickly. “For leaving you alone to live out the big dreams.”

You grab his arm, “Come with us this time. With me. Just once. Can’t we live out one big dream together?” 

He rests his hand on top of yours with the intent to pull it off but he can’t do it. 

“Vernon, come on. You’ve always wanted to runaway just once. So why not now?” You start pleading with him, your heart becoming desperate for him. 

“I have always wanted to.” He agrees but pulls your hand off his arm, “But I cannot. I can never do it. Not now. Not in three months. Not in a hundred years.” He stands and walks to the empty fountain. “I will always want to. Especially if it were with you. But my life ties me here in an unbreakable tie.”

You look at his back, a tear falling down your cheek as your heart breaks into pieces. The one you’ve wanted to be with for years turning his back on you. And the dreams he had as a child.

You stand and wipe at your cheeks, wanting to leave and realizing maybe it wasn’t the best idea to see him one last time. “I will return in a few months.” You try to steady your shaking voice. “Goodbye, Vernon.”

Vernon doesn’t move but his voice travels through the air like a wisp of smoke. “I’ll wait for your return, (y/n).” 

With tears falling from your eyes, you walk away from the fountain, from the garden, and from him. 

You return to the house and make your way up to your room, slamming the door in the process. Unknown to you, Mingyu and Seungcheol knew you had gone out and waited up for you. Mingyu, seeing you crying as you were, tries to follow you but Seungcheol holds him back. 

Throughout the night, the tears never cease. You toss and turn all night trying to sleep so you could be ready to travel but your mind keep replaying Vernon’s voice. The sadness, the bitterness, and the longing lace through it. It echoes in your mind over and over. To the point where it sounds like he is right next to you, in your room, saying the words into your ears. 

By the time the sun rises, you have cried out all your tears and your eyes are red and sting painfully. But today is the day you need to leave. A traveling merchant cannot be idle for too long. 

With a delicate and hurting heart, you drag yourself out of bed, into clothes, and down the stairs for some food before you head out. Your men are much quieter than normal but you don’t take notice. 

Sitting down, you start filling your plate with food. 

Jihoon clears his throat, “Uhm, Chan isn’t in his room.” 

“Oh?” You numbly look at your plate and wait for them to explain further.

“He’s been gone since the early morning and there was only this letter on his bed when I went in this morning.” Seungkwan slides the letter over to you. 

Defeated, you drag the letter over to you and open it. 

“The time has come.” Is all that is written on the piece of paper. 

You knew it was coming, the day he would leave your group to stay in the city. You just didn’t expect he’d do it like this, so suddenly, without warning. 

You toss the paper into the middle of the table and slide your chair back. “He’s not coming. Good thing I didn’t put him on wagon duty this time.” You stand up and look around the table with lifeless eyes. “We leave in ten minutes.”

“(Y/n).” Mingyu calls out to you but you ignore him, grabbing your sword and heading outside to ready your horse. 

As you put the bit in your horse’s mouth, your hands still with the realization that going out this time is more dangerous than any other time because of the Populars. The weight of your sword weighs you down more with the thought of fighting more. Your horse nudges her nose into your shoulder as if knowing something is wrong. 

She shakes you out of your thoughts. “I’m okay. I’m alright.” You reassure her with pets to her face and neck. 

A few minutes later, your group files out of the house and each unties their horse with their swords strapped to their belts. The wagon is all packed with new products to sell and waiting to be filled with new toys. 

“Let’s mount.” Seungcheol yells and all the men hoist themselves up onto their saddles. 

You look down the road, childishly wishing that Vernon would come running towards you. With a sigh, you know it will not happen so you pull yourself onto your saddle. You grip the reins tightly and get your horse to walk towards the gates. Your group follows you, the clack of the horses feet against the pavement acting as your background music and announcing to the city that you are taking your leave. A few people stick their heads out their windows and doors to wave goodbye. You don’t have the energy to acknowledge them so you look only at the road in front of you. The road that leads out. 

As you reach the inner city gates, you pause. You turn in your saddle and look towards the castle in the center of the city. You’re not sure if you’re imagining it but you swear you can see him standing on the balcony, watching you and your heart breaks even further. 

Before a tear can fall, you turn back around and nudge your horse forward. Away from him. 

Vernon can barely see your group, being so far away makes you look like tiny game pieces on a giant game board. But he knows it’s you. There’s no way he wouldn’t recognize you. He watches as you slowly make your way to the gate. His heart stops when he sees you stop at the gate and turn around. Even though it’s far away, it feels like you’re looking right at him, straight into his soul. And he hates the feeling he gets. He hates watching you leave when he so desperately wants to be leaving with you, getting far away from his responsibilities, far away from his life. 

But like always, you turn around and continue forward. Leaving him in the palace, alone and trapped. Angry and sad, he slams his fist into the railing, not caring how he may hurt himself. 

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Wonwoo wonders, playing with your hand.

You nod, “I think so. And if it ends up being too much, I can always come back here.” 

“That’s true.” Wonwoo smiles softly, “Jaeyoon and Minwoo can always bring you back in here in a split second.” 

You smile back even though your heart is beating hard. You haven’t really left his side or any of the members' side since the incident a few months ago. The incident that left you terrified of facing anyone in public alone. There wasn’t any physical harm but the rough touches and close proximity was too much. Not to mention the words that were said to you. 

Since then, you’ve stayed in the shadows. Never really going out unless Wonwoo was with you and if Wonwoo needed to do something away from you, another member would dutifully step in and stick to your side, giving you comfort in anyway until Wonwoo could return.

But as time went on, you started to miss the feeling of being able to properly interact with fans and not needing to be with someone just for your heart to beat normally. You miss the moments in the past when you could appear on stage at concerts as a surprise and interact and play with the fans as a fan favorite. 

After many late night talks, you and Wonwoo figured a concert might be a good place to test your boundaries. With the large amount of security, the orderly-ness of seats, and the easy access to a private space if things got out of hand.

You have all the reassurances but it still has your heart going crazy with worry and anxiety. However, you know, if you don't try now, you might never be able to do what you want. 

So here you are, just before the concert start, building up the last bit of courage you need to let go of Wonwoo’s hand and make your way to your seat.

“If you need me, you know where to find me.” Wonwoo says quietly before giving you a quick kiss. “But I know you can do this. And I’m proud of you for taking this first step.”

“Me too.” You suck in a breath and let his hand go. “I’ll see you after the concert.”

The other members wave and give you large smiles of encouragement as you leave the waiting room, gripping Jaeyoon’s arm and Minwoo behind you. 

Your seats have a decent view of the stage and are tucked away so fan interactions are kept to a minimum. Of course, a few fans noticed but they are unable to do anything but point and snap a few pictures. After a stern look from both Jaeyoon and Minwoo, the attention on you stops immediately.

You can feel the energy buzzing all around you, Carats excitedly waiting to see their favorite idols. The concert starts and the music does an excellent job in drowning out your heartbeat pounding in your ears. There are a couple moments when you want to give up. But Jaeyoon and Minwoo simply grab your hands, give reassuring squeezes and words of encouragement. You end up gripping their hands pretty tightly but if it hurts, they don’t say so. 

The final ments of the night come around and you listen intently to each and every member talk about their feelings for the night and the concert prep.

“Like the other members said, the preparation for this concert was stressful.” Wonwoo says, looking around the stadium. “But being able to hear Carats sing along and to feel the energy that Carats have makes all the preparation stress worth it. It’s been a while since we last met but seeing you tonight gives me the energy to keep going for the next time we get to sing and dance together.” Wonwoo looks left and right at his members. “I think I have to thank my members more than ever tonight. The past few months have been really hard for me and (y/n). The Seventeen members have been so supportive and helpful to both of us that I don’t think she or I would have been able to manage if it weren’t for them.”

When the words hit your ears, tears start to line your eyes with the memories of the difficult days when the members were there to comfort you whole-heartedly. Dokyeom and Seungkwan look up to the sky, attempting to keep their own tears at bay. Seungcheol rests a hand on Wonwoo’s back in comfort and the others look on with solemn expressions. The crowd is cooing and offering cheers of encouragement.

“So really, thank you to my members.” Wonwoo continues, his hand gripping his towel to keep somewhat of a calm exterior.  “I also have a wish that I want to express.”

“What’s your wish?” Jeonghan asks and everyone looks to Wonwoo.

Wonwoo takes a deep breath, and even though he can’t definitely see you, he looks at the spot where he knows you are sitting. “Recently, I’ve been missing the moments when we could stand next to each other and smile and laugh freely with the members and Carats. So I really wish that one day, you and I will be able to stand together on a stage together. I know it will take a long time but someday, in the future, I want to be able to see that smile again.”

Seungkwan clears his throat, “That’s a good wish. I also wish for that.”

“Me too.” Woozi nods his head in agreement. 

The other members nod in agreement. 

You have known that it’s been on his mind, the longing for the past, and it tears you up that you can’t give it to him yet. But you also want the same wish to come true so the motivation has never died down. 

Later that night, after the concert and the following V-Live, you are all back in the dorm, many of the members exhausted but still high on the energy they received from Carats. So you’re all sitting around talking and trying to wind down from the night.

It’s then that you make a decision.

“Seungcheol,” You grab his attention and he looks at you with wide, attentive eyes. “Can you help me with something?”

“Sure, what is it?” He asks, fully turning to you.

You take a deep breath, not quite believing you can even get the words out. “Tomorrow, I, uh, I want to get on stage.” 

“EH?” Seungcheol’s surprise escapes him faster than he can think. “That came out wrong.”

You smile at his surprise, “I know it’s sudden but I really want to. But I don’t think I can do it alone. And I think if I go up with Wonwoo, I'll revert and won’t actually stand on my own.”

“So you want me to help you get up on stage first.” Seungcheol pieces the parts together like the leader he is. 

You nod. 

“I can help but can I ask why now?” He wonders with care in his voice.

“Because I feel like if I don’t do it now, I will never ever be able to do it. It’s Wonwoo’s wish but it’s also my wish. And I want to make my own wish come true. Plus hearing Wonwoo admit it out loud to fans, it makes it more of a concrete thing than just a dream that could disappear.” You explain, both knowing that it’s kind of big deal when Wonwoo admits things in front of Carats being the private person he is. 

“Okay, so how about this?” Seungcheol nods and starts explaining a plan. A plan that somehow is unheard by any of the remaining members in the living room.

The second day of the concert and the preparations go similarly to the day before only with more silliness between the members. Less nerves about how the night will go. 

“Tonight, same plan?” Wonwoo asks during one of their breaks.

You nod, “Same plan. Yesterday went fine so I want to try again.”

Wonwoo smiles brightly, happy to know that you are taking steps in the right direction. “Tonight will be awesome. I’ll make sure of it.”

“I’ll be watching you the whole time. So don’t mess up.” You joke with a small nose scrunch. 

“Like I ever mess up.” Wonwoo laughs with his head thrown back and for a moment, everything is normal. Recently there have been more and more moments like this and these moments are what give you extra confidence that you can fulfill his wish sooner than he thinks. 

Again the concert goes as smoothly as yesterday. Possibly even better with the way the boys are relaxed and a bit more silly than normal which in turn makes the energy from Carats even crazier. 

While they are singing the first two songs of the encore set, Jaeyoon and Minwoo lead you back stage towards the extended stage, away from where the members will be sitting while giving their final ments. 

Jaeyoon hands your ear pieces over and they feel odd in your hands. It’s been so long since you’ve had them in your hand or your ears that it feels very alien. But they must go in if you have any chance of hearing any of the members or your cue from Seungcheol over the cheers that will definitely consume the stadium. 

Tonight, Seungcheol made sure he is the last to give his final ment. Coincidentally, Wonwoo ends up going first. Which makes the surprise almost better, in Seungcheol’s mind.

You wait just behind the curtains leading to the stairs up to the stage, sitting on a stool as the members start their ending ments. Jaeyoon and Minwoo are still with you and will stay with you until Seungcheol is by your side. 

Starting with Wonwoo all the way to Seungcheol, each go through their feelings, much of which are similar to yesterday’s. Wonwoo ends up expressing thanks to the members and Carats for supporting and helping both him and you. You nod in silent agreement, taking a mental note to thank Carats when you get up on the stage. 

But Wonwoo leaves out his wish. You guess it’s cause he doesn’t want to seem pushy with it.

You can feel and hear your heartbeat running like crazy but you realize it feels a little different. It doesn’t feel like a heartbeat of fear. It feels more like a heartbeat of anticipation, of excitement. The realization only makes you more excited. Yes, you are still terrified to the point that your knuckles are almost white from gripping your microphone so hard. But there is a happiness knowing that excitement is mixed in with the nervousness. 

“Oh, and I have one last thing.” Seungcheol begins his rehearsed part. 

“Where are you going, hyung?” Dino asks as you know that Seungcheol is moving towards where you will pop out of. 

“Members stay there. I have a present for you.” Seungcheol says, giddily. “It’s a pretty cool surprise actually. One that I am very honored to be able to give my members. And I say it’s for all the members but in truth, it’s probably going to be most meaningful to Wonwoo.”

“Me?” Wonwoo wonders, confused as to what it could be. 

Peeking through the curtains, you watch the side screens and see that all the members are standing at the center on the big stage, confusion spread on all their faces. Even the Carats right in front of you are just as confused as the members are. Seungcheol walks backwards, never taking his eyes off his members. 

“Wonwoo, what was the wish you made yesterday?” Seungcheol asks Wonwoo to say his wish as he creeps over to side where you are hidden.

Wonwoo cautiously answers, unsure of where this is going. “That (y/n) and I could stand together on the stage again… Wait…” 

“Seriously?” Hoshi says in disbelief and many members’ jaws drop. 

“No… really?” Joshua mutters.

“I’m going to make our wish come true, Wonwoo.” Your voice echoes through the stadium a split second before you walk out into the open. 

For a second, hearing and seeing the fans screaming in front of you makes you hesitate. Seungcheol sees this and immediately skips down the stairs to stand next to you, a supportive hand out for you to hold and a confident smile on his face. He stands on the side with Carats to help block out the sight which brings you a bit of comfort that he knows exactly what you need without you having to voice it. 

With a death grip on your microphone and Seungcheol’s hand, you slowly take the steps, one by one. Seungcheol knows you have to take this slowly so he follows your pace. You try to avoid looking at the crowds, scared that they will make you turn around. In the quick glances you do take, you see that they all have smiles on their faces and some even have tears running down their cheeks but their smiles tell you they are happy tears. 

By the time you get up onto the stage, the members on stage are freaking out, jumping up and down and screaming. You are, of course, shaking like a leaf in the wind but the fact that you even stepped onto the stage gives you a sense of pride. 

With the realization that you are actually on the stage, your eyes begin to tear up, half from fear and half from happiness. You look at Wonwoo who is standing stunned in the middle of the members. Dokyeom is gripping onto his arm, shaking it with excitement (and a few tears) but it’s like Wonwoo’s stuck in a trance. Like he’s trying to decide if it’s a dream or if it's truly reality.

You bring the microphone up to your mouth and everyone can see the shake of your hand. “It’s been a few months, but this was something we both wanted. You want to come make it completely true?” You ask breathless from your heart racing so fast.

Your question breaks Wonwoo out of his trance. He blinks once before racing down the stage towards you with the other members following. But of course, being the fast runner he is, he beats all of them. 

Wonwoo slows down enough so he doesn’t slam into you but it is faster than you expected. He wraps you up in a hug and spins you around. He can feel just how hard your heart is beating which makes him even more proud that you are able to do this even through the nerves and the fear.

Wonwoo sets your feet on the floor but he doesn’t release you from his hold. So the other members have no choice but to give you a giant group hug. 

You plant a small hidden kiss on his neck (the only place you can reach in the tight hug) and tap his back twice letting him know he needs to let go. He backs away and a tiny bit of your shaking has left, now that you are surrounded with the people who bring you the most comfort. Wonwoo has a vice grip on your hand and you know he is not letting your hand go. 

Tears and smiles are everywhere on the members’ faces and as you bravely look out into the crowd, you see the same mirrored on the faces of Carats. 

You smile at the crowd and that only makes them scream louder. But once you raise your microphone up, they quiet down, eager to hear what you have to say. “It has been a very long time since I’ve said this.” You take in a deep breath, “Hello, Carats!” You say as loudly as your racing heart will let you and the entire stadium erupts in the loudest screams you have ever heard.

Even the Seventeen members are shocked that they could scream that loud. Seungcheol gets a bit pouty with jealously but from the gleam in his eyes, everyone knows he is only joking.

"Carats, I want to say thank you." You scan the crowd, making as much eye contact as you possibly can, "Thank you for supporting Seventeen. Thank you comforting Wonwoo and the others when I couldn't help. And lastly, thank you for supporting and waiting for me. I know it wasn't easy to watch all this happen, but knowing Seventeen always had your support made it easier for me to take time to heal. Thank you so much."

The crowd erupts into more screams and cheers. 

"What do you say, (y/n)? Think you can stay for a song?" Jeonghan wonders, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. 

"I think I can try, but don't expect me to move much." You say truthfully with a nervous laugh.

"You're here, that's all we care about right now." Wonwoo says, "And I'll stay right here with you." 

You smile and lean into him as the next encore set song begins to play. The members immediately start to run around and interact with the fans. Wonwoo stays next to you, bouncing along to the beat. He notices you not moving much so he stands behind you and wraps his arounds around your shoulders, using his body to gently move yours. Slowly, with every verse that passes, you loosen up and soon you're able to dance alone with Wonwoo at your side. Of course, you don't move from your spot but no one cares. Each member comes up to you and dances with you before moving on.

At first, you brushed it off as the lighting but as the days progressed, the darker they got. With the darker the shadow got, the more worried you became. His days were busy getting ready for a big competition and it meant you hardly had a chance to see him, much less have long conversations. 

The make up he wore covered up the shadows very well and you knew they were still there but it still shocked you when you were finally able to spend some time with him after his schedules slowed down. 

Throughout the ordered in dinner, you were constantly glancing at the dark marks under his eyes. You wondered if he was truly okay and taking care of himself.

It was only when he mentioned he had to go back to the studio after dinner that you spoke your mind.

“Why do you have to go back? I thought you didn’t have any deadlines coming up?” You asked, eyebrows scrunched in concerned confusion.

“I don’t.” Jun confirmed, “But I just have to go back.”

“Why?” You pushed, setting your utensils down. 

“I just have to.” He said and focused on his plate. 

“Is there something you’re not telling me?” You leaned against the table, trying to keep the concern out of your voice. 

Jun shook his head, “Of course not.”

“Then why do you look like you haven’t slept in weeks?” You ripped the bandaid off and left the question out in the open. 

After a second of silence, he gave an excuse, “I’ve just been really busy lately. Lots of schedules.”

You chewed on your lip, hating the confrontation that you were doing. “To me, I don’t think that’s-“

“I said I’m fine.” Jun snapped at you and finally met your eyes. His filled with defiance and yours filled with confusion.

Your mouth opened in shock but you weren’t able to form any words. 

Before you were able to get a single word out, Jun rose from the table, put his dishes in the sink, and quickly made his way out of your apartment.

“I’ll be back in a few hours.” He mumbled before leaving you staring at the closed front door. 

“What … just… happened?” You asked yourself. 

You had never seen Jun snap like that. Never had he been so dismissive of any emotion, especially his own. It felt as if he was covering something. Something he didn’t want to face yet. As the concerned girlfriend you were, you took charge in finding out what he was hiding from. 

But you knew you both needed just a bit of time to reevaluate before going into the conversation again. So you cleaned up the dishes and swept the floor before starting the walk to his studio. 

You could’ve taken public transportation to get there in like 15 minutes but you felt you needed just a bit more time to sort out how you were going to approach the topic. So you walked the 40 minute route to his company’s studio. 

The crickets sang from the surrounding trees and flowers and the occasional car passed by but those were the only sounds of the night. Most of the company employees had gone home for the night or were still out at the random team dinners. At the front desk sat the female staff who you’d become quite close with considering how often you came to the studios. She smiled at you but it felt like a smile that knew there was a problem between you and Jun.

“He’s in studio 6.” She informed you as you passed by.

“Thank you.” You thanked her and moved silently down the stairs and towards the biggest studio where all promotional videos were filmed. The one studio that everyone from fans to staff saw.

Walking down the hall, you could hear the vibrations from the music before you even saw the studio door. Jun usually likes to play his music loud but you couldn’t remember if it had ever been this loud. 

You peeked into the the room through the tiny space where the frosted covering didn’t quite cover. There he was, dancing his heart out and intently watching every move he made in the mirror. Like he was sure he was going to make a mistake he didn’t want to make. 

When the melody changed into another section, Jun ran his hands through his hair, frustrated. His run through wasn’t as perfect as he wanted it to be. With heavy sigh, he walked to the stereo and restarted the song. 

Unable to watch him get more frustrated (as you knew would happen), you opened the door and walked in. 

The sound of the door closing caused Jun to turn towards you. But he just busied himself with turning down the music with a exhale.

“What are you doing here? I said I’d be home in a few hours.” He said, still not looking at you.

“In dance terms, a few hours means ‘I have no idea when I will finish.’ I’ve been around long enough to know that much.” You replied, crossing your arms lightly. “I have a feeling you’re not telling me something and I don’t like being on the outside and watching you suffer through whatever it is.”

Jun gripped the edges of the stereo and lowers his head. “It’s nothing. I promise.”

“Don’t you promise me that.” It was your turn to be stern. “I can see on your face that this isn’t nothing.” 

“Can’t you just believe me this once?” He turned around and was silently pleading with you to leave the topic alone. But you weren’t about to do that.

You closed your eyes and your heart ached thinking about what was so bad that he needed to hide from you.

Wordlessly, you grabbed his hand and dragged him to stand closer to the mirror. He watched you in the mirror as you moved to stand next to him, unable to actually look at you.

“Right now,” You turned and looked up at him but he still just watched your reflection, “The way your shoulders are never relaxed and the bags underneath your eyes reflect the weight of this problem that you say is ‘nothing.’” You pointed to the mirror, “So what do you see?”

Jun finally looked at his own reflection and he could see you were right. He saw what you saw and he couldn’t even try to deny it. 

“I see a dancer who couldn’t win the biggest competition of the year and a boyfriend who couldn’t give enough time to you.” He admitted. “I see a dancer who swore to rise above the terrible coaches and teachers I had in the past and show them how good I could be. Yet, when the moment came, I wasn’t good enough to win. I wasn’t as into the routine as I should’ve been. My moves were not as clean as they should’ve been. I wasn’t as good as I needed to be.”

You knew his team hadn’t won the competition and you knew it was a big loss but loss was not something new. The team had lost competitions before. You also didn’t know that his old company was also competing. He never told you the name of the old company, claiming he only wanted to focus on the positive of the future with his current (and better) company. 

“Knowing those old coaches would be watching me and scrutinizing my every move kept me up at night. It made me practice harder and longer.” Jun started spilling the details of the past month and you placed a comforting hand on his arm. “But something happened when I physically saw them at the competition. It felt like I wasn’t standing with pride on top of all my achievements. It felt like I was back as a young kid, getting scolded by them, getting told I wasn’t good and that I wasn’t ever going to amount to anything.”

“Jun..” You gripped his hand as he tried his hardest not to break.

“And watching their smirks when they were announced as the winners crushed me.” He continued, breathing harder. “I thought I had gotten passed the revenge phase where all I wanted to do was beat them and show them up.  But feeling how upset I was at losing specifically to them made me question if I had truly moved on which then turned into questioning if I have been living on lies this entire time. Then when I would see you, I wondered if I made a mistake in not telling you everything about my past. I started to regret not telling you, wondering if I told you then none of this would have happened.”

You moved to stand in front of Jun, looking up at him as his worries etched their way into his face, breaking the man who always stood tall. 

Yet Jun kept staring straight ahead, as if it was his punishment to look at himself and the mess he’d become. “And it became harder and harder to face you with the pretense that my past wasn’t haunting me. That things I kept hidden from you were coming back for me and I couldn’t stop them.” 

Having heard enough, you grabbed his face and forced him to look at you. “Stop.” You said in an almost silent voice. “It was not a mistake to not tell me. You were doing what you thought was best and that was not a mistake. But I think over the past month, you forgot an important detail.” You stared into his eyes that glisten with the tears he’s trying to hold back. “Your past might be haunting you right now, but you are not alone. You do not have to stop them alone. I’m right here. I will always be right here.”

You lowered your hands to rest on his chest. “The people from your past are just that, Jun, people from the past. If you ask me, I think you have healed from what happened but I also know that old scars can ache at reminders of painful events. For you, that was seeing those people in person. It’s not easy, and it will never be easy. But you do not have to deal with it alone. You have your coaches, your mentors, your teammates, and most importantly you have me.”

Jun closed his eyes and a couple tears slipped out. You wiped them away and wrapped your arms around his waist. As his walls broke down, your heart ached knowing all you could do was comfort him when you wanted to fix it for him. In that moment, you wanted to repay him for all he'd helped you through but you didn't know if you could even do a fraction of what he did for you.

You took a deep breath in. "I have always known you to be someone who uses people's hate and underestimation of you to motivate you to grow stronger, to develop skills that would put those people in their places." You told him, recalling what you've seen as you watched him shine throughout your time together. "And I know this time was a little different for you but I believe that you can find a way to use this hurt and anger and confusion to do seriously amazing things. To do something so extraordinary that their smirks will burn out like water splashing onto a torch." 

Jun slowly shook his head, denying your claims. 

"Maybe not right away." You corrected yourself, "But in time I think you can. This is a confusing time for you and I can see that. And it is understandable." You had to steady yourself before saying what you knew had to be said though it hurt. "If there is even the tiniest voice saying you need space and time, Jun, I will give you that."

"Why would I need that?" Jun asked, opening his eyes in surprise and grabbing your hand.

You smiled softly at him, "Because seeing me was magnifying the confusion. And I don't want to do that to you. So if not seeing me for a little bit will help you sort through all these emotions, then I will do that for you."

Jun's hand gripped yours tighter, "But that's not what I meant." 

"I know it's not." You took a half step forward, "But be honest with me. Is there not the tiniest voice in your mind saying you need to sort through this without me? A voice that knows trying to sort through this with me by your side might lead to the end of us." 

You didn't want there to be that voice but you knew there was a large possibility it was there. You knew how his mind worked and in the second of loud silence that it took for him to answer, your heart cracked a little more.

"There is..." Jun admitted in a whisper. "But I don't... I don't want you to leave me."

"I'm not leaving you." You rested a hand on his cheek, "I am still your girlfriend. I will always be your girlfriend until the day you say otherwise. Just imagine that this is me going on a girls' vacation to a remote island with really bad cell and wifi services. But if it gets really bad, know you can always call me."

"What if it's a long time?" Jun readjusted his grip on me. 

"Then I will wait a long time. You're worth waiting for Jun. And knowing how these types of emotions can motivate you, I'm ready to wait to see how you'll grow." You said with a comforting confidence. 

"And when I'm ready, you'll come back?" He asked, his heart beating quickly with worry that you'll give him an answer he didn't want to hear.

"Just say my name and I will come running. No matter where you are. No matter who I'm hanging out with." You assured him, "I will go running to you however far away you are from me."

Jun nodded and lowered his head in shame, "I'm sorry." 

"Don't you dare apologize." You lightly scolded him. "Never apologize for this. The only apology I will accept is if you can't ever get past this. But I don't believe that is something you're capable of doing."

The tiniest smile touched Jun's lips but it quickly disappeared. 

"I promise, I swear on my heart, that I will get through this and I will call you." Jun declared, looking at you dead in the eyes. 

You smiled before pressing a soft kiss onto his cheek. "I love you."

"I love you, too." He whispered before kissing you on the lips softly. 

Then you backed away and left him in studio 6, a new determination stirring in his chest.

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[SIKE! I could never have a writing end like that!]

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The past month had been a weird mix of moving quickly and moving like a snail. Some days, you didn't have a single worry about Jun and other days you were riddled with worries about him. On those days, you would chat with Hoshi, his team mate and best friend. Hoshi would give you updates and help ease your mind. Updates like how Jun had started to choreograph dances, how even though he still had some struggles, he was getting better. And you knew Hoshi was also giving Jun updates about you as well. You had asked him to if Jun was ever really worried about you.

Jun hadn't called you yet which was a relief to you because it meant he was able to handle everything on his own and there wasn't a really bad day.

You were on your way to meet up with Hoshi at the company with two coffees in hand. The sun was shining and it was a good day. You were sure of it. Something about it just felt ... lighter.

You entered the main lobby and easily found a table to sit at. Not a minute later, Hoshi busted into the lobby with a large smile and arms outstretched for a hug.

"It's been forever, (y/n)." Hoshi said before pulling you into a second hug. 

You pulled back and then saw someone rushing out from the hallway. 

Jun frantically looked left and right before finally spotting you, half covered by Hoshi's deceivingly large frame. 

"Jun." You whispered his name and Hoshi turned to look where you were looking.

"(y/n)." He said your name and your surroundings disappeared.

You ran to him and he caught you in an embrace like it was rehearsed a million times before. Which it might as well have been considering how many times you imagined this scenario. 

"I missed you." He said and buried his head into your neck. 

"I've missed you more." You countered. 

Turns out, Hoshi was noticing the more Jun healed, the more he started to miss you. Not in the regretful sense, but truly missing you. Jun would make comments about how you would like a certain part of a routine, or how you would like the new cafe they started to frequent, or how you would do this or that because of something funny that happened in the studio. So when he was heading out to meet you, he made the passing comment that he was headed to see you. Jun heard your name and it took him way longer than he would every admit to realize that was his chance to get you back. To tell you he was ready. To show you how he'd grown and the things he'd accomplished. And then he took off running back to you.

"You're okay?" You brought his hand to your lips.

"I'm okay." Jun nodded proudly. "No, I'm more than okay."

"I can tell you." You smiled at him, noticing the pure joy that filled his eyes instead of the dread that filled his eyes the last time you saw him.

Jun smiled, leaned forward, and gave you an unexpected kiss. "I have so much to tell you." He said, pulling back slightly.

“And yet, here it is.” Hoshi smiled and clapped him on the shoulder as the others made their way on set. 

As they all get seated and comfortable, you watch them from behind the line of cameras with sunglasses and a beanie covering your identity. You easily find the one you were specifically here for. 

Jeonghan waits for the PD’s to tell them the rules of the episode that has become many Carat’s and Cubic’s favorite episode. His eyes pause on you for a split second and you fear that he’ll call you out and the plan will be ruined. But there’s no recognition on his face and he turns his attention to the members around him.

The rules are very similar as last time. PD’s against Seventeen. Three lowest heart beat ranges get to go home. If the production crew’s representative gets first place, that department gets to go home. 

Some members have fear in their eyes while others have pure mischief in theirs, specifically Jeonghan. 

The filming goes as planned. The boys rip into Seungcheol about the things he does behind the scenes. 

As Jeonghan prepares to attempt to sleep, the PD announces a slight change.

He sits, waiting for the PD to explain the change.

“We have a secret weapon.” The PD says, “Since you have twelve people to try and make our crew member laugh, we needed someone on our side. So, we’ve brought in someone special to help with it.”

You walk into the view of the camera and smile and wave. “Hi boys.” 

Jeonghan sits stunned on the mattress before a nervous laugh erupts from his throat. 

“Isn’t this going overboard?” He asks but you shake your head and make your way over to where the rest of the boys are sitting. 

“Jeonghan hyung is nervous!” Dino points out and laughs happily.

“I’m not nervous!” Jeonghan says defensively and readjusts the blankets. “Everyone should be nervous. Who knows what kind of stories she’s got on you.”

“Thank goodness, I already went.” Seungcheol breathes out a sigh of relief with a hand over his heart. The comment earns him a smack from Jun. 

“Jeonghan, your heartbeat’s too fast.” The PD says and everyone cracks up.

Jeonghan hangs his head low before asking, “How can you expect my heartbeat to slow down when my girlfriend is about to embarrass me?”

“I would never embarrass you!” You tell him but he immediately gives you a look. “I would never majorly embarrass you.” You correct yourself with a sheepish smile.

“Jeonghan, deep breaths.” Seungcheol says and acts out deep breathing.

Eventually, Jeonghan gets his heartbeat down to a good enough level for the crew and his time starts. He lays back and a bright spotlight shines on the bed while all the other lighting dims.

“Do we have any stories about Jeonghan hyung?” Hoshi asks to the group. 

“Well, there’s the underwear incident.” Dino mentions and Dokyeom bursts into laughter.

“Tell it, tell it, tell it.” Dokyeom says between breaths.

"For his birthday, I gave him a silly pair of underwear.” Dino says, “It had like cherries all over it. He said he really liked them and that he’d wear them often. But then, a few months later, I was raiding through his closet for a sweater and I found the underwear, still in the package, shoved under a pile of old clothes, in the corner of the closet!” He finishes with frustration. “You said you would wear them! And the excuse you gave was not even good!”

“What did he say? What did he say?” Hoshi looks at Dino.

“He said he was saving it for a special occasion.” Dino stares at Jeonghan, “But in those few months there were SO many special occasions!” 

Jeonghan presses his lips together to keep from laughing while everyone laughs at the story.

“(y/n), you got any stories?” Mingyu asks when they’ve quieted down. 

“Of course, I do.” You reply and launch into the story you’ve been dying to tell since it happened. “So, I had been having a stressful week and I guess Jeonghan wanted to help me out. He decided to clean the house for me while I was out at work.”

“Hyung? Cleaning?” Seungkwan repeats, “You’re lying.”

“No, I’m being serious!” You retort, “He had slept over and I needed to go to work so I left him in bed and went to work. Spent the day stressed and was looking forward to coming home and relaxing with my boyfriend and a movie.” With gestures to accompany the story, you mimic opening a door, “I opened the door and I nearly had a heart attack.”

“Why, why?” Dokyeom asked, gripping your arm.

Seungcheol chuckles and covers his mouth. “Oh, I know this story. Jeonghan told me.”

“Woah, this must’ve been seriously embarrassing.” Seungkwan comments. 

“Keep going.” Wonwoo encourages you. 

“I get home, and I swear to god, there’s laundry drying on every possible surface. The drying rack, the chairs, the back of the couch.” You continue, replaying the scene in my mind. “The dishes were cleaned, the floor was swept, and Jeonghan was in a different room vacuuming away so he didn’t hear me enter. But I was looking over the laundry and I noticed a pink shirt that I had never seen before.” 

Jeonghan’s eyes squeeze tighter to keep from responding. 

“I picked it up and it was wayyyy too big to be mine so I figured it was Jeonghan’s. But then I realized it was his favorite sweater that I bought him for Christmas. The only problem? When I bought it, it was white. Like white white.” You keep telling the story with giggles and laughter erupting from all around you. “I looked around further and saw my collection of red clothes that I always wash separately and a lot of those clothes were brand new.”

“Oh no! Hyung!” Mingyu exclaims, “You never mix those kinds of clothes!”

“Not the red clothing!” Vernon reacts in his own over the top way, hands in the air and face contorted into despair. 

“But the biggest turn of events?” You continue over the laughter, “Jeonghan didn’t even notice the staining. I asked him about it and he didn’t even realize it was his sweater that he had put into the wash with my clothes!” You finish while laughing, toppling into Dokyeom who is probably laughing harder than anyone in the room.

Jeonghan is laying on the mattress, struggling to keep calm. His face is turning red and his lips curl in laughter that is kept absolutely silent. 

“So did you buy him a new sweater?” The8 wonders, tapping your shoulder. 

“Of course I did!” You exclaim, holding up your hands for added emphasis, “With his credit card.”

With the last comment, the whole group loses any and all composure. Even Jeonghan’s chest is now shaking with his laughter but yet, not a sound has escaped his mouth. As per the rules if he doesn’t want to get eliminated. 

“Look at Jeonghan hyung.” Seungkwan says through immense laughter. “His face is so red.”

“Woah, the Going staff really know how to hit hard.” Woozi comments, pointing a finger at the staffs. 

The bell rings and the lights turn back on, signaling the end of Jeonghan’s turn. 

“Hey, (y/n).” He rises, pointing a finger at you. “Why would you tell that story?” He squeezes to sit next to you, “There were so many other less embarrassing stories, why did you choose that one?” He leans in closer before tackling you to the floor with tickles that prevent you from responding.

“Sua hyung, your turn.” Jun pushes the older over towards the sleeping mattress. 

Jeonghan finally lets up and helps you sit up but keeps an arm wrapped around your waist securely.

As Joshua settles under the blanket, Jeonghan leans down and whispers in your ear. “You did bring stories about the others, right? I’m not the only one you’re targeting.”

You giggle, “Oh, I’m getting all of you back for the countless times you’ve let something about me slip on VLives.” 

“Good lord, save us all.” Jeonghan jokes and the lights dim down.

“I want to know what story (y/n) has first.” Wonwoo says, nudging your shoulder.

“Oh, I have plenty of stories about all of you.” You smirk. “But Joshua first.”

Joshua raises his hands in a prayer gesture but it’s a fickle attempt to get mercy.

With their attention on you, you begin the story you have about Joshua. 

Walking into the busy restaurant, the hostess greets me with a warm smile.

“Welcome. Do you have a reservation?” She asks.

“Yes, four people for Rene.” I reply, glancing around looking for my friends.

The hostess looks down her list and her mouth purses slightly. “I’m sorry. I don’t see a reservation under that name. Would you like to be put on the waiting list?”

Now it’s my turn to be utterly confused. I clearly remember Rene saying that she would make the reservation and take care of it all. “Uh, no. Thank you.” I answer the hostess and move towards the front door. 

Once outside, I immediately call Rene and she picks up on the fourth ring.

“Hey, (y/n).” Rene’s cheery voice rubs against my skin like sandpaper. 

“Hey, where are you?” I ask, now wondering if she even remembered our plans.

“I’m out with Junsu, why? What’s up?” She asks, innocently.

“Are we not meeting tonight?” I let annoyance slip into my voice.

“Oh! Oh my god! I totally forgot!” Rene exclaims. “Chayoung had to cancel last minute and Suzie wasn’t feeling good so we cancelled the reservation. I totally forgot to tell you! I’m so sorry, (y/n).”

Angry and frustration burn through my veins and I close my eyes to try and keep my composure. 

“You didn’t leave your house yet, did you?” Rene sounds apologetic but something about it sounds extremely fake to me. 

“Well, considering I live the farthest from anyone, I did leave my house. Next time, just have some heart to at least include me in the group conversation.” I say shortly before ending the call without a goodbye. 

Even glancing at the restaurant makes my breath pick up. So I start walking towards the nearest transit station to return home. As I walk, my phone rings with another call. I expect it to be Rene so I plan on ignoring it but instead it’s Minghao calling.

I clear my throat to get rid of any lingering annoyance before answering.

“Hey, what’s up?” I ask, pulling my jacket tighter around me.

“Hey, did you meet up with your friends?” Minghao’s voice asks with a familiar calm.

“Mmm.” I lie through my teeth. 

“Is the restaurant busy?” He continues to question.

I look around at the dark and empty street surrounding me and feel the tears well up in my eyes. “A bit.” I say and I pray he doesn’t notice how my voice wavers. But like any good boyfriend, he notices in an instant.

“What’s wrong? Why do you sound like that?” He quickly sounds worried.

“They… I should’ve known they’d do this.” I let my head drop. “I just thought this time since we haven’t seen each other in a while they would really keep these plans.”

“They cancelled?” Minghao concludes.

“Yeah.” I swallow the frustrated sobs back. “And they cancelled today, without telling me.”

“Those-“ Minghao cuts himself off. “Where are you?” He wonders and I can feel his frustrations.

“Near the restaurant, headed towards the station. I’m going home.” I tell him, and blink away the tears while looking up at the sky.

“No, stay right there.” He says and a door slams in the background, “I’m coming to pick you up. My home is closer than yours anyway.”

“I’m fine.” What I really want is to just be alone. 

“Absolutely not.” He refuses. “Stay where you are. Do not move.” 

The authority in his voice stops my feet in there tracks.

“Okay.” I cave into his demands. “But hurry, please?”

“Of course. Stay put, (y/n).” He finishes before ending the call. 

The moon shines in the sky, bright but alone for the city lights block the stars from showing. I wrap my arms around myself and my mind beings to wonder how I could be so naive to continuously believe them when all they do is let me down. 

They’ve always known it takes me the longest to get anywhere in this city so I’m always the first to leave my house. They know this and yet in the past, they’ve changed the time on me as I was making my way to the place. Every time.

I exhale as a particularly cold wind breezes by. The chill takes me by surprise and I tighten my grip to keep myself warm.

Just then, a car does a quick U-Turn and stops right in front of me. The driver’s door opens and Minghao rushes out of the car. Before I can even say a word, he has me wrapped in his arms with his head resting on top of mine.

“You okay?” He asks, rubbing my back. 

I nod my head, not trusting that the tears would stay back if I used my voice.

Minghao sighs, “How could they even, uhg.” He plants a kiss to my temple. “Oh shit.” He mumbles into my hair.

“Mm?” I wonder, pulling back.

“You haven’t eaten dinner yet.” He widens his eyes for added emphasis and there’s a childlike twinkle.

I shake my head. “No, not yet.”

“What would you like to eat?” He asks, leading me towards the car.

“Pizza and fries.” I settle into the seat and Minghao smiles before closing my door.

Once he’s seated behind the wheel, he uses his phone to order from our favorite pizza restaurant. I watch the way his eyes rush to scan over the menu, looking for the perfect pizza. The way his lips silently read each menu item and how he thinks about what add-ons we need. 

“All set.” He sets his phone down. “It should be ready to pick up once we get there. They had this new menu, some new dessert so I ordered it.”

“Oh, the brownie things?” I recall seeing advertisements for it. “Those looked good. Good choice.” I give him thumbs up.

He chuckles and starts driving to the pizza store.

“You going to be okay?” He asks, keeping his eyes on the road but expertly finding my hand.

“Yeah, eventually.” I say, honestly. “But I don’t know how it’ll take to get over this one.”

“Can I be honest with you?” He squeezes my hand twice.

“Always.” I look over at him and notice his eyes are debating something. 

“I don’t really know how to say it so I’m going to say it bluntly.” He starts, “I really don’t think you should be seeing them anymore. They’ve done this to you multiple times. And not to say that I don’t like rescuing you, but I definitely do not like how your reason for needing rescuing is because of your own friends. That hurts me more. I don’t want to see that anymore. I really think you need to not see them anymore. Or at least limit contact to like… never.”

I chuckle, “Those two options are basically the same.” I point out. 

Minghao shrugs.

“No, you’re right.” I inhale, intertwining our fingers together. “I need to do something. I don’t know if cutting them off is the right thing or if I need to confront them on it. But something does need to change. I’ll figure it out eventually.”

“I know you will.” Minghao smiles softly, “You always do. Your brain always figures it out splendidly.” He brings my hand up and kiss the back of my hand. “Plus you look absolutely gorgeous while doing it.”

I smack his shoulder, playfully.

“Careful, I’m driving here.” Minghao laughs, shaking my hand. 

“Thanks for rescuing me… again.” I kiss the back of his hand.

“Any time. Though I hope it won’t happen again for a long while.” He glances over at me.

I nod in agreement.

“Now, let’s go get our pizza!” He declares and raises our connected hands into the air like a battlecry. 

As expected, they’re happily chatting away with smiles on their faces.

Woozi and Seungkwan sit at the end closest to the door so they notice you first.

“Oh! (Y/n), you’re here!” Seungkwan cheers happily and rises to give you a hug.

Once he says your name the whole table is turning their heads to greet you. After being released from Seungkwan’s hug, your eyes drift to where Seungcheol is pulling out the empty chair next to him.

“No trouble on the way here?” He asks you when you near him.

You shake your head. “Nope. Surprisingly there were hardly any people out so I didn’t have any run ins.”

He nods happily, “Good, good.” He breathes out and helps remove your jacket off your shoulders.

“Did you guys order yet?” You ask aloud and slide in your chair next to Wonwoo.

Jeonghan who sits across from you nods his head, “But you can order other things if you want. Mingyu said he’s paying.”

“Did I say that?” Mingyu perks into the conversation upon hearing his name. “When did I say that?”

“Yesterday, in the morning.” Hoshi reminds him with a point of his finger.

You lean in closer to Seungcheol and ask, “Did you order for me too?”

He looks over at you with a smile, “Yes, I made sure they ordered things without seafood as well. For you and Wonwoo.”

“Thank you.” You say sweetly and peck his lips.

Vernon grabs your attention and asks your opinion of the drama you are both watching.

As the meal progresses, dishes get passed around and bellies get fed but the conversations never die down. Throughout the meal, Seungcheol keeps an eye on the dishes that are within your reach, making sure theres always a dish that you can enjoy. Of course he’s also doing it for Wonwoo but he won’t hesitate to admit that making sure you’re well fed is his priority.

Towards the ends of the meal, he notices that all the seafood dishes somehow made it in front of you and Wonwoo. Knowing neither of you will touch the dishes, he searches up and down the table for dishes that you would eat.He spots a couple but they’re at the other end of the table. Discreetly, because he doesn’t want to make it a big deal, he waves down Vernon who is sat right in front of one of the dishes he has his eye on.

With a wave of his hand, Vernon understands Seungcheol’s unspoken words and quickly passes the dish over. Seungcheol quietly swaps it out one of the seafood dishes before figuring out how to the get the second dish in front of you.

Jeonghan notices his search and gives him a confused look. To which, Seungcheol nods towards you and eyes the dishes in front of you. Jeonghan still doesn’t understand all the head nods and the looks so he goes back to ignoring Seungcheol.

The other dish he is searching for is on the other end of the table in front of Minghao. And so, with the behind-the-scenes-skill of a leader, he manages to get the dish down the table and in front of you.

You notice the second dish being set in front of you by Mingyu and you give him a weird look.

He shrugs, “Minghao gave it to me,”

You look further down the table at Minghao.

Minghao also shrugs, “Seungcheol hyung was looking at me weird and then he started doing weird motions until I grabbed the dish.”

By now, the members in the path of conversation all have their attention to what’s going on.

You turn your head 180 degrees and look at Seungcheol who is busy giving himself a bit more food.

He knew you were looking without even looking himself.

“Gotta make sure you eat.” Seungcheol mentions giving you a glance and picking up some food with his chopsticks.

You try to suppress the big fat smile that was threatening to spill but it’s really hard when this man makes you feel all loved and cared for with even the smallest of actions.

“Thank you.” You throw your arms around his shoulders making him drop his food back onto his plate. “You are the sweetest.” You tell him before planting a large kiss onto his cheek.

A red blush creeps onto his cheeks. He loves your praises but he’s not used to being showered with them in front of all the guys. Being extra squishy in front of them is something he knows they will never let him forget.

A chorus of ‘oooooh’s erupts from around the table and Seungcheol’s hands immediately cover his face.

“Coups’ face is bright red!” Jeonghan teases with a wide smile on his face.

“Of course, S.Coups is that type of boyfriend.” Hoshi gives two thumbs up with his signature squinty eye smile.

“Seungcheolie is the greatest! As expected.” Dino compliments the leader.

You giggle and squeeze Seungcheol a little tighter.

“You know,” He mutters quietly for you, “I meant to do that all without anyone noticing.”

“Too bad. We did.” You smirk and give him another kiss before letting him go and resuming the meal.

The end of the dinner finishes with Mingyu paying for the meal as Jeonghan said he would. But instead of going back with the boys, Seungcheol decides to spend the night at your place since nothing particularly important was happening the next day.

After the cars with the rest of the members drives off, Seungcheol grabs your hand and begins walking towards your apartment.

“Did you have a good time?” He asks, looking over at you.

You nod with a smile on your face. “Of course, I always have fun with you idiots.”

Seungcheol chuckles, “I’m glad. I’m glad.”

“Seungcheol.” You call him, press yourself into his arm, and warp your free hand around his arm.

“Mmm?” He hums in response, unfazed by your sudden closeness.

“For real, you didn’t have to do that, you know.” You tell him.

He shrugs, “I did it because I wanted to.”

“I didn’t have to.” You say with a teasing tone.

Seungcheol catches on and teases you back, “You didn’t like it?” He asks with big puppy eyes. “Well, if you didn’t like it, then you can think it wasn’t for you.” He says with a pout.

You pull back slightly, “Then who was it for?”

He smiles smugly at you. “Wonwoo.” He answers before slipping out of your grip and skipping ahead, completely content with himself.

You shake your head and laugh. “Seungcheol, wait for me!” You say and go running to catch up with him.

With a smile, Seungcheol turns and jogs backwards while holding out his arms for you to collide with.

You don’t slow down as you near him and the force of you hitting him releases a grunt. But once his arms are securely around you, he sighs contently.

My eyes search the group for the face I see every time I close my eyes. When I find Wonwoo, a smile appears on my face like second nature. The song plays and Hoshi is screaming into his microphone like he’s had way too much caffeine, which is probably true. Seungkwan and Woozi are staring in embarrassment while DK is off with Dino doing some weird dance moves.

I carefully watch Wonwoo make his way around the group, singing and vibing with different members. But then I notice something strange.

Whenever Mingyu gets within a few feet of him, Wonwoo turns around and walks the other way. Upon closer inspection, I notice that every so often Wonwoo will give Mingyu a glare. Not one that the fans will pick up on but I know what emotion lies underneath the look.

It peaks my curiosity because last night the same thing happened. During the encore stage last night, Wonwoo never got close to Mingyu like he usually does. And he would sometimes throw him odd glances and looks.

Once the program fades into the true ending, I pull out my phone and text the group chat a quick congrats before moving to the private chat between Wonwoo and I.

“Sleepover at mine?” I text him, wanting to get him alone to see what is wrong.

Knowing it will take him a few minutes to get back to his phone, I start to clean up the kitchen since I got lazy before the music show started. There are quite a few dishes so it takes me a good chunk of time to get them done.

When I check my phone, there’s a message from Wonwoo and many from the group chat.

“Yes please.” Wonwoo’s message reads, “I’ll be over in like 45 minutes.”

“Take your time.” I reply back, “I’ll still be awake.”

A smiley face is his response.

Turning on some music, I set aside my phone and pick up my coloring book and markers. The next page I need to color is a mosaic of a lynx lurking around some trees. Excited, I dive right into the world of colors and lines.

Once I finish with the lynx, I move onto the background but I don’t get to finish it because Wonwoo enters the passcode to my door. I discard the book to the side and open my arms as he enters my home. He takes one look at me and immediately drops his bag and jacket before dropping onto the couch and into me. His weight pushes me back into the couch. Wrapping my arms around his body, he wraps his arms around my stomach and relaxes his head against my chest.

For a few minutes, we sit in silence together. I run my hand through his hair, thankful that they didn’t use too much product on his hair for this comeback.

“Everything okay?” I ask, starting the conversation that I know he needs.

Wonwoo sighs heavily, “Not really.”

I rest my cheek on the top of his head, “Tell me.”

“It’s Mingyu.” Wonwoo admits and hugs me closer.

I press my lips together because hearing that my suspicions were correct sucks. “What happened with Mingyu?” I question.

“Remember a couple months ago when we had that really big fight?” He asks and I recall the fight with a nod. “Well, I had confided in Mingyu quite a bit during that time because I knew he got along well with you and I just needed someone to talk to.”

“Yeah.” I comment. “Makes sense.”

“And I thought the conversations we had were just between us, you know? I didn’t need the other members to know the nitty-gritty details of what was running through my mind at the time.” He continues. “When Seungcheol finally talked to me through the whole thing, I thought he did it because he had had enough of my odd behavior and wanted to help set me straight.”

I brush some of his hair back from his face and look down at him, “Was that not the case?”

Wonwoo shakes his head against me causing more hair to fall into his face. “No. Turns out Mingyu went and told Seungcheol everything I had said.”

“Oh.” I say, quickly understanding why Wonwoo is upset with Mingyu but at the same time, understanding why Mingyu did it.

“I told him so many secrets and thoughts that I really didn’t need Seungcheol to know about.” Wonwoo continues to vent. “I trusted him not to say anything because seriously, I did not need Seungcheol to know about some of the things I said.”

I pull back slightly and look down at him in confusion, his words sounding worse than I’m sure he intended.

He glances up and catches onto my look. “Oh, not in that way. Just some of my thoughts were not best about myself.” He clarifies and I nod, telling him to continue.

“So Mingyu told Seungcheol about your late night talks with him and Seungcheol then decided that he needed to step in?” I restate what I’ve been hearing.

“Yeah, but I’m just pissed at Mingyu for doing it.” Wonwoo says, slightly defeated. “Like I wish he would’ve just told me that he was going to tell Seungcheol or something. Not keep it quiet and then I find out months later.”

“I mean, would it have been any better if you had found out then?” I question as his voice of reason.

“Yes.” Wonwoo answers with conviction. “Because then I would’ve known that Seungcheol had known how I was really feeling and what I was really thinking and then the conversation that we had wouldn’t have been so long and so tangled.”

Rubbing my hand up and down his back, I sigh, “Okay, you need to tell me the gist of the things you said to Mingyu because you’ve got me slightly worried.”

“It was just fears that we were going to break up and that I was going to lose you for good and how it was all my fault and basically I was really negative about myself.” Wonwoo tells me. “I was a bit desperate and it wasn’t something that I wanted others to know about. Which is another reason I’m pissed at him. He knew that I didn’t want people knowing about those nights. He knew that I was desperate and I even said that I didn’t want to the others to know how I was acting but he still goes and yaps to Seungcheol about every detail that happened between us.”

Wonwoo pushes back from me and leans against the couch with an arm covering his eyes. “I’m just so done with telling him things. I’m just so done with him thinking that he knows everything and that he can always do something to help. It was my business to tell, not his.”

I turn my body towards his and rest my head on my fist.

“I mean the talk I had with Seungcheol was so messed up and confusing that he and I basically got into an argument and it honestly was the worst conversation he and I have had in all the years we’ve known each other.” Wonwoo continues to rant, “And it could’ve been avoided if Mingyu didn’t go behind my back to Seungcheol and spill everything. Or if he had at least told me he told Seungcheol.”

I gaze at Wonwoo. I hate the way his jaw clenches with stress and the way his hands are stiff with an alertness that should not be there. But I can’t make this all go away. As much as I want to, that’s not my role. And I know that.

“You know,” I say softly, easing into the conversation that I know he doesn’t want to hear, “You’re going to have to talk to Mingyu at some point. If you carry on ignoring him like this, the fans are going to notice and the others will see it too.”

“I know.” Wonwoo sighs heavily, “I just don’t know if I can do it right now.”

“Wonwoo, I get why you’re mad. I really do.” I tell him and he peers at me from under his arm. “But I’m sure Mingyu was just really worried about you. And I would guess that if Mingyu hadn’t said anything to Seungcheol, Seungcheol wouldn’t have talked to you because he knows how private you are.”

“He’s still an ass for doing it.” Wonwoo mutters and recovers his eyes.

“Yes, yes he is.” I agree with him because I do understand the distrust he is feeling. “But if Mingyu hadn’t said anything to Seungcheol, Seungcheol wouldn’t have talked to you, and you and I wouldn’t be talking.” I tell him how I see the situation. “You don’t have to forgive him now or even want to be close to him but you can’t stay mad at him forever.”

“Watch me.” Wonwoo grumbles and I exhale slowly.

“He’s your best friend, Wonwoo.” I try again to make him see that it isn’t all that bad. “He did the shitty thing because he was genuinely worried about you and your mental state. He saw you were hurting and because he probably didn’t know how to help, he turned to Seungcheol for help. Which was what you needed though you didn’t know it.”

“Maybe Mingyu knew you wouldn’t listen to the advice that he gave you so he went to the person he knew you would listen to.” I keep talking while Wonwoo stays, unmoving and just listening. “I just don’t want to see you burn this bridge with Mingyu. Especially over this.”

“But he broke my trust.” Wonwoo sits up and looks at me, expectantly.

“Yes he did.” I say calmly and search his eyes for any sign that he’s done with the conversation. “But have you talked to him about it at all yet?” I question.

“No, I haven’t.” Wonwoo answers and runs his hands through his hair. “I’ve been too angry about it.”

I reach out a hand and rest it on his arm. “Go talk to him first.” I advise him, “Maybe Mingyu has been feeling guilty about it for months but with how he is, he won’t say anything because he can’t stand to have anyone mad at him, especially you. Give him a chance to apologize before you decide anything.”

“It just sucks that I had to find out this way.” Wonwoo says, his voice weaker.

I nod and scoot closer to him, “I know. It really is suck-y but it’s what happened. Now what are you going to do about it? That’s the real question.”

“But I can be angry about it, right?” He wonders and looks over at me, the anger gone and replaced with an innocent wonder. Like a child who is still learning about the world of emotions.

“Of course you can be angry about it.” I confirm for him, “He went behind your back which was a crappy thing to do but he still deserves a chance to apologize. I can guarantee you that he knows what he did was wrong and not cool but he probably was just trying to help you because if you were anything like me during that fight, you would’ve needed all the help you could get.”

Wonwoo sighs and wraps his arm around me, bringing me closer to him. “That fight was absolute shit, wasn’t it?”

I nod, cuddling into his warmth. “One we weren’t getting through without help. So if we think about it, Mingyu pretty much saved our relationship…” I trail off.

“You’re right.” Wonwoo comments and then rubs his hand over his eyes, “Which is slightly fucked. He breaks my trust yet saves my relationship. So do I hate him or do I thank him?”

“You see if he will apologize for breaking your trust and if he gives it to you, you thank him.” I tell him and Wonwoo gives me a small smile.

“Okay.” He decides, “I’ll talk to him.”

“Sooner rather than later, Mister.” I remind him with a stern look.

“Agreed but it can wait until tomorrow. Right now, I want to stay with you.” Wonwoo says before kissing my forehead. “Thank you.” He mumbles against my skin.

“You’re welcome.” I accept his gratitude, “I’m always here to talk.”

Wonwoo reaches for my coloring book and holds it in his lap, “A lynx?”

I shrug, “It was the next in the book.”

“That tree in the back should be purple.” Wonwoo comments and points to a large tree right behind the animal.

I chuckle, “Why?”

“Why not?” He shrugs and raises his eyebrows playfully.

“It’s not realistic.” I banter.

"Jihoon, is that you?" His mother called from the kitchen.

"Yeah, it's me." He answered while walking further into the house.

His mother sat at the kitchen island while his father was busy chopping up vegetables for dinner. She set down her wine glass before getting up and giving Jihoon a vice grip hug.

"How are you doing?" She asked him pulling away and letting him breathe.

He nodded, "Been pretty good and busy. Just happy I can rest for a few days."

"Rest." His father repeats and used air quotes to emphasize the word. "I'm sure he'll be composing another song until the wee hours of the morning."

"No, I'm serious this time." Jihoon chuckled, "I'm resting during this visit. I'm under strict orders from Seungcheol."

His mother sighed, "I can't believe someone has to order you to rest."

He just shrugged, "Some people don't have an off switch. What's been going on with you guys?" He asked, wanting to divert the attention off him being a workaholic.

"Nothing too crazy." His father commented, picking up an onion, "We had dinner with (y/n)'s parents last week."

"Oh, how are they doing?" Jihoon asked, a little thrown off to hear your name pop up. You had moved away to the city years after he did and he wasn't really in contact with you. Though he wished he was.

"They're doing good. Apparently (y/n)'s been staying with them for the past couple weeks." His father continued, "Something about the city being too crazy."

His mother swallowed her sip of wine, "The city must've really stressed her out."

Jihoon scrunched up his eyebrows, "Why do you say that?"

"She's gone and made a fire in the pit pretty much every night." His mother nodded towards the window where a clear view of the beach was visible.

"Well, I now need my sous chef." His father stated and Jihoon shook himself out of his thoughts.

"Yeah, yeah. Where's my apron?" He wondered and his mother just pointed to the drawer where it had always been.

You walked up the front steps of your parents' house while the dark sky peered down at you curiously. You had intended to only take an hour walk but it turned into a two hour excursion. But the night was just too nice to go back after an hour.

--------

"Is that you, (y/n)?" Your mom called from upstairs as you opened the front door.

"Yeah!" You answered, "Sorry it took so long."

"No, it's fine." She told you, coming down the stairs. "How was it?"

You smiled at her lack of worry for you now that you were all grown up, "It was very relaxing."

"Well, I'm glad that you had a relaxing time." She smiled and steered you toward the kitchen. "Any ideas of what your plans are going forward?"

"Nothing yet, but I have a plan to start looking at things tomorrow." You explained and she nodded in approval.

A small orange light drew you to the windows facing the beach. The pit where you usually set up a fire was lit and you were sure you were the only person who used it.

"Mom, is dad out at the pit?" You wondered, still staring at the fire.

"No, he's in bed." She chuckled, "One beer and he's out like a light."

"Oh, okay." You said, distracted and trying to figure out who would be using the pit. "I'm going to go down to the beach." You told her and didn't wait for an answer before opening the back door.

There really was only one other person who would use the pit now that everyone on the block had grown up and moved out.

"When things are hard and you're tired, light a fire, and it'll be like I'm next to you." His words rang through your head as you made your way onto the sand.

As you neared the pit, Jihoon's silhouette sitting on a log was unmistakable. Your mouth dropped open in surprise because he almost never came home and if he was on a visit, you would've heard about it and regretted that you weren't able to leave the city also.

"Jihoon?" You called out his name, finally reaching the pit.

His head whipped back towards you and in an instant a smile broke across his face. "Hey, you." He rose and pulled you into a hug. "It's been quite a while."

"It's been ages." You corrected him and lightly shoved him back.

He chuckled and sat back down, "I know."

You sat next to him and stared into the fire. "You could've texted."

"You could've texted first." He bantered back, feeling like you were on edge, like there was something you were trying to hide from him.

"Touché." You pointed a finger in a random direction. "What brings you home this time?"

"Seungcheol." Jihoon answered almost with a pout.

"What did you do to Soonyoung this time?" You wondered with a smile on your lips.

"NOTHING!" He exclaimed, "I swear. Seungcheol just sent me home to rest. He sent everyone home really."

"Rest." You repeated with air quotes and unbelief dripping from your voice.

"Stop that." He smacked your hands away, "My dad did the same thing but I swear I'm here for a rest. I'm not going to work one bit."

You looked over at him with eyes that didn't believe a word he said.

"Believe me." He deeply pleaded.

Shrugging, you looked back at the fire and let the conversation point dissipate.

"What about you?" Jihoon asked once he knew he'd won the banter. "What brings you home?"

You sighed and spit out the reason you and your parents told everyone who asked, "The city was starting to stress me out and I just needed a break."

"Anything in particular?" He pushed further.

You shook your head, not ready to admit what happened to him. "No. Just missed home."

"And the reason for the fires every night?" He inquired, repeating information he'd heard from his mother.

You looked at him with a faked playful smile, "Can't a girl make a campfire because she misses her best friend?"

"Is that why you came home? Cause you missed me?" Jihoon asked, not ready to give up the search for the real reason you came home.

"Partly." You admitted because it was partly true.

"Will you tell me the other part?" He questioned with a soft voice.

Chewing on your lip, you watched the flames flicker and dance in a wind that only it could feel.

"I had a huge blowout with my roommate and she essentially kicked me out." You began to tell him all the shit events of probably the worst year of your life. "My job is turning into something I didn't even sign up for, let alone, know how to do. My boyfriend and I broke up because he cheated on me. A lot of my friends have stopped talking to me, whether it be because they're all busy or they just legit forgot about me. It really all came tumbling down so I decided to work out of the office and come back home until I could figure out what I was going to do next."

Jihoon stiffened when he heard you were cheated on. And it sparked a flame of anger inside of him for some reason.

"Was it the same guy you were dating when you came to Chilhong's wedding?" He wondered, picturing the guy in his head. The one he never liked from the second you started dating him. Only because he though he would be better.

"The one and the same." You nodded, "I never thought he'd be the time of guy to do it but then again, everyone seems to be proving me wrong lately."

"For the record, I never liked him." He muttered, intending for you to hear.

You let out a breathy laugh, "You never seem to like anyone I date."

"Why didn't you tell me that all this happened? I could've helped." Jihoon turned towards you with a questioning look.

You shrugged, "We hadn't talked in almost a year and I kept seeing news articles about schedules that Seventeen was having. So I didn't want to burden you with my own problems. I'm sure you had your hands overflowing with your own."

He scoffed, "I wasn't that busy."

You raised your eyebrows at him, silently calling him out on his blatant lie.

"I wasn't busy enough to not have time for you." He corrected himself. "I always have time for you. You're my best friend. You always will be."

"You could've called me first." You jabbed, "So I would've known when you had some free time."

Jihoon smiled softly and nodded, "I could've. But it's a little hard to bring yourself to contact the person you like when you know she's in a relationship with someone else." He blabbered before he could stop himself.

It took both of you a couple seconds to process what was just said. Jihoon, rightfully, froze and waited for your reaction. You were startled at his sudden confession and a little frustrated that he would mention it when you were offloading about how shitty your year had been.

"You could've done without saying that." You said lowly, looking out towards the water and away from him.

Jihoon, though shocked he let the words slip, didn't really regret saying it. "When else would I have been able to tell you?"

"Next time." You stated, "When I had some of my life figured out."

"And when will next time be?" He questioned, "Five years from now? We never see each other, we never call or text. I get your life updates from my parents who get it from your parents and let's be real, I know you don't tell your parents every single detail of your life." He was starting to get frustrated with you and he couldn't stop it.

But you were beginning to feel the same and you couldn't stop it either.

"Well, maybe if you would've just picked up the damn phone and called me to let me know that you actually had time for me, then maybe we would talk more." You spat him, the burn of tears appearing behind your eyes.

"You were the one who stopped talking to me first." He accused you, "I was always waiting for you to contact me first. So why didn't you?"

"Because I thought you'd forgotten about me!" You exclaimed the truth with tears in your eyes.

Jihoon blinked at you. "You thought I'd..." He hadn't realized how his messages and timing had seemed from your point of view until then.

"It's what all my friends said." You breathed out, "I didn't believe them at first but then your texts started getting farther apart and shorter and the conversations we were having started becoming repetitive. And then I figured it must be true. You were forgetting about me. So I gave up first before you could give up."

"But I would never." He breathed out.

"Well, with everything that's happened in the last couple years, you'll have to forgive me for believing it." You told him and wiping at your eyes. "Nothing good happened and I didn't want to be hurt by you so I gave up first."

"So in the timeline of things, when did you give up?" He asked, not sure if he really wanted to know the answer to his question.

You took a deep calming breath, "After I broke up with him." You revealed. "I thought I was going to be okay but moving back here and seeing your house everyday made me miss you and regret cutting off communication with you. So I came down here, made a fire, and wished that you would come to the fire like you promised. I missed my best friend. Though I didn't think you'd confess."

"Neither did I." Jihoon admitted. "But I did. And I guess the ball's in your court. Though your wish did come true." He stood and shoved his hands in his pockets, "I came back."

You watched him as he walked back to his house. Hugging your knees, you looked back at the fire and let the dying light dry out your eyes. He was right, he did come back. Just when you needed him.

But now you were confused, did you need him as your best friend or as something more. Sure, you'd always had a little crush on him but you squashed the idea down to grain of sand a long, long time ago. There was no way you were going to date him you had decided. He was Jihoon and you were (y/n). Two people destined to be best friends forever.

Yet, knowing he had a crush on you began to make you wonder if you two could become something more.

Sighing, you dispersed the logs and let the crashing waves distract you while you waited for the fire to die out. It wasn't the night you wanted and in the dark of the night, you let a few tears slip out.

The next morning, you woke up, made your morning drink, and strolled back onto the beach. The sun was shining and the skies were clear and the air was fresh.

When you reached the pit, your spoken and unspoken words hung in the air like smoke. Thick and heavy. You were about to grab your phone to text Jihoon when you noticed an envelope tucked into the sand. Not remembering it from the night before, you picked it up to see your name scrawled in Jihoon's handwriting across the front.

Settling yourself on the log and your drink in the sand, you pulled out the folded papers.

"I had to leave early this morning for an emergency meeting at the company but I thought I'd be a little romantic and leave you a letter instead of a text." Jihoon had written. "I guess the word 'rest' really isn't in my vocabulary but this is for you. You don't have to do or say anything in regards to what I confessed last night but know that I'm always here for you. I will try my best to show you that I have never and will never forget about you. You're my best friend and nothing will ever change that. I promise."

On the second piece of paper were lyrics written and the title was simply 'Campfire.' As you read through the lyrics, a tear fell down your cheek. You wiped it away and chuckled at your own emotions.

"Asshole." You muttered at him but it was all in humor.

You pulled out your phone and called him, hoping he wasn't yet in the meeting.

The car was filled with calm conversations as Wonwoo, Seungcheol, and him were being driven into the city. Jihoon was startled out of his thoughts by his phone ringing with a call. Your name appeared on his screen and he quickly hushed the other two who gave him confused looks.

"(y/n)?" He answered the call and Wonwoo and Seungcheol gave each other knowing looks before looking away to give Jihoon some privacy.

"You, sir," You chuckled, "Are one emotional asshole. You know that?" You spoke the words with a light tone that made a giggle rise in his chest.

"I'm guessing you went down to the pit this morning." He concluded.

"I did." You confirmed. "And I think a text would've sufficed just fine."

"Psh, where's the fun in that?" He bantered.

You laughed and then fell silent for a second, looking out at the horizon. "Uhm, what are you doing on Saturday?" You asked, heart beating a million miles an hour.

"Saturday? I might have rehearsals for most of the day." He told you, thinking about their schedule.

"Do you think I could steal you away for an hour or two?" You wondered, "So I can buy you dinner or something?"

Jihoon's smile grew when he figured out what exactly you were asking him, "No, you can't. Because I'm going to buy you dinner." He told you before your heart could crack.

His words ballooned in your chest and you couldn't hold back the smile on your face.

"If you buy dinner, I get to buy dessert then." You stated, determined to buy him something.

Jihoon nodded, "Sure, you do that." He said though he'd already resolved that you wouldn't be spending a penny on anything.

"Great. Text me when you know your schedule for certain." You said, a little giddiness seeping into your voice.

"I will." Jihoon agreed, "I'll talk to you soon."

"Yupp." You said, "Bye." Then you hung up the phone with your heart excited and fluttering.

Jihoon lowered his phone and could not wipe the smile off his face.

"Someone's happy." Wonwoo commented, side-eyeing him.

"Good news?" Seungcheol wondered, looking back.

"Good news." Jihoon nodded, "Thanks for making me go home."

"Hoshi..." Joshua said his name with caution as we both didn't know what was going through the younger's mind.

"Why is (y/n)'s side so small compared to yours?" Hoshi questioned, reading over each side's guests repeatedly.

Dino stepped next to Hoshi and looked at the list over the older's shoulder. "Yeah, hyung, you have SO many more people than she does. That's not fair."

Joshua and I chuckled.

"What do you mean it's not fair?" Joshua asked with a shake of his head.

"I just don't have as many friends." I explained to them with a nonchalant shrug. "Most of my guests are family and the few friends I have."

"You have more friends, right?" Wonwoo wondered, leaning forward in his seat.

I gave him a small shoulder raise and a head shake. "I really don't. That's pretty much it."

Seungkwan opened his mouth to protest but I was quick to cut him off.

"I've always been like that." I said to everyone in the group, "I just never had that many friends to begin with and I never needed more than the few that I had. Everyone who I wanted to invite was invited and those that are coming are on the guest list."

"Nope, we're changing this." Seungkwan shook his head and grabbed a pen from the table. He grabbed the list from Hoshi's still outstretched hands and laid it on the table for everyone to see.

I watched and felt the giggles rise in my throat as Seungkwan crossed out his name from Joshua's side and rewrote it under my side of the list.

"Who else wants to be on (y/n)'s side?" Seungkwan raised his head and looked at his other members.

Everyone except for Jeonghan, Dino, Mingyu, and Wonwoo raised their hands to be switched to my side of the guest list. Seungkwan quickly crossed off their names and rewrote them under my guest list.

"You guys do know that it doesn't really change anything, right?" Joshua questioned the members who raised their hands.

"It changed what side we sit on, and we want to sit on (y/n)'s side." Dokyeom stated with determination.

I smiled widely, "Thanks, guys, but aren't you technically Joshua's friends?"

Jun shook his head aggresively, "We know nothing about this Joshua guy you're marrying. Tell us everything we need to know so as some of your bestest friends, we can beat him up if he hurts you."

"We're both of your friends. And on your wedding day, we'll sit on your side to show everyone that we are for both of you." Seungcheol commented. "You're also our friend, (y/n)."

Vernon pointed two fingers at his eyes and then turned them towards Joshua. "You better watch out, hyung." He said with humorously serious tone, "I'm watching you."

Joshua raised both of his hands in surrender, "I will do whatever to avoid the wrath of the great Vernon." He joked which pulled laughter from all the members.

------------------------------

"One more, just like that." The photographer said as Joshua and I stood as still as statues in a pose that was starting to feel awkward. His lips were resting on my forehead and my cheeks were starting to tire from holding the 'soft' smile in place for so long.

"Alright," The photographer said after snapping a couple more photos, "All done." He announced and as soon as he stepped away, the twelve guys who were crowding around the doors pushed into the room with laughs and smiles and an excitement that had my own nerves buzzing like an electric fence.

"Joshua!" Jeonghan loudly said, "You look amazing!"

I watched as Hoshi took in Jeonghan's comment before he sucked in a big breath and nearly screamed, "(Y/N)! YOU LOOK ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!"

I chuckled as Jeonghan threw Hoshi a playful glare and felt Joshua chuckle beside me. The members gathered around us and kept cooing and giving us compliments on our attire.

"I can't believe Joshua is getting married!" Minghao said shaking Vernon's shoulder with the biggest smile on his face.

"You really picked out an amazing dress, (y/n)." Seungkwan commented and fluffed my skirt a little.

"Thank you." I giggled, suddenly very shy in front of the members even though I'd spent nearly everyday with them for the past few years. I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks and tried to cover it with the flower bouquet but Woozi caught me.

"She's blushing!" He pointed at my face which only made me blush harder. "She's embarrassed!" He laughed and Joshua wrapped an arm around me, pulling me closer as the others chuckled along.

"After all these years, this is the one moment she's embarrassed." Mingyu mused.

I pouted, "You guys never showered me with compliments like this before. It's weird." I told them but they all shook their heads.

"You're the weird one." Wonwoo concluded.

"But you're my weirdo." Joshua whispered into my ear before kissing my temple.

Before any of the guys could comment on the gesture, the photographer started giving instructions to capture some pictures with the members. Which then turned into a competition to who could pose the weirdest and pull the biggest laugh out of both Joshua and I.

Let's just say that Jun had something to brag about for the next couple weeks.

------------------------------

My hand was sweating around the bouquet of flowers I was gripping. The spotlights shone on my back and casted a shadow in front of me. And the only thing that was keeping me grounded in the midst of all my nervousness was Joshua's iron clad grip on my other hand.

Instead of going through the painstaking process of picking one of the members to officiate our ceremony, Joshua and I decided to choose one of my other guy friends so we could avoid all the hurt feelings among the Seventeen members. My friend stood in front of us, mic in hand, and was giving his short speech about how he met me and how he came to know Joshua.

"And now," He turned slightly towards Joshua, "If the groom would answer in a loud clear voice for the whole room to hear. Do you, Joshua Hong, promise to love, care, support, and be (y/n)'s best friend for the rest of your lives?"

Joshua inhaled before, in a loud, clear voice, saying, "I do!"

Immediately after he answers, the members sat on my side of the wedding hall suddenly erupted:

"AYE!" "What did he say?" "I couldn't hear you!" "That wasn't loud enough!" "Can you say it again?" "Joshua, you can do better!" "Pfffft! Weeeak!"

The other guests chuckled and I glanced over at Joshua who squeezed his eyes shut in embarrassment. Of course his members wouldn't let his day go on without a bit of teasing.

My friend looked at Joshua with laughter in his eyes, "The audience said they couldn't hear you. Once more, if you will, please." He suggested and Joshua sighed.

Taking a bigger breath, before quite literally screaming, "I DO!"

And instead of more comments, the members simply applauded his answer.

Then my friend turned to me and asked me the same question, in the same manner.

"Now if the bride will also answer in a loud clear voice. Do you, (y/n) (y/l/n), promise to love, care, support, and be Joshua's best friend for the rest of your life?" He asked with slightly raised eyebrows.

I breath in a breath, and in a similar volume to Joshua's first attempt, answered, "I do!"

The members from both sides, cheered, but unlike after Joshua's answer, they were cheers of joys and not a hint of teasing was sensed.

"Wahoo!" "Yeah!" "Beautiful!" "Perfect!"

Joshua scoffed under his breath as my shoulders relaxed. I gave his hand a small squeeze and he squeezed mine twice in reply.

The Seventeen members always knew how to make any event fun and memorable.

------------------------------

"Next we have a gift from the Seventeen members." My friend said, motioning towards the side of the stage.

My eyes widened in surprise because no one had mentioned they were preparing anything. Joshua and I shuffled and turned to face the side where the other members were gathering and giggling with each other as a few mics were handed to them to share.

"Joshua and (y/n). Congratulations and, guys, hands up." Seungcheol looked at the members to his left and right and they all raised their right hands, "We promise to always keep you two laughing and keep your children, whenever they come, smiling and protected."

"Yes, we do!" The other members yelled in unison just as the music to "Happy Ending" began to play through the speakers.

I leaned towards Joshua, "Did you know they were doing this?" I asked him.

"If I did, you know I would have stopped them." Joshua answered and it was clear that the members had left the both of us in the dark on purpose.

The members sang and bounced around together in their positions. I watched each member sing their part and they added some ridiculously exaggerated dance moves that had me giggling and laughing. Whenever Joshua's lines would come up, they'd all just scream the words at the top of their lungs which sent the whole hall into fits of laughter.

By the end of the song, I had tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. I sang along with the members not really caring that I was supposed to look cute for the pictures. It was way too much fun.

The last line of the song, the Seventeen members disregarded their idol image and screamed the last "ayo" while jumping and posing into the weirdest formation ever.

Hoshi was lying on the floor. Dokyeom and Minghao were acting like they were high school sweethearts. Wonwoo, Mingyu, and Woozi were saluting Joshua as if he was being sent into war. Seungcheol, Jeonghan, and Dino were huddled together, whispering and pointing at us like giggling high school girls. Jun, Vernon, and Seungkwan were aggressively doing jazz hands with smiles that almost looked painful.

I applauded and laughed at their poses while Joshua chuckled at his best friends ridiculousness.

------------------------------

"To the lady who suggested a train-less dress for the reception, you are a goddess." I said to the ceiling as I stepped out of the changing room.

Joshua was waiting outside the room and he smirked when he heard me.

"Was the wedding dress that much of a hassle?" He questioned.

I shook my head, "It just would've been awful to drag the train around all day." I answered him as he extended out his hand.

Grabbing his hand, he led me towards the reception hall where all our friends and family were enjoying a meal together. Also where we would make our rounds and thank everyone for coming to our ceremony.

"I would've carried the train for you." Joshua told me as we walked.

"Yeah, I know you would've." I replied, "Which is exactly why I'm thankful I got a dress without one."

"What? You don't think I would be strong carry that train for you?" He prodded the thought with a pout.

"I know you're strong enough." I rolled my eyes, squeezing his hand and leaning into him slightly, "But if you were carrying my train, you would be behind me, not next to me, like you are right now."

"Ah, I see." Joshua smirked, "So I'm just so good looking, you want to always look at me."

I barked out a laugh at his reasoning and played along. "That's definitely it, Josh."

We made our way around the large reception hall and thanked our guests for coming. Everyone complimented us and told us it was a beautiful wedding and we accepted it all with large smiles and my heart was so full of love it felt like it would have bursted. 

When we reached the area where we sat our family and the Seventeen members, Seungkwan, Hoshi, Jun, and Dokyeom made a beeline for me.

They wrapped me up in a bear hug, effectively pulling me away from Joshua.

"Congratulations!" Dokyeom said, smiling like an idiot which only made me smile more.

"You looked and are looking amazing!" Hoshi commented.

"You did wonderful and oh my gosh! You're married now!" Seungkwan exclaimed.

"You're Mrs. Joshua Hong!" Jun added.

"I know!" I squealed, unable to contain my own excitement any longer.

I looked over at Joshua, who was surrounded by Mingyu, Wonwoo, Dino, and Jeonghan, all smiles and bright eyes.

"Oi," Joshua looked over at my little huddle of people, "What was all that about me not being loud enough. I was loud enough." He pouted slightly which made me giggle.

"You were not loud enough, hyung." Hoshi bantered.

"Yeah, we could barely hear you. And we were in the front row." Vernon joined in on the teasing.

"You guys just love playing me, don't you?" Joshua wondered with a defeated sigh.

"Always, hyung." Dino answered him. "And we're not ever going to stop."

"Great." Joshua said with an airy chuckle.

------------------------------

Joshua and I sat on the couch a couple weeks later, watching our recently acquired wedding video with a bowl of popcorn between the two of us. Our vows started in the video and Joshua groaned next to me.

"I hope they didn't include the-"

"AYE!" "What did he say?" "I couldn't hear you!" "That wasn't loud enough!" "Can you say it again?" "Joshua, you can do better!" “Pfffft! Weeeak!"

The members’ voices rang through the TV speakers and the camera zoomed in on the group of members with laughter and teasing written on their faces.

I laughed while Joshua rested his head in his hands as he was asked to repeat his answer in the video.

"Forever. That is forever recorded, and documented in this video." Joshua chuckled in dismay.

"You have to admit, they made the ceremony at least a little fun." I tried to reason with him through the remnants of my laughter.

My turn came up on the TV and it was then that we both realized that my answer was, in fact, not even close to the volume of either of Joshua's answers.

"That is-, you were not even as loud as me!" Joshua gestured at the TV. "Yet, they praised you and gave me shit."

I cuddled into his side and rested my chin his shoulder, "Just think, you can be apart of the next teasing party at the next wedding ceremony."

"How do you know there's gonna be another one?" Joshua glanced down at me with a questioning eyebrow.

I tilted my head slightly, "A certain leader may have come to me for engagement ring advice for his special someone."

"Seungcheol's proposing?!" Joshua exclaimed with wide eyes.

"Shhh." I pressed my finger against his lips, "Don't tell anyone. It's a surprise for literally everyone. He doesn't want anyone to know yet."

"My lips are sealed." Joshua 'zipped' his lips closed. "But, I'm getting payback at his wedding." He stated with determination. "Mark my words, Mrs. Hong. I will get payback. "

I lowered myself into my chair and glanced at the time while my computer screen awakened.

9:06 am.

There was also a text from Taehyung.

From Taehyung: Now you're going on a date with him??

To Taehyung: Do you two share EVERYTHING?

From Jungkook: Be there in 20 minutes!

To Jungkook: Namjoon's coming somewhere between 10 and 12 fyi

From Taehyung: Apparently yes, yes we do

With a little bit of time left until one or two of the members showed up, I decided to touch up a demo I hadn't looked at in a while. I clicked on the locked folder and quickly typed in the password. The folder opened up and revealed the good sized list of documents with written lyrics. I scanned down the list for the one titled "Demo Attempt Thing #40 - Got That Heat."

As that document loaded, I opened the file with the actual demo track.

From Jungkook: I know, we talked about it last night.

Oh god. Last night.

From Jungkook: How do you live with a melody stuck in your head?!

To Jungkook: I don't. That's why I'm always in the studio 😂

Once the system is loaded and I arranged the windows how I wanted them on my three screens (yes, three), I hit play and listened to my (cringey) voice sing my written lyrics and read over the lyrics, looking for spots that were odd and marking them for later.

A couple of tweaks, and a few thesaurus searches, later and I was set to rerecord the lyrics I changed.

I set up the mic and the system and placed the headphones over my ears. With a final inhale, I pressed the space bar and lined my mouth up with the mic.

Tick, tick, tick, tick.

Ooh, when I look in the mirror

I'll melt your heart with my heat

I got that superstar glow so

Do the shimmy like

Pulling back, I hit the space bar again and the recording stopped. I chewed on my lip as I replayed the section back and wondered if it was good enough.

"Ehhhhh, good enough." I mumbled to myself after listening to the part two more times.

Moving onto the next changed lyric, I set myself up the same before hitting the space bar.

Tick, tick, tick, tick.

Swing like batter

Pull me in like no other

No need to rush it

I'm reminded I got it bad

I clicked the space bar again and listened to the new lyric. Liking what I heard, I replayed the whole song from the beginning, turning up the volume so it filled the room and so I could hear everything I needed to hear.

The only problem?

My ears were so filled with the demo that I didn't hear the three knocks on the door, Jungkook calling my name, or my door opening and closing. I was too busy bopping my head along with the beat and focusing on the overall sound with my eyes closed.

Get it, let it roll!

My voice sang the last lyric with a weird squeal type tone and my eyes flew open in realization that it needed to change and it needed to change right then and there.

"Let it roll!" Jungkook's voice loudly copying what he heard through the speakers quite nearly knocked me out of my chair.

"Who the hell???" I whipped around with a pencil gripped in my hand, eraser side up.

Jungkook unceremoniously dropped the backpack he was holding in his hands and raised both hands into the air. "It's me. Jeon Jungkook. Part of the infamous KPOP group B-"

"I know who you are dumbass." I cut him off, rolled my eyes and relaxed back into my seat, throwing the pencil somewhere onto my desk.

"You asked." He chuckled and picked up his backpack.

"You didn't have to scare the shit out of me." I stated, leaning forward and saving my work before exiting out of the "Demo Attempt Thing #40 - Got That Heat" documents.

"Wait, wait, what are you doing?" Jungkook asked, pulling the extra chair to sit on my left.

"Exiting out of this track." I answered in a bored monotone cause it should've been obvious.

"Why?" He continued to question my actions even though my screen was just showing my crowded desktop.

"Because this is one of the secrets that no one will ever see." I leaned my cheek on my fist while looking at him.

He was also dressed in sweats and a shirt that looked six sizes too big for him which made his large frame look small, if that was even possible. His lips were pouting while scanning over my screens even though, again, there was nothing open.

"But I liked what I heard." Jungkook said with a slight whine.

"Stop being nice.” I scoffed, “Where is that track you wanted to work on?" I quickly changed the subject.

Jungkook sighed like he wanted to continue to push the issue but he rummaged through his backpack and pulled out a black flash drive instead.

"Thank you." I thanked him with a singsong tone and plugged the flash drive into the computer. "What's the title?"

"Doesn't have one." Jungkook shrugged and I raised a questioning eyebrow at him. "I just call it 'Cup of Milk'."

"Cup of milk?" I repeated the title and found it easily as it was the first one on the drive.

"I was drinking a cup of milk while working on it so I used it as a temporary title but then it just stuck." He explained, "Sounds weird, doesn't it?"

"No, actually sounds about right." I agreed with him and watched as the instrumentals popped up on the screen. "Any lyrics for it?"

Jungkook shook his head, "Not yet."

I nodded, "That's alright. So, let's get into it.”

We listened through it once before I asked, “Where did you need help with?"

"Here." Jungkook took the mouse from me and started the track at the 2:07 minute, where a probable bridge would be constructed. He played it and the bass drums beat a steady funky rhythm.

At the 2:15 mark, the rhythm repeated itself before the bass dropped out and piano chords with a metalic-y techno echo picked up the same tempo. That too, repeated twice without much change before the bass reenters with the synth and a high gusto ending chorus feel.

I nodded along with the beats and enjoyed myself but I could instantly tell it needed a little something to feel more complete.

"You sense it too." Jungkook concluded when he paused the track. "It needs something but I have no idea what."

"Yeah, it does." I agreed and sat back, thinking about what it needed.

"Like I honestly love the bass beat and the rhythms but it needs a little, like finesse." Jungkook continued and emphasized the last word with a wiggle of his fingers.

I chuckled at his gesture but the motion gave me an idea.

"Trumpets!" I sat up and slapped a hand on his arm.

"Trumpets?" He said the word cautiously like it was glass on his tongue, "Do you think it'll work?"

I shrugged and took my mouse back from him, "We're about to find out." I told him and clicked around till I found the right instrument.

"Play out the melody." I instructed him and gestured to the keyboard underneath the computer monitors.

Jungkook wordlessly followed my instructions while I recorded the clip. The trumpets that played through the speakers were way too bright and brassy so I decided to pull back the brass and to make it more muted. When the levels were to my liking, I dragged the clip to the correct place and backtracked a few seconds to see how it would fit with the rest of the instrumental.

"Here we go." I muttered and hit play.

The same bass beat played through the speaker for one count and when the second began, the trumpets sounded over them to create a fanfare feel. Jungkook lit up next to me but my heart wasn't 100% satisfied with it.

"Oh! I like that!" Jungkook smiled widely while my lips pursed together. "I really like that." He nodded like a child.

Tilting my head to the side, I played around with the effects of the trumpets. "Not quite right."

I adjusted the levels of muting and brightness and reverb and played it back again. This time when the trumpets sounded, they felt more retro fanfare rather than 21st Century fanfare.

"That." I pointed to the screen after I paused the track, "That is what I like."

"Oooh, you're right. That was better." Jungkook rested his hand under his chin, in deep thought. "It fits better with the rest of the instruments. More retro-y."

I nodded before asking, "Since when were you on a retro stint?"

Jungkook shrugged, "Again, cup of milk." He reiterated with an expression that said 'how am I supposed to know?'

"Uh huh." I absentmindedly voiced while looking for another instrument to add because it needed something over the piano chord counts. "Cup of milk. Was it at least chocolate?"

"Banana." He corrected me.

"Ah, the famous banana milk strikes again." I said and clicked on the electric guitar option.

Jungkook stayed quiet while I pressed different notes on the keyboard, searching for the perfect note. Once I found the note, I sat up straighter and tapped out the syncopated rhythm that I heard throughout the song.

"Oh, yeah, rock on." Jungkook played the air guitar and scrunched up his face as if he was actually playing the instrument.

I watched him for a second before shaking my head and chuckling at him. "Gosh, you're weird." I muttered under my breath but Jungkook heard me and laughed at my comment.

"And yet you're still here." He bantered back and I truly had no comeback.

Instead, I dragged the newly created sound into the track and placed it where I wanted it before playing the whole section.

The synth-ed piano chords went through one full count and the second was joined by the electric guitar which amped up the whole feel. Building towards the final 'chorus' section where the track exploded into retro fanfare glory.

"YES!" Jungkook stood to his feet with his fists raised into the air before grooving along with the instrumental.

"You like it that much?" I leaned back in my chair and watched him with amusement.

"Doesn't it make you want to dance?" He asked while the song replayed from the beginning and he began his little dance party all over again.

"It's got a great vibe, Kook. It's really great." I compliment his work. "Now you just gotta write lyrics for it and I'm sure it'll be featured on the next album."

"You think?" Jungkook stopped moving and peered at me with wide curious eyes.

I nodded, "Of course. It's a really great track. It's fun, it's funky, and it's something I could see you boys pulling off so easily."

"Huh." He breathed out and slumped into the chair. "Didn’t think you’d say that.” 

"Again, you'll need lyrics for it but you can do that." I repeated my earlier statement but Jungkook looked like he didn't hear me.

"I gotta make the lyrics badass. Like really good." Jungkook said softly, "It's gotta explode like a bomb. Like dynamite."

I bit my lip at the word. I had half a song written out, tucked away in my Demo folder. A song that suddenly seemed to fit the instrumental extremely well.

A song that I had titled 'Dynamite'.

"Scheming face!" Jungkook exclaimed, breaking me from my thoughts.

I quickly turned to look at him, "What?"

"You were scheming something." He pointed at my face and then copied the expression I had a few moments ago. More like a bad impression of my face. "So what were you scheming?" He wondered.

I debated with myself if I was really about to show this man one of my many secret tracks that I had hidden away.

"Please..." Jungkook dragged out the world with the biggest puppy eyes.

I sighed in defeat and leaned forward to the computer. "Fine. But you do not, do NOT, tell anyone about this."

"Cross my heart and hope to die." Jungkook solemnly swore and drew an 'X' over his heart.

I rolled my eyes at his silliness but my heart fluttered in adoration at his tactics.

Opening my private folder, I opened my 'Dynamite' instrumental and lyric document.

"When did you make this?" Jungkook wondered, quickly reading over the unfinished lyrics.

"Uh..." I looked up at the ceiling in thought, "Like four-ish months ago?" I questioned even my own knowledge because in all honesty, I don't remember when I started the piece or when I last worked on it. "I haven't done a lot of work on it. It's only got a tapped out bass rhythm with what lyrics I have."

Before we could play through it, though, two quick knocks on my door disrupted our conversation.

After looking at the time and realizing it must be Namjoon, I called out, "Come in."

The door opened and Namjoon walked in with his phone in one hand and his laptop and small notebook in the other. He glanced over Jungkook like it wasn't a surprise that he was here.

"Hey Jungkook. Hey (y/n)." He greeted us while staring at his phone and sitting on the couch just behind Jungkook's chair.

"Sup, hyung?" Jungkook greeted his leader with a short head nod.

"Hi." I answered and again, began saving and exiting out of the tracks that weren't needed. "What did you want to run by me?" I inquired and turned my chair towards Namjoon.

"Oh!" Namjoon remembered why he had shown up to my studio and shoved his phone into his pocket. He opened his small leather notebook and flipped through the pages till he found the one he wanted. "You think this would fit in the space where we left blank last time?" He offered me the notebook and I took it with both hands.

"Which song?" I asked because we had worked on three different tracks during our last session.

"Turning." Namjoon answered and Jungkook scrunched his eyebrows in confusion.

"What kind of a song title is that?" He poked fun at the title.

"What kind of a title is 'Cup of Milk'?" I threw the question back in his face with a glance and his jaw went slack.

"That's a temporary title!" He pouted while Namjoon laughed at our banter.

I busied myself with opening the correct documents while Jungkook continued to pout and Namjoon continued to poke fun that someone finally shot Jungkook down into his place.

Reading over the lyrics once more, I played the instrumental part with the melody tracked on the keyboard and mentally sang along with the newly shown lyrics.

"Yeah, I think we could make it work." I told Namjoon my thoughts on his lyrics and the waved a hand at Jungkook. "You've been demoted to couch."

Jungkook playfully glared at me but moved so Namjoon could take his spot.

"So I was thinking," Namjoon leaned is arms on the desk and shifted into producer mode, "Since it's the second pre-chorus, we could layer the harmonies. Not too many cause I don't want it to sound distorted."

"We could add a lower and higher harmony." I suggested, "With the base melody. Unless you wanted the base melody to disappear and only have the harmonies."

"We could try both?" Namjoon inflected his voice upwards at the end, unsure of the words he spoke.

"Let's try it." I shrugged and set up the mic and the system.

40 grueling minutes later, the harmonies and melodies were exactly how Namjoon wanted them. And because he needed a better singer for them, I had to record all the lyrics.

"Can you also read over these lyrics for me?" Namjoon asked, moving towards the couch where his laptop sat. "I don't know if they fit together well and I need a second opinion."

"Don't know how good my opinion will be but, yeah, let's do it." I nodded and rose out of my chair. Jungkook moved from the couch to my unoccupied chair but we paid little attention to him. He'd been quiet while we worked and hadn't caused a ruckus so there wasn't any need to worry about him.

Or so I thought.

While I read through the lyrics Namjoon wrote for a different song, I heard Jungkook putzing around on my computer but again, since he hadn't caused any trouble before, I paid him no mind. I really should've.

Just as I was about to make a lyrical suggestion to Namjoon, my voice, along with the instrumental for the demo that Jungkook heard a bit of, blasted through the speakers.

My reflexes had me out of my seat in a millisecond but Jungkook was quick to turn his chair around and block me from reaching the computer.

"Jungkook!" I yelled over the music, "Turn it off! Seriously!" I went to reach past him but he grabbed my hands and wouldn't let them go.

"Never!" He yelled back with a shit-eating grin.

His grin only made me fight harder to get past him but the guy had been working out and was stronger than I thought he would be.

"I am going to kill you!" I threatened the maknae with a death glare, still trying to push past him to turn my demo off.

"Before or after our date?" Jungkook wondered with a quipped eyebrow.

My eyes widened slightly at the mention of our date. That asshole would bring it up when there was another member in the room.

"Is this yours, Kook?" Namjoon asked, voice trying to beat out the music.

Jungkook shook his head aggressively, "It's (y/n)'s!" He said with a head tilt towards me.

I groaned and pushed away from him. Jungkook turned back to the computer and lowered the volume but kept the song playing.

"Seriously?" Namjoon questioned, turning towards me as I walked back towards the door.

"Yeah." I sighed in embarrassment. These were private, a secret, because I wasn't 100% confident with my lyrical skills.

"You produced it?" Namjoon continued to fire questions at me.

I nodded.

"And wrote the lyrics?" He prodded, his expression bordering on amazement.

I nodded again.

"This is, this is great!" Namjoon thrusted his hands out in front of him for emphasis and his usually small eyes were wide. Like the widest I had ever seen them.

A tiny blush crept up onto my cheeks. "Really?" I questioned cause I really had no confidence in my lyrical abilities. But then again, who does?

"Yeah, really!" Namjoon nodded his head.

"I told you!" Jungkook exclaimed with a fist pump into the air.

I shot him a look but he only answered with a smug smile. Looking back at Namjoon, he was tapping his pen against his leg while in thought.

"What?" I urged him to think out loud.

"It's really good. Just that some of the lyrics could use some editing." He voiced but there was no condescention in his tone, just a brightness and excitement over the song. My song.

I nodded, "Yeah, I expected that. Though I really didn't expect anyone to actually hear it." I gave Jungkook a pointed look and again he just answered with a wide, teeth bearing smile.

Damn alcohol that made me spill my guts to this scheming asshole.

"I can't believe you've been hiding this from us." Namjoon continued on his compliment cascade.

Jungkook threw out an arm in Namjoon's direction and gave you a look that said 'I told you so!' as an agreement with his leader's words.

I crossed my arms over my chest and rolled my eyes at Jungkook.

"I wasn't exactly ready to show it to anyone yet." I told Namjoon who nodded in understanding.

"But now that I have heard it. Can I get a copy?" He asked, "I can try to edit the lyrics as a first round before we send it upwards." He suggested.

"Send it where now?" I widened my eyes in surprise, not thinking it was good enough to send for approval.

"Up...?" Namjoon repeated his word then quickly added, "But we don't have to. I just really, really like it. I think it can be good enough to be released."

I sighed, looking between Jungkook and Namjoon who were both hopeful that I would approve of the action.

"I'll give you the copy," I started and both guys quickly smiled, "But," I said and grabbed their attention again, "It goes nowhere without my approval. Do you understand?" I dropped my tone to prove how serious I was.

"Understood." Namjoon agreed, solemnly but the twinkle in his eye didn't diminish in the slightest.

Jungkook stayed quiet at the computer and I stared at him but he avoided my gaze.

"Jungkook..." I said with a warning tone, "Promise me you won't send this to any of the higher ups."

Jungkook finally met my eyes with sheepish glances like a child who got caught in the middle of a prank set up. "I promise." He said in a small voice, lips pouted.

Satisfied with his answer, I moved to the computer and this time, Jungkook let me pass without any trouble. I emailed the files to Namjoon and his phone notification going off let me know it was sent successfully.

"This is so cool." Namjoon mumbled, already looking at the email on his phone. Without looking up, he gathered his things and walked towards the door. "I'll see you guys later." He bid us goodbye before disappearing behind the door.

I watched the door shut closed and said, "You're dead."

Jungkook just clicked his tongue and in the smuggest voice, said, "No, I'm not."

I turned towards him with exasperation, "Jungkook..."

"Trust me, (y/n). You're going to be thanking me one day for this." He cut me off before I could scold him.

Slumping into the unoccupied chair, I let out yet another sigh and run my hands over my face.

"That's what I'm afraid of." I mumbled and looked up at the ceiling.

Jungkook looked at me in confusion, "What do you mean?"

"If I have to thank you one day for showing that demo to Namjoon, it means people liked it." I explained, sitting up properly and glancing around the room. "If people like it, it means that they will expectations for the next song. If people have expectations for the next song, that means I have a standard to live up to. I already have a high producing standard and if a lyrical one is added... What if I can't meet those expectations?"

Jungkook leaned forward and rested his hands over mine in my lap. "You," He stared hard into my eyes, "Do not have to worry about that. Everything you make is literally amazing. And if you're ever unsure, you always have me. I will always help you, critique you, and support you."

A tiny smile appeared on my lips.

"Plus from the two demos I saw," He continued, "You already have a pretty good knack for lyric writing."

"Thanks, Kook." I thanked him and his face broke out into a beautiful smile. The one where his eyes nearly disappear and his teeth are on full display.

"Of course!." He leaned back, pulling his hands away though I had the instinct to grab them again, "I would do anything for my favorite producer and person. OH! We could discuss these 'Dynamite' lyrics on Friday!" He suggested but I frowned.

"You promised no work talk on Friday." I reminded him and his lips dropped into an 'o.'

"Right. I did promise." Jungkook remembered and chewed the inside of his cheek. "Well, we better get some work done now before Namjoon comes back to remind me that we have more schedules to get to." He playfully raised his eyebrows, taking control of the mouse and opening the different files.

I giggled and leaned forward, resting my hand on his hand. His hand was larger than mine but I had to admit that I liked how my hand looked on top of his.

He glanced down at my hand before up at me.

I smiled the sweetest smile I could muster, "Get out of my seat before you screw up my systems." I threatened him and he stared at me in disbelief.

Then he chuckled and shook his head while rising out of my chair and mumbling, "How can someone so cute say something with such a terrifying tone?"

I reclaimed my seat and started clicking around my screens, "It's a skill." I answered his rhetorical with a smirk.